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Sales page going viral on FB/SU, but not converting well. Tips?

by irishpolyglot
5 replies
Hey all!
I have a sales page that cleverly starts with a video that is immediately worth sharing (me, one guy, speaking 8 languages confidently and fluently) and it has gotten 11k thumbs up on Stumbleupon, almost 700 Facebook shares and hundreds of tweets too.

So the sales page itself is somewhat going viral, and people are actively linking to it all over the place! The video (and perhaps to a certain extent, the encouraging copy) makes the sales page actual fun content. This is something I don't want to change obviously.

And yet, I'm just making one or two conversions a day. A pathetic conversion rate considering the traffic. The price is pretty high for most people, so I don't expect a ridiculously high return, especially when the traffic is from typical non-buyers like stumbleupon users. But I *know* I can at least double this if I changed something I am not seeing.

I would love your tips on how I should change this page, but I do NOT want to use aggressive and cheesy techniques. The goal will be to keep the page mellow and shareable, while changing the wording or adding/removing information that will ultimately multiply the number of conversions.

Any tips appreciated!!

Here it is: The Language Hacking Guide
#converting #fb or su #page #sales #tips #viral
  • Profile picture of the author J. Barry Mandel
    Hi Ben,


    A few things I caught:
    1. The format of the page itself is not conducive to sales, your not getting it across in a professional manner. I would look at other language teaching program websites like Pimsleur, Rosetta Stone etc.
    2. Since this is a "serious" language product (as compared to so many other niches like "how to make a potato gun") YOU need to come across as a pro - a suit is way more professional and people will take your more seriously as opposed to wearing street garb. I did not watch your video but its probably best not to appear in a pose like a "rapper" :p
    3. I would change your first name to Benjamin
    4. Your digital product presentation can come across better then the way it is, I'd actually get rid of the iPad and maybe switch it for a Nook or Kindle

    Best of Luck,

    Justin
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  • Profile picture of the author virginiad
    Hi,

    I want to start out by saying I am new at this, and invite any more experienced copywriter to tell me if I am off-base with anything I am saying.

    A couple of suggestions (along with the need for targeted traffic)

    1. It is hard to read. You should have black print on a white background (or black print on a light gray background, if you insist). The type should be larger.

    2. What is "The social/confidence context of a language ignored in academic courses"? That subhead will fly over the head of an average person who might want to buy a language course.

    3. You have a link to your blog in your header. A sales page should give the prospect only one choice: Buy the product. You are sending your prospects away with that link.

    4. Your purchase link should be more obvious. Put in graphics for credit cards, etc, and make the button orange.

    5. You need a header at the top of the page that grabs the reader and compels him to read the letter.

    6. You need to connect better with the reader. Show him that you understand the pain that he feels in not being able to speak more languages. What hardships does this cause? What opportunities may he miss? You have to emphasize the problems that he has right now, and then go on to show how much better his life will be when he can speak several languages.

    7. Your bullets are weak. The easiest way to write effective bullets is to list a feature of your product, then follow it with 2 or 3 powerful benefits.

    For example...your first bullet is: How to practise a language every day for free with natives even if you can’t travel to their country. (p. 164)

    You might say something like:

    How to practice a language with native speakers. You will learn correct language patterns faster and easier; your family will be amazed at your abilities!

    That still needs work, but will give you a basic idea of what I am saying. The fact that the book tells how to practice with natives is a feature. You need to ask yourself "so what?" and develop some benefits. How will the prospect benefit by being able to practice with natives?

    These are just a few suggestions.

    Hope this helps.

    Virginia
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    Virginia Drew


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    • Profile picture of the author sethczerepak
      You're making a common marketing error...positioning yourself as a friend. People don't buy from friends, they buy from experts. The video is clearly you in your living room or home office. Too friendly and folksy. It needs to be redone with better audio (a lapel mike) and with at least a nice green screened in (if that's the right term) background.

      Also, you need a compelling headline that drills down to the END RESULT benefit...a reason for them to stick around and watch the video, read the copy and to eventually buy. Most of all, you really should just invest in a copywriter. You're getting plenty of traffic and (provided that it's targeted well), you would make the money spent on a copywriter back within a few week or days even.
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      • Profile picture of the author irishpolyglot
        Thanks for the interesting comments everyone! They all make a lot of sense.

        @Justin I'm not competing against Pimsleur. They are language specific and business oriented. I am aiming for people interested in living their passion to speak a language and this is why I am dressed as I am. The course would not suit business people at all so I don't want to mislead them with such a costume.

        Good point on the name though. My name is actually Brendan (not Benjamin). That could come across as more professional.

        I don't think you looked at the image so carefully - there IS a Kindle there beside the iPad!

        @Virginiad
        Thanks so much for that list!!
        I phrased it as I did because this is NOT a Language Course. It's a guide as to how to speak any language. There are social and confidence tips rather than grammar and vocabulary, since these are actually way more important when it comes to true immersion. Could I express that better?

        And good points on relating to someone frustrated with language learning. I'll have to think about how to phrase that.

        @Seth Yes, I'll redo the video soon when I can add an Asian language to give it a bit more credibility, although people have told me that they like the current video because of the spontaneity of it. If it was too professionally done I feel that would distance me from people who think that what I'm doing is out of reach for them?

        I think someone in a "living room" is more impressive speaking 8 languages than someone on a podium or whatever, since it seems closer to their reality.

        And yes, two points from replies on a compelling headline. The name of the guide isn't enough - excellent point! Will have to add that in to infer result asap!

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        Thanks everyone - other thoughts appreciated
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