fivver failed so I tried myself reveiw my Press Release

20 replies
Fellow Warriors, I tried to buy a press release from 2 different fivvers gigs and both of them were incoherent. I put this one together. What do you think? Do I need to hire a professional?


The Food Storage Project Presents the Best Emergency Food Storage Monthly Subscription Plans

Sub-headline:
TheFoodStorageProject.com is helping people to build their emergency food storage supply by offering emergency food storage subscription boxes at affordable rates.

El Paso, Texas (August 1, 2016) -The Food Storage Project simplifies the process of building an emergency food storage supply. The emergency food subscription plan ships the chosen preconfigured box to the customer each month. Choosing the plan that fits one’s budget allows customers to start building their emergency food storage at their own pace. Receiving the monthly subscription box at your doorstep is a hassle-free process.

The Food Storage Project has come up with subscription plans which customers can choose from based on their needs and budget. The bronze plan (72-hour kit) costs $45 per month, the silver plan (7-day kit) costs $75 per month and the Gold plan (1-month kit) costs $99 per month.

The freeze-dried and dehydrated pouches are perfect in enabling customers to enjoy great tasting meals. The packets are ready with the food and needs only water to prepare the meal. Utilizing freeze-dried and dehydrated food take the hassle out of preparing meals from one’s emergency food stores. There are no new recipes to learn and specialized tools needed. The food can even be prepared in their pouches. The emergency food storage kits have a 25 year shelf life, so you know that your supply will last.

About TheFoodStorageProject.Com
TheFoodStorageProject.Com is one of the best online platforms for helping the average person build an emergency food storage with subscription plans for their convenience and budget.

To know more, please visit The Food Storage Project – Empowing you to build your food Storage on a Budget

Contact
The Food Storage Project
4924 Pikes Peak Dr.
El Paso, TX 79904
Email: info@thefoodstorageproject.com.com
Call: 915-208-4111

###
#failed #fivver #press #release #reveiw
  • Profile picture of the author 1Bryan
    All you have is a generic "Who we are" kind of release which ain't gonna get noticed. A press release, if it's going to actually do anything for you?

    Has to sell a story.

    There has to be a story there that's worth covering.

    And you have to sell that story to whomever is going to be the best possible person to come across it.

    Generally, I already know WHO (which news reporter) I am trying to "bait" when I write a release.

    Until you figure that out?

    I couldn't help you at all.

    Funny thing is ... if you did have that figured out?

    You wouldn't need any help.

    P.S. If you truly wanna understand the "media game" ... grab Trust Me, I'm Lying by Ryan Holiday.

    He broke it down pretty well.

    If you are trying to plant a story and get real coverage, you always have to have at least some idea of who (the reporter, the blog, whatever) you are trying to bait into covering it.

    Otherwise?

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10793282].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbishop
    1bryan

    I am trying to get covered by LDS blogs/websites. one example is LDS Daily | News, FHE Lessons, Entertainment & More

    I am trying to tap the "I know I should have food storage, butI do not have the time" group

    Do you know of an example press release I could model?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10793495].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author 1Bryan
    No. I don't have an example. The way I write releases is very individualistic. Like I said, I already know WHO (which reporter) I am writing to.

    But ...

    Maybe a press release isn't the best route for you.

    Maybe partnering up with folks who already have an audience in that space (LDS) would be a better way to go.

    Maybe even providing some content for them to put on their site would be better.

    If you can partner up in some way, where they have an incentive to talk about your service - they are more likely to talk about it more often.

    It might be the difference between being talked about once ... and being talked about multiple times.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10794420].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    trying to tap the "I know I should have food storage, butI do not have the time" group
    Is there such a "group"? I see a "buy monthly frood" - no mention of food quality/taste or of "use by" dates. No mention of WHY someone would be buying for "food storage". You need to do some research on 'preppers' and on the multitude of companies selling supplies - including food - to these folks.
    Signature
    Every child needs a pet because every family needs an optimist

    Saving one dog will not save the world....but will forever change the world for one dog.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10794551].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Mark Singletary
      Kay,

      The LDS (Mormon) church teaches members to have a supply of food and other essentials in case of emergency.

