Critique My Copy | What am I missing?

My opinion - it's overdone, a bit too fast/pushy and some facts are not quite right.

Cats scratch to remove the dead layer of cells that appear on their claws - to mark their territory, etc.

The moment I read your explanation of 'it feels good to him' I knew you didn't understand the behavior and what causes it. You lost me right there.

What your copy says in the end is 'buy this, use it and your cat will stop scratching'. But that's not true and anyone who has a cat that has not had it's toes amputated...knows that.

There is so much to work with - the kindness aspect of NOT declawing cats appeals to animal lovers.... link that in with use of the product....cats can be trained to use an acceptable scratch post or old chair with the help of the product you are selling.

Make your copy a story about cats and the owners who love them...and you'll sell products.

You don't want to use the ad to crusade.


A lighter touch would be to find a way to make cat owners feel good about themselves for choosing not to declaw. It's a fine line but a big difference that can create a positive interest in the product.

One method that might help is to outline your ad by have a list or outline of points to cover. Expand on those by writing about them....you will end up with much more text than you need but you have text you can use buried in those sentences and paragraphs.

I can write content easily starting with a blank page. Copywriting is much harder - I have to 'attack' it from a different angle or the blank page...is intimidating.

I don't know what your google ad says to drive people to your sales page? So I can't address the prospect qualifying part of your ad.

But from a strictly sales point of view, your opening ...

could work if you're trying to sell to people who are "Problem Aware" .

- They have a problem.

- They are looking for a solution.

- Now they want to know if you have the solution, and why they should buy yours over someone elses.


But then you immediately switch directions and continue your copy with

Well no, I don't.

I don't need you telling me I have to understand why cats scratch.

I own 2 cats. I know they scratch. (They also shed, eat my plants, and hack up furballs) but the only thing I need in the first few sentences is you introducing a solution to my problem.

Once you have my interest, then you can tell me a story about why I should buy yours.


If I was completely unaware of why cats scratch, because I just got my first cat ever, then I might want to know why they do what they do.

But then I probably wouldn't be coming to your sales page for that. I'd be visiting some cat lovers blog or forum, or asking my veterinarian.


So first think about who you're targeting with your ads. This will help you decide which type of opening lede might work best.

And once you figure that out you should flow from the opening into the copy. Instead of breaking the flow by changing directions without warning.

Without seeing the landing page you're running people to...

it can be hard to give a full assessment.

Do you have social proof?

Do you have a big name behind you that recommends this or invented this? Etc.

Do you show the product in action?

Testimonials?

Is this new?

What is your guarantee?

What is your offer?

I did a couple of quick checks and see this is a highly competitive area.

I would hope your product is either new or your offer is overwhelmingly great.

But having said all that...and with all the other great comments you've received...I'll just comment on the copy that you've submitted:

Your copy has what I refer to as a lot of speed bumps.

Your headline is not something that would compel me to drop everything and read further.

You say: "Here's How You Can Instantly Train Your Cat To Stop Scratching Your Furniture"...later in the copy you say: "Training" your cat not to do it will never work!" Ok, that just confused everyone...

You start out by saying: "If you own a cat..." Yes, most people reading this do own a cat or they wouldn't continue reading. You've repeated yourself and are slowing down the reader..

Then you say: "you need to know about this simple solution that can easily and quickly fix your problem."

That sentence is wreckless.

Better to say something like: Here's a quick solution.

Then you say: "It's simple. You need to remove the reward.

How can you do that?

Well, you can't..."

That is a mind stopper that confuses and frustrates readers. Your reader is now confused and is probably starting to click away if they haven't already.

You go on to say the 50% sale is ending soon...after all the other confusing stuff, this isn't a big worry.

You end by saying: "If you don't order yours right now. Not only you're going to have to wait for our new batch to be produced but also you're going to end up paying more."

From what I read, you haven't even started to put the customer in a thought process that this product is even that good...that important...that helpful...that they would even care.

So, I would suggest your copy needs a lot of work.

At least you're trying and that's how we all learn.

Just a couple quick thoughts.

tbh I lost your cat at HE.

gal cats can scratch out also -- so don't dump 'em outta yr markit.

When your cat scratches your very existence into oblivion, likely you gotta SIT UP.

Eithah you play along, or evrythin' you value is TOAST.

tbh if furnityoore mattahs, buy a DOG.

Diffrent kinda vibe, I guess.

"Yeah, so these guys raided my home at 3am and KnackHund took 'em out good. Now all I gotta do is fix the BLOOD on the SOFA."

We should wish to fix up always, an' deploy the 'pproriate slooshins with aplomb.

But evah we try to sell cats to dog people

when the dog people won't nevah love cats.

Hund vice versa.

Hi,

A little too push and "to the point."

Maybe a couple more features and benefits.

Maybe a little more about the product.

I like the scarcity you used, thats cool. FOMO is a great tactic if it is legit.

Try to pace the pain of your audience, then show them (not tell them) that your product is the solution (pleasure) to their pain.

Try to see their problems from their perspective and describe what it is like.

Use scarcity, social proof and what not.

Social Proof example:

"Many people have found (common and desirable benefit) after (buying/using this product)"

When pacing pain points, try to make it seem as if you know for sure what they are thinking. Ideally know as much about your target audience as possible. Know their pain, their hopes, what they want, their objections and everything in between.

or any variation.