The Weirdest Job You've Ever Had?

10 years ago

No strange but probably the lowest point of my life. It was just before I got into IM. It was sometime between 2000 and 2002 but I don't remember exactly when.

I was working in this big kind of like warehouse sticking labels on law briefs that were going to be used for court. Each label was numbered and it had to match the number of the brief. I started at something like 4 and finished at midnight. I did this for 2 weeks.

Just thinking about it. Yeah, that bad.

Never again. I'd rather put a gun to my head and end it all.

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Claude Whitacre 10 years ago

I worked in the autopsy room in a large hospital. It was sureal. I was maybe 21 years old.
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- lanfear63 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre
  
  I worked in the autopsy room in a large hospital. It was sureal. I was maybe 21 years old.
  
  That's where they did the autopsy on Salvador Dali. No wonder.
  
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  Claude Whitacre 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by lanfear63
  
  That's where they did the autopsy on Salvador Dali. No wonder.
  
  I get it. Pretty clever.
  
  Originally Posted by HeySal
  
  I've had some pretty bad jobs -- but never anything weird. Wish I could be more exciting.
  
  I have a few suggestions, but you'll hit me.
  
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lanfear63

10 years ago

I tried to make money working as an Internet Marketeer once. That turned out to be just a plain silly idea for a profession.

Just look in the Wooster Ohio Gazette, that's where the really crazy ones are.

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Magaver90

10 years ago

Originally Posted by lanfear63

I tried to make money working as an Internet Marketeer once. That turned out to be just a plain silly idea for a profession.
.

You want to be careful what you say about internet marketing being silly as a profession. There are many people on this forum including myself who run online businesses that generate more income than a decent paying 9-5 job. So no, its not a silly profession.

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lanfear63

10 years ago

Originally Posted by stv105

You want to be careful what you say about internet marketing being silly as a profession. There are many people on this forum including myself who run online businesses that generate more income than a decent paying 9-5 job. So no, its not a silly profession.

Its called satire, I think your in the wrong section of the forum.

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Magaver90 10 years ago

Originally Posted by lanfear63

Its called satire, I think your in the wrong section of the forum.

I think you're on the wrong forum.
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- lanfear63 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by stv105
  
  I think you're on the wrong forum.
  
  Now your getting it!
  
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Dan White

10 years ago

Originally Posted by stv105

You want to be careful what you say about internet marketing being silly as a profession. There are many people on this forum including myself who run online businesses that generate more income than a decent paying 9-5 job. So no, its not a silly profession.

Originally Posted by lanfear63

Its called satire, I think your in the wrong section of the forum.

what can I say

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David Beroff

10 years ago

I transported human eyeballs. (No, I'm not talking about advertising impressions.) They typically had to be delivered at 4 or 5 in the morning, which is also when the transplant recipient would get there to check in for surgery, so I sometimes had the surreal chat with them of, "yup, I have your new eyes right here in this little box!"

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Kurt

10 years ago

The job itself wasn't weird, but driving a cab had its strange moments...

Originally Posted by David Beroff

I transported human eyeballs. (No, I'm not talking about advertising impressions.) They typically had to be delivered at 4 or 5 in the morning, which is also when the transplant recipient would get there to check in for surgery, so I sometimes had the surreal chat with them of, "yup, I have your new eyes right here in this little box!"

As a cab driver, I've delivered corneas , kidneys, blood, helicopter wheels, transvestites, and more...

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lanfear63

10 years ago

Originally Posted by Kurt

The job itself wasn't weird, but driving a cab had its strange moments...

As a cab driver, I've delivered corneas , kidneys, blood, helicopter wheels, transvestites, and more...

You drove Claude in your cab?

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Kurt 10 years ago

Originally Posted by lanfear63

You drove Claude in your cab?

Yeah, but I made him ride in the trunk. His fishnets always clashed with his mascara.
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HeySal

10 years ago

I've had some pretty bad jobs -- but never anything weird. Wish I could be more exciting.

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bizgrower

10 years ago

I used to be a courier.

I picked up and delivered human and animal body parts (rabies testing), tissue, blood and blood samples...

Mostly it's just another box. One time the Igloo type cooler of human body parts
was slightly open and that was a little creepy.

Another time I had to pick up and deliver a blood sample for testing and was told
by the lab manager that it literally was a matter of life and death and I could have
no other stops.

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Dennis Gaskill

10 years ago

Originally Posted by bizgrower

I used to be a courier.

I picked up and delivered human and animal body parts (rabies testing), tissue, blood and blood samples...

Mostly it's just another box. One time the Igloo type cooler of human body parts
was slightly open and that was a little creepy.

Another time I had to pick up and deliver a blood sample for testing and was told
by the lab manager that it literally was a matter of life and death and I could have
no other stops.

Hey Dan, aren't you supposed to post some creepy background music when you write about things like that?

