Which Sales Video Do You Like Better?

by MaksP
21 replies
Hello warriors once again.

First the advice I get here is AMAZING and i take everything into deep consideration and testing.

Here is my current page with a new video: The Vertical Jump Truth - Dunk In 12 Weeks!

This is my old video that I just replaced

Which video would you guys use based on your experiences and why?

Which video do you like better?

Any criticism is very welcome.

Thank you very much in advance
#sales #video
  • Profile picture of the author Chriswrighto
    They aren't too different, in terms of which one I'd want to buy from.

    The thing is the start of both videos could be much improved. You begin by educating, and although it is is a great snippet to use... the start isn't the right place.

    You need to get them pumped up at the beginning...

    Are your prospects frustrated about using other programs that just don't improve their v. jump?

    Are they searching for that number 1 method to help them dunk?

    Whatever it is, get them pumped up!

    And then use the stat to grab their attention and then use that statistic and combination as a great lead in to the rest.
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    • Profile picture of the author rishwoj
      Hi

      The second video as it kept my attention better, don't really know why, just liked it better! The best part on both was where you showed smaller people performing the jumps.
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    • Profile picture of the author MaksP
      Originally Posted by Chriswrighto View Post

      They aren't too different, in terms of which one I'd want to buy from.

      The thing is the start of both videos could be much improved. You begin by educating, and although it is is a great snippet to use... the start isn't the right place.

      You need to get them pumped up at the beginning...

      Are your prospects frustrated about using other programs that just don't improve their v. jump?

      Are they searching for that number 1 method to help them dunk?

      Whatever it is, get them pumped up!

      And then use the stat to grab their attention and then use that statistic and combination as a great lead in to the rest.
      So should I use maybe 3 things that are holding someone back from jumping high to start the video then lead into what I have now?

      What about just using a video with motivational music and only showing guys dunking without saying a word?
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      • Profile picture of the author Chriswrighto
        Originally Posted by MaksP View Post

        So should I use maybe 3 things that are holding someone back from jumping high to start the video then lead into what I have now?
        Why did you want to learn how to dunk?

        What did you feel before you learned how?

        You are your customer. Use everything you know about how it felt when you couldn't dunk.

        What about just using a video with motivational music and only showing guys dunking without saying a word?
        No, this is just entertainment.

        Now it would be another thing if you had a bunch of guys who had learned how to dunk from your system.

        Then you could immediately gain credibility and social proof.
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  • Profile picture of the author sarah23
    2nd video is probably good one.
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  • Profile picture of the author jjosephs
    Your presence is good. You seem like an athletic dude who believes in his product. Chris is right that you need to latch onto the emotions. But verbal flow is also critical, and your script is full of speedbumps. Big deal in sales videos.

    Besides doing almost nothing for your message, the intro about "the average running jump of a professional football player..." is long, wordy and confusing. Like a highschool textbook, not a sales video. By the time you tie them together into a coherent point, my attention is gone.

    Even when you present data, you need to learn to present it in a way that is punchy and engaging. You're dealing with athletes, not eggheads.

    "The reason for that is because of.." another overlong speedbump in your script. "That's cause they train differently"

    Couple more:

    - DETAILS! "High increase in your vertical jump fast". Really? HOW high? HOW fast? At least give a ballpark. You wouldn't say "I can make you lots of money soon" and expect it to convince anyone.

    - Instead of minimum results, say "They didn't work". Also "numerous amount of trial and error" is bad english.

    - You wait until the end to make the point you should be making at the beginning.
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    • Profile picture of the author MaksP
      Originally Posted by jjosephs View Post

      Your presence is good. You seem like an athletic dude who believes in his product. Chris is right that you need to latch onto the emotions. But verbal flow is also critical, and your script is full of speedbumps. Big deal in sales videos.

      Besides doing almost nothing for your message, the intro about "the average running jump of a professional football player..." is long, wordy and confusing. Like a highschool textbook, not a sales video. By the time you tie them together into a coherent point, my attention is gone.

      Even when you present data, you need to learn to present it in a way that is punchy and engaging. You're dealing with athletes, not eggheads.

      "The reason for that is because of.." another overlong speedbump in your script. "That's cause they train differently"

      Couple more:

      - DETAILS! "High increase in your vertical jump fast". Really? HOW high? HOW fast? At least give a ballpark. You wouldn't say "I can make you lots of money soon" and expect it to convince anyone.

      - Instead of minimum results, say "They didn't work". Also "numerous amount of trial and error" is bad english.

      - You wait until the end to make the point you should be making at the beginning.
      Wow. Thank you very much for your resposne. You made me open up my eyes as to what I need to change.

      Would you think it would be better to change the intro to:

      Did you know?

      A pro football player jumps higher form a standing position than a pro basketball player.

