Guaranteed Way To Be A Spectacular Copywriter...even if you're ugly...

by max5ty
18 replies
Lots of books on copywriting.

Most (virtually all) are just rehashed stuff from the old-time masters...someone just adds a new twist and gives you booze till you drunkenly send them hoards of money to learn the "latest secrets".

Anyways, as I open another beer...

I want to tell you a guaranteed way to be a spectacular, Maserati driving, Rolex wearing Copywriter.

Yes, even if you're ugly.

Takes a little work, but I have no doubt you can do it.

Plus, and this is a really big plus...it's free to learn.

I know a guy called "Shakey" that was good at this method.

He started out working in a pizza joint in Balkin Montana...after he mastered what I'm about to tell you, he bought the whole pizza chain...

all this even though he couldn't walk...was missing an arm...and his eyes were crossed.

Apparently, although never proven in court, his sister had cut the brake lines on his scooter thinking he'd stolen her wig one night.

He was headed to the store that fateful night and couldn't slow down on a curve...

scooter went off the road and over a 300-foot cliff into the ocean. Before he could swim to shore he was attacked by a shark which ate one of his arms.

Worst case scenario...and this is the worst...

"Shakey" could have given up on life.

Armed with a desire to succeed he pressed on.

Here's what he discovered...

(and since I'm running out of time with this post, I'll cut to the chase)

If you want to be a good copywriter, learn how to tell a good story.

Read everything you can on storytelling.

Stories move people.

People remember stories.

People will buy because of a good story.

The best copywriters in the world are also spectacular storytellers.

So instead of studying how to be a good copywriter by reading another copywriting how to book...read a book that teaches you how to tell a good story.

A good story incorporates most of the elements you need in a good sales letter...

Headline

Opening

Action

Emotion

etc.

then closes leaving the reader feeling how you intend for them to feel.

Anyways, I hope you get the point.

It's worth your time to figure it out.
#copywritereven #guaranteed #spectacular #ugly
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  • Reminds me of the time, back in '79,

    I was, maybe two, three months travelin with a tented show,

    And I'm out 6, 6:15 in the mornin, walkin the midway.

    Ya see it snowed the night before and the ground was covered in it.

    Somethin it never does in Las Cruces that time of year.

    Bein on the security team I'm checkin the ticket wagon

    Orders from the boss was to make sure the door ain't froze shut

    Then all of a sudden, I hears what sounds like screamin

    I turn to my right, facing Picacho Mountain to the west

    And thats when I seen it.

    This 6,500-pound, two tusk brownish grey dominant male pachyderm

    Sprintin towards me, a puny 122-lb, wet behind the ears dumb ass

    It broke its chain on the picket line again and went to panickin

    That's when it hightailed it east towards El Paso with fiery red eyes

    As it comes a barrel down towards me hard and fast

    It suddenly sees me, yelps out a high pitch trunk sound,

    Not quite horn like

    And all of a sudden it recognizes me from before

    So it's tryin to put on the ol' Flinstone foot breaks

    And I yell "AW HELL NOT AGAIN!"

    That African bone crusher, as sure as I'm tellin you

    Comes slidin right up to me and at the very last second...

    Chinchilla

    PS. Don't ja love a good cliff hanger?

    PPS. The story you read was true. There were no names to change because I ain't innocent.
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  • tbh I endeavor always nevah to be ugly.

    Mebbe for hallowe'en I will dress like a bat an' drizzle fake blood on my boobies ... but most times durin' the year I rely on my nachrl charm.

    An' you dead right 'bout storytellin'.

    See, cos from them first pictures in caves to the guy sat round the fire sayin', "back in the day, we used to have pictures in caves, but since those Neanderthals invented erasers, all that sh*t is long gone. But I remember the stories behind those crude images of spearmen hunting boars, and I want to entertain you now with the tale of Bruno the Barbarian and The Night of The Very Large Pig ..." all the way through to theater, cinema & literature, we got narratives establishin' themselves through time.


    Best ads take the story so far an' invite hardcore aficionados back for one final series.
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  • Profile picture of the author gsitesseo
    Imagine my shock

    when I realised what I just stumbled upon?

    It looked like a nomral thread, I needed to browse

    because apparently there is a posting requirements before

    anyone can start their own thread

    I couldn't say no to this opportunity

    You're right, it worked.
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  • Profile picture of the author shivanshu digibask
    Banned
    There are a lot of ways to drive traffic to your site, but Search Engine Optimization (SEO) is one of the most effective. SEO is a collection of strategies and techniques aimed at helping your pages rank higher in search engines results. This increases your site's visibility and can help it really take off.
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  • Profile picture of the author shoptechmedia
    great point.. i am an aspiring copy writer.. one of the biggest struggle i have is keeping the story flow consistent..
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  • I have been reading a lot of HP Lovecraft recently. Should I worry that's I'm scaring readers away with visions of monsters and cosmic nihilism?
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    • Originally Posted by John Jonas Phil VA View Post

      I have been reading a lot of HP Lovecraft recently. Should I worry that's I'm scaring readers away with visions of monsters and cosmic nihilism?

