Need help improving clickbank diet program sales page

UX - So what do i get for signing up? 80 videos....is it a members only section where we can ask questions, are you sort of like my personal trainer? Can i message you with questions?

Any links to the actual testimonials / facebook reviews or something similar I can read to add a level of trust?

400 visits - where did they come from; email, organic, ppc? Are they targeted visitors?

A few comments after a very quick look:

1. Who exactly are these thousands of people you mention in your headline or is that just marketing speak? You only list a handful of reviews - not thousands.

2.Where is the "actual science" you mention? Do you have links to research studies? You may not necessarily need the links but if you push "actual science" you better be able to prove it.

3. All-in-one products are tough to sell. I don't want to hear about high carb, low fat, gluten free, vegan (all those guys are weirdos), difference between protein/fats/carbohydrates (BORING!), etc.

What I want is to get rid of this roll around my belly that will not budge. And I want to do it without sweating, without interrupting my day, without cardboard food, or any of that junk. I just want it gone.

Likewise, Sally doesn't want to hear about all that. She is trying to get some muscles or whatever she needs to boost her boobs without surgery.

We didn't see anything on your site that would help us. So we left - that is we didn't convert to anything.

There is a place for all-in-one type topics. If yours isn't working, maybe niche it down a little or a lot.

Mark

You don't have to link to the studies but can list them like this person does: Turbulence Training

You don't have to lie to market. If you decide to niche it down, figure out what your market wants or needs badly enough to buy your program today.

Explain your program in a way that helps them to know the answers are included. My problem could be addressed with some minor changes to the sales page if I was your target market.

If your target market was Sally, her problem could also be addressed with some minor changes.

Not lies. Nothing fake. The same thing you are selling now but explained in a way that a particular group of people would have a desire to buy.

Mark

I agree with Mark Singletary, everyone is going to have their own outcomes and drive for buying a program like this. You need to target those who are likely to buy this.

You already have a great sales record on udemy so hopefully that has given you enough data to understand who your ideal customer is.

Hits or unique visitors? A hit is not a big deal, it just means something loaded from your server, be it a css file, php file, video, image etc they all count as a hit.
When your first starting out you should normally have the lowest conversion rate as Google decides what you are really about. If you are buying your customers work on negative keywords or defiantly refine your list.
I can see all sorts of little tweaks I would make to the design to increase read through and conversion, keep working on it.
Make sure you have something people want to spend money on.

You need a pop-up to get your customer contact information then following up them through your sales funnel.

Hello Felix,

Let me give you a FULL disclaimer first ...

Copywriting is not mathematics. There isn't a formula that if you use, you're going to find exactly why a website is not converting. To fully understand this it takes research into your customer avatar and most importantly, your traffic source.

In 9 out of 10 cases, products don't sell because the traffic that sees the offer is not a logical choice towards receiving a particular offer.

With that in mind, let's take a look over your sales page, shall we?

Your first mistake is making claims without backing them up. When you say something like "backed by science and research" but you're not saying WHAT science and research, you're better off not making the claim at all.

This is because you've automatically raised an objection.

It's like me saying to my friends ...

"I'm sleeping with a different girl each night".

They'll all scream in unison "prove it".

This is a beginner mistake and I've seen it in so many VSLs. If you make a claim that is not universally accepted, back it up with some proof. Even if the proof is hardly bulletproof (no pun intended), it is better than nothing, makes sense?

Your super skinny example will raise the second objection. The problem with your market is that they want to LOSE weight, not gain it. They consider themselves to have bad genes and metabolism and yet, you come here, virtually pushing a finger in their face and tell them that you had a very fast metabolism (implied) and that you were super skinny.

Which would be great ... if you'd actually sell this to people who are skinny and who are tired of looking like a punk rock goth emo kid but not so good when selling to those who want to lose weight.

Remember what I've told you earlier?

"In 9 out of 10 cases, products don't sell because the traffic that sees the offer is not a logical choice towards receiving a particular offer."

Do you see how it connects?

It's just that you're taking suspension of disbelief way too far. Even if you've got fat after, weren't you skinny to begin with? This means that you would be able to lose fat rather easily which kills your entire argument.

You see Felix, most people think that copywriting is this complex, hypnotic thing where just the right words and the right arguments can transform a highly skeptical person into a groupie.

It's not like that. It must make sense. As Ogilvy said many times "don't think your prospect is stupid because your prospect may be your wife". And while VSLs are not known for their air-tight logical arguments (check what works on ClickBank, you'd be amazed at what plot holes are there) - they must make sense at the end and not raise objections.

Nobody is expecting your argument to withstand a cross interaction like case but while the sale is made on an emotional level, incongruence and logical mistakes will kill it long before emotions can do their things.

And this is the problem I see with most copywriters.

They take the 3X formula or the velociraptor formula or any other formula (there are quite a few) and they follow it to the letter. But the problem is that you can paint a copy by numbers with "benefits here, show similar frustrations here, sad story here" and it will look great in theory but in practice, it won't be a cohesive, persuasive argument.

The other main problem with your VSL is that you don't really have an USP. You don't have a clear problem that you resolve in a very clear manner and that enables them to achieve a desired benefit. It's weight loss but you're kind of making the same claims and arguments as the last ten VSLs they've read. This is not necessarily bad but differentiating yourself from what others say in what is truly a top three competitive market (biz op / dieting / dating) is a good idea.

My final review is this.

You don't look like a guy who has been struggling from a fitness point of view. The way you're built tells me (an uneducated eye) that you have good genes.

Maybe this is true, maybe it's not but your prospect is likely to agree with me. And this should work in your advantage. Say you're a fitness trainer, say that you've been born with good genes and you've helped clients for the last five years in the gym - don't go with this story of being skinny and then being fat and then being fit because you're alienating your market and nobody is believing you.

Do I believe you? Yes. I was very skinny - hardly could put any weight (I had 55 kilograms at 1.83m) and now I have 76 kilograms and I am running daily as I've put fat too. But I know this, not your prospect and because of this, because it sounds so unlikely, it is like a land mine ready to explode in your face.

Make it congruent - make it logical - make it like you're sitting in a bar with your prospect and having a beer with him not like this is The X Files. Your goal is to be credible first and foremost. Your goal is to be like Seinfield, easy to relate to - not Christian Grey from Fifty Shades of Grey.

I hope this answered your questions. I'm sorry if I came across too critical, sometimes I emphasize some points a bit too much for my own sake.

1. 400 hits is not such a big number. It really depends on the type of traffic. Was it "cold traffic"? Were they people what just clicked an ad and got on your website for the first time?

Or were they highly targeted customers that were first introduced to your product, the pre-sold, and only then they got to the website. In this case you should expect 3-4 sales per 400 visits. But only if the traffic was well targeted and they were prepared very well before selling anything.

2. You begin the video by telling people about the program, and then you're telling things about yourself. But what's in it for the visitors? What they will get from all of this? All good sales pages or videos begin by presenting a PROBLEM.

What's the biggest problem that your ideal customer has? Are they fat and want to lose weight? Or maybe they are skinny and want to gain muscle?

Present the problem in details so that people find themselves in that situation, and then offer a SOLUTION to that problem.