Article writing - am I so obscure?

Hi Art,

One possible reason for your difficulties is the prism you've set up through which people read your posts. Specifically:

Under your name there's the line, "Brutal honesty's me"

And your sig says, "You might not like what I say - but I believe it."


You can see how those lines might affect how people perceive your posts.

cheers,
Becky

I guess you find yourself with a decision to make to the question of:

What do I want from my participation here?

Do you want to be understood, liked, respected and responded to?
Or do you want to be authentic, who you are - like it or leave it?

I'm an "authenticity" type of person myself. BUT (and this is a HUGE BUT) I am not the only person in the whole wide world who does what I do, and (to some extent) knows what I know. If I want to get PAID for what I do and what I know, I *HAVE* to meet people where THEY are at. Speak with them the way THEY understand and communicate. *OR* do it my way and be ok with losing people along the way because of the issues you bring to light.

This is true whether I want to make money, or be understood, liked, respected and responded to. However, you never really know who you are "speaking" to in these online forums. Not everyone who reads them, makes public appearances. I have found that lots of people may understand, like and respect you - just do so quietly. Maybe "quietly" doesn't get you what you want - if not then conforming may be needed - or if conforming is out of the question, changing what you want may be what is needed.

Respectfully,

Nancy Roebke

That is not a simple question.

Here's brutal honesty - I can't speak for everyone of course, but I don't come here to experience literary perfection and I don't take the time to attempt to understand the subtle nuances of a post that exhibits an ease of facility with the language and is crafted from a wide vocabulary. If it takes work to read, I don't read it.

My time is limited. I don't want fluff, I don't want artful prose. Say your piece and be done with it.

For the casual reader, yes, you are.

You have to develop your command of the English language to a degree that you can employ brevity when required.

People like to discuss, not argue. Your 'brutal honesty' is not another's. It's merely your brutal opinion. You may believe it passionately, and it may even be true. Then again, you could be arguing the case of a flat earth. If I feel there's no room in your mind to consider a conflicting opinion, I won't engage you. I don't like talking to a wall.

Art, uh....you know me as a friend, so don't take offense, but your sentence structure is not always that clear. There are often many ambiguities in it. I have always assumed that English is not your native language. Your vocabulary is exemplary - but your sentence structures and occasional juxtaposed or absence of referents make it difficult to process some of your thoughts. It often looks as if you are mixing English sentence construction with that of German.

I will also use your signature as an example:

You might not like what I say - but I believe it "but" is a conjunction giving equal sentence structure status to both the preceding and following independent clauses. When you say I believe "it" - that pronoun lacks referent and when one is inferred, it actually refers back to the independent clause in the first half - "you" rather than to the following subordinate clause "what I say" - because of the nature of the linking conjunction which semantically equalizes each independent clause but does not touch the subordinate clauses. While we can understand what you were trying to say (it's not that obscure in this sentence) you make us work a bit to do so. The eye stops and the brain engages. The more often someone's eye stops and they must process info instead of just taking it in as a feed, the less understood you will be........and even the less credible.

I haven't read your sales pages, but if you are missing referents or miss-linking pronouns often, you will lose credibility - not your fault, it's a subconscious thing.

It is important to realize that structure is every bit as important to communication as words are at both the conscious and the subconscious levels.

Hi, Sal,

A fascinating analysis.

My signature was originally "You might not like what I believe" but the semantic police in another forum decided that it was too challenging.

My sentence structure is based upon a simple desire to state, qualify and define rather than to state, simplify and obfuscate. Unfortunately precision is not often appreciated when the vernier scales are not understood.

I don't write sales letters or sales pages because I simply do not have a facility with that sort of language. Redundant verbiage and surplus superlatives always leave me cold.

It would appear that I have to watch more TV and absorb some of the modern approaches to linguistics - although I dread to think how my talks and lectures would come across if they influenced the way I speak.

"The eye stops and the brain engages" - a wonderful concept and probably the reason I cannot understand why my written work seems so obscure. I tend to hope that brains are engaged before the eye starts scanning - foolish of me, it seems.

in a forum like this i like to be crisp and clear. i think as other posters have suggested that people are skimming and just want quick and concise advice.

i'm always impressed with folks who have a large vocabulary. but you have to think of your audience. i've often found that i can understand more by what was not said than what was said, especially if the writer dazzles with a smoke screen of large words.

as a writer, i'm always trying to keep it simple and concise. i think that is the best policy,

jason

Um...Art? Precision does not include syntax errors. Faulty referent modification is an error of SYNTAX - and yes, such an error makes a sentence hard to understand. Semantic police eh? Are you sure they aren't structural police? If you insist on perfection and erudite phraseology - "You might not like what I believe" should be "You might not like that which I believe". Don't think of me as a language "police" just recognize my credentialed expertise in the genre.

Really guy - Language is not a stagnant entity - it is flows and morphs with the culture in which it serves as communication base - IT CAN NOT BE SEPARATED FROM THE CULTURE with any effectiveness. It is instinctual and a sociologically relevant communication base. If you insist on speaking in extreme formal register in an informal reader environment - you are going to be misunderstood on a psychological or sociological level.

Believe it or not - some of the smartest people I have ever met couldn't correctly structure a sentence to save their own lives. They are usually physicists. Mathematical geniuses do not comprehend normal conversational structures at all - the have no sense of frame and insert. Language is instinctual and if they can be geniuses and mess up an instinctual ability what does that say for the rest of the population?
So be very careful who you call ignorant for not understanding your erudite diction.

Language has morphed quite some bit since Simon wrote his dictates on perfect diction. Linguistic pomposity isn't going to get you very far. Formalized diction can be laborious and dry, thoroughly boring. If you pride yourself as a wordmaster you will recognize that it is your job as speaker or writer to reach your audiance - not visa versa. If you pride your language ability so highly and are so thoroughly disgusted with what you see in sales letters...........then do it better. Simply put........find a means to do it better. You'd be surprised what people can understand if you can get them interested enough to stick around and pay attention.

"You might not like what I believe" should be "You might not like that which I believe"

I keep forgetting that we don't speak the same language!

I do accept your point about the fluid state of language, especially in the written form when it is presented by my children and grandchildren.

For example - gr8 2 ear fm u - bin torry mkt - bt lots - txt l8r - ma eb 4 auel 6 -

This loosely translates to - Great to hear from you. We've been to Torringtoin market and bought what we needed - will text later - Mother is looking for the final Jean Auel book.

I had to telephone to get some of it translated - they lost me after 'fm u'!

Maybe I should become a Dodo?