0 replies
So, hey -- I jus' purchased sum noo shoes maxin' out on a DINKIEST EVAH ticket.

They look cool, they feel sweet, an' ima happy steppin' out in' em.

Kinda chance tho, how I got my purty feets in 'em.

Cos I was meanderin' out in town, slummin' around on stoopid kinda PRINCESS STUFF ... an' then I eyeballed the f*ckers, BLAMMO shop window.

Yeah, so ... my kinda style ... erected aloft on a tastefully scenic plinth ... totally in the absence of BARGAIN! or YOU CHEAP SHIT! or HARLOT WASTAH!

So ima thinkin' ...

WHAT BETTER EXCUSE

FOR A SARTORIALLY EXQUISITE AIRHEAD

TO SKIP DINNAH?

Thing is, we ain't always lucky enough to happen on these kinda max MWAH MWAH MWAH yummostuffs.

Shoes I got rn ... cozza momentary swankycraft twixt MOI & sum random store ... FFS prolly a whole buncha these babies're stackin' out in sum draaahpship webstore sumplace alongside WE ALSO SHIP TO FRICKIN' GREENLAND nipple clamps.

See, cos I look at my sweetie feeties, an' I take in how friends been real positive 'bout my looks cozza their perfect-for-Moi VIBE, an' I would wanna wish for the planet to kiss on my story.

DITZ BEGUILED BY RANDOM STORE!

Yeah, OK -- so what about the internet's globally suffocatin' ANDROIDTASTIC sensory ZEROHOLE romps sweet offa tab an' phone?

From outta whose delish panorama we gotta want for stuff we can't actschwlly touch rn? Or even LICK mebbe coupla secs from rn? Yet still WANT?

That's why stoopid promo asshole HORDES gonna get hot withya 'bout the LEATHER an' the HEELS (we still talkin' my shoes here btw), slottin' their copy into an xxx chars text box designed to LURE U ASS IN on a PROMISE got no actshwl promise about it cos they makin' mincemeat outta l'il ol Moi chillin' out with my legs in the air an' loadin' up way mleh with lame stuff like "perfect for anyone aged 13-90!!!"

So when I said to the guy in the store, "these gonna break my ankles when I fall down in the gutter, slashed?" he was real professional enough to ansa, "price is $950, and to be honest, as long as you can pay, we have no concern at all whether you depart from our store HAPPY ... or whether you subsequently wish to shoot yourself in the tits."

Anyways, such are my heels rn.

I am srsly GLORY MAGNET LEADERBOARD KUDOS GAL & idc.
#copywriting #dinkiness (specific) #dinky #dinkyness (general) #heels #noo #srsly pointy leatherwear #virtual tangibility
Avatar of Unregistered

Trending Topics