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Your thoughts on my Sales Letter please

by PCH
6 replies
Hey guys,

I've just set up my first ever Sales Page. I've done it in Optimize Press, so I know it's not as flash as some of the nice html ones I've seen.

It anyone can tell if there's anything good, bad or indifferent about it, I'd appreciate the feedback.

It's not live yet, so the Add To Cart button in inoperative at this stage.

The Page can be found at ...

Email Profit Explosion | Email Marketing Secrets - Exposed

All tips and pointers much appreciated

Thanks guys
#letter #sales #thoughts
  • Profile picture of the author AshwaniGaur
    This is definitely a first draft. Good attempt at copywriting.
    The offer is not clear. What am I buying!
    I did not feel the urge to buy....Here something for perspective.
    Mind it, I used info from your sales page, plus its rough...

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  • Profile picture of the author markpocock
    I see you're in Australia. My Aussie mate Alexi Neocleous is
    running a copywriting event on 1st-2nd Dec at The Westin in
    Sydney.

    I suggest you book yourself on Alexi's event.

    warmly

    Mark
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    • Profile picture of the author PCH
      Hi Ashwani,

      thanks so much for taking th time to look at my page. I note your comments and will give thought to what you'e said.

      @Mark - thanks for that mate - I'll check it out!

      All the best guys
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      • Profile picture of the author tjonesga
        I like the page content!

        I think the back ground color is to dark, and take your eye w
        away from the content. That is the only thing that i would change until you split test it.

        Now go make another one, while you are in the mood, and split test them.

        Lots of luck!
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        • Profile picture of the author PCH
          Thanks for the thumbs up Tom - that's very encouraging for me.

          I'll take your suggestion and re-think the background color. I set it to that just because I recall someone yonks a go saying that dark (reflex blue I think it's called) blue is a real winning color.

          So not knowing any better, I just set that as the background. But I can change it easily enough. Also as you suggest, I''ll dream up analternative to split test. Thanks for your help Tom.

          All the best
          Paul


          Originally Posted by tjonesga View Post

          I like the page content!

          I think the back ground color is to dark, and take your eye w
          away from the content. That is the only thing that i would change until you split test it.

          Now go make another one, while you are in the mood, and split test them.

          Lots of luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author Ray Wilson
    To be honest, I think the IM market is too much bored these days. Everyone, except the complete newbie, has seen hyped up sales letters a gazillion times.

    What you really want to keep to a minimum are the cliches.

    Headline - too common.
    Sub-heads: "The Gurus ...Keep Us In The Dark!" - this trick has lost it's power.
    "Finally Starting To Make ... Real Money Online" - you gotta be more creative. Frankly, I'm bored.

    Also, you're making it difficult for people to read the page. Too much yellow highlighter. I don't like those wide sales letters too. Makes me wanna hit the back button.

    Those modern sales letter designs often look crappy and distract your eyes away from the words. That's not good.

    Ray
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