How to make it BIG online (CLOSED)

[The Copy Nazi]

how to make it
BIG
online

How? Well it's a no-brainer isn't it - you need to convince people to buy your sh*t. Simple as that.

And how do you do that? With words. Beautiful words and phrases. Served up on paper or marinated in a video.

Who's gonna write the bloody things? I am. I am your go-to guy for fresh words. Words that convince people to part with their money.

Now get this...this is the part that will have you pressing the Buy Button before I change my mind and go back to being a miserable Copy Nazi.

I'm not going to charge you $10,000 a copy gig.

Scroll to the bottom if you can't be arsed reading any more and you'll find the price.

Otherwise come for a walk down memory lane and read this WSO that first saw the light of day on the 15th of January 2010 - almost 2 years ago.

And as you can see...people dig it. And they think me a genius and the nicest nazi in the whole wide world.

Oh yeah - since this WSO I've had several big-hitters on Clickbank, Plimus and elsewhere. Numero Unos. Million Dollar launches.

The copy below was last updated in March. But its still relevant. And to be honest I couldn't be frigged rewriting it. It converts.

But before we go there...let's have a little fun. A newbie copywriter posted his portfolio on the copy sub forum for critique. Including his cheesy radio spot for a meat promo at a food market -

You leave work. You’re in your car, unwinding while thinking about who’s being voted off your favorite TV show tonight. Then you realize you have to make dinner for the family…and your kitchen shelves are emptier than Old Mother Hubbard’s cupboards after a weekend visit from her grandkids.
You speed to the nearest supermarket and fling the first package of beef you see into your shopping cart.
Big mistake. The beef is lean. It’s dry. It’s chewier than gum, but not as fun because you can’t blow bubbles with it.
Shoulda went to Busch’s Fresh Food Market. They sell only USDA Choice and Premium beef. That means that, no matter which package of beef you throw in your cart, it’s going to be tender and juicy.
If you’re feeling extra healthy, try Busch’s Open Prairie Natural Angus. It’s 100% antibiotic- and hormone-free, and it comes from livestock that’s fed an all-vegetarian diet.
And if you’re a pork person, try Busch’s All Natural pork. It’s minimally processed and contains no added salt or water. So you get lots of taste without the extra – uh, let’s call it “weird stuff” – that some retailers put in their pork.
Busch’s Fresh Food Market: Choose your meat wisely.

The O.P. came back and explained the first spot he wrote was rejected by the client as being "too sadistic" - he had a cow and a pig talking about how they were on the menu that night. So I took that concept and did this with it -

Busch's Premium Meat 30" Radio Spot

sfx under: Barnyard noises.

The Cow (deep voice): hey Pig - how they hangin'?

The Pig (squeaky voice): oh hi Beef.

The Cow: you know they're gonna zap me with the electric cattle prod today?

The Pig: no kidding? Will that be fun?

The Cow: oh yeah - I can't wait. Then they're gonna slice me up into thick juicy steaks and make gourmet sausages out of me.

The Pig: yeah?

The Cow: yeah...I'm part of the Premium Meat Promo at Busch's this week. What about you Dude?

The Pig: I get to have my throat slit. Then they're gonna fry my ass with some eggs.

The Cow: getouttahere! Give me the electric cattle prod any day.

V.O.: Busch's Premium Meats - "meat to die for"

Normal programming resumes -

They say bad luck comes in threes.

Mine went like this.

Took my children to the D-Day landing beaches couple of weeks ago - specifically "Omaha Beach" Normandy, France. Remember the horrific opening scenes from "Saving Private Ryan"?

It was drizzling rain and I slipped on the clay track coming down from the German gun emplacements - seen in the background here. Gave the back of my head a hell of a whack, wrenched my back and cracked some ribs.

I had my HD video camera in one hand and my 6 year old boy in the other. Hurt like hell and I was in Disneyland for awhile. My ribs still hurt.

That was #1 piece of bad luck.

Second lot of bad luck was I went to the dentist for a check-up and he found one of my molars was wobbly. An x-ray showed it had broken at the root and had to come out and be replaced with an implant.

"That will be €2000 please". Ouch.

Number 3? Not really bad luck. Just inconvenient. Friday I had an operation on my right hand for Carpal Tunnel Syndrome - my fingers have been going numb after long typing sessions. I'm bandaged up and typing this using the voice recognition software "Dragon Dictate" - for Mac.

What's this got to do with anything? It's put me behind in my work. I currently have five Clickbank pages in various stages of undress. Hope to get at least three of them fully clothed this week.

So why the hell am I advertising for new clients on the WSO section? Especially since I have a couple of projects of my own on the boil as well (see the sig).

Why Malkie why?

I guess I like to be busy. I also like to keep my name out there so people know I'm alive and kicking and haven't fallen down some German bunker and broken my bloody neck.

BTW - nothing to do with copywriting but check out this 6-part British series on the D-Day landings at Omaha Beach. From Richard Hammond of "Top Gear" fame. They're now saying that 5000 American soldiers died on that beach. And they've just recently uncovered a massive German gun emplacement about 3 miles west of Omaha Beach.

YouTube - Richard Hammond presents Bloody...

Now where were we? Oh yes - Copy. Does my copy convert?

I get that question all the time.

This landing page copy for a $497 Clickbank product launched on a webinar a few weeks back converted at 25%. And yes, it cost the client the price of this WSO. Peanuts. So I'm going to have to rethink these offers. I'll probably start pitching them at $1500 upfront and 10% of the backend. But for now I'll keep this offer as it stands. Lock it in or miss out.

I picked up two new clients yesterday (March 7) and one of them blew my mind. He said -

I'm just sitting here, trying to decide if I should give the whole "selling my own product" thing one more try, with some decent copy. I've been inspired by your WSO.

It wasn't the comment that blew my mind but what this guy is doing. He's netting $50k a month from his sites! Do the math on that. He's under-the-radar but now wants to show others how he's doing it. Unreal eh? How exciting is this going to be both to write and to pitch. Showed me all his stats and sites. I ran the main one through Market Samurai and as I suspected it shows 105,000 backlinks.

Know what I try to keep in mind when writing copy? Especially IM copy? This quote -

People will do anything for those who encourage their dreams, justify their failures, allay their fears, confirm their suspicions and help them throw rocks at their enemies.

It's from here - The One Sentence Persuasion Course

So with that in mind...read on MacDuff...


What's the most important thing in Internet Marketing?

Yeah your "List" is important - and that seems to be the "flavor-of-the-month" at the moment. And your JV partnerships can make or break a campaign. Your Product - your Offer - is vitally important - having exactly what people want. And yeah - Traffic is important and your pricepoint is important and a bunch of other stuff comes into the mix too.

But the one thing you must get right if you're going to succeed in this game is THE WRITING. None of that other stuff is worth a pinch-of-sh*t if you can't persuade people to buy what you're offering. Copywriting is still KING - writing words that persuade people to buy. That's why some of us copywriters command the big bucks. The writing can make or break a campaign. Even the writing of the Title of your autoresponder series. Or the short copy in your squeeze page. Or the script of your video. Or the headline and body-copy of your salespage.

But if you're busted-ass broke and can't afford a writer - even a reasonable-priced writer like me - here's a Do-it-Yourself guide to knocking together a salespage.

WARNING: fowl jokes and blatant sexual innuendos.

"$15,000-a-salespage copywriters
don't want you to know
these cash-generating triggers
- but I'm spilling the beans

So how does FREE grab you? I'm giving you a complete "Write your own sales page" template. I'm "giving away the farm". You can literally take this stuff and write your own sales page - a page that will have your readers hitting the Buy Button. Or you can pay me to write it for you. More on that later. Let's get into it.

You want fries with that?


Grilled Chicken Ass??

