Best way to propose to a girl

Profile picture of the author ramshankarN by
i am a jolly and fun loving person who used to hang arround in mall and streets with boys.But i am very weak in girls department,that is in front of girls i will be calm,silent which is not me,Actually i feel very shy.
so how to propose a girl :confused:
Any suggestion
#off topic

  • Profile picture of the author wcmylife
    Hire a private dating coach if you have the money...

    If you want free, read up stuff on the internet....doubleyourdating.com is a nice place to start and so is sosuave.com
  • Profile picture of the author KenThompson
    I assume you're talking about marriage?

    "Will you marry me"?

    That will do the trick and is unambiguous.

    Good luck. Congratulations, in advance. Name your
    first child, Ken.

    Ken
  • Profile picture of the author Norma Rickman
    Flash a nice big diamond at her.

    Guarantee that will catch her attention, and the "Will You Marry Me?" part will become very easy after that.

    Kidding. Just be yourself and be honest. A simple, direct question like Ken's is the way to go.
  • Profile picture of the author Sumit Menon
    Originally Posted by KenThompson View Post

    I assume you're talking about marriage?

    "Will you marry me"?

    That will do the trick and is unambiguous.

    Good luck. Congratulations, in advance. Name your
    first child, Ken.


    Ken
    From his name, I presume he is Indian. And in India, proposing and picking up are pretty synonymous.

    Sumit.

    PS. And if you weren't a regular OTer, I would have reported your post for blatant self-promotion.
  • Profile picture of the author glchandler
    how to propose a girl
    Previous entry deleted due to poor taste for what seems to be a serious inquiry for information/advice!
  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    Originally Posted by Sumit Menon View Post

    From his name, I presume he is Indian. And in India, proposing and picking up are pretty synonymous.

    Sumit.

    PS. And if you weren't a regular OTer, I would have reported your post for blatant self-promotion.
    And here I thought you proposed when you were BORN! I mean don't most families ARRANGE marriages from birth!?

    Steve
  • Profile picture of the author KenThompson
    Originally Posted by Sumit Menon View Post

    From his name, I presume he is Indian. And in India, proposing and picking up are pretty synonymous.

    Sumit.

    PS. And if you weren't a regular OTer, I would have reported your post for blatant self-promotion.
    I have a good friend who is Indian. Can't remember the state. Anyway,
    I wondered about the name and question. Actually, my Indian friend -
    Nilay, is in his mid-twenties and has explained quite a bit about how it
    works. Although I didn't know that proposing = picking up.

    Nilay has been resisting the efforts of his parents to marry him off. Not
    quite ready for it, I guess. Interesting dynamics, there.

    And thanks for the leniency.


    Ken
  • Profile picture of the author Sumit Menon
    Originally Posted by seasoned View Post

    And here I thought you proposed when you were BORN! I mean don't most families ARRANGE marriages from birth!?

    Steve
    That used to happen (a long time ago). And the gross thing was some of these marriages were arranged between first cousins. Don't really think the system exists anymore, except maybe, in some rural parts (and I'm just assuming).

    Now, marriages are arranged when a person is in their twenties (usually, early twenties for girls, and late twenties for guys).

    So, if a guy likes a girl and wants to marry her, he'd have to ask the girl of course, but he would (or his parents would) also have to ask the girl's parents for "her hand".

    Sumit.
  • Profile picture of the author rankontop
    be yourself and dont act impressed to much, keep it to yourself. and enjoy being a friend first.
  • Profile picture of the author Sumit Menon
    Originally Posted by KenThompson View Post

    Although I didn't know that proposing = picking up.

    Nilay has been resisting the efforts of his parents to marry him off. Not
    quite ready for it, I guess. Interesting dynamics, there.

    And thanks for the leniency.


    Ken
    Well, the phrase is not widely used. English is not the first language. Most people talk in Hindi or the native tongue.

    I didn't know it meant that either. Once when I was in 10th grade, a guy told me that one of our mutual friends had proposed to a girl. I was like, "What! He asked her to marry him?". And he said, "No. He asked her to be his girlfriend."

    I don't know if asking someone to be your girlfriend is called pick up. But, from what the OP posted, I figured that's what he wanted to do.

    Sumit.
  • Profile picture of the author JustinDupre
    Be honest! You should walk up to her.. take a deep breath and say "Hey, will you be my girl" or "Will you go have dinner with me sometimes" No point of doing your homework or come up with the best plan ever. Believe in yourself!

    Good luck buddy!
  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Why not just be real? Just enjoy your time with her and at some point the time will seem right - you will just feel it and need to say it. Then just say what is in your heart.

    Plans can be made - plans can go wrong. Timing or feelings might just not be right --- and it's just better if you just do it when you feel it the most. When the time is right, you won't be asking how to do it -- you will be asking her for her hand. It will be real and she will feel it and know.
  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    Originally Posted by Sumit Menon View Post

    That used to happen (a long time ago). And the gross thing was some of these marriages were arranged between first cousins. Don't really think the system exists anymore, except maybe, in some rural parts (and I'm just assuming).