      Depends from outta which end your flagellatin' tentaculature whooshies, I guess.
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  • Profile picture of the author Expont
    The one with the best story will win all the glory. Storytelling is a big, BIG part of copywriting. Because a story can contain an important element. An emotion. Emotion moves people. Thanks for that.

    Can you recommend a good book on storytelling?
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    I'm a content writer on Fiverr, use my services.

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  • Profile picture of the author Medon
    Originally Posted by max5ty View Post

    Lots of books on copywriting.

    Most (virtually all) are just rehashed stuff from the old-time masters...someone just adds a new twist and gives you booze till you drunkenly send them hoards of money to learn the "latest secrets".

    Anyways, as I open another beer...

    I want to tell you a guaranteed way to be a spectacular, Maserati driving, Rolex wearing Copywriter.

    Yes, even if you're ugly.

    Takes a little work, but I have no doubt you can do it.

    Plus, and this is a really big plus...it's free to learn.

    I know a guy called "Shakey" that was good at this method.

    He started out working in a pizza joint in Balkin Montana...after he mastered what I'm about to tell you, he bought the whole pizza chain...

    all this even though he couldn't walk...was missing an arm...and his eyes were crossed.

    Apparently, although never proven in court, his sister had cut the brake lines on his scooter thinking he'd stolen her wig one night.

    He was headed to the store that fateful night and couldn't slow down on a curve...

    scooter went off the road and over a 300-foot cliff into the ocean. Before he could swim to shore he was attacked by a shark which ate one of his arms.

    Worst case scenario...and this is the worst...

    "Shakey" could have given up on life.

    Armed with a desire to succeed he pressed on.

    Here's what he discovered...

    (and since I'm running out of time with this post, I'll cut to the chase)

    If you want to be a good copywriter, learn how to tell a good story.

    Read everything you can on storytelling.

    Stories move people.

    People remember stories.

    People will buy because of a good story.

    The best copywriters in the world are also spectacular storytellers.

    So instead of studying how to be a good copywriter by reading another copywriting how to book...read a book that teaches you how to tell a good story.

    A good story incorporates most of the elements you need in a good sales letter...

    Headline

    Opening

    Action

    Emotion

    etc.

    then closes leaving the reader feeling how you intend for them to feel.

    Anyways, I hope you get the point.

    It's worth your time to figure it out.


    Good thinking. A good story will help you increase sales. But it should be well written to target emotions. A good and exciting introduction will make the reader want to read the entire story. Of course, you must not forget to include a call to action towards the end of the story. *
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  • Profile picture of the author max5ty
    Remembered something today...

    there used to be a sticky at the top of the copywriting forum that a guy took the time to add links about storytelling.

    I went to the waybackmachine.org and pulled it back up.

    https://web.archive.org/web/20150317...marketers.html
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    • Profile picture of the author GordonJ
      Originally Posted by max5ty View Post

      Remembered something today...

      there used to be a sticky at the top of the copywriting forum that a guy took the time to add links about storytelling.

      I went to the waybackmachine.org and pulled it back up.

      https://web.archive.org/web/20150317...marketers.html
      By hidden, I mean one has to do a search, above the skill level of many, however...thanks.

      Stories don't have to be long boring pages of text.

      Jan. 15, 2011. My wife and I were sleeping on a pullout couch in her sister's basement. My two kids shared a tent on the floor with sleeping bags. The sister made sure we were fed.

      It was embarrassing. I was humiliated.

      Jan. 15., 2012. My wife, kids and I rode in my new Mercedes to our new beach house. The kids were excited to get their own rooms. We owned the house, car and were debt free. We even took her sister's family to Disneyland as a thank you.

      What happened? I discovered the Warrior Forum, and all the wisdom it held. But more than discover, I applied what I learned.

      Today, blah, blah blah, and yada, yada, yada.

      Great story from famous Joe Karbo ad told in about 3 paragraphs similar to the above.

      ONE does not have to bore us with their struggles trying to relate. Even in storytelling; tell me quick, tell me true, or my love, to hell with you.

      GordonJ
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  • It's often said how stories are journeys.

    But while this is troo, we are only interested in certain A to B stories.

    Take Star Wars, for example.

    In the version evrywan knows an' loves, galactic heroes trounce the forces of evil while simultaneously sufferin' zero personal confidence ishoos bcs their parents gave 'em real stoopid names like Woop Flip Doop.

