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Focus: We All Have A Past To Forget

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Posted 20th February 2011 at 01:53 PM by AlexPK

With all the information overload, I continue to evolve. I am thankful for the huge opportunity of the platform that I am currently now testing with a portion of the investment capital I mentioned that I raised in my last post.

I suppose that having all the information I have, I will focus since I am able to do more now.

My youngest broke a bone in his arm and fractured his elbow a week ago. He's six years old and I am really impressed by the way he endured the pain for the 6 to 7 hours until he got into the operation theatre with the doctor to get the cast on.

As a parent I was thankful that we could be there with him. No more having to rush off to a meeting or to get something done by the end of the day for a boss. This was one moment where I truly appreciated the new life that I have really focussed on designing and living. That other stuff is now a thing of the past. I am now able to start living more and more of my dream where I get to be there for my family - and to bond and really create shared experiences - and to actually get to know each one of them as individuals.

In addition to that I have to say that I am also truly in gratitude that we have some insurance coverage and also have the cashflow to pay for the extra expenses.

A couple of high calibre experts in business, both offline and online, have strong suggestions that as a foundational part of my business, I revisit my past life and really examine as many of the events as closely as possible.

The trouble with my life is that it is one where the last 15 to wow, 23 years has been sprinkled with highly negative and emotionally stressful moments in my personal life. To myself anyway - and at times I guess I downplay just how stressful it is - and it really doesn't matter whether it is considered 'serious enough' by some people's standards, if the circumstances were stressful to me, it was affecting me negatively and it is only now that I can truly see things changing remarkably for a truly better financial and life circumstance.

Well, it has been 23 years and I turn 40 at the end of this year. In many ways I am glad I endured - never succumbing to giving up completely - on which there were two occasions I recall seriously considering.

There have been such times - with very powerful parents who were very influential socially and politically - and both who are ego and pride driven - I was reminded on many occasion how whatever it was I am doing was not and is not good enough....compared to so many people they get to meet in their circles.

Sure, they came from extremely poor childhoods and during that time so did the majority of their generation. And I suppose they were 'lucky' enough to survive WW2 and get to live the lives they lived with the opportunities they got and then to provide such a great life for me.

Not doing 'well enough' through school and university, I was just average and even through university it was an ongoing too many years off being unable to get what it was all about - maybe I was just too immature...

I was unemployable in my legal industry as it was very competitive and no senior lawyer wanted to mentor me that closely...and I still didn't really get my own industry in legal practice! I can tell you I felt out of sorts on so many occasions. Plus, I just disliked it. I also never knew that getting out of university meant starting with such low pay and competing in a industry where you had organisational politics immediately.

Even now, given the choice to go back to legal practice I would not.

Yeah, thinking back on my past was kind of lame. I look like a cop out.

I always wondered why other people seemed to know so much more than I did about stuff you don't learn or needed to know in university....

I am not blaming anything but just getting clarity on the cards I was dealt.

To some my life would have been pretty lame. I did not apply myself fully to take on the opportunities I had and perhaps I kept making excuses in an occupation I had no passion for.

Hmm, this exercise to look back is not fun and I didn't think it would be. I don't think there are any real profound or strong lessons in it for anyone to learn from...at least none that I can see as yet.

Well, he asks me to go deeper and to think in more ways....so I continue revisiting and examining my journey so far.

Thankfully though I have reached breakthrough in financial cashflow. More to come...
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