Why the universe could be about to collapse on us.

10 years ago

I would think that even "sooner than we think" is long enough for none of us here to actually put it on the "doom and gloom worry list" huh?

Might be a good time to start selling doppler equip and tell the doomsday crowd to watch daily for the shift to turn from red to blue and when it does, they can start the "we're all gonna die" parties. LMAO - that should keep em busy for awhile.

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Sal
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Dennis Gaskill

10 years ago

Sooner or later a radical shift in the forces of the universe will cause every little particle in it to become extremely heavy.

What will cause this radical shift? What exactly is this radical shift?

Oh, it's a theory.

If you buy my Universe Anti-Collapse insurance you won't have to worry about the universe collapsing. And if it does, you will not only collect on the insurance policy, but I'll refund every single one of your monthly premiums.

At only $5 a month, it's insurance you can't afford to be without.

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HeySal

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill

What will cause this radical shift? What exactly is this radical shift?

Oh, it's a theory.

If you buy my Universe Anti-Collapse insurance you won't have to worry about the universe collapsing. And if it does, you will not only collect on the insurance policy, but I'll refund every single one of your monthly premiums.

At only $5 a month, it's insurance you can't afford to be without.

I'm sorry, Dennis. Your insurance seems to cover only one of the 4 theories (3?) of how the universe will end. It's just not comprehensive enough for me. Do you have an umbrella "Absolute Doomsday" policy we could look at instead?

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Sal
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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

quantum physics

Come one, come all, folks. Need a "scientific sounding word" to give your harebrained idea credibility? Just say "quantum physics".

Don't have a compelling argument, and are you stuck babbling incoherently? Just bring out "quantum physics".

Yes, by saying the words "quantum physics", your friends will no longer laugh at your screwy ideas. Suddenly, they will say "Hmmmm, he did say quantum physics...there must be something to this idea.

Remember folks...just say quantum physics, and all your hallucinations will sound credible.

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Devin X

Banned 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

quantum physics

Come one, come all, folks. Need a "scientific sounding word" to give your harebrained idea credibility? Just say "quantum physics".

Don't have a compelling argument, and stuck babbling incoherently? Just bring out "quantum physics".

Yes, by saying the words "quantum physics", your friends will no longer laugh at your screwy ideas. Suddenly, they will say "Hmmmm, he did say quantum physics...there must be something to this idea.

Remember folks...just say quantum physics, and all your hallucinations will sound credible.

That's so terribly pathetic but so terribly true. I've seen it happen many places, as I'm sure you have too. I HATE how those two words have been used to justify the most backwards ideas ever conceived by new-age hippies.

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HeySal

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

quantum physics

Come one, come all, folks. Need a "scientific sounding word" to give your harebrained idea credibility? Just say "quantum physics".

Don't have a compelling argument, and are you stuck babbling incoherently? Just bring out "quantum physics".

Yes, by saying the words "quantum physics", your friends will no longer laugh at your screwy ideas. Suddenly, they will say "Hmmmm, he did say quantum physics...there must be something to this idea.

Remember folks...just say quantum physics, and all your hallucinations will sound credible.

Would you be more comfy if we said "Astronomy"? This one fits.

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thunderbird

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

quantum physics

Come one, come all, folks. Need a "scientific sounding word" to give your harebrained idea credibility? Just say "quantum physics".

Don't have a compelling argument, and are you stuck babbling incoherently? Just bring out "quantum physics".

Yes, by saying the words "quantum physics", your friends will no longer laugh at your screwy ideas. Suddenly, they will say "Hmmmm, he did say quantum physics...there must be something to this idea.

Remember folks...just say quantum physics, and all your hallucinations will sound credible.

The other way to sound faux clever (and impress I don't know who) is to say "As Einstein said..." followed by words that don't resemble anything he ever said.

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Horny Devil Banned 10 years ago

Every second counts. Best stick with the eggs done sunny side up rather than over-easy, until this blows over.
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Dennis Gaskill

10 years ago

Originally Posted by thunderbird

The other way to sound faux clever (and impress I don't know who) is to say "As Einstein said..." followed by words that don't resemble anything he ever said.

Oh, this thread just keeps getting betterer and betterer. Let me use your faux clever with Claudes and see how I do now...

So, um, as Einstein said, let's have some quantum physics on toast.

Yeah baby, I'm feeling smarterer already.

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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill

Oh, this thread just keeps getting betterer and betterer. Let me use your faux clever with Claudes and see how I do now...

So, um, as Einstein said, let's have some quantum physics on toast.

Yeah baby, I'm feeling smarterer already.

Yeah, I agree that.... Hey! What do you mean "Faux clever"?

My cleverness has been documented by the same people that declared that four out of five dentists recommend that you brush your teeth. :rolleyes:

And Where The Hell Is Riffle!!!????

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Dan Riffle 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

And Where The Hell Is Riffle!!!????

Lurking in the shadows, waiting to pounce.
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Dennis Gaskill

10 years ago

Originally Posted by David Braybrooke

Gawd, what a thread. Total hijack job!

I'll just take the insurance Mr G. Does it cover pets too?

