The Strangest Email I've Gotten Lately

Two come to mind that I received in the last couple days.

Someone emailed me that they couldn't find the optin box to get my free report. It's from a squeeze page and the sign up form is front and center on the site.

Then I got someone email me back from one of my emails about list building telling me that's old school and no longer works and to check out so and so site...he then proceeded to send me his affiliate link to something he's promoting. It's like hey now you opted in to my list not the other way around.

I'll admit, about a year ago I laid down a rule for myself about buying domain names while drinking. DON'T.

About a week and a half ago I received an email from a Capt. Scott Wright who is stationed in Iraq and who needs me to receive millions of dollars in oil money for him. Of course, I'll get 20% of the millions for my trouble.

I responded that I was honored that he chose me, out of all the other people he could have contacted, for this most important mission. We have corresponded back and forth and things are coming along well! I told him that my second cousin the United States senator and a team of lawyers have been working hard for him and that we have a private plane ready to fly wherever he needs us and our large security team to go so we can pick up the money and get it safely deposited in a bank account for him.

Oh...

I have signed all of my emails "Umus B. Kideen".

Hey Willie...maybe she thinks your the GURU...and that the $5 was going for your consulting services

Chris Negro

The strangest email I received lately is:-

Dear Art,

Thanks for letting me try your system. I made $1250 in five days working about three hours a day so it does work but i can't give you a recommend because it isn't really internet marketing.

Cheers

I am still trying to work that one out!

This week we got a customer who said, "I'm not sure what I've bought..."

Although we've gone to pains to explain it is a digital product, this customer was also still wondering when/if they would receive a package through their mail box.

It reminded us go back to our sales pages and review the copy, making sure that we've done everything that is practical to inform our customers of what they're buying. I guess the 'odd' one will always slip through.

Customers' decisions don't always make sense, that's because they're only human. There comes a point when there's no more reasoning about it, just move on with the conclusion that some folks' actions are just plain weird.

Peter

For people who are technically savvy and do IM every day it's hard to remember how so confused someone with no, or little, technical knowledge can get.
I remember the first thing I ordered and it freaked me out completely to be asked to download something. I guess I just expected it would magically appear.

Willie - just sounds to me your emailer has only been on the net a few days and actually is confused by the word "link" -- It IS terminology that some people are NOT familiar with the first time they turn on their new computers.

Your technical savvy might have just lost yourself the most dedicated customer you will ever have depending on your answer- because you didn't remember what it is like to not know ANYTHING about being completely new to the Net. Did you explain to her what a "link" is? People can click a lot of links before they learn what the word for that group of letters and characters they just clicked is or how it works.

When I clicked on this machine for the first time the only thing I had ever done before was word processing. I had no idea what a link was. Fortunately I learn fast enough that problem was resolved in a few minutes - but for some it takes longer. The point is - I clicked a lot of links before I knew I was clicking a link.

You have no clue - or don't remember your own experiences - how frustrating it was for me to buy a product that said "No technical skill needed" just to find the "how to's" so loaded down with terminology etc, that I couldn't understand the first word of it. I didn't even take advantage of a few free scripts I was given by some great warriors when I was new here, because I couldn't figure out what to do with them. (But thanks to those who so kindly attempted to help me start out).

My technology issues are much more advanced now - but still the same old frustrations - people with no memory of not knowing the issue trying to explain it to someone who's never seen the issue before. They just can't break it back down to the get go because it's too ingrained.

One of our jobs as marketers is to remember that we can't assume that someone will know what we are saying just because it comes natural to us. It didn't always. Take some time to look back at the first time you ever studied anything computer related or sat at a keyboard for the first time. And write from that point of view, or as close as you can get to it, if you are advertising the product is for non-techies.

A few of you have some very genuine weirdness (and scammy) emails mentioned in here - but a few of you are just too tech savvy to realize that if you get someone completely new to computers stumbling on and buying your product - you are going to get some strange problems arising even when dealing with intelligent life forms who just haven't been around the Net long enough to "get it" yet.