Today we're going to write some fowl copy. Ha-bloody-ha. We're going to flesh out a sales page for that yummy-looking chicken ass above. But it doesn't have to be chicken ass. It could be anything. Even a turkey. Or a dead duck.

First, Catch Your Chicken

It's not essential but you may want to start your page off with a pre-head that targets or pre-qualifies who you're pitching. In this case let's go with

"Hey Barbecue Chicken-Lovers - you're gonna love this!

Followed by your headline. Your headline is vitally important.

A headline, of course, is… AN AD FOR YOUR AD! - Gary Halbert

Your brilliant copy will sink or swim depending on how well you hook your readers with the headline. You need to grab your readers attention - really grab them - hit their “hot button” and have them reading on.

"Put it in inverted commas - it improves readability. Or at least start it with some over-sized inverted commas like I have here.

And if you can stick a benefit in there, even better.

Put your reader in the "drivers seat" by using "you" and "yours".

Headlines can be in serif or san serif body type and some say they should always be in lowercase but I don't agree with that. As you'll soon see. But I do agree the headline should never end in a period - a full-stop.

Here's a snippet of the chapter on headlines in "Breakthrough Advertising Secrets" by Eugene Schwartz -

You have ten seconds for your headline to stop that hand from throwing your piece away. So what is a headline? That’s very important. And a headline is a very simple device that has a very easy job to do. Except that people make it extremely hard.

The purpose of this headline: "Burn Disease Out of Your Body" - which is the first thing they see in those ten seconds - is to get them to read the next paragraph.

That’s all it is. Nothing else. It sells nothing. It confirms nothing. It argues nothing. It establishes nothing about the firm. If it stands by itself it would do nothing in the world, but all it’s gotta do is, it’s got to get them to read the next paragraph.

Second, how long should a headline be? That’s a classic question in copywriting. And, of course, the answer is, "No determined length." The headline depends strictly on how long it gets you to stop the person and get them going.

And the third question is, how many headlines can there be in a mailing piece? And that, of course, is as many as you get on the page and make work.

John Caples - the copywriter who wrote "They laughed when I sat down at the piano..." said a good headline should -

• appeal to the prospects self-interest. He/she should want it badly
• should have a dash of curiosity - something unusual or paradoxical (a statement that contradicts itself)
• have news value - "just released", "new discovery"
• have the offer be able to be claimed quickly and easily (instant download)
• offer a solution to the prospect's problem etc

But let's ignore that advice for now and go with

"Oh Yeah!
Smoky Texas-Style
BARBECUED CHICKEN ASS

You might qualify your head with “the deck” - the few lines of copy that you can run under the headline to further qualify or “hook” your readers. In this case we'll say


- ass-licking good

So now we've got -

Hey Barbecue Chicken-Lovers - you're gonna love this!

"Oh Yeah!
Smoky Texas-Style
BARBECUED CHICKEN ASS
- ass-licking good

There it is - the complete pre-head/head/deck - the 'headline". Which, if its done its job properly, will get your prospect to read your body copy. And obviously the first line of the body copy is the most important. Get to the point. Grab them by the balls.

Don't be tempted to say something lame like "I'm going to get straight to the point. There's no fluff or filler in this report. I know you're busy. I know you don't have time to wade through a bunch of buzz words so I'm not going to muck around. I'm gonna give it to you straight. blah blah blah." Get to the bloody point already.

Spellcheck it. It's not a good look to have typos and spelling mistakes throughout your copy - makes you look like a dumbass.

...and don't be tempted to write something like "How to Make a Million Dollars Online - Overnight and in Your Jocks!" The punters might click on it but then they're just going to be saying to themselves (rightly so) "This is Total BS". And you've lost them forever. Unless of course you really can prove that you have a system that will do that. Or they're tonguing for grilled chicken ass. Laugh-Out-Friggin' Loud.

Video Killed What?

Should you use video? Done properly, video can be very powerful. Here's one I knocked together for a well-known Internet Marketer whose name will remain anonymous (Frank Kern). BTW it is true I've done some stuff for Frank Kern. And it is true he paid me four figures for it.

[IMG]http://www.yourinternets.com/storage/CryingOu...

Click on the image to play the video

The funny thing about video is not everyone will click on it and watch it. Maybe because they're watching at work. Or they don't have broadband. Or they prefer to read. I can almost guarantee that only 10% of readers will play that video. (But if it were a naked girl it might be double that).

BTW using a host like Amazon S3 or the Open Source Flow Player looks much more professional than YouTube.

Just Do It, Dude

There are several ways to start. You could tell a story. Or you could just start off by telling us what you have, what it does, why our miserable lives will be so much better if we have one too. Later on you'll tell us the price and where and how we can get it.

Or you could give your readers a taste of what's to come. In this case it might be something like -

As firewood, mesquite burns slow and very hot. When used to barbecue chicken ass, the smoke from the wood adds an unbelievable flavor to the bird. Giving a true Texas-style grilled chicken ass. Our chickens are free-range birds. They spend their lives "home on the range" - scratching dirt on a 1000 acre ranch out of El Paso. That's why they yield the best-tasting ass. Ass to die for.

Or you could always mess with your readers minds with lame Grilled Chicken Ass stories - "These two birds went into a Tex-Mex bar...".

But whatever you do, make your copy entertaining. Don't bore your reader to death.

Who the Hell is This Guy?

Somewhere near the beginning of the page and "above the fold" you might want to put your mugshot and introduce yourself. You're establishing credibility.

"Hi, my name is Malcolm Lambe a.k.a. The Copy Nazi. I'm an internet copywriter. That's me above holding some of the greenbacks I'm gonna make you. I take a lousy photograph so I didn't want to put you off by showing my face. But it's not what I look like – it's what I can do for you, Dude. Quite simply, I will make you a sh*tload of money with my copy.

Who have I worked for? Some of the biggest names in Internet Marketing – some of the “whales” in this game. Also some of the "up and comers" - like George Montagu Brown of "Google Sniper" fame. You know when George ran his first WSO here I said "Here's the next Frank Kern". And I was right. That kid is now pulling in $126k a month and has made over a million in the past year." Yada yada yada.

Write in Simple Short Sentences That a 5 year old Will Have No Trouble Understanding

Talk one-on-one with your reader as if you were talking to your best friend. Or your five year old.

What Else?

Use simple “plain vanilla” words that everyone will understand. Avoid trying to be too “cute” with your words. (Unless of course you're The Copy Nazi - in which case you can get away with it).

Just tell us your story. Start off by telling us what you have, what it does, why our miserable lives will be so much better if we have one too, tell us the price, tell us how and where to get the chicken ass.

In fact, read the copy aloud to a five year old. If there are parts he/she doesn't understand - dumb it down.

Break the Copy Up Into Chunks

We don't read all your words. We scan. We might come back and read all your copy thoroughly but to begin with, we scan. We scroll down, stopping at the “good bits”.

If there is a whole block of copy of long convoluted sentences with big scary words in it, with barely any paragraphs and no bolding or subheads - people are not going to read it. They'll run a mile. So break it up. You're not writing for The New York Times. You're writing for "Joe the Plumber". Make it easy for him. KISS - Keep It Simple, Stupid.

Make it Easy To Read

Use one idea per paragraph. With subheads. The subheads should be written so that when you scan the page your reader gets the gist of the story - what the page is about - without having to read the body copy in detail. Try and make the subheads a bit cheeky or entertaining.

You can put the subheads in a different font if you like. I've used "Verdana" here in the body copy. And "Impact" in the headline. Some people swear by Arial, Verdana or Tahoma in the body copy. I think the brilliant Direct Response copywriter, Gary Halbert, was a fan of "Courier New" - this one.

Bolding, underlining and highlighting can also make the copy more readable. But don't go crazy with any of them.

Putting important copy in a different font will make it stand out against the rest. Make sure it's an easy-to-read font like this Verdana. Avoid arty fonts. Drop-shadow fonts in headlines seem to be the flavor-of-the-month but they are much harder to read than common-or-garden-variety fonts.