    Now, marriages are arranged when a person is in their twenties (usually, early twenties for girls, and late twenties for guys).

    So, if a guy likes a girl and wants to marry her, he'd have to ask the girl of course, but he would (or his parents would) also have to ask the girl's parents for "her hand".

    Sumit.
    It's still done. I know at least 4 people that did it that way. Some spoke tamil as a native language, and some telagu, so they weren't even from the same part of india.
  • Profile picture of the author Sumit Menon
    Originally Posted by seasoned View Post

    It's still done. I know at least 4 people that did it that way. Some spoke tamil as a native language, and some telagu, so they weren't even from the same part of india.
    If their marriages were fixed when they were born, and they are married now, that must mean it's been at least 20 years since the arrangement. (I'm 17. So, my "long time ago" doesn't go very long back. Pretty much the time before I was born. ). In the recent years, I, personally, haven't heard of this happening anywhere, from my family or friends. But, just because I haven't heard of it, doesn't mean it's not done. So, I can't really tell.

    There happens to be a lot of sections in the Indian society. Some very modern (like those who live in the heart of the metropolitan cities) - almost living the Western lifestyle. The middle class (like my family) who usually hold on to a few customs, but don't follow the really stupid ones (I'm not saying the customs we retain are not stupid. They are just not insanely stupid. :p) Then there are others who still follow the old values and traditions. So, you can't really generalize on any one of them.

    The custom is/was more prevalent in South India, according to me. (My Mom and Dad are from originally from this part. So, I can only tell you as much as I know and have been told.). Tamil is spoken in Tamil Nadu and Telugu in Andhra Pradesh. They are neighboring states (Both of these states fall in South India.) So, your friends are pretty much from the same part of the country.

    Sumit.
  • Profile picture of the author KenThompson
    My friend, Nilay, is from a state toward the north. He said it
    shares a border with Pakistan, I think. I'm not looking at a map,
    so sorry if it doesn't work out. lol.

    Anyway, his parents are pretty traditional. I asked him once if
    his parents could force him to marry someone, and he said he
    retained the right to decline.

    But he also said he would never marry a non-Indian woman. He
    felt the culture gap would be too much. That's the only reason
    he mentioned.

    But he does follow certain practices mainly out of respect for his
    parents. He's a pretty good guy in a lot of ways.

    When we get together to visit, usually over lunch, he'll comment
    on good looking women we see. Then I tease him and offer to
    introduce him to them. He just laughs.

    Ken
  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    Originally Posted by Sumit Menon View Post

    If their marriages were fixed when they were born, and they are married now, that must mean it's been at least 20 years since the arrangement. (I'm 17. So, my "long time ago" doesn't go very long back. Pretty much the time before I was born. ). In the recent years, I, personally, haven't heard of this happening anywhere, from my family or friends. But, just because I haven't heard of it, doesn't mean it's not done. So, I can't really tell.

    There happens to be a lot of sections in the Indian society. Some very modern (like those who live in the heart of the metropolitan cities) - almost living the Western lifestyle. The middle class (like my family) who usually hold on to a few customs, but don't follow the really stupid ones (I'm not saying the customs we retain are not stupid. They are just not insanely stupid. :p) Then there are others who still follow the old values and traditions. So, you can't really generalize on any one of them.

    The custom is/was more prevalent in South India, according to me. (My Mom and Dad are from originally from this part. So, I can only tell you as much as I know and have been told.). Tamil is spoken in Tamil Nadu and Telugu in Andhra Pradesh. They are neighboring states (Both of these states fall in South India.) So, your friends are pretty much from the same part of the country.

    Sumit.
    Yeah, it depends how big you consider a part to be. Still, people that speak only tamil apparently can't be understood by those speaking only telagu. But YEAH, you're right, they are like 25-30 when they get married. Some of that might be because one of them comes to America earlier.

    Steve
  • Profile picture of the author Starring_Emma
    Don't chew with your mouth open and bathe every day.
  • Profile picture of the author leartofly
    Originally Posted by KenThompson View Post

    I assume you're talking about marriage?

    "Will you marry me"?

    That will do the trick and is unambiguous.

    Good luck. Congratulations, in advance. Name your
    first child, Ken.

    Ken
    add one more thing before you shout this question .

    being romantic for at least a week before you ask her
  • Profile picture of the author mcampbell075
    I guess you're question is how to tell your feelings to her?

    Just be yourself, most girls love funny guys who have their sense of humor and most especially sweet man.
    Then you should know those things that makes her happy. Like favorite things. And do a romantic plan that you should know she's gonna like it.
  • Profile picture of the author jeancrook
    be sincere don't fake the girl.
    be confident and be what you are.

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