I suggest putting it on a website and re-posting. I would take a look if you do. As a rule, many people don't download DOCS or PDFS from people they don't know. Just saying...

I downloaded it, took a quick peak, then trashed it immediately.

I'm not sure why. All I remember is -

Dear parent,
You may be saying “I’m not up for this.”

And the second I read that I thought "he's right, I'm definitely not up for this". I think you're trying to address rebuttals so fast you're actually creating them. Have some confidence in your copy. When that's the first thing I have to read, I immediately sense insecurity and can't read any further.

But if you started with something like -

Dear parent,
This is the awesomest shit you will ever read in your life.

I might have read further.

Its not bad overall. But the head is weak. Why not use the copy you have further down and cut to the chase.

So instead of ""