Please critique my health sales page.

My first impression is that I can get this same information from Google. In fact, I did and have had six pack abs for two years. I didn't buy a book, I just followed the advice from a few articles on bodybuilding.com.

Of course, not everyone knows this or can get the same results, but there's a reason I never bought one of these products. The information is already out there for free. To get people to pay you for this, you need a positioning strategy.

What's the one reason you can tell the reader "You will NOT find this information anywhere on the internet because (reason here)?"

This is the MOST important question to answer, especially since (I'm assuming), you're not planning on hiring a professional to create your landing page.

Check out Kyle Leon's customized fat loss or Muscle Maximizer program. His unique positioning is the customization based on the person's body type. That's an oversimplification of course, but if you watch his videos you'll see the way he positions it as something you can't find ANYWHERE else.

That's what you need in this hypercompetitive niche.

The good news is, you're going to use Youtube which can be a KILLER way to get traffic in this niche.

Heck, over time... your youtube channel alone could do most of your selling for you... since you're entering a very VISUAL niche.

So, if you're willing to put in a lot of time and effort on your informational/instructional videos on Youtube... you won't need the world's best or most polished web page to sell.

Again, you'll be able to do a lot of preselling with your Youtube channel.

BUT... with that said, your current page won't really do much for you.

Even a guy like Mike Chang, who gets millions upon millions of Youtube
views... at one point had a 20 page written sales letter a few years ago.

Here's what he has now...

How To Get A Six Pack Abs - Six Pack Shortcuts

so, as you can see.... there's a lot of good copy and graphics on that page.

so, you definitely don't have enough persuasive copy on your page right now.

Back when I owned my fitness business... I sold an abs program that was
fairly successful. It did six figures, but only because I was one of the
few in that niche online.

These days, it's a whole new ballgame because of how competitive it is...
you're going against competition who have multi-million dollars businesses...
so they can crush most competitors just by traffic and affiliates alone.

I'm all for competition... but maybe you approach this project on the
fringes... and work some of the keywords in this market that get
a lot of searches, but there isn't a ton of competition.

This as a few years ago, when I was doing some keyword research... but
the subniche of "belly fat loss" was hugely popular in terms of searches, but
little competition.

that may have changed a bit today, but you may find success in a subniche
of the abs market as well.

But study mike geary, mike chang, and like Seth said, Kyle Leon and even
Tom Venuto and you'll see what it takes to really make it in this niche.

Couple quick things I noticed:

Most would probably wonder how long all this takes. 30 days, 60, 90? I don't think just saying a person can go from that to this without any time frame is very convincing.

Your program uses dumbbells...you might want to mention that quicker.

Also your before and after pics don't have any time frame. Who knows if a year or two separates the two pics?

I remember when Mike Mentzer came out with his HIT program way back when. There was a lot of controversy surrounding it. Maybe you could give some more scientific evidence as to why your HIT system works.

One thing (more) I can say about your before/after picture is that
ii is REALISTIC. You look "normal" and not like a muscle-man.
I think that this makes your message authentic--like from a 'real'
person. Most before/after pics from the product creator have the after
looking like Mr. Universe, which make people think, "There's no
way I can get that ripped!" (At least that's my interpretation.)

I know in selling you want to make your goals reachable for
the prospect otherwise you lose credibility.

-Ray Edwards

I'm not by any means a copywriting expert, and I see a lots of good examples in here but I think people are missing the REAL problem here. You were ripped off, the opt-in rate of your squeeze page has nothing to do with the copy you wrote. Your target market are women with belly fat, it is Obvious that the clicks sent to your squeeze page weren't women with fat bellies. The Solo ad vendor must have seen your squeeze page they knew what kind of clicks you wanted.

UPDATE!

I changed the video.

Thank you very much for all your help it has helped me a lot and I really appreciate it.

What do you guys think of my final product?

SITE UPDATE!

Please critique my site.

The traffic comes from Youtube.

Smarter heads can correct me, but is it legal to scratch out a higher price and show a discounted price ($47 is scratched with $17 as the price) if you've never sold products at the higher price? My understanding is that this is a new product just being releases. Just sayin'.