      On the other hand, a pro basketball player jumps higher with a run up compared to a pro football player.

      and then change the following:

      "High increase in your vertical jump fast" to "an increase of up to 12 inches in your vertical jump"

      "numerous amount of trial and error" to "numerous trial and error"

      Thank you very much for your reply
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      • Profile picture of the author jjosephs
        Originally Posted by MaksP View Post

        A pro football player jumps higher form a standing position than a pro basketball player.

        On the other hand, a pro basketball player jumps higher with a run up compared to a pro football player.
        Who cares? You're answering a question nobody asked you. If you're going to talk about football, you need to describe WHY first. Do not bore, especially at the beginning of the vid.

        Example of a setup:

        "You want a big anti-gravity slam dunk like the world class athletes, but can't even get the ball over the rim? I'll tell you what's wrong... Your training. There are 2 different kinds of jump training (Describe both schools) For the first time, you get both schools locked into a single hardcore method that catapults your jump into the big leagues in as little as X time."

        But let me repeat, you should be putting 2:20 at 0:00. It's your headline for chrissakes. This comes before explanations and stats.

        "High increase in your vertical jump fast" to "an increase of up to 12 inches in your vertical jump"
        Better, but limp. Talk to athletes!

        "Up to 12 more inches of high jumping, slam dunking power"

        "numerous amount of trial and error" to "numerous trial and error"
        Just say "Extensive research and testing", Problem solved.
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        • Profile picture of the author MaksP
          Originally Posted by jjosephs View Post

          Who cares? You're answering a question nobody asked you. If you're going to talk about football, you need to describe WHY first. Do not bore, especially at the beginning of the vid.

          Example of a setup:

          "You want a big anti-gravity slam dunk like the world class athletes, but can't even get the ball over the rim? I'll tell you what's wrong... Your training. There are 2 different kinds of jump training (Describe both schools) For the first time, you get both schools locked into a single hardcore method that catapults your jump into the big leagues in as little as X time."

          But let me repeat, you should be putting 2:20 at 0:00. It's your headline for chrissakes. This comes before explanations and stats.

          Better, but limp. Talk to athletes!

          "Up to 12 more inches of high jumping, slam dunking power"

          Just say "Extensive research and testing", Problem solved.
          Ok thanks I edited the numerous amount to numerous trial and error for now.

          I will redo the video again on Monday and be more specific.
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        • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
          Originally Posted by jjosephs View Post

          Who cares? You're answering a question nobody asked you. If you're going to talk about football, you need to describe WHY first. Do not bore, especially at the beginning of the vid.

          Example of a setup:

          "You want a big anti-gravity slam dunk like the world class athletes, but can't even get the ball over the rim? I'll tell you what's wrong... Your training. There are 2 different kinds of jump training (Describe both schools) For the first time, you get both schools locked into a single hardcore method that catapults your jump into the big leagues in as little as X time."

          But let me repeat, you should be putting 2:20 at 0:00. It's your headline for chrissakes. This comes before explanations and stats.

          Better, but limp. Talk to athletes!

          "Up to 12 more inches of high jumping, slam dunking power"

          Just say "Extensive research and testing", Problem solved.
          Good advice.

          Your video(s) are a demonstration of poor positioning.

          I watched your video on plyometrics. I think that's actually better than this stuff.

          But neither the stuff you're saying in the face-to-cam bit or the "how to" videos are there yet.

          And you're not convincing me you have some really unique to sell.

          I mean...

          All you're really saying is you combined two forms of training. Big deal. Let me quickly Google how Basketball and Football athletes train. I can put the pieces together myself really, really, easily.

          So...

          Yes...

          You need to add more specificity.

          But you also need to generate a ton more curiosity.

          'Cause right now...

          I don't think your program sounds like anything special at all.

          I could go to Bodyrock.tv or follow some of the YouTube gurus who gives this stuff away for free... and get to where you're expressing just as fast.

          So convince me your program is REALLY special.

          You've failed on that level.

          You're still just another commodity.

          My take.

          mark
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          • Profile picture of the author MaksP
            Originally Posted by Mark Pescetti View Post

            Good advice.

            Your video(s) are a demonstration of poor positioning.

            I watched your video on plyometrics. I think that's actually better than this stuff.

            But neither the stuff you're saying in the face-to-cam bit or the "how to" videos are there yet.

            And you're not convincing me you have some really unique to sell.

            I mean...

            All you're really saying is you combined two forms of training. Big deal. Let me quickly Google how Basketball and Football athletes train. I can put the pieces together myself really, really, easily.

            So...

            Yes...

            You need to add more specificity.

            But you also need to generate a ton more curiosity.

            'Cause right now...

            I don't think your program sounds like anything special at all.

            I could go to Bodyrock.tv or follow some of the YouTube gurus who gives this stuff away for free... and get to where you're expressing just as fast.

