28 replies
  • WEB DESIGN
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I have designed a few landing pages...please give some constructive critism. I want to improve my skills

Dbol-X
My Shopping Genie

thanks
#design #review
  • Profile picture of the author TheFreebieGuy
    I also think you did a great job there. It's very focused with a clear call to action. You clearly show the benefits and what they will receive when they buy, and it almosts jumps off the screen and into your face (especially the first one).

    Good job!
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  • Profile picture of the author Tech Diva
    Hi there!

    Awesome. You are answering the 3 critical questions I need to have answered to engage with your site:

    - Where am I?
    - What can I do/get/buy here?
    - Why would I want to?

    For the Dbox-X site, I am loving the design and the way you've organized it because I can only do one thing here: order now by clicking the orange button. I know what to do and why. The testimonial is the only thing I was going to mention would be helpful--and then I saw it. The text size is hard to read with the contrast of the white and the dark background and the spacing of the letterforms. Can you add spacing around the letters and perhaps bump up a point or two?

    On My shopping Genie, can you make the background of the top "Get the Free App Now" button green like the lower button? Would make it stand out more immediately to me. "Now" in all caps and italicized may be good; also, incorporating more of those hand-drawn orange arrows adds to the organic--and therefore noticeable--feel of the elements. Maybe reduce the size of the logo because, at this point, I don't know what that is so it doesn't give me as much value as "Instantly Find the Best Bargains"...and how about "How YOU can find the best bargains online in less than 45 seconds" for a tagline? More specificity makes it feel more "real". Who is your target market--women? men? mothers? career woman? What are they buying? "How you can buy brand name shoes at the LOWEST prices in less than 45 seconds..."

    Good work!
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  • Profile picture of the author DaWebmaster
    Very neat web designs, I like them. Keep up the good work.
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  • Profile picture of the author promo_guy
    I think Tech Diva makes some good points.

    I'd say overall you're on your way as the colours used aren't too bad but, if I may be critical, I'd like to offer my opinions.

    The DBOL-X Site:

    1) Try to make the background more consistent. It takes away from the professionalism of a site if a large background pic repeats like that. Plus, there's a large black box on the bottom left. Can you get rid of that?

    2) Try to avoid using lots of different fonts. Tie the site together with only a few if possible.

    3) See if you can make your navigation buttons an unordered list using display:inline; in your CSS (if you haven't already). Maybe put at the top of the site and darker (ie not orange) with white font? The navigation is one of the least important elements on a salespage in my opinion. That's why you see so many sales pages with the links at the very bottom, they're there if needed but not part of, or mixed in, with the design elements. Not saying this is always the case but I'd put links like "Articles" and "Contact" either at the footer or top of the header. (that's just my opinion)

    4) Try to segment each design element into what is most important (visually) so you don't have so many competing elements. For example, is the "Order Now" button most important? If so, maybe make the blue arrow smaller, or give more breathing room between your elements. Use your graphics to visually guide the viewer to where you want them to go. Remember, contrast stands out most, similarities blend things together. One suggestion is to make your "Order Now" button more that yellow colour like the "Buy 3 Get 1 Free" image, in other words, swap the colour schemes of those two elements and see how it looks. Your "Order Now" button is similar in colour to your orangey nav bar below it so if that contrasted more by being yellow, then the most important element (call to action) would "pop" in my opinion.

    5) Consider making it a slightly longer sales page so all elements aren't "crammed" into the current layout.

    6) Testimonials could have their own section and whilst important for "social proof" could be considered a "3rd" important element, ie important but not as important as the title/sales message, calls to action, etc.

    7) Personally, I'd sacrifice the background image for higher quality images of the product (the bottles) and possibly the images of the bodybuilders. They look grainy. Crisp, clean images almost always impress the viewer (which may keep them on the site longer).

    8) Make sure your boxes all have the same 2-4 pixels of spacing between them. It's a minor thing but will give the overall layout a more pro feel.

    Overall, I'd say it's a good start and many of the things I mentioned are very quick jobs in Photoshop. Adjusting a few colours, adding a little more spacing between elements, tightening everything up by aligning all elements, better quality pics etc. would improve what you've already started.

    Hope some of this critique was helpful.

    Good luck

    Scott
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  • Profile picture of the author brandasaur
    Wow! Thanks for the reviews. Will take all of that to improve my skills. Sometimes i can't do what i want because the client disagrees specially with colors

    Great great! I'm not that good in coding, still learning but will get on there soon Just leave the code for now i know it's a mess lol

    Thanks tech_diva and promo_guy
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  • Profile picture of the author brandasaur
    which one looks better? this is a flyer i did earlier for a client.




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  • Profile picture of the author promo_guy
    Hey brandasaur I know exactly what you mean about clients wanting this or that lol. That's part of being a designer. Also, I think it's a heck of a lot better than most people's stuff.

    My critique was just my opinion but I know it's helpful to get constructive criticism as opposed to "that's great". Good or bad, it's nice to get people to say "why" they like this, don't like that, etc.

    Now, in terms of your 2 banners above, I like second one for sure. The red contrasts with the green and my eye immediately goes to the red areas. Remember, contrast makes things appear closer, similarities push things back so, those elements you want to "pop" should be somewhat contrasty. Just something to think about.

    So, in my opinion, from most important 1-2-3 would be:

    [ FIRST ]

    Credit Issues?
    Bank Turndowns?
    1st Time Buyer?
    We Can Help!