Hand-writing fonts work well too. Again, don't go crazy with it.

Secret Weapon

Use this tool to put hand-drawn doodles on your page. Like arrows, underlines, stars, asterisks, smilies - all have shown to increase conversions.

Don't Forget the Captions

Before I forget. Here's a good tip. A powerful tip. Put captions under every photo. People love captions. Every caption will be read. Make the caption part of your pitch as well.

What's In It For Me?

Think in terms of “benefits” rather than features -

“This chicken ass is char-grilled” is a feature.

“This chicken ass is lovingly cooked over a mesquite-fired char-grill so you get all the subtle smoky flavors of the wood blending with the barbequed bird - just like a real Texan barbecue" is a benefit.

Answer the reader's “What's in it for me?”. He could care less about your amazing features. He wants to know how those features will benefit him.

Do I Really Need To Be A “Good Writer”?

Yes and no. Personally I'm pretty keen on correct grammar, syntax and spelling. But I'm not anal about it.

As for style, Gary Halbert used to say -

“Being on target is much more important than being facile with words

In other words don't pitch a Knitting Book to a bunch of truckdrivers. Know who you're talking to. Who you are targeting. And talk to them in their language.

Halbert also said -

“People don't have time for your pathetic subtleties”

Which means don't try and be too clever. And don't use words that most people don't understand. You're not writing The World's Greatest Novel or a piece for The New York Times. Use simple, short, everyday words in short, simple sentences. In words a 5 year old understands. The last thing you want is your reader saying “Wow...this is a beautifully-crafted piece of copy” (unless he's a fellow copywriter).

Famous copywriter John Caples (he of the "They laughed when I sat down at the piano..." print ad.) in 1932 (78 years ago!) put it like this -

Don’t make ads simple because you think people are low in intelligence. Some are smart and some are not smart. The point is that people are thinking about other things when they see your ad. Your ad does not get their full attention or intelligence. Your ad gets only a fraction of their intelligence . . . . People won’t study your ad carefully. They can’t be bothered. And so you have to make your ads simple.

It's Not Rocket Science

Tell me what you have, tell me what it does, tell me why my life will be so much better if I have one too, tell me how much, tell me where to get it. Don't be afraid to repeat the important bits. Or say the same thing again but spin it.

Show Me The Proof

Show me some proof your product does what you say it will do. Real proof - not dodgy screenshots of earnings or useless testimonials from “Jo Blow, Canada”. Video proof can be extremely powerful. Did you see the recent launch of "The Magic Bullet System" for CPA marketing? Sold $1 Million in 1:05 hours even before it was officially launched. Why? The video "proof" was killer - it showed the developers logging on to their accounts in real time - "show me the money" - rather than a dodgy earnings screenshot that anyone can make with a simple line of javascript. I'll show you how to do it ☞ Click here

Here's a neat Testimonial Generator Tool for you.




Ask For The Order

Stick several “Buy Buttons” on the page. Don't just rely on your reader scrolling to the very bottom of the page to find a Buy Button. If you've done a good job some of your readers will hit a Buy Button half-way through the copy. Some say “Add To Cart” works better than “Buy Now” or “Order Now”. Check out Troy Gardner's free "The Ultimate Belcher Button Wizard" - comes with roll-over effects and Sound Effects. Way cool. It's the one I use with great success - in the real world. Here I rely on the WSO Pro system.

Talking about order forms. Check this one out. On the American Writers and Artists Inc. site. See what they've done here? Three options. Which one do you think gets clicked the most? https://www.awaionline.net/_orders/w...redby=WWCWHA21

See how they offer the order form? "Print Version - $149"..."Online version - $149"..." Combo Version ( in bold) - Best Deal - $199".

"Please allow 10 business days for delivery of the print version. Shipping and Handling charges for print:
U.S.: $7; Other Countries: $12"

What do you think most people are gonna go for? You got it.

Will it work for your product? Or your WSO even?

Here comes the pitch! Here's the deal. Maybe after reading that stuff above you still don't think you can write your own page or you couldn't be assed. Cool. So get me to do it. At a greatly reduced price. A Warrior Special Offer price.

A Warrior Special Offer Means The Price You Give Must Be Better Than The Price The Public At Large Can Get.

I know you come here looking for smoking hot bargains. Me too. So how about this? Normally I charge at least $5000 for a sales page. Hey there's a lot of work in it. But for you I'll do it for half-price - $2500 - paid up front. With a proviso - please don't give me any turkeys. I'm not interested in writing for Penis Enlargement sites or "Make Your Car Run on Your Farts" -type of stuff.

But hang on! I've forgotten one important element - make it an

IRRESISTIBLE OFFER

So lets make things even more interesting. I'm going to slash the price even further...down to

$1250

How does that grab you? A $5000 salesletter - from the guy that's written for a stellar line-up of current Internet Marketing stars - for just a fraction of that. (Math was never my strong suit so I can't express that as a percentage off).

It doesn't get much better than this. Any cheaper and I might as well do it for nothing. Hit the damn button Gomer before I change my mind.

☝☝☝


Don't Be “Precious” About Your Copy

Testing is the name of the game. Sometimes just adding or deleting a single word will skyrocket conversions. The headline is the most important part of the whole page. You only have a second or two to seduce your readers before they click off. So make sure your headline grabs them by the you-know-whats. Or you're dead in the water.

Don't waffle in your copy. Generally, "less is more".

If the copy isn't converting - kill it and start again.

#1 With a Bullet

Putting important things in bullet form makes them easier to read. Odd numbers of bullets work better. No more than 7 of them. You know you need to add testimonials, “social proof”, p.s., call to action ("Hit that button Now!") - all that jive. That stuff is important but its mainly window dressing. What's important is -


☞ be on target

☞ use simple, short sentences

☞ get to the point

☞ break your copy into chunks so it's easier to read

☞ don't use dodgy screenshots or fake testimonials

☞ test and test again

☞ use bullets or special characters

Voila! How to write your own copy in one easy lesson. But if that's still too hard for you or you haven't the time, hit the "Buy Now" button and send me your life savings. Then email me or PM me here and we'll talk turkey - or grilled chicken ass.

Oh yeah. One more thing. "How long should a salespage be?" That's another question I get asked all the time.

The answer, of course, is "as long as it needs to be". Yes I know I said previously "less is more" but tests have proved over and over again that the longer you can keep your readers on the page, the more likely you are to convert them into sales.

The trick, as I said before, is to keep them entertained...keep them interested in reading on. Too many so-called "long form salesletters" waffle on with boring sh*t thinking that will do the trick. It doesn't. In fact it has the opposite affect of just pissing people off. And bye-bye to the sale. So on that note I'm gonna finish up.

But not before I mention the old "scarcity tactic". You know - bullsh*t your reader that the "offer ends at midnight" so he'd better pull his finger out and order. Or that "only 500 copies" will be sold (see the "Get FB Ads Free" thing launched a couple of days ago - I keep refreshing the page and it still says "33 left" - that guy should be taken out the back and shot)

Do you fall for that crap? Thought so. I don't either.

But GENUINE SCARCITY works. In fact I've a neat little script a fellow Warrior developed that limits sales to "One Per Zip Code". That's pretty cool. And Frank Kern used something similar when they did the Neil Strauss "Seduction" launch.

So here's my scarcity pitch. I'm not convinced that slashing my rates is an "Irresistible Offer" or necessarily a good thing. I'm worried that it positions me as "that guy that does the $1250 WSO Copy Specials". I kinda feel like a high-class hooker reduced to schlepping her ass down the street.

BUT I have met some great clients here and it leads to on-going work. So this offer is like a supermarket's "loss-leader" to me. It puts the pressure on because I put the same amount of time into these gigs as I do into $5k gigs (shh - don't tell the other guys).

