So, this time I want to try a more personal letter instead. So, this is what I've come up with. It's a letter based on some of Joe Polish's samples. I took a bunch of pieces from 2 or 3 samples and stitched them all together. Don't know if this is a good letter or not, so I need your critique since I'm no copywriter. I plan on hiring a flyer distribution company that will charge me $400 to distribute 5000 letters to local high income homes, and I'm kind of hoping for more than 1 client this time since letters are supposed to convert higher than postcards.
Please let me know what you think. I really want this campaign to go well since $400 is kind of a lot for me if it doesn't produce anything. Thanks! Also, I know the letter looks plain but I might add some boxes/outlines and maybe a logo after the text part is ready.
Let me know. Thanks!
here is my original bad marketing piece. Please continue to give advice.
edit: after some feedback I've decided to revise my entire letter. Will post back later.