Please Critique Stock Investment Kindle Book Sales Page

by 13 replies
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http://howtomakemoneyinstocks.biz/bookdescription.html
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Update on 2013-6-14

#copywriting #book #critique #kindle #page #sales
  • You wanted honesty..so here it goes...

    None of your headings or sub-headlines grab my attention or make me want to keep reading. I think you start out the "bonus" headlines much stronger than the primary product. I think your bonus copy is much better. My 2 cents.
    • [1] reply

    • Hi Mark,

      Thanks for your honesty. I have been waiting for someone to help me. You are the first one and straight to the point. "Grabbing attention" is the key I learn from you and I will work on it. Thank you.
  • I'm not going to even critique the copy. There's nothing here worth saving.

    But that's not the problem.

    Because I just don't believe a word of what you're saying.

    I don't get any sense of authority, authenticity, credibility or believability.

    If I'm wrong...

    If you've created a totally unique algorithm or set of techniques...

    If you're offering a real solution...

    I apologize.

    However...

    The core of any campaign is a high-quality product.

    I don't sense your ebook fits that description.

    Again...

    If I'm wrong, set me straight.

    Mark
    • [1] reply
    • Hi Mark,

      Thank you very much to point out the problems. I do have a high quality product with real solution to the investors. But I fail to show the authority, authenticity, credibility or believability in the book description/sales page.

      I need to rewrite the whole thing to make it work. Otherwise, no many people will buy the book. Thank you for your feedback. That really makes me thinking.
  • Is this a sales page or just content you will paste into amazon? If its a sale pageI suggest designing a ecover just to attract people. So that people know what your product is. Currently my first impression is I wont be interested enough in your title to continue read the body.
    • [2] replies
    • Hi there,

      It's way too technical for the average individual stock investor. You are using a lot of jargon that might be well-known to experts in the industry, but not to average investors.

      You would get a lot more buyers if you A)explained your terms or B)rewrote it without jargon or did a mixture of both A and B.

      Marcia Yudkin
      • [2] replies
    • Hi,

      The Amazon book description page serves as a sales page. The ecover design is under construction. Thanks for the advice.
  • You need to hire a copywriter. You are not skilled in the use of words and if you work on this letter for a year and it gets 10X better it will still not be a sales letter that converts well.

    Be honest about whether you book will appeal to a tough audience of investors and if you are truly confident it will hire someone to write copy for you. And if it won't cut your losses.
    • [1] reply
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