So here's what I'm going to do. I'm gonna run this WSO for a week maybe. Book work through for a few months. Then I probably won't do this again. I'm going to be pushing my own product soon and that's pretty-well going to take up all my time.

Like I said - I've got plenty on. And if you hire me you'll have to wait a week or so. But if you think I might be able to help you move some product...hit the button.

Cheers,

Malkie

p.s. I just put some testimonials up. They cost me a lot of money so I hope you at least read them. LOL.

p.p.s. if you want your copy to read like the spoken word, invest in Dragon Naturally Speaking (for PCs) or Dragon Dictate (for Mac) and dictate your copy while the program writes it for you. I've even used it to write directly into this forum. And on emails. And Skype. They say it's 99% accurate but that's BS. It does make a few mistakes. For instance when I say "Australian" in my Australian accent, it used to write it as "Estonian". (Not any more. I kicked it in the ass and it stopped)

p.p.p.s. please hit the "Thanks" button if I've managed to help you. Thanks!

FOOTNOTE:

Here's the thing. Do you realise how much time is involved in crafting a converting salesletter? A lot. Frankly more than $1250 worth. The time isn't so much in writing the copy. That's the easy part. The time is in understanding your product/your offer. Research. Making sure we're on target.

When I work with a client I don't just take your money and dash off a salesletter I think will work. I talk to you on Skype. We exchange a million emails. I read a whole bunch of stuff. I ask a zillion questions. I effectively become your Business partner - your Marketing partner. And all that takes time. Much more time than this $1250 will buy. That's a fact. Even if I just costed myself out at $50 an hour or whatever.

So $1250? Laughable really. What was I thinking. What I really hope is that anybody that picks up this offer will go on to become a lifelong client. I'm looking to work with just a small bunch of motivated marketers that understand there is no "Silver Bullet". You can't hope to just throw $1250 at me and the salesletter will be an instant hit and the answer to all your problems. Doesn't work like that. It's a process. And it takes two to tango. Underlying all that is the need to test. Sometimes just changing a word in the headline can make all the difference.

I'm not desperate for a quid - as we say Downunder. I don't want to take your money if I think we can't work well together. Already I've knocked back several potential clients from this WSO because I either didn't like their product or I didn't think they had the right attitude - they were just looking for a "miracle cure" - a "quick fix". It doesn't work like that.

So if you have a great product but not a lot of money to promote it and you're struggling with your salesletter or landing page, just following what I've outlined above should help you enormously. I haven't actually "given away the farm" as I claimed. I've kept quite a few tricks up my sleeve. But there's more than the basics there to get you going. If you have the time and the inclination.

BIG TIP:

nobody likes to be Sold to. People online are a lot more sophisticated now than they were even just a couple of years ago. Our "bullsh*t meters" are highly-tuned.

Above all readers detest marketese – you know the kind of stuff - "hottest ever", “price goes up at Midnight”, “Never repeated special offer”, “buy now or you'll miss out” and my personal favorite - “The web's #1 trusted site (for)". They're all Big No-Nos in my book.

Don't try and bullsh*t us. We're hip to it. We're whizzing around the net all day long. Just give us the straight dope and give it to us quick. Supersize me later if you must. But right now I'm hungry and I wanna eat.

Using "marketese" - sales talk - and unsubstantiated claims just turns us off. We're all looking for "information" - information to help us solve our problems. We're not looking to be "sold".

Malkie to FRANK KERN recently:

I'm dropping your name like a mother****er all over the shop. You may even get people saying "Who is this a**hole Malcolm Lambe? Claims he's done some copy for you.

To which Frank replied:

I'll tell them you saved my life in Vietnam and that in return, I gave you a kidney.

Testimonials From Warriors

You're a damn fine writer, Mr. Lambe.

Frank Kern

CopyNazi DOES NOT play around. Possibly the best copywriter I have ever seen.

Jamie Lewis, "Income Entourage"

I was fortunate to get in fairly early on one of Mal's copywriting WSOs.

I threw over a half-finished copy of my product, and a vague outline of what I wanted.

Mal did the rest...ahead of schedule...and it's FANTASTIC!

What separates Mal from other copywriters I've used before is that he has a healthy disregard for conventional copywriting 'wisdom'...you won't find any formulaic BS in his work.

He writes for the READER. He has a wonderful, conversational style, which effortlessly pulls the reader from first word to last - in an off-the-cuff, soft sell kind of way.

I'm fully expecting Mal's copy to convert like crazy in my niche.

Here's the deal - before you break the rules, you gotta know the rules. It's plain obvious that Mal knows what he's doing.

Get on it before he starts charging his true worth, Warriors.

Oh...you may have noticed that Mal comes across in a no-nonsense...almost abrasive manner.

Pay no attention...he cares deeply about his reputation, and will do his utmost to help you out.

I know this for a fact.

Jump on this WSO. Now.

Steve Fullman

Mal just finished up a landing page for me. I hate writing copy but can sure tell when a page is doing its job. His pages are très sexy.

He figured out how to talk to my target market and made my copy compelling. He asked great questions to understand my product, my market and offered some advice that really got me to thinking and approach my product from a different angle.

Mal can be a bit "colorful" at times. So if you are super sensitive or super whiny, he may not be your guy.

If you want some kick-ass copy and good customer service without a bunch of bs - hire Mal.

Melody

OK Just went through it in detail. Bottom line – Fantastic Work!

I really appreciate the hard work and you nailed it pal!

If you have any adjustments or tweaks, let me know, but all in all, I am ecstatic with it.

Have a great evening and have a beer (a real beer that is, none of that french crap) and toast yourself on a great job.

All the best,
Sean Donahue (Video Marketing and YouTube Marketing with Video Assassin)

I contacted Metronicity to give me a couple of tips regarding my WSO sales letter and headline and he took the time to tell me that my headline sucks big time.

He gave me a couple of tips, which I implemented, and my Conversion Rate jumped through the roof!
He's the real deal, or like we say here, he's 'The Sh*t'.

He brings some fresh wind and he has mad skills. You should take advantage of his services as they're still ridiculously cheap.

Cheers,
mario (yellowboy)

Here's more testimonials. I actually gave this guy his money back as I thought what he was writing himself was pretty good - not grammatically correct but it "resonated" and I didn't think I could improve on it.

Malcolm,
I don't think i have EVER met anyone quite like you since I've been doing this internet lark...you're a REAL star. I sat back, looked at your copy and thought ok...its not bad...and i was about to email you back asking if you could have another go.

That was my fault for not giving you enough information...i find it hard to explain things see, simply because i expect everyone to know what I'm on about!

From what i have heard of you, and the fact you replied to me first offering another shot at it, and coming up with something that i didn't think of is well, true loyalty!

Guys, if you need a squeeze page doing, a salesletter...Any sort of copywriting, Malcolm is the guy. His out take on things is down to earth. YES, maybe he may get on your nerves...YES he may be a bit mad in his methodology, YES he can be very demanding, but tell him EXACTLY what you want, and he'll deliver.

Keep up the great work Malcolm you crazy Aussie!
Digitips

And another one -

Mal's work was exceptional, and beyond my wildest expectations. His price is just plain crazy cheap. If you need some fire in your sales copy and offer, you would have to be mad as a hatter to pass on this arsonist's offer. Brilliant stuff. I'm glad I gobbled a bunch of them up. Money well spent. If I didn't know better I would think it was he, that Nero played the fiddle for while Rome burned.

Mal has a certain je ne sais quoi in his copywriting, that captures the reader's imagination, as all things must that involve quantities of beer, Paris and crazy Aussies, that have fled their homeland, for who knows what reasons.

Bob Silber.

And I'll get that Bob Silber later for the outrageous slur on my good character. But he did send me an email saying -

"You have a gift my friend, a special talent. Damn good stuff. I love it."