    Thing is, at plenty points in this journey there were plenty forks in the road, an' Lucas may not have achieved success in 1977 had the heroes all contracted fountainous dysentry in that weirdo bar thanks to a buncha doobious space burgers.

    For journeys to be meaningful, all depends on the arc of possibility as determined by choices made at forks in roads.

    All the best stories chart sum kinda superlative course between all the available variables.

    Helps here to think of a TREE.

    (An' I know this is troo cos I Yogah grl.)

    So, imagine a massive oak in full leaf -- only one of the leaves is a DIAMOND.

    Tree offers plenty pathways from root to leaf via branches an' twigs ... but the DIAMOND pathway is THE ONE.

    For stories (either/or manifestin' through time to sum purpose) such a pathway represents the best possible, most promising, most entertaining, most exotic (etc) course of the available plot elements through time.

    Result?

    Little Red Riding Hood fixes the wolf, The Avengers flatten Thanos, LOTR works out aftah 9 hours sumhow -- an' all these successful narratives play out same as evry other journey-via-choicepathway narratives we know as classics.

    They got a Narrative Arc de Treeomph results in everlastin' diamond steada momentary leaves gonna wither when Autumn hits.

    Howevah, this kinda storytellin' presooms a passive consoomer who understands the story deal.

    The narrative arc is fixed in advance, an' the consoomer consooms only diamonds.

    Evry movie, evry book, evry TV show, is proffered this way.

    "Here is a diamond of a story. Access via cinema, book, Netflix etc."

    Where marketin' figures is the moment when consoomed diamonds generate expectations.

    Question now is ... what diamonds are these? Are they relevant to Moi?

    So like I go see the Avengers, I consoom the story cos I in the right place to do so, plus it is intrinsically a narrative arc worth consoomin' (bcs Benedict Cumberbatch rocks out as Strange steada fillin' 45 cinema minutes with a real awkward beard shavin' scene while checkin' in on his phone for a YouTube packin' Star Wars dysentry bar outtakes) -- an' I am now free to play this multifaceted diamond against all lights of day, the better to catch the most pleasin' tangential glints gonna light up whatevah nextest pathways inspire my mojo.

    So the story diamond at the end of the tree (bcs it be the one troo narrative path) becomes the start point for a noo kinda tree got growth options bustin' outta its ass.

    That is prolly why any story makes sense to anywan builds offa hard diamonds gathered thus far an' illoominates out into potential glint pathways thereoffa.

    Gotta figure I am speculatin' my tits off here, an' could prolly summarise alla this in an easy-to-access infographic ... but tbh I too busy figurin' way immodest Cumberbatch options.

    "The Eye of Agamotto sees all! By what means did you breach my Sanctum's defenses?"

    "You srsly hot. Plus I a real desprit puppy."


    Nowan don't gotta agree with nuthin' evah I say, but rn I could use a real dreamilicious MWAH MWAH MWAH from the Batchster -- if only to satisfy my love of transformational metaphor.
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  • Post of the day! man this motivated me to be a story teller for my own self because i like talking to myself now every time i feel stressed i would tell a story to the freak in me, lolz, thanx for motivating me
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  • Profile picture of the author sparrow
    I get the story part of this post it's awesome and I have always kept this in mind

    My biggest challenge is putting a story that is compelling to the people I am trying to reach

    I'm working with what I consider a disrupt-or in my niche, what appealed to me is not working for my story because it obviously is not working the people I am trying to reach are not reacting, I'm just a bad story teller because I think I'm too close to the source of what people are looking for.

    In fact it took some time bouncing ideas across people to even define what I was selling.

    Eventually I hope the feedback will eventually tell me what intrigues people for what I am promoting.

    I agree this should be Post Of The Day as suggested by rezzel
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    • Profile picture of the author max5ty
      Originally Posted by sparrow View Post

      I get the story part of this post it's awesome and I have always kept this in mind

      My biggest challenge is putting a story that is compelling to the people I am trying to reach

      I'm working with what I consider a disrupt-or in my niche, what appealed to me is not working for my story because it obviously is not working the people I am trying to reach are not reacting, I'm just a bad story teller because I think I'm too close to the source of what people are looking for.

      In fact it took some time bouncing ideas across people to even define what I was selling.

      Eventually I hope the feedback will eventually tell me what intrigues people for what I am promoting.

      I agree this should be Post Of The Day as suggested by rezzel
      Are you talking about a story for the product you offer in your link?

      A testimonial can also be used as a story...and can be some of the best stories.

      "I was really sucking at ranking my site, then I found this and blah blah blah"

      I would suggest you look into using testimonials as stories.

      Sounds like a good product that I'm sure more would want to know about.
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  • Profile picture of the author Alex Cohen
    A story serves as a container. Fill the container with persuasion elements that touch the reader's buying emotions.

    Alex
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