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Looking for feedback on autism site

by tkhowse
10 replies
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#autism #ecommerce #feedback #honest #site
  • Profile picture of the author Raydal
    You are dealing with a very emotional issue and yet there
    is no "humanness" to the home page. You need a STORY,
    readers need to know that you understand their pain, frustrations.
    You need a lot of EMPATHY. You don't want to simply appear
    as a storefront.

    Do you have personal experience with the illness? Then let
    the visitors know. Give them a reason why they can trust
    you and how you are DIFFERENT from other sites. An
    introductory video would be very effective here.

    -Ray Edwards
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    The most powerful and concentrated copywriting training online today bar none! Autoresponder Writing Email SECRETS
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  • Profile picture of the author Loren Woirhaye
    What Ray said.

    Those supplement claims are insulting.

    Get yourself to some autism conferences.
    Signature
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  • Profile picture of the author AnabelleFlorida
    I know you're trying to do a good thing, that's awesome and I wish you the best of luck, but the site does need help.

    I would suggest incorporating charity support (autism), because right now, the supplements front page looks like you're just interested in maximizing profits; a little philanthropy would go a long way. You'll get a competitive advantage if you combine your business with a cause.

    For instance ... You could donate part of the proceeds to further research or an autism charity of your choice. It doesn't take much but it's very effective.

    I know you feel you're already giving by having created this website and offering support and products that work, but think about it.

    The story on your About Us, should partially be included right on the front page as suggested by Ray.

    The copy on your DONATE page needs lots of work. I would scrap it, because it feels awkwardly self serving.

    If nothing else, here's a rewrite of your front page headline ...


    Help Is Here! Proven, Safe, All-Natural Remedies That Really Work!
    --> Without Harmful Side Effects <--
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    • Profile picture of the author NNNNNN
      I agree with Ray. You need to connect with your visitors and nothing does that better than a personal story. The only reason I looked at this is that I have a family member with autism. But, I have to tell you the theme, including the colors, layout and photos do not grab my attention when I first logged on.
      The area behind where your logo is should be a close up photo of a young child with his family. People want to connect in that way. I know early on my family felt like we were the only ones who were faced with raising an autistic child. Your site has to show that you are there for them every step of the way. If you concentrate on that, you'll wind up making money.
      You have a lot of information on that first page. you should also consider breaking that up into separate pages (use photos to take up space) which will give your visitors an opportunity to explore the site and get more comfortable. The longer they stay, the more likely it will be that they purchase something.
      A last word about the colors. One thing I've discovered is that color is critical in helping convey your site's message. Look at other medically related sites and look at the colors they chose. I would bet that blue is not prominent. I would think that you'll find more green, grey, sienna, tans and browns. Think like you just invited someone into your living room. What color is that?
      Good luck. You sure have a great cause.
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  • Profile picture of the author staceythewriter
    (1) It appears to be a for-profit site (e.g., ".com"), but you are asking for donations. As a copywriter who works with nonprofits, I associate donor acquisition with ".org" or ".edu."

    (2) Your recipe page is a tad misleading for two reasons: 1. Seeing the Recipe tab, I thought the recipes and/or links would be there on that page and would be free. 2. You headline the offer as a cookbook, but then refer to it as a special report; they have two totally different meanings.

    Lastly, your donation page says "contribute to the work we are doing." You have to be very specific about the work to which you are referring. There is no evidence of any work that you’re doing. Donors want to know how you plan to spend their money. Ambiguity will not do; specificity helps build trust. Trust can be established in a variety of ways: give specific details whenever you possibly can; give concrete examples of past success; make it easy for a website visitor to get in touch with someone if they’re interested in lending support; lean on your past supporters to appeal to new website visitors and include endorsements from experts, etc.  
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    Stacey Mathis
    Stacey Mathis Copywriting
    The Copywriter's Highway to Success
    http://www.staceythewriter.com
    Twitter: @staceythewriter

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  • Profile picture of the author AnabelleFlorida
    Hi Stacey! Awesome observations!
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  • Profile picture of the author KitchenTableWarrior
    Wow, this is interesting, and the feedback so far is great! I see that you are an autism parent and can appreciate what you are doing on the site.

    As an person who worked for many years at an autism school, I don't claim to be an expert in all things autism (who is?) but I can tell you a few things that might help.

    I would explain more in detail about why you are making the suggestions to purchase the supplements on the site. Put your spin on it. Has your child used these supplements? Have you seen any benefit to them? What behavioral changes did you see? Are they charted? It's not enough for someone to say "these are supplements that actually work". This message can misunderstood and cause people to be turned off. I know that you are not suggesting these supplements "cure" autism, but more specific copy as to why you are suggesting these would be good.

    Same for the recipes. Tell us more WHY the gluten free recipes are beneficial to autism. IF you are looking to sell a cookbook of gluten free recipes the you may want to consider a teaser pack of recipes that are a free download when signing up, or a few teaser recipes on the actual recipes page.

    I would scrap the donation section for now. It cheapens your site, just my opinion.

    Lastly, I would change your sign up from "Free guide to surviving autism", to something more of a call to action. Something along the lines of... "The Thriving Autistic Family: Great Day to Day Tips for Strength and Understanding".
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    • Profile picture of the author AnabelleFlorida
      This is pure Gold ...

      Originally Posted by KitchenTableWarrior View Post

      "The Thriving Autistic Family: Great Day to Day Tips for Strength and Understanding".
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  • Profile picture of the author tkhowse
    Thank you very much for all your help. You all have definitely given my Mom & I a lot of valuable insights.

    We are in the process of incorporating many of your suggestions into our website to make it better.
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    • Profile picture of the author James Fame
      Where's the empathy?

      The first thing I looked for in the page I opened was empathy, which is an understanding and reflection of what your website visitor is experiencing, and I found none of it.

      I saw a baby with an autistic look... That was good. It's an attention grabber for these parents. And then it stopped right there.

      When I looked at your squeeze page copy, I saw dead points. Granted, if the problem was urgent enough, you'll inspire clicks based on the benefits presented, but the copy needs to be more empathetic.

      It would make sense that you're targeting the parents of autistic children. What you need to do is to reflect the frustrations and problems that they're facing...

      Basically, go to where they are (Imagine them buried in thought, tossing in bed, worries crowding away their foreheads with wrinkles...).

      Echo out what they're thinking inside...
      What solutions they've thought of...
      What dreams they'd like to achieve...
      What they hope to bring out in their child...

      Nothing.

      I see a dry advertisement, devoid of any emotion. As a parent, you look at this, and see... Is my child really "diseased" and he needs a supplement for a cure? Repulse.

      If you really need to, do research. Interview these parents personally. Find out their inner thoughts and feelings.

      Like Ray said, you might need a story. Is there a success story you can highlight? Is there a personal experience you can bring out in the headline?

      You need a hook. You need to sound more personal, instead of that detached, corporate headline.

      James Fame
      Signature

      Fire me a pm if you have a question. I build businesses and provide consulting. I do not do finance/money/internet marketing niches. Fitness, self-improvement and various others are welcome.

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