BTW this is the Bob Silber, Attorney who advises Frank Kern, John Reese - all those guys. And was once Frank Sinatra's Attorney.

Here's another -

What can I say... Other than has Mal gone stark raving bonkers?

For this kind of quality you'd normally be looking at well over a grand... Because as we all know a good sales letter is an invaluable asset to your business.

George Montagu Brown Google Sniper & Traffic Ultimatum

Just to be clear. I did some early stuff with George on Google Sniper. The squeeze and a salespage. But he was already committed to David Raybould for the final Sniper salespage - and a great job he made of it too!

You probably know that one of the key secrets to the ultimate sales page is...Experience

Paul Myers tells the story of a guy who paid Paul for a copy re-write. All Paul did was change a little bit of the sales letter down towards the end of the sales page.

Product sales quickly shot through the roof.

Want that for your sales page? You can have it. All you need is Malcolm Lambe (Metronicity) to be your Paul Myers.

Malcolm recently helped me redo one of my sales pages. He gave me tips on my headlines, showed me whole sections of my page that I needed to remove, he gave me some killer tips for my order buttons, and on top of that threw in a little coaching session on sales pages in general.

You will discover, like I did, that the insights he provides are worth way more than what he charges.

So, you can't afford Paul Myers, but you still want that magic touch that will bring your sales page to life?

Hire Malcolm. And then duck as he dives at your sales page.

You will never look at sales copy the same way again. Warrior - Nick H DIYBeeHive

Don't waste time thinking your salesletter can't be made better.. Cause I guarantee Mal WILL make it better...

Mal is awesome and a great errrmm(crazy) guy but he can make a letter convert and that is what counts..(don't pay any attention to the blond curly headed guy behind the curtain)

Don't muck about. Just do it!

Dennis Cheesman Ready Profit Systems

My God, what a post, a complete lesson in it's own right. What a lot of people don't realise with you, is you don't just provide copywriting, you provide the WHOLE package...because it just one thing isn't right, you don't get sales! (I have no clue about grammar..uhh..or is that grammer..and spelling ha ha)

I know the term 'something you can take to the bank' is over used as an IM buzz term, but in your case it's true...I mean, you tell me to change a heading or a graphic, or a video or whatever, and that has doubled or trippled conversions...now THAT'S something I can and HAVE taken to the bank!

Phil. Wheatley Heavy Metal Guitar

I'm not one who generally writes in to thank someone, but I feel compelled to leave this note about Malcolm's services.

I hired Malcolm to write a long form sales letter for an ebook/membership program I have created. I've found in the past that a good copywriter will write good copy and a great copywriter will get into the mind of the potential client and research the industry thoroughly. That being said, I'm not sure how to characterize Malcolm's services as he has broken this mold of excellence. Malcolm's gone above and beyond anything I've experienced - providing me with innovative research on keywords, insight on my competition, and several 'aha' ideas on how to gain a competitive edge in my space.

I am seriously thrilled at the package I've received, and this is just over the last 3 days since I've hired him! Thanks, Malkie!!!!! You rule! Renjain

So I got this private message from Mal today. Said he was lonely and wanted to boost his ego by getting more Facebook friends. He offered me a pack of smokes to be his Facebook BFF. Even though I only smoke Cuban cigars, I felt sorry for him so I said "yes."

So I was over checking out his Facebook profile to see if he had any pictures of hot women (he didn't) when I came across a link to his blog.

In general I don't like blogs. They are almost always poorly written, self-indulgent, myopic narratives about the fecal peculiarities of "Sir Boots McKitten" the "most adorable feline on the planet."

But I do like making fun of people so I went over to Mal's pool of Narcissus hoping to find some embarrassing fodder to use either as blackmail or comedy.

Instead, I find this:

PPC Classroom Is A CompleteJoke - PPC Classroom Is A Joke - Your Internets

Understand, I wanted to poke fun. I wanted to get my jollies at Mal's expense.

But instead of finding something I could use to exercise my rapier wit, I found one of the best examples of blog advertorial posts I have ever seen. I almost bought the product. Again. Even though I not only own the super-deluxe version, I have lunch with Perry Marshall at least twice a week. (We are so close we took separate vacations this year.)

Everyone go now and read the freakin' post. You will see what I mean.

Kevin Bidwell.

Yeah thanks Big Kev. Best part is Perry Marshall's P.A. emailed me to thank me on Perry's behalf. Which I found kind of weird and told her so. Who gets their P.A. to send emails? I signed off "[this has been dictated to Malcolm Lambe's P.A. as Mr Lambe is far too busy and important to be bothered with such trivial matters] That should get him going.

Still Undecided? Call Me - "Metronicity" on Skype. Or pony up the cash Dude. Hit that button up top!
CAVEAT: I've said it before and I'll say it again. There are no "silver bullets" in marketing. If you've come to me hoping for an "instant fix" (like matey in the comments) you're going to be sadly disappointed. It doesn't work like that and any marketer or copywriter who promises you that is leading you astray. A lot of elements come in to play during a campaign - not just the copy. If you take my copy but don't follow my formatting advice or add and delete elements of the copy it may affect your results. This is a partnership. We need to work together. Sometimes we may have to delete stuff, change stuff, move stuff around. That's normal. Sometimes you can throw the new page up and get instant results and that's great - that's a home run. Other times we might have to work on our game. All this takes time, skill and concentration - "blood, sweat and tears".

So please...if you feel you're not getting the results you'd hoped for with my new copy...work with me. Don't get hysterical and start demanding a refund after half a day of half-assed testing (like a certain fan of mine in the comments). It doesn't work like that and quite frankly I don't want your business if that's how you're going to treat me. I'm charging (and getting) $5000 a salesletter now - from people that recognise what my concepts and copy can do for their business. So at this WSO price of $1250 it's still ridiculously cheap. Especially when you consider the amount of time I spend on each job.

à bientôt, Malkie

Ha ha (excuse my French)

[agatto2]

Malcom

What a Kick chiken Ass post -----

Thanks

[uniqueape]

nice post man it was chicken ass good

[wordwizard]

What a cool post!

Very funny and great info!

Plus I loved the way you sequed into your sales pitch.

Thanks!

[tomsmart80]

Thank you for copy writing 101

[Mountainmotorman]

Malcolm you rock pal! You always seem to be dead on with your analyst of it!

[4thstreet]

Dude your post is just phreaken cool - I love it!

[elos]

Hy,

So what i exactly get wit your WSO? Only salespage or including order page, video?

If is only salespage why is this better offer than this one ® Riding Shotgun with FRANK KERN

Elvis

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by elos

Hy,

So what i exactly get wit your WSO? Only salespage or including order page, video?

If is only salespage why is this better offer than this one ® Riding Shotgun with FRANK KERN

Elvis

Normally I charge at least $2500 for a sales page. But for you guys I'll do it for $1499 - paid up front.

You want a video as well? The last WSO was 6 months ago. And I did say in that one -

I'm charging five heroes just $999 for their sales page. Is it “better than the price the public at large can get”? You bet it is Pilgrim. Listen, you can imagine what I charged Frank Kern. (Let's just say it was in the four figures.) You are getting a substantial discount here. Not just a discount - a friggin' fire sale. But it's only for the first five Warriors. Then it's back to book rate.

If you're serious, PM me. But I'm not exactly desperate for work.

[skatir]

What is the convertion rate we can get from your high quality sales letter ?

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by skatir

What is the convertion rate we can get from your high quality sales letter ?

Ah...the old conversion rate question. I always answer "I call a 2%-4% conversion rate a success" but that's pretty conservative. But the thing is, the Conversion Rate just doesn't hinge on the copy. The product/the offer/the layout/split-testing all play their part. I don't think any decent copywriter will guarantee you a conversion rate. We're in this thing together and there's no "magic bullet".

[Chris Morris]

You say you wrote for Kern? How long ago? My guess would be when he was brand new on the scene because he took on Harlan and learned from him and writes his own copy now.