Sorry, but I knew if I didn't lighten the heavy doom some of my OT pals would be a stewin' and frettin' all night and wouldn't be able to sleep. I probably saved a lot of lives.

Besides, this is the OT. Thread hijacking is an art form down here.

Pets...yeah, sure. I won't even charge you extra since you started the thread.

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

Yeah, I agree that.... Hey! What do you mean "Faux clever"?

My cleverness has been documented by the same people that declared that four out of five dentists recommend that you brush your teeth. :rolleyes:

Seriously? I didn't even know 4 out of 5 dentists knew me! Being famous is crazy!!

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dave147

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill

If you buy my Universe Anti-Collapse insurance you won't have to worry about the universe collapsing. And if it does, you will not only collect on the insurance policy, but I'll refund every single one of your monthly premiums.

At only $5 a month, it's insurance you can't afford to be without.

Originally Posted by HeySal

I'm sorry, Dennis. Your insurance seems to cover only one of the 4 theories (3?) of how the universe will end. It's just not comprehensive enough for me. Do you have an umbrella "Absolute Doomsday" policy we could look at instead?

His other policies are upsells. His anti-collapse insurance policy is to get his foot-in-the-door, to build trust, then he will upsell you on the "Absolute Doomsday" policy
this one will be more than $5 a month, but well worth it though

Great policy Dennis, can I pay you in Bitcoins?

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tagiscom

10 years ago

Groan, not more of this crap!

Global warming was bad enough, now we will have the eternal argument whether we will be compressed and fried or not?

I tend to think that the universe is eternal, although l am not discounting a beginning.

And it constantly expands and contracts over 312 million years, last point of maximum expansion was roughly new years eve, 2012.

And since our brains can't handle infinity, we shy away from it, to come up with other ideas, including this nonsense.

Infinity is just space time curved around to give the impression of continual flow, or reality is curved!

A circular path is infinite, so it isn't that big a thing to get your head around! :rolleyes:

And particles going faster than light-speed may be going at right angles to 3 dimensional space, time cube, but that is just a theory!

See Claude didn't use the Quantum Theory word at all! He, he!

Shane

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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

Originally Posted by tagiscom

I tend to think that the universe is eternal, although l am not discounting a beginning.

And it constantly expands and contracts over 312 million years, last point of maximum expansion was roughly new years eve, 2012.

Ummm really? Are you saying that The Universe stopped expanding (meaning our universe) on New Years eve, 2012? Did you know that the universe is huge? And galaxies flying away from each other at millions of miles an hour...all reversed course....at one time...on New Year's Eve...Did you know that our year has nothing to do with the trillions of suns in the billions of galaxies? But everything stopped expanding ...on New Years Eve....? Muuhhhuuhhaaahaa We need to notify every astrophysicist. This is HUGE.

Originally Posted by tagiscom

And since our brains can't handle infinity, we shy away from it, to come up with other ideas, including this nonsense.

Our brains can't handle infinity? We invented the term. We gave it meaning. The whole concept was invented by us.

The second law of thermodynamics..as said by Albert Einstein... is that if you cannot invent a concept and then say that you don't understand what it means.

Oh, and Merry Quantum Physics.

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tagiscom

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

Ummm really? Are you saying that The Universe stopped expanding (meaning our universe) on New Years eve, 2012? Did you know that the universe is huge? And galaxies flying away from each other at millions of miles an hour...all reversed course....at one time...on New Year's Eve...Did you know that our year has nothing to do with the trillions of suns in the billions of galaxies? But everything stopped expanding ...on New Years Eve....? Muuhhhuuhhaaahaa We need to notify every astrophysicist. This is HUGE.

Our brains can't handle infinity? We invented the term. We gave it meaning. The whole concept was invented by us.

The second law of thermodynamics..as said by Albert Einstein... is that if you cannot invent a concept and then say that you don't understand what it means.

Oh, and Merry Quantum Physics.

This is getting into what mystics believe, and what l sensed!

But l won't get into that, but that is what l believe!

No, what l am saying is ask someone to imagine infinity, it can't be done, our minds have kittens!

But our minds can handle space, time being curved, or a three dimensional space time environment being warped by a 4 dimensional form, (for want of a better word) that gives the illusion of infinity but it really isn't!

Shane

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Claude Whitacre 10 years ago

Originally Posted by tagiscom

This is getting into what mystics believe, and what l sensed!

Forgive me.
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- DJL 10 years ago
  
  Actually, this was first propounded at the
  South Hampton Institute of Technology.
  
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  None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
  --Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Elective Affinities (1809)
  
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  HeySal 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by DJL
  
  Actually, this was first propounded at the
  South Hampton Institute of Technology.
  
  Jeez what genius missed that one. LOL. That's really unfortunate for the school store. They usually make a bundle from the tee-shirts.
  
  Claude - I agree. We CAN imagine infinity in the form of our own immortality -- it's the end of existence that we don't seem to be able to handle.
  
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Dennis Gaskill 10 years ago

Originally Posted by dave147

Great policy Dennis, can I pay you in Bitcoins?

