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Sales Page Review? Much Appreciated

by GeronimoBee
16 replies
Hey guys.

I won't drivel on too much.

And just cut to the chase--BodyFat Guide

Any Suggestions would be much appreciated.

Cheers

GB
#appreciated #page #review #sales
  • Profile picture of the author KingOfContentMarketing
    My eyes. The burning...
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    Marketing is not a battle of products. It is a battle of perceptions.
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    • Profile picture of the author iThinkhard
      Originally Posted by Joe Ditzel View Post

      My eyes. The burning...
      I had that effect too, I can't look it or read a single word.. I closed the page as soon as I opened it.
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  • Profile picture of the author travlinguy
    Originally Posted by GeronimoBee View Post

    Hey guys.

    I won't drivel on too much.

    And just cut to the chase--BodyFat Guide

    Any Suggestions would be much appreciated.

    Cheers

    GB
    This site looks like something out of 1996 designed to tell fortunes or horoscopes. There's way too much going on for any visitor to know what's going on. I'd suggest you hire a copywriter and Web designer.
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    • Profile picture of the author agc
      Originally Posted by travlinguy View Post

      This site looks like something out of 1996 designed to tell fortunes or horoscopes.
      This pretty much nails my first reaction as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author HypeText
    First thing is get rid of that gawdy background! Sales is all about Psychology...that background isnt doing you any favors...

    It's apparent that you don't have web design or even a graphic design background so going into using positive and negative space and layout that leads a readers eyes isnt going to make much sense to you.

    In a situation like this you might consider purchasing a template or maybe bartering or even paying an experienced person to create your page. I am sure there are a bunch of Warriors on here that could help you out.
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  • Profile picture of the author Haris Tahic
    Well, I closed the sales page in less than a second (I think so). (no hard feelings)
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    Great investment opportunity! Click HERE! <-- Permanent traffic!
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  • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
    Banned
    Horror Show - qualifies for a listing in "Worlds Worst Websites".
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  • Profile picture of the author Serena Atnip
    Is this some kind of a joke?

    If I were you, the first thing I'll do is to hire a good designer.

    the second thing is to remove the link to the amazon product page where the top three comments are:
    - Body Composition calculator very inaccurate. (1/5)
    - Don't waste your money! (1/5)
    - Useless (1/5)
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  • Profile picture of the author Serena Atnip
    As far as the book being a waste of money, I have a no-risk offer to refund customer's money if they can present a quicker, easier, safer, less expensive method to measure and permanently trim body fat
    Now I am sure it is a joke
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  • Profile picture of the author maximus242
    its the return of 1998!
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    xResponsive Advertising Agency | Direct Marketing | Online Advertising | Create Breakthrough Campaigns for Your Business http://xresponsive.com

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  • Profile picture of the author mihovi
    I'll call it Un-sales page or "How to make everybody to avoid you for good..."
    Waaaay too retro.
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  • Profile picture of the author stephen de vries
    Sparkles are very annoying - colours are too psychedelic - photoshopping on the ladies are terrible...
    Think about separating your testimonials better (box them or something)...
    The overall look is going to make people close the tab before they've read the first sentence.
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    • Profile picture of the author GeronimoBee
      Hahaha...I love it it makes me nostalgic...

      It was posted on another Forum.

      I thought you guys might get a laugh out of it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Will Edwards
    Flippin 'eck!

    Will
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  • Profile picture of the author GuerrillaIM
    Hahaha nice one, had me going there for a sec
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