      They aren't "preppers" in the sense that they are preparing for the FEMA camps or martial law or other typical reasons many preppers use for having emergency food. They are doing it more out of common sense but also including any kind of disaster. If dad loses his job or mom has to have a transplant or there is a hurricane or whatever, they can make ends meet until everything gets sorted.

      Sbishop,

      I think you have a lot of work to be done on your site. I saw several misspellings and none of the copy is persuasive (makes me want to buy). Also, it appears your payment form is not secure but you are asking for CC details. Some of the information Kay mentioned would be nice to include as well. One thing that many of the food storage companies don't provide is nutritional information. These days with gluten intolerance, diabetes, etc. at all time highs knowing what is in the food we buy is important.

      My impression of most of the LDS blogs are that they are run by regular folks and you can just email them (don't spam). For example, the site you mentioned above, has a link on the bottom that says contact them if you have something worthy of sharing. Of course, I could be wrong but it may not hurt to make a few contacts and see what happens.

      Mark

      Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

      Is there such a "group"? I see a "buy monthly frood" - no mention of food quality/taste or of "use by" dates. No mention of WHY someone would be buying for "food storage". You need to do some research on 'preppers' and on the multitude of companies selling supplies - including food - to these folks.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10794853].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbishop
    First of all, I am LDS and I have been taught from my childhood that I should be self sufficient. A part of that is to have a years food supply. So, as of right now I personally do not have a years food supply. That is where the idea came from, over the years my wife and I have bought cans of beans, rice wheat, oats, etc. I do not know how to make a meal out of what we have right now.

    The name The Food Storage Project is meant to show empathy and that I am here to help you do what you know you are supposed to be doing. It is also to invite people to join me on my journey to build up my food supply. Everything is based on making things as simple as possible:

    1-the food is freeze dried. you just add water(it does not even have to be hot) No need to learn a new way to cook when the need arises to pull out the food storage.

    2-The kits clearly state how much food is in each kit. No trying to figure out how many servings of rice are in the can. IF you have 12 of the 1 month kits you know that you have a years worth of food for 1 person. Each Mylar pouch states how many servings it provides for preparing meals.

    3. Autopilot. Set it and forget it. Most people can not just buy a few thousand dollars of food at one time and say done, I have a years supply for my family of four. We have set goals and started buying a set amount each month, but be cause we had to do it manually, we have never been consistent. We best we did was when a member at church would organize monthly orders, but as soon as she stopped reminding us each month we stopped buy more.

    The reason I was writing a press release was to send to the lds blogs. as a way to introduce my business and hopefully get the to post about what I am doing.

    -1bryan Thanks for your input. I am looking into an affiliate program to offer the blog owners so they make a commission off of signups.

    -Mark Thanks for you input. I need to have my sister proof read the site, she is an English teacher. There are gluten free and vegan options, but my goal was to start off basic and if I can make this work i'll expand the options. Right now I have everything set up with drop shipping, so I only have to collect the payment and place the order. To add the other options I would have to do everything in house.

    I have been thinking of making a video introducing my self and telling my story of struggles to build up my food storage. I also ordered a 72hr food kit and I want to do a video of me getting the first kit and invite people to join me on this journey... or something like that.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10794930].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Mark Singletary
    I love the idea. I think it is unique enough and important enough to church members that you might have a chance to make it go. What's lacking, in my opinion, is the presentation/marketing.

    Since you are LDS you should be able to relate to the target market and the struggles with doing this. Your pages need to hit the pain points. For example, there is guilt at knowing what has been taught and knowing what needs to happen but just not doing it due to time or money. Some other things to consider addressing are space used, how this system compares to just buying it at Walmart or a bulk warehouse, how it compares to the church's own food they sell, etc.

    I mentioned the gluten thing only as an example of people - even those without special dietary needs - wanting to know what is in the things they are buying.

    Good luck with your project.