Do you have any sample work?

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by Chris Morris

You say you wrote for Kern? How long ago? My guess would be when he was brand new on the scene because he took on Harlan and learned from him and writes his own copy now.

Do you have any sample work?

Your "guess" is wrong. I wrote him a salespage quite recently. ® Riding Shotgun with FRANK KERN

He hasn't done anything with Harlan Kilstein for a long while. Yes, of course I have samples.

I see you're in Frank's fan club. Good for you. So am I. I love it when people try and call me out on this. Kilstein and others tried to do the same thing. Read the (now locked) thread on the copy forum about it - Frank Kern can eat my shorts. cheers, Mal.

[Paul Walker]

Malcom, very nice post and very interesting offer.

Btw, do you work on niches like forex?

I am tempting to press the buy button already.

Thanks,
P

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by Paul Walker

Malcom, very nice post and very interesting offer.

Btw, do you work on niches like forex?

I am tempting to press the buy button already.

Thanks,
P

I've had a crack at it. With a JV. But he mucked me around. Big talk/no action. I got as far as the concept and even registered a URL - http://www.daytraderdeadbeat.com and www.deadbeatdaytrader.com

Would love to have a crack at it. One of my colleagues has just done a Clickbank Forex page (to the formula) for some Clickbank whales and brained it. They offered it to me first - wanted me to do 4 Clickbank pages for $5000 up front and I knocked it back.

PM me if you want to Rock 'n' Roll.

[The Copy Nazi]

@ Nick Holliday, got your grand. Thanks. Just heading out to the casino with it. Black or Red?

[davidmt]

Hi Malcom, very nice and interesting offer.

Thanks
David.

[Rozaidi]

Funny and interesting offer

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by Rozaidi

Funny and interesting offer

I should have called it

"How to Beat-Up Your One and Only Gig with Frank Kern to Make it Look Like You're Best Buddies"

[poker princess]

How about the niche of my links. I am sure I am inspired by your post here and would definately get close to the buy button

A short info on how would you go ahead with my niche would be highly appreciated

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by poker princess

How about the niche of my links. I am sure I am inspired by your post here and would definately get close to the buy button

A short info on how would you go ahead with my niche would be highly appreciated

Angelina, right up my alley. We could have some fun with that one. That's a super-competitive niche but you have a HUGE advantage. Look in the mirror. I would make you the hero. You're some of the way there but it needs to be strengthened. And the writing needs a boost. I would dig to work with you on that one. You can talk to me on Skype if you like. I'll put the button back up. Or PM. I'm in Paris, France. à bientôt, Malkie.

BTW I've been to HK and Macau. Years ago. When the Brits ran the show. Even picked up some basic Cantonese. I got free drinks in some of the bars because they mistook me for a cop. I had a mustache at the time. ;-)

[The Copy Nazi]

Oh man. I have a...I was gonna say killer idea...but let's say a terrific idea for Nick Holliday's job. I got it from watching porno. That's right, porno. There are some really powerful porno sites out there. Those guys really know their stuff. They obviously use heat-maps and the like to see where the eyes go and where you click. So I'm gonna follow the same template for Nick's site - with his permission. His niche is real estate. So watch this space. I hopes he takes me up on it cause this is a kill...uh I mean a terrific idea. I'll give you a hint. Some of these porn sites let you watch a few seconds of a clip for free. To watch any more you have to Sign Up and pay a fee - pay to play, as it were. But the stuff they let you watch for free is amazing. Well on the good sites it is. Really gets you tonguing to see more. And then of course they lock you in and you can't get off the site and a zillion pop-ups do the dance of the seven veils as you desperately try to close your browser...and suddenly your wife comes home. "Hi home, I'm honey! What are you watching?"

(yes I'm completely straight writing this. I'll tell you more later. Can't wait to get started on Nicky-Boy's concept and copy. Tally-ho!)

[The Copy Nazi]

@ Renée

got your dosh. I'll talk to you on Skype if you like. Just sent you an email. Look forward to working with you. M.

[renjain]

Awesome deal - sent my payment!

[renjain]

I'm not one who generally writes in to thank someone, but I feel compelled to leave this note about Malcolm's services.

I hired Malcolm to write a long form sales letter for an ebook/membership program I have created. I've found the past that a good copywriter will write good copy and a great copywriter will get into the mind of the potential client and research the industry thoroughly. That being said, I'm not sure how to characterize Malcolm's services as he has broken this mold of excellence. Malcolm's gone above and beyond anything I've experienced providing me and innovative research on keywords, insight on my competition, and several 'aha' ideas on how to gain a competitive edge in my space.

I am seriously thrilled at the package I've received, and this is just over the last 3 days since I've hired him! Thanks, Malkie!!!!! You rule!

[WinsonYeung]

After writing your WSO and the comment, I can't hold myself from getting your WSO to remake my sale letter at High Quality Backlinks Building Service For Easy SEO

Seriously, I'm kinda satisfied at my current conversation rate of 1.85% but I think it's time to spend more money to invest on my business.

Going to send the payment now, hope this will be a wise decision.

P.S. Never spend more than $200 buying a WSO, this will be my first time

[WinsonYeung]

Just made my payment.

Transaction ID: 3NH90396SN324391Y


Hey Dude,

I seriously made a mistaken and purchase the wrong WSO.

The WSO I want to get is this chicken ass WSO but I scroll over to one of your link and bought another WSO accidentally.

® Riding Shotgun with FRANK KERN

After the payment, I was redirected to http://www.yourinternets.com/ ( I don't know why) but can you fix the payment error instead and send an email to me after that?

Sorry for making the wrong payment.

Looking forward your reply.

Regards,
Winson

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by WinsonYeung

Just made my payment.

Transaction ID: 3NH90396SN324391Y


Hey Dude,

I seriously made a mistaken and purchase the wrong WSO.

The WSO I want to get is this chicken ass WSO but I scroll over to one of your link and bought another WSO accidentally.

® Riding Shotgun with FRANK KERN

After the payment, I was redirected to Your Internets - Your Internets ( I don't know why) but can you fix the payment error instead and send an email to me after that?

Sorry for making the wrong payment.

Looking forward your reply.

Regards,
Winson

No worries. Its sorted. M.

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by WinsonYeung

After writing your WSO and the comment, I can't hold myself from getting your WSO to remake my sale letter at High Quality Backlinks Building Service For Easy SEO

Seriously, I'm kinda satisfied at my current conversation rate of 1.85% but I think it's time to spend more money to invest on my business.

Going to send the payment now, hope this will be a wise decision.

P.S. Never spend more than $200 buying a WSO, this will be my first time

Scared huh. Well get in, buckle up and hang on - you're in for a wild ride.

[jdpruitt]

Dude, that was EPIC. lolz

[The Copy Nazi]

Here's some copy I wrote for Bob Silber - the eminent I.M. Attorney and FTC expert. I'm going to ask him to cut us a deal on his invaluable FTC compliance advice. If you're targeting the US market, this stuff is vitally important - even if you're based in another country.

I Didn't Know”
I Didn't Realise”
I Had No Idea”

These days any bozo can throw up a website and start selling stuff to the general public. But it's not quite as simple as that. There are laws governing the internet just as there are laws governing our offline conduct. And you need to be aware of them.

Ignorantia Juris Non Excusat”

“Ignorance of the Law Does Not Excuse”. If the Government's consumer watchdog agency for the Internet - the FTC - comes aknocking and closes down your website and freezes your assets you can't plead in your defence “Hey...I didn't realise I was doing anything wrong”. That won't wash with them. If you're an online marketer, a business owner with a website or even a blogger recommending affiliate products you need to know where you stand in the eyes of the law.

Are You Violating Laws You Don't Know About and Facing Serious Fines and Criminal Charges from the FTC and Other Enforcement Agencies?

