29 {{ upvoteCount | shortNum }}
29 {{ upvoteCount | shortNum }}

Critique Good Copy

by donhx
24 replies
"Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness...."

Rather than critiquing the efforts of newbies, how about some of the pro writers here pick a well-written page, done by another expert, and share what they think are the strengths and weaknesses of something that is already converting. That would be helpful and positive.
#copy #critique #good
  • Profile picture of the author indexphp
    That headline says nothing and doesnt offer anything for the reader to stop and read
    Signature
    www.TrafficPlusConversion.com
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066092].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Ross James
      Originally Posted by indexphp View Post

      That headline says nothing and doesnt offer anything for the reader to stop and read
      Apparently it's working for polarity responders.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066127].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Ross James
    People have, I don't think it's a good idea, unless you get the "OK" to do so from the writer.

    There was a product once, I can't seem to find it anymore but it was basically a critique on all of Halberts Ads. Wish I got my hands on it before it was yanked.

    If you want something like this, there are plenty of copywriters that do live critiques. I know Mike Fortin has a couple products like this that are worth checking out if they are still available.

    Merry Christmas,

    Ross
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066106].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Ross Bowring
      The report in my sig does what you are calling for.

      Ross
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066136].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author donhx
        Originally Posted by Ross Bowring View Post

        The report in my sig does what you are calling for.

        Ross
        Just took a quick look, but saw that it was something valuable and worth investing time in. Thank you. I have downloaded it and will be studying it.

        I'm glad you saw my point. Anyone can give six reasons why people should %$#@ off, I suppose, but I really respect a person who takes the time, as you have, to make a serious contribution to helping others do a better job of copywriting.
        Signature
        Quality content to beat the competition. Personalized Author Services
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066200].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Daniel Scott
        Sure does.

        It's also absurdly brilliant... much like Ross himself.

        (And Ross... consider that your Xmas present. Because I don't like saying nice things about ANYONE )

        -Daniel

        Originally Posted by Ross Bowring View Post

        The report in my sig does what you are calling for.

        Ross
        Signature

        Always looking for badass direct-response copywriters. PM me if we don't know each other and you're looking for work.

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066538].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
          Originally Posted by Daniel Scott View Post

          Because I don't like saying nice things about ANYONE )

          -Daniel
          Now come on Dan, you said some mushy things about Brian...remember?

          Merry Christmas from across the ditch.
          Ewen
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066611].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author Ross Bowring
          Originally Posted by Daniel Scott View Post

          (And Ross... consider that your Xmas present. Because I don't like saying nice things about ANYONE )
          -Daniel
          Dan, I was kinda hoping for something I could open. Handkerchiefs... socks... oven mittens.

          --- Ross
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3072587].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author indexphp
      Originally Posted by Ross James View Post

      People have, I don't think it's a good idea, unless you get the "OK" to do so from the writer.

      There was a product once, I can't seem to find it anymore but it was basically a critique on all of Halberts Ads. Wish I got my hands on it before it was yanked.

      If you want something like this, there are plenty of copywriters that do live critiques. I know Mike Fortin has a couple products like this that are worth checking out if they are still available.

      Merry Christmas,

      Ross
      Hmmm, well if it's working in the market, then sweet! But to me, that headline is trying to be too artsy and fails at its job
      Signature
      www.TrafficPlusConversion.com
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3083734].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author DannyDarwin
    Ross Bowring is the man and his report is the definition of an offer no one can resist.

    Funny, I've had his report on my mind for several days and wham - it manifests itself on the very forum where I first found it.

    Thank you Ross, you add real value.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066274].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Ross James
      Originally Posted by DannyDarwin View Post

      Ross Bowring is the man and his report is the definition of an offer no one can resist.

      Funny, I've had his report on my mind for several days and wham - it manifests itself on the very forum where I first found it.

      Thank you Ross, you add real value.
      What I'd like to know is how you got it without a war room account. I tried, to no avail.

      Ross "the other one"
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066289].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Ross Bowring
      Originally Posted by DannyDarwin View Post

      Ross Bowring is the man and his report is the definition of an offer no one can resist.

      Funny, I've had his report on my mind for several days and wham - it manifests itself on the very forum where I first found it.