Sure, that's probably the only way I'd get into Bitcoins at this point.
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eXacta

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill

What will cause this radical shift? What exactly is this radical shift?

Oh, it's a theory.

If you buy my Universe Anti-Collapse insurance you won't have to worry about the universe collapsing. And if it does, you will not only collect on the insurance policy, but I'll refund every single one of your monthly premiums.

At only $5 a month, it's insurance you can't afford to be without.

Hey Dennis, does you have an affiliate program? :p

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Dennis Gaskill

10 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

I'm sorry, Dennis. Your insurance seems to cover only one of the 4 theories (3?) of how the universe will end. It's just not comprehensive enough for me. Do you have an umbrella "Absolute Doomsday" policy we could look at instead?

Anything for you, Sal. The umbrella coverage not only covers all that, but it covers any theory propounded before the universe collapses, explodes, inverts itself, fades away, disappears into a black hole, or wears out.

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

quantum physics

Come one, come all, folks. Need a "scientific sounding word" to give your harebrained idea credibility? Just say "quantum physics".

Don't have a compelling argument, and are you stuck babbling incoherently? Just bring out "quantum physics".

Yes, by saying the words "quantum physics", your friends will no longer laugh at your screwy ideas. Suddenly, they will say "Hmmmm, he did say quantum physics...there must be something to this idea.

Remember folks...just say quantum physics, and all your hallucinations will sound credible.

That must be the most brilliant post ever ... he said "quantum physics" six whole times. I love these scientific discussions. Especially the ones where I learn how to sound smart. Let me try!

Yeah, I got up early and had quantum physics on toast.

Did I do good? Do I sound smart now?

Originally Posted by eXacta

Hey Dennis, does you have an affiliate program? :p

Yes, but it's only available to policy holders. Would you like to sign up today? I can give you a 20% discount if you sign up before noon yesterday.

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HeySal

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill

That must be the most brilliant post ever ... he said "quantum physics" six whole times. I love these scientific discussions. Especially the ones where I learn how to sound smart. Let me try!

Yeah, I got up early and had quantum physics on toast.

Did I do good? Do I sound smart now?

Sounds like you're getting your quota of fiber at any count.

Edit: Oh come on people - that was funny. Think about it. This is one tough room.

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David Braybrooke

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill

What will cause this radical shift? What exactly is this radical shift?

Oh, it's a theory.

If you buy my Universe Anti-Collapse insurance you won't have to worry about the universe collapsing. And if it does, you will not only collect on the insurance policy, but I'll refund every single one of your monthly premiums.

At only $5 a month, it's insurance you can't afford to be without.

Gawd, what a thread. Total hijack job!

I'll just take the insurance Mr G. Does it cover pets too?

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David Braybrooke

10 years ago

I used 'quantum physics' as the OP to describe the subatomic tutoring I endured in secondary school. The science subject was clearly titled just that!

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Kay King 10 years ago

I agree with the very end of the article....

PHEW
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Claude Whitacre 10 years ago

Originally Posted by David Braybrooke

I used 'quantum physics' as the OP to describe the subatomic tutoring I endured in secondary school. The science subject was clearly titled just that!

David; It wasn't directed at you. But I see how you would get that idea. Sorry.
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Sarevok

10 years ago

At last... Oblivion.

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David Maschke

10 years ago

I find the cold, dark, black hole, which my ex-girlfriend refers to as her heart, to be much more frightening. A part of my soul is in there somewhere.

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Dan Riffle 10 years ago

Originally Posted by David Maschke

I find the cold, dark, black hole, which my ex-girlfriend refers to as her heart, to be much more frightening. A part of my soul is in there somewhere.

Hey, David, look at the bright side: when all the particles get heavy and collapse, she's basically gonna get fat and die.

Bright sides, my friend, bright sides.
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- Richard Van 10 years ago
  
  If this happens, will Ice Road Truckers still be on?
  
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  Wibble, bark, my old man's a mushroom etc...
  
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  yukon Banned 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Richard Van
  
  If this happens, will Ice Road Truckers still be on?
  
  See, someone gets it.
  
  Priorities people...
  
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yukon

Banned 10 years ago

Global Warming 2.0

Panic first then blame other people...

10 Hours - Crickets in Field (Relaxing Ambient...

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Tim3

10 years ago

Spammers will find a way around it

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Riggs

10 years ago

So it could be happening right now, might happen in the future, or wont happen at all. Thank you to the Daily Mail and the scientists at the University of Southern Denmark, for broadly explaining what we all know already.

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HeySal

10 years ago

Well, of course, it was all a mistake -- and it all started from that time Einstein was heard to have said (:rolleyes

"Who the F*** erased my chalkboard?"

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Michael Ten

10 years ago

I think that it is unlikely that The Universe will collapse.

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David Braybrooke 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Michael Ten

I think that it is unlikely that The Universe will collapse.

And the Titanic wasn't going to sink either. I'd still be getting that insurance Michael!
What happens if the universe ends while I am baking the Christmas Turkey? All that wasted effort!
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Why the universe could be about to collapse on us.

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