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC ) in their words “works for the consumer to prevent fraudulent, deceptive and unfair business practices in the marketplace and to provide information to help consumers spot, stop and avoid them”.


That's all well and good for consumers but what exactly are the best business practices for internet marketers to follow?


Renowned Internet Attorney, Bob Silber, works for online marketers like you to make sure you don't unwittingly promote fraudulent, deceptive or unfair business practices. He provides valuable legal information in layman's terms to help you stay compliant with the latest FTC Rules & Regulations.

FTC on the Warpath (Again)

How long before the FTC visits your website? The FTC enforcement trends have been to levy increasingly higher and higher penalties on websites for violations. It only takes one unhappy customer to file a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission and have them check out your web site. Or, you could be one of the websites they visit today, independently, without a complaint.


You absolutely must know what the FTC looks for on your site when they're surfing the web or get a complaint. Telling the Judge or the Government you didn't know about certain laws just won't cut it. The FTC isn't concerned with your difficulties or problems being compliant with their laws, or you making money as an Internet marketer. Their only concern is protecting the consumer.


If you have an Internet business you need to know the laws that apply to e-commerce and how to protect yourself from catastrophic legal liability. You need to learn the cyber traps and avoid the mistakes that carry severe civil and criminal penalties. What you don't know, can and will hurt you.

Review Sites Under Review

The latest news from the FTC has them targeting blog “Review” sites.

Consumers often go online for independent consumer reviews of products and services, scouring through comments from bloggers to help them in their purchases.


In the eyes of the FTC such reviews can be tainted: many bloggers accept payment – what mainstream journalists call “cash for comment” - in the form of free laptops, trips to Europe, $500 gift cards or even thousands of dollars for blog posts.


New guidelines, expected to be approved late this summer, would clarify that the agency can go after bloggers — as well as the companies that compensate them — for any false claims or failure to disclose conflicts of interest.


It would be the first time the FTC tries to patrol systematically what bloggers say and do online. The common practice of posting a graphical ad or a link to an online retailer — and getting affiliate commissions for any sales from it — would be enough to trigger oversight.


The proposed guidelines aim to clarify the law and for the first time specifically include bloggers – loosely defined as anyone writing a personal journal online.


If the guidelines are approved, bloggers would have to back up claims and disclose if they're being compensated. Guidelines haven't been finalised or approved yet but it could be the FTC will order violators to stop and pay restitution to customers and it could ask the Justice Department to sue for civil penalties.


Any type of blog could be scrutinized, not just ones that specialize in reviews.


It's not just review sites being targeted. The guidelines would also cover affiliate marketing - merchants may also be responsible for actions by their sales agents — including bloggers.


Even Twitter and facebook posters could be targeted.

Expert Monthly Advice

Normally legal information like this costs an arm and a leg. Not any more. For a small monthly fee, Attorney Bob Silber, gives you his expert advice on the internet laws that you absolutely must know. Every month he discusses various pertinent internet marketing legal topics – including insights on the latest developments with the FTC and other statuary bodies. There are actual legal questions that marketers have had, in running their business, with the legal answers to those questions. The content is presented in text as well as video, audio, and pdf files.

Testimonials & Endorsements

He'll be looking at issues that are definitely “need to know”. Stuff like copyright and trademark laws – as they pertain to websites and internet marketing.


And he'll be taking a close look at the new guidelines on things such as testimonials and endorsements. The FTC is proposing significant revisions to its endorsement and testimonial guides. Under the proposed revisions, an advertiser will need to substantiate that the results depicted in a testimonial are typical.


The FTC has also proposed a provision that advertisers are subject to liability for false or unsubstantiated statements made through endorsements, or for failing to disclose material connections between themselves and their endorsers. This won't just affect online marketing but mainstream advertising and marketing as well. These are probably the most radical guidelines to be proposed to advertising/marketing laws in the past thirty years. And you definitely need to understand them.

Don't wait until the FTC comes knocking and it's too late

You need to know about the latest laws and guidelines now – not when the FTC checks out your site for compliance.
Each month the content is removed and put in an archive of previous months.
Access to each previous month that is archived is at a rate that is higher than the monthly membership. In other words, there is a financial disadvantage to not joining and missing content as well as the risk of running your online business illegally.

Your Site – a Ticking Time Bomb?

Chances are your website is a ticking time bomb that can catapult you into the poor house or worse, prison. You need to follow the law and become compliant now. Why roll the dice any longer? How long before your luck ends? The clock is ticking and time is running out.


In his new monthly membership site, Bob Silber is about to reveal some shocking information with you. Information most likely you didn't know. Recent FTC action against well-known internet marketers like Perry Belcher is a cautionary tale. (Belcher pled guilty to computer fraud, received a 10-year suspended sentence, forfeited many websites and more than $1 million in assets as part of a plea agreement). With cases like that the FTC is telling you what NOT to do. Heed their warnings and get Legally Compliant now, or you could be next.

Who's Who of Internet Marketers

Some people know Attorney Bob Silber as “Legal Counsel to the Internet Marketing Superstars".


His client list reads like a Who's Who of Internet Marketing. It includes guys like -


Jonathan Mizel
Michael Fortin
Jim Edwards
Ted Ciuba
Jim Cockrum
Stephen Pierce
Alan Bechtold
Brett Fogle
Jason Potash
Frank Kern
Cody Moya



John Reese
Tony Blake
Allen Says
Armand Morin
Marc Goldman
Tom Hua
Jeff Johnson
Russell Brunson
Sterling Valentine
Michael Filsaime
Mark Joyner



Jimmy D. Brown
Yanik Silver
Willie Crawford
Shawn Casey
Michael Kimble
Ken Calhoun
Jeff Walker
Kenneth A. McArthur
Joe Vitale
Brad Callen
Keith Wellman


See anyone you recognise? These are just some of the names from Bob Silber's client list.


Some of his most successful clients are names you wouldn't even recognize. Those clients are what he calls his "Shadow Marketers ™" and include individuals generating millions of dollars on the Net.


These "Shadow Marketers ™ " don't want their names known and you will never hear about them. When it comes to generating money on the Internet, this elite group leaves some of the most successful, recognizable marketing stars in the dust.


If you have an internet business and visit other marketer's websites, you may have noticed that most of the world's top internet marketers rely on Bob Silber's Complete FTC Legal Compliance & Civil Web Site Legal Protection Package on their websites. That complete package is licensed for $2788.00. Preparing the legal documents involved over 250 hours of Bob Silber's time and research to produce.

Do You Really Need Legal Advice?

Having improperly drafted legal documents is a serious mistake. In law, omitting a single word, or having a wrong word can cause serious liability. Mrs. Fields Cookies and Hershey's Chocolate were fined $100,000 and $80,000 respectively, by the Federal Trade Commission, for having an improperly worded privacy statement on their sites. (Apparently their lawyers weren't familiar with all the nuances of Internet law and FTC requirements).


Some other websites the FTC has hit with penalties include -


▪ American Pop Corn Company fined $10,000
▪ Lisa Frank, Inc. fined $30,000
▪ Monarch Services, Inc. fined $30,000
▪ The Ohio Art Company fined $35,000
▪ BigMailbox fined $35,000
▪ Looksmart fined $35,000
▪ Bonzi Software, distributor of the BonziBuddy software, fined $75,000
▪ UMG Recordings fined $400,000
▪
Even well-known and popular online entrepreneurs like Frank Kern have unwittingly fallen foul of the FTC (Kern had his assets completely frozen in 2005 while the FTC investigated his online business).


What Did All These Businesses Have In Common?


They all thought they ran a legitimate internet business when the FTC nabbed them. Read that again, it is that important. We're not talking about websites that are scamming people. The downfall of the scamming websites is a given, so those cases are not even mentioned here. These cases are websites that believed they were innocent of any wrongdoing at the time the FTC hammer dropped on them.