    Mark
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10794952].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbishop
    I guess I was trying to set up the site to be the store and add a blog to tell the story.

    Should I tell the story first and put the store on the side the plan being that the story will drive people to the store?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10795028].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author JohnBarron
      Originally Posted by sbishop View Post

      I guess I was trying to set up the site to be the store and add a blog to tell the story.

      Should I tell the story first and put the store on the side the plan being that the story will drive people to the store?

      Maybe it's me, but I don't see how what you're doing is newsworthy.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10795049].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author 1Bryan
        Originally Posted by JohnBarron View Post

        Maybe it's me, but I don't see how what you're doing is newsworthy.
        It is if it's told correctly and to the right audience. It's a service that would be appreciated. How big that audience is? I don't know. It'd be a subset of the LDS audience, not the whole LDS audience.

        The ones who already have a supply ... the ones who know what to do with their supply ... or the ones who are just going to keep putting it off ...

        It's not for them.

        So you'd have to screen those out or just accept that they aren't going to be receptive or whatever.

        But told right?

        Any business that relates to folks who have a strong faith and identify with that faith?

        It's newsworthy.

        Kinda like ...

        To most folks ... a new fishing supply shop opening up in an area ain't news.

        Because most don't fish and even of the ones who do?

        Most are just casual fishers.

        The ones who are die-hard about fishing?

        That shop opening up?

        Might be the best news they've gotten all year.

        P.S. OP? My friend's Mormon and his mom had a huge supply in their basement. But it was disorganized. It almost looked like a "hoarding" situation.

        Maybe producing some material (to be distributed) about organizing one's supply would get some blogs talking about you.

        Folks might not be as disorganized as my friend's mom was ... but would be a safe bet that the idea of "organizing" stuff would be something they'd think about ...

        And it could give you a little more "material" to produce and get distributed.

        If you could do video of that?

        Might scoop up some YouTube traffic or get some of those blogs to embed your video on their site and get in front of their audience that way. Video's a little more likely to get passed around on Facebook and such.

        You could probably come up with some infographics related to your site or the organizing of one's food supply ... Top 7 tips kind of articles ...

        But video and spreading it around social media - especially the combo of Facebook and YouTube ...

        I'd put some time in there.

        But make sure that site of yours?

        Tells someone that it's specifically for LDS right away.

        Like in the header.

        They should know as soon as they land on it that it's specifically for THEM.
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10795995].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author sbishop
          Originally Posted by 1Bryan View Post


          But make sure that site of yours?

          Tells someone that it's specifically for LDS right away.

          Like in the header.

          They should know as soon as they land on it that it's specifically for THEM.
          thanks for the ideas, but I am not sure that I want to limit myself to just the LDS market. There are others who may want to have an emergency food supply and could use the service.
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10796259].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author 1Bryan
            Originally Posted by sbishop View Post

            thanks for the ideas, but I am not sure that I want to limit myself to just the LDS market. There are others who may want to have an emergency food supply and could use the service.
            Classic mistake. You are already going after a broad market because you are afraid you might miss out on some sales.

            Guess what?

            By being broad like that?

            You are going to miss out on the LDS community. Instead of creating an offer "just for them" ...

            You are creating an offer for no one in particular.

            So ...

            I would advise against that.

            Especially in the beginning.

            How does anything get popular? It starts with a smaller market first. A comedian (Seinfeld) gets popular in NYC before the rest of the country. A rock group (Guns 'n' Roses) gets popular in LA before the rest of the country. A retailer (Walmart) gets popular in Arkansas before it takes over the world.

            I would start by becoming #1 in the LDS community. That would be my goal. My first 1,000 paying customers would be from that community. And then ... only if it made sense ... expand outward. But it's up to you.

            (I like proven business strategies.)

            Good luck!
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10796959].message }}
            • Profile picture of the author sbishop
              Originally Posted by 1Bryan View Post

              Classic mistake.....
              I would start by becoming #1 in the LDS community. That would be my goal. My first 1,000 paying customers would be from that community. And then ... only if it made sense ... expand outward. But it's up to you.

