The Middle Finger Sales Page....

Lost me 20% of the way down.

Positioned to try and look wickedly cool but fails in it's objective.

20% in and I still can't see a benefit Mark. Asking myself, language aside, what the hell is she pitching to me?

Because I'm not getting it. And there, right there she lost me.

And I suspect - many others will feel the same way.

Maybe she should write the guide... how to alienate most of your target audience instantly.

I'm sure it would be a best seller.

Note dry humour.

Positioning? Considering the massive number of approaches she could choose from to bring this product to market she chose the crass route.

Will it work? Yeah probably. For some.

The rest?

No way. A big price to pay in lost sales just to try and look cool.

All this is is ego rubbing. "Hey! look at me, I dare to be different!"

Really? Well, you could have fooled me. I don't think so.

Original? Nahhh. Far from it.


Mark Andrews

The presell emails:

2012-04-12_0127 - MarkHess's library

personally, I dig it...

This copy does fall in line with a lot of her blog posts....

Thought something like this would be interesting and worth discussing...

Who ever wrote this, has not taken into account
the prospect's State of Awareness.

The prospect has probably been pitched half a dozen
times about creating an info product over the years.
This is old news to them. They've heard it before.
So there is no need to read the page.

Cheers

Mark

I'm with Mark and Steve; it just seemed like she was forcing the humour (dunno if she was or not; not read any of her other stuff) and that turned me off from whatever she was trying to sell.

In fact, that was what dominated my attention, not her actual offer.


I can see what she was trying to do, but it didn't work for me. Then again, perhaps I'm not her target audience.


Ben.

mark you're a better man than me... i was just on the page fora whole 10 seconds and bailed.

sorry... IMO, the design on that site is pure garbage... what does that chick at the top (the HUGE photo) have to do with the site?

Just awful. I couldn't force myself to read it.

lucky you. lol. you didn't miss anything Ken...

I think she's outsmarting all of us.

Too many people on this forum cling to old-hat ideas and then when they see anything that's different, they freak out and say it sucks.

-->Attention to design
-->Unmistakeably 'edgy' attitude
-->Strong belief system

Sounds like a woman...a woman who knows how to gain the trust of other women. You guys forget that women make 85% of all consumer purchases and they don't like the things YOU GUYS make/write (91% of women feel advertisers don't understand them).

She's not perfect, but at least we know she's doing something right because the warrior forum people are "totally turned off".

I read it...Most of it.
Everything else aside, there were things I just couldn't get over.
Little things, like inconsistency in the way numbers are written ($60 grand - 60 grand). The tone of the sub-heads. Some we're long (too long) some were short. Grammar was off to the point where it ruined the experience for me. Even in the first bold part of body copy... It starts with just a long run on sentence which is clearly multiple ideas.

It seems scattered and overall ineffective.

She isn't writing copy - she's building a culture, attacking the white-hot, passionate center of her target market.

That's marketing brilliance. If you know anything about "specializing", then you'd realize that whatever marketing efforts she is using in there is golden. She's qualifying her readers.

But yeah, it's more catered towards her fans.

-WittyBlogger

I thought the copy was okay...nothing to write home about. Probably, okay to start. Many things to test...that's for sure.

The photos of her clenching her teeth are annoying...I would test these those photos against other photos.

Remember though...she may have success as a copywriter but that doesn't mean that this particular site is successful...we don't know.

Am I the only one it doesn't display properly for? In Firefox and IE, the whole right side of the body copy is cutoff.

angry sells

funny sells

she's both!

and she's got her own voice (priceless)

ps. she used to work for aweber, so i gather she picked up one or two pointers on email marketing in her time there...

The eye path is pretty muddled.. by the time I got to the copy I wasn't really even interested in reading it. :-/

Skimmed a bit but...

I think it'd be more effective if it was given the attention it deserved, rather than fighting all those menus and that giant graphic that serve no purpose on a sales page.

Cheers,
-Adrian

I've never really understood the apologists for bad copy and/or design. All I can really chalk it up to is sucking up.

I've seen it when guys like Dan Kennedy and John Carlton posted horrendous sales pages. The argument was, "they're so awesome it doesn't matter." And perhaps it doesn't.

Personally, I tender nor accept any excuses for laziness. This site sucks. Will it sell to the pre-sold fans, if they in fact, exist? Probably. It ain't going to sell to anyone else though.

Jeezus people, think for yourself and take a look at what the emperor is really wearing.

Hey guys...I'm new!

As far as the copy - I agree with some of you who say that it comes across as forced. I can tell she wants use the vulgarity to come off as unique but it doesn't really come off natural.

I am turned off from most sales pages though. Unless it's going to give me a piece of information I want and need then I click off of it quickly. I also always include some valuable information in my sales copy for that reason - towards the top.