Talk about a bad month!

by solardave

Posted: 14 years ago 14 replies

OFF TOPIC

I don't even know where to start. We live out in the country in Kentucky and because of the cars flying by we fenced in our backyard so our dogs could go out and be safe. We've always had dogs and cats dropped here and we feed them as long as they stay around. We recently brought in a stray cat and let her come and go when she wanted. 3 weeks ago we let her out and went away for the day. We came home to find her dead on the highway. Just before that we had a real cute little dog show up after our 7" in 2 day rain we had. She just stayed and we fell in love with her. What a great little dog. 2 weeks ago she ran out in front of a car and we buried her. Today my wife was trimming up our little POM (Teddy) on the front porch. Yeah you guessed it, he got away from her and ran in front of a truck and we just buried him. I'm sitting here right now and I don't know how much more I could take. My wife blames it on herself and she is crushed. He was her baby.I realize now when I say I'm not an animal lover I'm lying because I am. I just don't have enough patience with little critters and wind up feeling guilty after they're gone, wishing I would patted him on the head more. I thought if I wrote it out I might feel better but I guess not. Thanks for being there.

Kurt 14 years ago

Hey Dave,

You have had some tough times. It's amazing how tight we can bond with pets.

I hope time will help ease the loss...
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- Kay King 14 years ago
  
  I am well known as one of animal lovers here - and I know what your wife is feeling. We tend to blame ourselves no matter what.
  
  What you know is that you are on a busy street - and no animal knows not to run in front of cars. That means cats are inside - and dogs are either fenced, inside or on a leash at ALL times. I live on a very quiet one block street but even so my dogs are inside, in the fenced back yard or on a leash even if just walking to get in the car. 99% of the time the dog would stay right with me - it's the 1% I can't trust.
  
  Next time - remember to pat your animals often as you walk by them. You'll feel better and the pets will love it. Pets are family - and we care about family. Kudos to you both for taking in animals that need a home.
  
  kay
  
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  Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world changes forever for that one dog
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solardave 14 years ago

Thank you Kurt and Kay.
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- ThomM 14 years ago
  
  I read this when you first posted it Dave, then all I could do was go out to the dining room and hug my cat.
  Mine I keep inside because of the crazy traffic on my road, I wish I didn't have to though.
  To loose 3 friends like that has got to hurt, my condolences to you and your wife.
  It wasn't her fault, just their time.
  
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solardave 14 years ago

Thanks Thom, It helps to have someone to bounce this off of. I appreciate you guys.
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- Kay King 14 years ago
  
  Remind your wife that every animal that leaves us leaves a space for one that needs us.
  
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  Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world changes forever for that one dog
  ***
  It actually doesn't take much to be considered a 'difficult woman' -
  that's why there are so many of us.
  ...jane goodall
  
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JustinDupre 14 years ago

I'm sorry to hear about your losses Dave. Pets are indeed part of family. Good luck and hope you feel better soon.
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HeySal 14 years ago

That has got to hurt. I am so sorry. Kay is right - it doesn't matter what you do, there is always some feeling of fault. My dog was soo far past his life expectancy when he died, yet I still felt I failed him. I wish there were something I could say to help your wife, but I have no words to heal that kind of loss.

Perhaps you folks could get a couple of "watch for animals" signs and put them at the edges of your property? It might not work, but if the fence isn't doing it, it is the only answer I have.

My sister has(had) 10 cats and 2 dogs -- every one a rescue. She lost her first last week and five of the cats are over 16. The one dog just diagnosed with bone cancer.