              (I like proven business strategies.)

              Good luck!
              I do see your point. I don'y have any customers and the lds market is the one I know the best...
              {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10797500].message }}
              • Profile picture of the author 1Bryan
                Originally Posted by sbishop View Post

                I do see your point. I don'y have any customers and the lds market is the one I know the best...
                There you go.

                What's more comfortable -

                Being offered something by someone just like you?

                Or

                Being sold something by an outsider who's just out for your money?



                P.S. The one caveat when you are the market you are selling to ... is that you have to still be willing to challenge some of your assumptions about who they are. As much as you are one of them? It's still a group of individuals and nobody's exactly alike. So you still have to talk with them, get feedback, maybe test different ways of communicating, etc, etc.
                {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10798503].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    I did not know that about LDS but if you expect to reach a broader market my comments stand.

    There are companies selling "stocking" food supplies and it has to be more than "buy monthly" - take some time and look through those sites. I don't know if any have a monthly order deal - that may be a hook you can use.

    However, I know the sites I've seen selling food stocks talk about quality and taste - about ease of use and shelf life.

    Preppers, campers, people living off the grid - could be customers but you have to sell the product to them.
    Signature
    Every child needs a pet because every family needs an optimist

    Saving one dog will not save the world....but will forever change the world for one dog.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10796282].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbishop
    So I am thinking of taking down the site and putting back up a pre-launch page. Then working on getting the site right. I did run a fb ad and sent over 100 people to the site with no sign ups.

    I have a fb page and have 20 likes. my family who live in different parts of the country have shared my page.

    I am thinking of putting up a video on the fb page to introduce me and my struggle with building my personal food storage. I just read the post http://www.warriorforum.com/social-m...in-1-week.html

    So, next I want to run a fb page like ad and try to build up my audience. Then I can relauch the website and hopefully get some sign ups.

    What do you think?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10799039].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author vovanfree
    I wander why fiverr sellers disappointed you. You can go on fiverr in press release gigs and find many people there. You can hire some good seller. Your story can be viral through email marketing. You should hire professional if you are really serious about your story.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10808902].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author yukon
      Banned
      Originally Posted by vovanfree View Post

      I wander why fiverr sellers disappointed you. You can go on fiverr in press release gigs and find many people there. You can hire some good seller. Your story can be viral through email marketing. You should hire professional if you are really serious about your story.
      What a joke.
      Signature
      Hi
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10808948].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author gingerninjas
    Press releases are your run of the mill content piece, it needs to be super persuasive and if the title doesn't jump out to the reader or in the first instance the editor who you want to run the PR then you are never going to get it published. You've already acknowledged there are some spelling errors and grammar which I am sure your sister can help with however writing a press release is more than the who, where, why, when it needs to grab the reader and encourage them to read more. While your idea is great and I am sure for a niche audience it will be well received, if you have a few versions of the release it might work well. Just tweak it based on the audience. Some audiences, myself included, won't be up to scratch with your religious beliefs or customs so you may need to add a bit of background and I would also add in a quote and a hook which really encapsulates why you need the reader to act. Wrap up the release with a CTA, website and some info and be aware that journalists or publications may not publish your contact info so you should include the website and details of where you are based throughout the press release as some publications have limitations for space. Good luck.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10809191].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbishop
    I'll post the incoherent press releases I got from 2 different fiver gigs if you want to see them. The press releases were how I was going to contact lds blogs an dother lds websites to try and get them to post about my new business.

    As far as Fiverr goes, I did find someone to record a script for a video that I made. He was great and I will be using his recording on the video. The video I made from rawshorts.com It is about "Molly Mormon" This name refers to the prefect member of the church. In the video, we meet molly who everyone thinks is perfect, but she has struggled with food storage until she finds thefoodstorageproject.com and signs up and is now building her food storage monthly. It then direct the viewer to the website to find out more.

    Everyone that I have show it to loves it. I hope it can bring in traffic and subscriptions
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[10810021].message }}

Trending Topics