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Learning to fill in the holes

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Posted 29th March 2014 at 07:11 AM by Jeremy Barker

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Woke up this morning with a thought that we all no doubt go through at some point in our lives and unless someone is completely emotionless, it happens more than one time.

Whether we admit it or not, humans are an emotion driven species with everyone being at a different level of how deep their emotions affect their lives. Each individual life has different areas that seem to be the major focus of their lives at a certain point and we are all at different points. The major area of "thought" and focus in one's life is the area at a particular time that is felt as "missing something" in a life. In my opinion, this hole in one's life comes for one of two reasons:

1) A single very hard impact

2) A lot of pressure over time



Let's change directions for a second. How is a pothole created in a road? Either from a very hard impact on an area of the road or pressure over time that ends up breaking down the pavement and the foundation of the road and a hole is created, right? What happens when a pothole is created? We must drive slower and dodge this hole in order to minimize damage to our vehicles.

Same thing in life. A hole in ourselves is created and for the short term we do everything we can to dodge that hole and we slow our lives down to a certain extent in order to minimize damage from this hole that has been created.

In my personal opinion, there are a couple of areas that have to be taken care of in our lives in order to fill these holes and without it, we have something missing within ourselves. These areas could be on different levels for different people but they are:

1) Success

2) Love

3) Happiness

These areas play off of each other and if one is out of sync, all can be affected. Success, Love, and Happiness can be all over the place. What I feel I need to be happy is different than what you feel you need to be happy. Same for love and success. If there is a hole, we get to the point where we try to fill it. By trying to fill it, we put ourselves in a vulnerable situation. The walls that we build from "dodging" the holes have to be taken down and sometimes this is hard. But if we don't take those walls down, can we ever really fill these three areas? That's a matter of opinion but I don't think we can.

This is definitely an ongoing "life lesson" that will never be fully figured out but there is one thing that we can do. Work on filling these holes. Determine what success means to YOU, determine how happiness would be defined by YOU, determine what love means to YOU. There is a path that you need to take to make your definition of success happen, a path that you need to take to create your definition of happiness, and someone out there that can help to define what love actually is in your life.

When all 3 holes are filled, there is a state of happiness that I believe all can reach if we try to stay focused, try to stay on task, and let life happen. This can be tough though when you see yourself needing certain things and there are areas that you can't necessarily snap your fingers and change in an instant.

If you keep those walls up, you will miss the things that come into your life to fill these holes. Then what?

Life Lessons Learned!
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