Dyslexic Man Walks Into a Bra

Ahhh I get the title now!

Haha...dyslexics of the world untie!

A man sits down at a bar and asks the bartender if he can show him something truly amazing if he will give him a free drink.

The bartender agrees and says "it better be truly amazing."

The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a bullfrog and a tiny piano. He sets the bullfrog down at the piano and it begins to play.

The bartender is amazed and gives the man his drink.

The man then says to the bartender "If I can show you something even more amazing than that will you give me another drink?"

The bartender agrees thinking that nothing can be more amazing than that.

The man reaches into another pocket and pulls out a mouse and sets him on the bar. As the bullfrog plays the piano the mouse begins to sing.

The bartender says "that is truly amazing" and gives the man another drink.

Meanwhile another gentleman who was sitting near by approaches the man with a briefcase...

The gentleman opens the briefcase and inside is hundreds of thousands of dollars. He says "I will give you one hundred thousand dollars for that mouse."

The man declines the offer telling him that the mouse is worth far more. The gentleman increases his offer several times.

Finally the man agrees to sell the mouse for $250,000. The gentleman gives him the briefcase filled with money and takes the mouse and leaves.

The bartender even more astonished than before says to the man... "You were foolish to sell that mouse for so little. You could have made millions with a singing mouse."

The man says "The bullfrog is a ventriloquist."

What does DNA stand for?
National Dyslexic Association
;-)

Okay my turn...

Did you hear the one aout the dyslexic pimp?......

....he bought a warehouse!!

Two guys rock into a new city and hit the main night spot for a night of drinking. After turning their pockets out they see they only have a few dollars between them, In despair and looking for inspiration one see's from the corner of his eye a butcher shop across the road.

Come with me he cries as he drags his mate across the road into the butcher shop where he spies a largish polish sausage hanging down fromthe racks behid the counter, and on inquiry they just had enough for the purchase.

Outside the question was asked, where the reply came, what we will do is is go into the bar and order drinks then when asked to pay what i will do is pop this sausage out from my pants and you can go down and suck on it, and from that we should get banned and turfed out of the pub with no bills to pay, free beer.

What a great plan his mate thought and true enough the first bar they entered into everything went to plan, they ordered a beer each and drank it down quickly then when asked for the money, out came the polish sausage and he went down and done his business.

You can imagine the ruckus, you pair of filthy buggers get out of my pup now before i throw you out.

Well they went all the way down the street visiting every bar with the same joke, and it must be said they were quite pizzled by the end of the night and a long list of bars.

Feeling quite proud of the nights achievements in a slurred voice he looked up and said to his buddy, "that was a great idea you had, we drank free beer all night and all it cost was a few bucks for a sausage from the butcher, this really is going to be a great story for my grand children one day, how about we get that sausage and share it up and eat it as i am starving hungry".

His mate looks back at him sheepishly and replies " I wished we could share it but i was hungry half way though the night so i ate it about 20 pubs ago"

I had a friend growing up who had audio dyslexia.

He was always fun be be around because he was smart, a bit odd, very intense, and exhibited sudden bursts of super human strength at opportune moments that extenuated the ridiculousness of the situation.

True story:

One day a friend observing this guys strangeness during casual conversation said:

"Brian you're weird."

Brian picked the guy up and tossed him across the room with one hand.

He then declared:

"Don't you ever call me a garden weeder!"