It looks fine to me, but I would add a video of yourself talking about your services.

You should also show some proof and examples of work you have done in the past.

..........

You've depersonalized your company to the extent that it's indistinguishable from any made-up boilerplate company a designer talks about while creating demo pages for a new WP theme.

Who are you? Who is your ideal client? What do they dream about that only YOU can provide and in what unique ways can you provide it to them they can't get anywhere else?

It looks good to me.
Maybe to add... Explain why they should purchase the service from you?
And also to add in testimonials..

Yeahh, good copywriting....ain't necessary here....

Of course it is! I mean, you did post on the copywriting forum, right? Or was that a mistake? ha

Copywriting does not always equal big red headline with long copy promoting an info product. It's important everyyywhere, in every scenario, with whatever you're selling, period.

It's easier than ever to "look professional" today. If you buy a nice template & don't completely botch it up, you're in good shape. Your fate is determined by how you stand out amongst everyone else doing the same thing & that differentiation primarily takes place in your language.

Your design is good enough. Focus on the questions BrianMcleod mentions & don't just include it in your video - put it in your headline, body copy etc.

Why is this even here? This what we want? Turn this nook into "How does my website look?"

But to answer his question... it looks naff. With dead boring writing. He's doing Fiverr gigs.

Don't forget that warriorforum ranks high in search engines. So when potential clients inevitably google your company name to see if you're legit, they might find you the expert getting your ideas battered here. They might then hesitate to pay thousands monthly to a company that barely knows what it's doing.

Newbies might want to use a "tiny URL" that relays to their site, which they can de-link once the critique is done. Doesn't prevent people from mentioning your company by name in the thread, but it can help with online reputation management...

Thanks to those who helped