    (try these in a red font?)

    [ SECOND ]

    Ask For Steve Hathaway

    - I'd put Steve's phone number under his title (ie under Sales Manager/Credit Specialist) and have his phone number possibly larger than his name, or around the same size but bigger than Sales Manager/etc. You want it obvious to know how to contact Steve without having to search for a phone number.

    - Also, maybe move the actual street address underneath Oneill's Wheels and above Lucky Deals Every Day. Just a thought but it would also give you room to make his phone number VERY prominent since that's a Call To Action.

    [ THIRD ]

    Bullet Points

    - Pretty good as they are. See how they look if you test what I mention above. Or, if you use the red font on the left, maybe use the green arrows so the red bullet points don't compete.

    Anyway, so far so good. Hope this might help a little.

    Good luck

    Scott
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  • Profile picture of the author kkoechel
    I hate loud autostarts, so that got Alt+f4 before i even cared to look at it... hopefully it works for the people who are not like me.

    the muscle site is great and will convert
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  • Profile picture of the author eallison.taylor
    Great art of work. Keep it up.
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  • Profile picture of the author iforgotbetter
    Neat clean design i like it, keep up the good work!
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  • Profile picture of the author PaulKennedy
    I like the most the flyer with red because it attract more attention.
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  • Profile picture of the author jaxspotmedia
    My favorite is the first website you did.

    Its very straight to the point and a nice design.

    As for the poster, I like the 2nd version better.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kysersoze
    That's a good looking design!
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  • Profile picture of the author JeedoAquino
    Hi Bran,

    Your designs look good. Fellow pinoy here and just starting out. A question, are these working wordpress themes or just plain html files?

    Would like to add a thought as well, have you tried split testing? I notice most sites have forms right on the front page where a potential customer can order right away. This might help with your conversions.
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  • Profile picture of the author wondergirlseo
    Originally Posted by brandasaur View Post

    I have designed a few landing pages...please give some constructive critism. I want to improve my skills


    thanks

    They are very close to the converting pages that I've seen.

    I especially like the shopping genie one....
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  • Profile picture of the author brandasaur
    Thanks for the reviews guys. I'll keep on improving my skills and update you soon with more designs
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  • Profile picture of the author esquiree
    i think u need like geotrust or sitelock or somethink like that
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  • Profile picture of the author Bob Phantom
    Thought both of them were quite nice

    First one is better designed in my opinion
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  • Profile picture of the author logoonlinepros1
    Good work! I like your creative landing page design work but you need to use less images on it.
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  • Profile picture of the author kooldesigning
    Landing page design is great! contents are strategically arranged. But don't you think white background or light color background will be impressive ?
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    • Profile picture of the author fusedroots
      Hi brandasaur,

      I have to say that I really do like your designs and they certainly have huge potential to convert.

      I would have to agree with a lot of people who have replied to your post that there are only a few small changes which boost the overall look of the page.

      If I were to give you constructive advice on what I would personally change it would be as follows:

      dbol-x

      I like the big orange button at the top as it's clear to me what I have to do and where I have to go.
      The size of the 'buy 3 get 1 free' is great and that's what draws my eye straight to that corner.
      The white writing on the tagline needs a little more space between letters so its easier to read. Also the red writing in the box could use a little more spacing.


      genie

      This design I think stands out a little more for me as it's fresher and cleaner. It has a web 2.0 look about it and has great colours throughout.
      I like the bit of inner shadow on the 'Get the free app now' and I think it would work well on the 'release the power of my shopping genie'.

      I understand what you mean about having restrictions when it comes to designing sites for clients. Sometimes us designers have explosions of ideas but we have to give the client what they want.

      As for the 2 flyers, I would go with the red. I think the red is a great contrasting colour and gives the design more depth.

      Keep up the good work and I look forward to seeing more.

      Ps.. I really like the O'neils Wheels design by the way.
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  • Profile picture of the author michael scott
    really good so far. But I seem to be having a hard time reading the body text for this one: Dbol-X. or maybe it's just me?
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    • Profile picture of the author PHIMind
      same problem here. i think the white background with the brown letters make it a bit hard to read.

      on the genie one don´t make the video auto-run. it was playing before i noticed since i was reading the other info.
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  • Profile picture of the author afam4eva
    Great looking websites. If i may ask did you use any e-commerce software for the shopping cart?
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  • Profile picture of the author iZame
    You have the right idea on 'My Shopping Genie'. You went with a simple design and got straight to the point. Dbol-X looks a little sketchy. I think if you change the background to a dark grey to black gradient, it would look way better.

    Overall, good job! Keep up the nice work!
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  • Profile picture of the author WillR
    Originally Posted by brandasaur View Post

    I have designed a few landing pages...please give some constructive critism. I want to improve my skills

    Dbol-X
    My Shopping Genie

    thanks
    I like the first one however the 'My Shopping Genie' page is too cluttered and doesn't have enough distinction between the different elements. For a landing page to work well you need the visitors eyes to be trained on only ONE thing the moment they hit the page - usually this will be your headline.

    On the 'My Shopping Genie' page my eyes didn't know where to look and it was too much work to read.

    A good way to test your pages is to open them up on your browser and then go and stand right across the other side of your room, enough distance so that the computer screen looks a little fuzzy. From this distance you should be able to see ONE thing stand out on your page above all the rest and it should be your headline. If this is not the case or something else stands out more, then you need to go back to the drawing board and edit your design.
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