Please review my failing landing page.

5 replies
My team and I recently created a landing page to launch our new tennis coaching service. We have gotten about 50 unique visitors a day on the landing page but 0 conversions. We think that it could partly be because of the navigation, pricing, sales copy, or lack there of. We would appreciate any feedback and critique.
Thanks in advance.

RacquetFlex Stroke Analysis
#failing #landing #page #review
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  • Profile picture of the author DWolfe
    This is not to be harsh but if I'm about to poney up about a grand. This is what I see wrong below.

    First question comes to mind who are you ? Are you tennis stars ? Are you coaches ? Your asking $997.00 for a stroke analysis, yet I have no idea about who is asking and no trust factor has been established.

    Just my .02 but it needs work.

    And other thing when clicking your link, it is slow to load. Then 2 videos look like they start to load. Yet only one is there. Is that a glitch with the site ?
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  • Profile picture of the author Wile E Coyote
    In general, the higher the price of the product/service you're trying to sell, the more sales copy or persuasion that is needed in order to convert.

    Your sales copy can be summed up in maybe 2 short paragraphs.

    The video has no sound for me, not sure if that's intentional.

    The price point really needs to be looked at since your target audience probably isn't professional or semi-professional tennis players, as they would already have coaches or some sort of support around them already.

    So who are you targetting? What benefit would they have? I think you just need to flesh out your demo a bit better and provide a reasonable service to those members.

    Also, there's no security badges or copy to make the buyer comfortable on the order form. $997.00 is a lot to just randomly put in a credit card for, with no guarantee, no trust seals etc.

    In addition, on your order form, you have the following options:
    * I am over the age of 12
    * I have 7+ hours per week to train
    * I have no current/recent injuries

    This should probably be moved into more of a lead-generation model.

    This goes right back to figuring out your demo.

    How many tennis players out there are practicing +7 hours a week who don't already have support around them to fix their swings/strokes? I don't know, since this isn't me.

    One thought is to allow them to submit a video for free for a quick review, since that really pushes the commitment level, then break down your analysis into a couple of stages... a free analysis section that allows them to get good advice (like a lead magnet) and then a couple of paid options in order to really improve.

    Just my nickel.
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  • Profile picture of the author savidge4
    #1 loose the pricing under the CTA button...that's just silly.

    #2 You do NOT have a 2 step close process... the payment page needs to be held off a bit

    #3 as mentioned you have not built nearly enough trust.. not even close

    #4 Im supposed to send you a video? of what?

    So why this is failing... you are TRYING to as it would be with cold calling " one call close " this.. and it is basically the wrong approach. your basically saying right now.. you don't know who we are.. here is kinda what we need drop $997 and lets go from there..

    You need to change this around. you NEED to be capturing e-mail address'. So you have a 4 step procedure in place already. Start with removing " send your stroke " to " get started now " and then drop them to your questionnaire that includes an E-Mail address. ( creating their account at the same time. )

    At this point they have invested time. At this point you can send them to the pricing page... and I am sure they will have access within the account to see the video information needed.

    You can now start dripping e-mails of sample reports... before and afters... a video on how to record... etc etc

    Right now you are getting them and loosing them as fast. by getting the info you need to continue the conversation you should be able to better sell your service and the detail that I am sure is included better.
    Success is an ACT not an idea
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    • Hi savidge4,

      Thanks for the critiques and insights of my landing page. Yes, I am quite embarrassed and aware of the lack of effort that went into the page.
      We are currently trying to implement the 2 step close process into our funnel.
      Before I invest money into my landing page, could you evaluate if this funnel is the proper way to go?

      1. Home Page > Landing Page > Free Demo > Purchase
      2. Home Page > Email Training Series > Hard Sale on Last Day > Landing Page > Free Demo > Purchase
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  • Profile picture of the author Copylifemike
    In addition to the comments - one easy fix to help you create a story would be to elaborate on your benefits..

    Permanent fix - HOW? How is this a permanent fix? How does a student get there and what issues will this fix? Where did this idea come from?

    Also - When it comes to "skills" there's no permanent fix for anything. Skills are perishable unless they are practiced diligently.

    So let's say they learn a skill for 6 months day in and day out. . They take a break for 2 months. When they go back to the sport are they going to start where they left off?

    99% chance, NO. They will need to practice to get back in that groove again.

    Personalized Instructions - How are these tailored to the student? What can they expect? What is the process to even get this benefit? Give them MORE information.

    Up to date Info compared to what? What practices are considered up to date?

    Tested and proven Tested against what? Who? When? How up to date is this information?

    BTW - these sound more like features.. How is this benefiting me?

    WHAT is the benefit of testing? What's the result?

    Features is what I'm getting.
    Benefits is the result of what I'm getting.

    All that's listed are features. There's no explanation as to exactly what I'm getting and WHY I should even choose you.

    Lose the price.

    The copy here sells more close to $20-40 packages.

    At $928 you need to do a hell of a lot better and make more effort stroking my pain points and desires to whip out my wallet and say OK.

    Never heard of your company, who the hell are you?

    $928? Sounds like a scam.

    How many athletes come out the way you say from your course and where are they?

    How are your methods PROVEN in the marketplace.

    Landing pages are WEAK without testimonials to match the story line (copy).

    It's a weak promise in the shape of a shiny object that doesn't hold any PROOF to even come close to justifying that price.

    Are these lessons from Serena Williams herself? With the cost of that price, I as a student better get professional lessons from a sponsored athlete.

    By the looks of it, it was created fairly quickly and thrown out there without any real in depth thought or strategy.

    Whether you sell face to face or use the art of the written word, you better have a damn good strategy and specific target.

    IMHO - trash it and start over... The right way.
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