            So convince me your program is REALLY special.

            You've failed on that level.

            You're still just another commodity.

            My take.

            mark
            Thank you for your advice. I really appreciate it.

            I am thinking of starting off the video on my sales page by getting the viewer pumped up and asking them if they want to jump high.

            Than show my progress from nothing to dunking in 8 weeks.
            And explain that I did this by using the the special training methods of pro athletes.

            After that I will tell them a story how I was not born with natural ability and overcame that. Plus how jumping higher made me a better basketball player.

            After my story I will show other peoples progress that used my system.

            Also what would you advise for me to change in my plyometric videos?

            Once again, thank you.
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  • Profile picture of the author RickDuris
    Thanks!

    Notice how it held your attention?

    They didn't show him actually dunking until the last few seconds. Although many times it looks like they're going to show you.

    The other thing they got you to do was remember what it was like when you tried to dunk a basketball when you were a kid. They tapped into that emotion.

    Who ever storyboarded that knew what they were doing.

    - Rick Duris
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
      Originally Posted by RickDuris View Post

      Thanks!

      Notice how it held your attention?

      They didn't show him actually dunking until the last few seconds. Although many times it looks like their going to show you.
      The messages and emotion that Brandon touches upon are so honed in. But they're also universal.

      I couldn't care less about dunking. And yet... after watching his video, I went out today, bought a basketball and started trying. (And boy do I have a LONG way to go.) He's talking about dunking. No doubt. But he's also talking about overcoming the odds and proving that nobody can tell you what's possible.

      That's what grabbed my attention and kept it until the very end.

      Brandon's authenticity is off the hook too. That's a MAJOR reason the piece has so much micro AND macro appeal.

      Originally Posted by RickDuris View Post

      Who ever storyboarded that knew what they were doing.

      - Rick Duris
      Yup. Big time.

      P.S. The agitation is brilliant. They show his quote, "Your biggest hurdle isn't your opponent. It's yourself." Then they show the hoop for 8 seconds... then the empty bleachers... then his voiceover begins with, "I failed so many times, it makes my stomach hurt."

      Again, you nailed it with the storyboard observation... but this use of imagery can really backfire. It's a creative license that can almost be masturbatory. It wasn't here. I was like, "I know I'm about to watch something amazing."
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      • Profile picture of the author MaksP
        Thank you for the amazing reposnses I really appreciated guys.

        What if i redo my video in the same format but use myself being an undersized post player with bad jumping genetics.

        Will that video alone increase conversions in your opinion?
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        • Profile picture of the author BrianMcLeod
          Originally Posted by MaksP View Post

          What if i redo my video in the same format but use myself being an undersized post player with bad jumping genetics.

          Will that video alone increase conversions in your opinion?
          Maks,

          Take a look at Rick's example video again and watch all the end credits.

          There's a whole lot more going on than a format. There's brilliant videography, editing, titling, color grading, audio... AND the talent really delivers on camera.

          And as stunningly well done as the example video is - it's not a sales video. It's a beautifully made short film... better suited to securing an optin than tacking some clumsy sales pitch onto.

          If that's what you mean by "the same format"... I'll go out on a limb and say, "Yes, it will increase conversions".

          Here's an internet marketing oriented video for Alex Jeffreys I really liked and bookmarked that's similarly poignant and beautifully produced (by Joey Xoto):


          Keep working...
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        • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
          Originally Posted by MaksP View Post

          Thank you for the amazing reposnses I really appreciated guys.

          What if i redo my video in the same format but use myself being an undersized post player with bad jumping genetics.

          Will that video alone increase conversions in your opinion?
          Pulling something together like Brandon's video takes talent and money.

          Or at least extremely talented friends.

          If you created a video that captured the story and emotion in Brandon's piece, I can't imagine a reality where your conversions wouldn't catapult into the stratosphere.

          As Brian said...

          Something like Brandon's video might be used earlier in your funnel. But it's a commercial-style format worth aspiring for.

          Athletes are suckers for Rocky-type stories (i.e. underdog sports stories.) When they're done well, magic.

          I can't NOT cry when I watch The Cinderella Man.

          Take it to the next level brother.

          mark
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  • i would go with a direct promise to kick off.

    support that promise with the usual
    even if your...
    even if your...

    At the moment it's like you're starting with the sales argument.
    that belongs later on in the process
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  • Profile picture of the author shakamon
    The 2 videos were very similar that i wasnt really sure what changed other then the NBA clip. I agree with some of the earlier comments about getting more to the emotions. I definitely think this is the kind of product that does better with more testimonials.
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  • Profile picture of the author RickDuris
    It's not JUST about dunking, it's about being 5'5" and dunking. He makes it sound like he broke the 4 minute mile. And you can too!
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