The Good News

Here's the Good News - now, you can access the legal advice the world's top internet marketing gurus rely on ... but at a fraction of the cost.


$27 a month makes you safe rather than sorry.


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▪ How To Do Business On The Internet While Keeping The Government Off Your Back
▪ 4 Things You Must Have On Your Web Site To Avoid Legal Problems & Law Suits
▪ New FTC guidelines on testimonials & endorsements.


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p.s. I've had some formatting problems here. For some reason it won't paste the first set of inverted commas. Weird.

I'm hoping Bob will cut us a killer deal on this. I've got to go twist his arm. Back shortly.

[bobsilber]

Hey Mad Mal,

Just returned from a two day mastermind with Brian McElroy, Brian McLeod and Kyle Tully along with my fried brain. Saw your email re: this thread and felt like I was in a bizarre Quentin Tarantino marketing film. Anywho I'm not ready to launch this yet, even though you wrote your usual enticing and delirious sales letter for it.

Thanks,
Bob Silber
.
.
.

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by bobsilber

Hey Mad Mal,

Just returned from a two day mastermind with Brian McElroy, Brian McElroy and Kyle Tully along with my fried brain. Saw your email re: this thread and felt like I was in a bizarre Quentin Tarantino marketing film. Anywho I'm not ready to launch this yet, even though you wrote your usual enticing and delirious sales letter for it.

Thanks,
Bob Silber
.
.
.

You been drinking Bob? Or are there really two guys with the same name in that group? Anywho...

[bobsilber]

Originally Posted by Metronicity

You been drinking Bob? Or are there really two guys with the same name in that group? Anywho...

Told you my brain was fried. Duly edited.

[Matthew Duggan]

I love it.

Mal is like the Louis CK of copywriting. I genuinely laughed out loud when I read the lines about what not to put as your headline.

Good skills.

[The Copy Nazi]

YouTube - Louis CK @ The Improv

[Alexissalaam]

Hi Malcom

You really killed it great copy I think I'm going need you on speed dial
I'll definitely be in touch with you

Alexis

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by Alexissalaam

Hi Malcom

You really killed it great copy I think I'm going need you on speed dial
I'll definitely be in touch with you

Alexis

Hit that button Dude. Soon I won't be able to keep up with the demand. So the price is definitely gonna be jacked. Should be a couple more Testimonials posted soon. I paid enough for them...Nah...seriously what I'm hoping is that some of these guys are going to post their conversion rates - after all - that's what it's all about.

Yeah guys and girls, the Fresh Chicken Ass Sale can't last forever. Or I'm gonna burnout. I currently have at least a week's backlog of work - that's what I tell the clients anyway - depends if I crack under the pressure or not. (Nah..."she'll be right mate" - as we say Downunder. "No worries".

[Steven Fullman]

Steve here,

You might've seen my testimonial up top...

I *GLADLY* sent Mal another 997...Bargain!

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by Steven Fullman

Steve here,

You might've seen my testimonial up top...

I *GLADLY* sent Mal another 997...Bargain!

Oh great...just what I need...more work...and I suppose you want it tomorrow?...like every other b...Hey Steve! just had an idea. What if I were to position myself as "The Copy Nazi" - you know...like "The Soup Nazi" out of "Seinfeld". "No copy for you!"..."Get off my WSO!" - like that. You think the punters would go for it?

JERRY: There's only one caveat -- the guy who runs the place is a little
temperamental, especially about the ordering procedure. He's secretly
referred to as the Soup Nazi.
ELAINE: Why? What happens if you don't order right?
JERRY: He yells and you don't get your soup.
ELAINE: What?
JERRY: Just follow the ordering procedure and you will be fine.
GEORGE: All right. All right. Let's - let's go over that again.
JERRY: All right. As you walk in the place move immediately to your right.
ELAINE: What?
JERRY: The main thing is to keep the line moving.
GEORGE: All right. So, you hold out your money, speak your soup in a loud,
clear voice, step to the left and receive.
JERRY: Right. It's very important not to embellish on your order. No
extraneous comments. No
questions. No compliments.
ELAINE: Oh, boy, I'm really scared!

[Steven Fullman]

Originally Posted by Metronicity

Oh great...just what I need...more work...and I suppose you want it tomorrow?...like every other b...Hey Steve! just had an idea. What if I were to position myself as "The Copy Nazi" - you know...like "The Soup Nazi" out of "Seinfeld". "No copy for you!"..."Get off my WSO!" - like that. You think the punters would go for it?

Tomorrow? Nah. Thursday will be fine

Gotta love Seinfeld. But I reckon Larry David would be a better fit.

[methomas]

Malcolm,

Great post and sales pitch.

Very entertaining while supplying a ton of very good information.

M E

[Imran Naseem]

How long is this offer available?

[WinsonYeung]

Mal has been great with my WSO order !!!
Excellent customer support and top quality work so far.

Looking forward my final sale copy

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by WinsonYeung

Mal has been great with my WSO order !!!
Excellent customer support and top quality work so far.

Looking forward my final sale copy

You can see his WSO copy here - http://www.warriorforum.com/warrior-...mbies-out.html That's what these crafty buggers are doing to me - getting me to adapt their site salespage to their WSO page. Yeah...this WSO price has got to go up pretty soon. Before I burn out. I'm working on 4 other Warriors copy at the mo. As well as my own stuff and copy for civilians at $2500 a salespage. BTW you should see what I've just done for Steve Fullman. Copywriting award coming up methinks. Yeah...I'm becoming an arrogant son-of-a-bitch. Maybe I'm channelling Halbert.

[The Copy Nazi]

Crikey! Check this out. Kern just sent it to me. Now you can make your own cable TV Ads - for peanuts. Using Public Domain clips. I'm all over this!

http://masscontrolsite.com/blog/?p=71

[chersern]

Hi,

Is this WSO still available? How much extra for a series of autoresponders?

Thanks
John

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by chersern

Hi,

Is this WSO still available? How much extra for a series of autoresponders?

Thanks
John

John. Yes. For now. I'd have to see what you've got before I can quote on an autoresponder series. But I'll tell you this - even Frank Kern opens my emails AND responds to them. And here's a tip I'll give you for nothing - forget about sending people long, boring-ass autoresponder emails. Nobody reads that sh*t. The trick is to have a catchy title so that they at least open the thing. Then just a FEW lines and then link out to longer copy. We're all too busy to read all these long emails that bozos are hitting us with every day - you're just inviting people to unsubscribe when you do that.

And another tip - write the email as if you're emailing your best friend. So you wouldn't do this -

"Exciting news from WidgetCorp"...."We at WidgetCorp are pleased to announce that we have a revolutionary widget that will save you hundreds of hours and is truly amazing and we've been testing it in our labs and we got so excited about it we just had to email you to tell you. I'm sure you'll agree after looking at our latest product that we've truly broken the boundaries on widget design this time. If you order now you'll be eligible for our Special March discount of 10% on orders over $1000. Thank you for your valuable custom. We value you as a client. Did you know that over 10,000 happy campers use our widgets daily?

Instead you might say

Dude - this is awesome!....Check this out. Those bozos at WidgetCorp have dropped the ball and are selling their BlueWidgets at just $10. Jump on it before the other guy. later Dude...

PM me and we'll do the Chicken Dance. Mal.

[The Copy Nazi]

Originally Posted by Imran Naseem

How long is this offer available?

Imran, until I burn out. Thing is, I'm not just doing pages for Warriors at this massive discount - I'm doing my usual stuff for civilians at at least $2500 a salespage. Things are getting pretty hectic so I've either got to take longer to do these WSOs or put my price up - or drop them altogether. But even then, I'll be flat out keeping up with it. My advice - pony up the grand now and sit on it until you're ready. I'll honour the price - even if I start doing salespages for $10k or something.

[Scott Million]

Do you provide the split test headlines? What do you recommend for testing?