      Thank you Ross, you add real value.
      Danny, thanks for the kind words. Glad you dug/dig the report.

      --- Ross
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3072597].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Scott
    Ewen,

    I told you... the things I said about Brian's love-making prowess was to stay strictly between us.

    -Daniel

    P.S. Just got back from NZ... only saw the south island though. Loved it. Considering purchasing real estate in CC in the future...

    P.P.S. Bah humbug.

    P.P.P.S. Happy holidays to you too
    Signature

    Always looking for badass direct-response copywriters. PM me if we don't know each other and you're looking for work.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066620].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      Dan,

      Remind me please, was it Viagra or some herbal extract that
      did the trick?

      Lasts longer than the Energizer rabbit too wasn't it?

      Ewen
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066634].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      Originally Posted by Daniel Scott View Post


      P.S. Just got back from NZ... only saw the south island though. Loved it. Considering purchasing real estate in CC in the future...
      Dan,

      It's interesting how Aussies love coming over here
      to visit and we Kiwis love going over there.

      Seems like a weird quirk of human nature, somwhere else has
      got to be better than where we are.

      Ewen
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066722].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Scott
    No pills... no tricks...

    ...just good ol' fashioned lovin'.

    -Daniel
    Signature

    Always looking for badass direct-response copywriters. PM me if we don't know each other and you're looking for work.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3066655].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Alex Cohen
    Originally Posted by donhx View Post

    "Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness...."

    Rather than critiquing the efforts of newbies, how about some of the pro writers here pick a well-written page, done by another expert, and share what they think are the strengths and weaknesses of something that is already converting. That would be helpful and positive.
    Don,

    Kevin Rogers dissects a sales letter he wrote that held the #1 spot on Clickbank for weeks. You can view it here:

    The Warrior Forum - The Copy Behind A ClickBank #1 Product...

    Alex
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3074167].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author aandersen
      Originally Posted by Ross Bowring View Post

      Originally Posted by DannyDarwin View Post

      Ross Bowring is the man and his report is the definition of an offer no one can resist.

      Funny, I've had his report on my mind for several days and wham - it manifests itself on the very forum where I first found it.

      Thank you Ross, you add real value.
      Danny, thanks for the kind words. Glad you dug/dig the report.

      --- Ross

      I have to agree with Danny...

      Ross, you ARE the man. That report was awesome. Of course Vin's and Matt's were great too, but your's was something special. I really enjoyed reading it, and learned a lot.

      So... thanks!
      Signature

      signature goes here

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3074640].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Ross Bowring
      Originally Posted by Alex Cohen View Post

      Don,

      Kevin Rogers dissects a sales letter he wrote that held the #1 spot on Clickbank for weeks. You can view it here:

      The Warrior Forum - The Copy Behind A ClickBank #1 Product...

      Alex
      Kevin's great report inspired mine. After a lot of self study Kevin's report woke me up to the fact that mentoring with North Carolina's favorite Italian American was the way to go.

      Ross
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3074733].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Kevin Rogers
        Hey Guys...

        Great thread. True, we can never get enough positive and useful feedback.

        Here's a video critique Ben and I did while gathering material for our Conversion King's launch early next year. This is just sample material, but I think it might be the kind of critique you had in mind.

        Untitled Document

        Let me say I don't know who wrote the copy for this product, but we chose it because it happen to be sitting at #1 CB for IM that day. There's a great lesson in how the video does a great job of accomplishing what the letter doesn't (which still baffles me).

        Anyway, hope you find it useful.

        Best,
        Kevin

        P.S. Ross is a championship-level copywriter and his report is a must read.
        Signature

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3078990].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author virginiad
          Ray Edwards does a fairly detailed critique here:

          Created with Camtasia Studio 5

          He disects a letter and shows what he looks for. I think it is a great lesson. It is almost an hour long.


          Virginia
          Signature

          Virginia Drew


          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3080093].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author Irish Intuition
            How did this turn into a Montello family backslapping?

            You rock dude... no, you are the best bro... no I really
            mean it, your the shizzit...

            We get it
            Signature




            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3081199].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author JanPat
    A swipe file of winning copy is always a necessary for any good copywriter. Not sure if those can be posted, as there's likely copyright implications.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[3096805].message }}

Trending Topics