Well, what I see is a huge jump in transition. You proceed from agitating a problem (Doesn’t the Last Hour of the Day Always Feel Like the Longest?) immediately to presenting your offer.

If it's a blog, it might be cold traffic. Presenting your offer immediately doesn't help the sale unless people already know your product.

IMHO you're missing one HUGE chunk at the top of the whole sales copy. You definitely can get better conversions by hiring a copywriter.

I noticed that you placed all your benefits in a separate page only accessible by a tab above. The problem is, you're not funneling traffic to click on and read the benefits. But yeah... you shouldn't even do something like that. Shove the benefits immediately in front of them.

People want to know what's in for them... They don't want to waste time. People decide if something's worth their attention within seconds. They don't like to be sold to. They want to buy something they desire.

You could start by finding a sales angle/hook for the whole copy. Unfortunately, this copy is pretty bad, so I really hope you can invest in a copywriter instead of stumbling in the dark by yourself. It'll save you a headache.

James Fame

People don't want to manage their time.

They want a weekly wednesday golf game they never have to cancel.

They want to leave work feeling great and return feeling excited.

They want their boss to acknowledge their superior performance and give them Larry's job.

Start where they REALLY are, not where your system is.

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