Jesse, you need a cool name for your method.

Mass Control = cool name

Butterfly marketing = cool name

IMmethod is about as vanilla as it gets.

A bit like in your other letter you had up... where you had eight different methods, IMHO what you need is an overarching idea/name/hook that ties them all together. Then this quick cash product can be pushed as a module of the bigger method. A bit like how Frank Kern pushes his 24hr cash machine (I think it's 24?) as a subset kernel of Mass Control.


-- Ross

Man, that sounds painful. Need some antacid?

After what happened with the sales page that might not be wise.

The headline says that you offer a way to make $200 each day in just a few minutes. But the benefit is hidden behind some verbal clutter. "If you're not... this is for you." Negative and positive in the same sentence could be confusing. How am I supposed to know how long it takes you to make coffee? Not really interested in buying something that will make me curse my own stupidity. So that whole above the fold stuff could stand a rewrite.

It took me a while to figure out that the picture is you buried on a beach. At first I thought it was a light gray background with a same tone light gray shirt. Not an immediately obvious picture.

You refer to an hour a day of work, which seems like a really slow way to make coffee, then you jump back to the time it takes to pour a cup of coffee. Pouring the same cup of coffee for an hour would be a Las Vegas quality magic trick! So I think the timing reference needs a rewrite as well.

I don't see any guarantee.

I'd take the affiliates link off the main sales page.

I agree with Ross that a catchy name would help sell your system. If you wasted time on bogus systems, then you figured out this approach, it might also help to tell some of your experience. Right now, all I can tell is that some guy says he has a system that's NOT these popular things. Beyond that, I really have no idea what I might get if I buy this.

You might be onto something here but it could really use a significant rewrite.

Chris

My main problem with the sale page was the Arrows pointing towards Add to Cart.

I myself don't like the whole 'add to cart' picture. It's just the fact that its soooo huge and kinda blurts out click me, way too much. If I was to land on a page like that i'd end up just leaving.

Also the ebook looks cool, but I think a picture of you (seeing that your young) at the top would be much more noticeable, somewhat like how michael brown did with Niche Blitzkrieg.

It's a program I signed up for basically because the sales page was superb.

However I do like the sales page overall, are you actually making 200$+ a day btw?

Thanks for everyone's input.

Sounds like I have some serious work to put
into this thing. I'm going to be spending some
time with it tomorrow... and I'll definitely be
referring back to this thread a time or two in
the process.

Thanks again for all your input, guys. I really,
really appreciate it!

Hey Jesse,

You got some good stuff. I'd suggest adding a sales hook to your letter, so you hit the emotional triggers in a more powerful way.

- Sam