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laurencewins

10 years ago

Same as Kurt, I used to be a cabbie and I also drove all sorts of medical things. I remember having to transport an artificial leg once. But there were lots of small eskies with body parts and bloods, etc in them that went form pathologies to hospitals.

Another job that some may think weird... I used to do singing telegrams. I dressed up as a gorilla, a chook (for hens' nights,) a fairy in a pink wig and a tutu and a few other costumes. I also played Santa a few times on Christmas day. One year it was around 40 degrees and I had 4 Santa grams to do.... man that was a HOT day!

I had people say to me that I should feel silly and I simply said they must be silly coz they are paying me the big bucks to do it.

The money was all cash back then as well... I used to earn great money for the hours I worked.

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hardraysnight

10 years ago

steaming mussels, later used it for a band name

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thunderbird

10 years ago

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Claude Whitacre 10 years ago

I can't believe I forgot this.

I went to Florida when I was 18 or 19 years old. I ran into a woman that wanted to hire me as her escort. This is a true story.

I spent the day with her, mostly shopping, we went to the beach (she was maybe 35, and very attractive). In the evening, we went shopping...again, and she bought me some new clothes (Nothing I would ever wear, on a bet).

And yep, um.....well......you know....escort things happened.

I left in the early morning...without getting paid, and without waking her up, and vowed never to do anything like that again. I didn't think of it as a job, because it wasn't a company, and it was only for one day.

The part that was unpleasant, was that she treated me like a pet. She made every decision that day, and night. And, although she was attractive, I really didn't like her.

I spent the next week, hiking the length of the eastern coastline...got a bad case of sun poisoning, and took the bus home. Yea.

I found out years later that she had a son by me......Dan Riffle.

(OK, the Riffle part was a joke. But the rest was true)
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Dan Riffle

10 years ago

So, basically you're trying to tell us that you once slept with a blind woman.

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Claude Whitacre 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Dan Riffle

So, basically you're trying to tell us that you once slept with a blind woman.

I'm just trying to convince you all that I've slept with any woman.
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- lanfear63 10 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre
  
  I'm just trying to convince you all that I've slept with any woman.
  
  I can't wait for your next book: One Day Hooking
  
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AndreaBlom

10 years ago

Wow! Reading all your replies was hilarious! Transporting eyeballs, those cab driver stories and Claude...just wow haha!

That was a great start to my Saturday.

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bizgrower

10 years ago

Um, Claude, what is meant by "escort things happened"?

I think your post needs the scary music Dennis referred to.

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Claude Whitacre 10 years ago

Originally Posted by bizgrower

Um, Claude, what is meant by "escort things happened"?

I think your post needs the scary music Dennis referred to.

Train and tunnel - YouTube
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bizgrower

10 years ago

Originally Posted by bizgrower

Um, Claude, what is meant by "escort things happened"?

I think your post needs the scary music Dennis referred to.

(Because the lady sounds scary.)

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Claude Whitacre

10 years ago

Originally Posted by bizgrower

(Because the lady sounds scary.)

This was a looong time ago, but I remember that she was so impersonal. she talked at me, but not to me. She would say things like "Now, we are going to the beach" and "We're going to grab a bite, and then we are going shopping".

She wasn't scary. But there was nothing pleasant about her. Although she was um....vigorous. And I was so young and stupid, I didn't get paid up front.

I told my Mom and Dad about it over dinner one night, probably 20 years later. My Dad thought it was hilarious.

Originally Posted by yukon

A Chinese restaurant, I was 16 years old. The manager/owner got pissed off at me for throwing the food on the dirty dishes in the trash.
.

I worked as a bus boy at Tangiers restaurant in Akron, a very high end place at the time. I was 18, I think. I saw another guy get yelled at, because he was going to throw away a steak that fell on the floor. The manager, made him put it back on the plate, after he rinsed it off.

Originally Posted by lanfear63

I can't wait for your next book: One Day Hooking

Clever, but I bet a book titled One Day Seduction would sell.

By the way, the reason I went to Florida, is because I watched Midnight Cowboy, and had the brilliant idea that I could make money that way. My plan consisted of;
1) Go to Florida (No idea why I picked Florida)
2) Women give you lots of money.

There was nothing between 1 and 2. I had no clue how any of it worked. My future was based on one movie I saw. I'm just glad the movie I saw wasn't Batman....or I would have gone to Florida to be Batman.

Claude The Moron.

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yukon

Banned 10 years ago

Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre

I worked as a bus boy at Tangiers restaurant in Akron, a very high end place at the time. I was 18, I think. I saw another guy get yelled at, because he was going to throw away a steak that fell on the floor. The manager, made him put it back on the plate, after he rinsed it off.

3 second rule!

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Dynamo88

10 years ago

Got paid to look after a large mansion in the Cotswolds 'United Kingdom' for 14 months while the owners were travelling the world.

No real work required just collecting the post and keeping 50% of the house tidy, as the other half was undergoing construction.