Goodbye old friend, you will be gone but never forgotten

Dear Yahoo Messenger,

When I first found the Internet, I met you. Fast friends we became. You were my web Yoda. Every day, I would boot up my computer, and you would appear before me, ready to deliver my most important messages to me. You served me well as a buddy and a receptionist, collecting communication for me even if it was the middle of the night, making sure I was appraised of any urgent situation before I began my day and as I sat down with my morning joe.

As the years have gone on, newer and shinier versions of you have been released, and although I had to keep up with the times and use them all, you were still my main method of communication with friends. On lonely nights when I was bored, or craving human contact, you were always there to deliver a private conversation between someone on my buddy list, or someone I met in a chat room somewhere.

I commend you for your efforts to try and keep pace with the youth of the new online crowd, but age is a factor that none of us can escape, and I'm afraid you are simply too advanced to have the spryness and energy of your new competitors. Your latest pacemaker (update) has caused all of your other symptoms to freeze up and become paralyzed for long periods of time. I'm afraid that a stroke which will cause complete paralysis is inevitable, and although I have only visited your competition for business, keeping my oldest and dearest friends with you, I'm afraid I will lose them, along with you, upon your quite imminent demise.

Thank you for your years of stoic dependability and friendship. You will be missed, you will be gone, but I will never forget you.

-Dani