The dog is my friend and I am doing everything I know nutritionally and herbally to save him. It's pretty far along so I don't know if I can do this, but I will give it everything I have. If I fail, I know I will feel blame. I will also have the comfort of knowing that I made his life better in the ways I could. Sometimes that's all we have at the end of it. Sometimes it has to be enough.
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Sal
When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
Beyond the Path
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solardave 14 years ago

Thank you all. Sal, I don't envoy you with your sister's dog. This little dog Teddy was given to us and we said we'd find him a good home. We never looked for one because he fit right in here. We have (had) 3 inside dogs and if Denise had her way it'd be 50. We don't have a Humane Society in our county. We've been lobying for one for years to get one. here is how bad it is. Last summer we had a Yellow Lab show up that we think was either hit by a car or was in the early stages of Hip Dysplasia. She stayed around and we took care of her and then she wasn't around so we found her in the neighbors yard. Someone had poisoned her we think it was anti-freeze. By the time we found her it was to late. We were lucky our Vet was right across the street at the diner/store. He came over and gave her a shot. ( years of seeing these poor dogs and cats just thrown away). Why, who knows? About 3 years ago one showed up and he was just a bag of bones. starving to death and maybe if these were mean or vicious animals I might understand but the ones that show up here are just as good as they get. When I was growing up I had such a fear of dogs you could say it was a phobia. That has changed and maybe that's the bright light here but I"m writing this because I didn't sleep last night. I'm worried about my wife. I've never met anyone who loves animals more than her. We don't let our dogs out in the front yard. Our inside dogs stay inside. It was an accident. We can't keep all of the strays in the house so we live with the consequences. It does help to have people who care to talk to and I really do appreciate all of the kind things said here.
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HeySal 14 years ago

Thanks Dave - it sounds like Denise and I would get along. It's depressing to see how people treat their best friends. There is nothing more wonderful on this earth than a good dog. They protect, they help find your way if you lose the trail, they feel joy with you and they are there when you don't feel happy -- and they always KNOW. Yet people treat them like plastic disposable trash. I could never like anyone who my dog doesn't. That tells me something about a person because, as I said, dogs know.

Being bit is really a shame. It usually happens because someone doesn't understand the animal, and it makes people very unduly afraid of these wonderful people. I'm glad your wife has been able to bring you out of your fear.

Ricky is doing much better now. He is standing square again (the main tumor is on his shoulder so his stance and gate is effected. He had bare spots on his stomach and back and now fur is growing back - a good sign to me. He is wagging his tail again. My hopes are very high for this wonderful little guy. I was feeling very low when I got here without a dog of my own now -- and one look at him and it was all over for me. My sister has cared about him - enough to rescue him, but she doesn't LOVE him. She also doesn't believe that people (um..or pets) can live beyond a medical death sentence. I need this dog to heal - for him, for me, and for her.

Ricky and I went camping the other day. It was the first time he ever camped and the joy that he felt just filled our space. It just doesn't get any better than that.
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Sal
When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
Beyond the Path
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solardave 14 years ago

Sal,
I just sent you a PM back. I'm glad to hear about Ricky. I know he's in the right hands.You're right you and Denise would sure hit it off. They're all just "babies" to her. I lack patience but age is teaching me that the dogs are smarter than me and I need to listen more.
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JEL0221

14 years ago

Sorry to hear about your losses Dave.

I live next to a fairly busy street in Chicago and have lost two dogs to being hit by cars, and I know how it feels....terrible.

Like you mentioned, we went out of our way to keep a close eye on our dogs, have a gated backyard, etc..etc, but the moment there was a crack of a way out, they got out, and we felt guilty.

I hope you and your wife the best.

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Kay King 14 years ago

It was an accident.

That's exactly what it was - and we can't prevent accidents to ourselves, family or pets. We can only be as careful as we can - but we aren't God and can't prevent accidents from happening.

I feel for your wife as, like Sal, I lost a big dog a few years ago that left me crying for weeks. He was at end of his life span and had heart problems as Sal's dog did. All you can do is make them comfortable and happy while they are with you - and know when it's time to let go.

"The only bad thing about dogs is they don't live long enough".

The practice of abandoning animals is something I will never live to understand - it's cruelty at its worst.

kay
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Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world changes forever for that one dog
***
It actually doesn't take much to be considered a 'difficult woman' -
that's why there are so many of us.
...jane goodall
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solardave

14 years ago

Originally Posted by JEL0221

Thanks. We appreciate it.

Thanks

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Talk about a bad month!

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