Review my sales site please!

29 replies

I am new here and really to the IM world.

I am followings an IM system that I am working very hard to help me make some we all are.

I am getting ready to launch a product on maximizing your sites traffic.

It would be much appreciated if you would review my site for me and give me some advice on what is good or bad.

Please keep in mind that my graphics are not yet up because I am still waiting for the designer to get done.

I will also be adding the details on the Part II book.

The site is

Thanks alot!
#review #sales #site
  • Profile picture of the author datfire
    Hi Brooke,

    Don't know if you saw my feedback on your site in the thread I started but if not you can find it there.

    Also I wanted to say thanks for your suggestion on changing the type font on my site. I did so and it looks so much better. Much more readable now, though I still need to spend some time on breaking up the long patches of copy and look into incorporating some graphics. Good luck with your new site.

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    • Profile picture of the author pcalvert
      Your post is off-topic. It does not belong in this forum.


      "If a cat sits on a hot stove, that cat won't sit on a hot stove again.
      That cat won't sit on a cold stove either." - Mark Twain

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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
    Hi Phil,

    I am sorry I thought this was a review forum. What topic should it go in?

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    • Profile picture of the author pcalvert
      Hi Brooke,

      You should have posted it in the main forum. But don't post it again because a moderator may move it there within a day or so.


      "If a cat sits on a hot stove, that cat won't sit on a hot stove again.
      That cat won't sit on a cold stove either." - Mark Twain

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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
    Thanks for reviewing my site Dave, your suggestions made sense and I have them changed.

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    • Profile picture of the author datfire
      Hi Brooke,

      Just took a look at your site. One more thing I might suggest is that you reword your guarantee.

      To those who give our product an honest try can receive...(first of all your the spelling on receive is incorrect...e before i is the correct spelling).

      Drop the first word (To) to make it sound better.

      But the way it reads now they can't receive their money back if they are not satisfied until 60 days after they purchase. Would be better to give an unconditional guarantee...if they are not satisfied with the product their money will be promptly refunded. It also helps to state what is really obvious anyway with a downloadable product...that "they can keep the book with your compliments...just your way of saying thank you."

      Just a suggestion. Good luck.

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  • Profile picture of the author Jordan Wee
    Hi Brooke,

    Saw the wording overlapping just above "How to Drive Traffic to Your Site". I am using Firefox 3.0.7.
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  • Profile picture of the author Danny Turner
    Hi mate
    I'm in firefox and the site is all messed up
    text overlapping & no images
    For credibility If you could show stats for a website you have used this on......
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    • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
      Hi Danny and Jordan thanks for letting me know.

      I will check out the overlapping and try to figure out what the problem might be.

      Also, there are no images because I am still working on them to be completed and will hopefully have them up ASAP.

      I would also love to offer the product to anyone who can review it and give me a testimonial.

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  • Profile picture of the author Felix Makmur
    Hi Brooke, I just want to add my two cents here. Maybe you can increase the fonts of your titles and headlines, just to make it looks more "attention-grabbing". And adding a banner with nice graphics in the header part will make the site looks more appealing as well.

    Btw, I think the traffic light signs that you are using to highlights the main points of your product are a bit big and taking too much spaces. Maybe making them a bit smaller will make the website looks much nicer and well ordered. That's just my personal opinion btw.

    By the way, I'm just curious, are you using pen name in your website? Because I saw the name "Roger Whitetaker" in the bottom, instead of Brooke :-)

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  • Profile picture of the author chrisclements521
    nice site. Have you already launched or are you about to?
    Chris Clements, Founder & CEO, YeeZ Mobile Inc.

    The Most Profitable White Label / Private Label SMS Reseller Program available to Offline Marketers! Long Codes & Short Code Keywords, in one account! YeeZ Mobile's
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  • Profile picture of the author gb4biz
    BrookS, I just took a look at your site and i agree with ZenMagic about a nice banner or picture and the signs are too big ( maybe get rid of the pole section and decrease the sign size by 33% or so. Also, the word a after If you're fed up paying a too much needs to be deleted. Your sub headline So Was I could be larger and Bold Red and I didn't see a disclaimer. The idea sounds great, but if your going to all this trouble and expense, make a few more tweaks. It will pay off in conversions once your live. Hope this helps. "Good Luck".
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  • Profile picture of the author uconcept
    Definitely, it needs a banner. If the first 'screen' does not appear appealing, people will leave without even reading a word. When I say 'screen', I mean the top portion of the page people see without having to scroll. This area in particular needs to be enticing. And that top blue title could be divided in to two lines, making them bold and bigger and depending on design, red. Hope this helps. Just my opinion.
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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
    Hi all,

    Thanks so much for your tips and advice.

    They all make sense and I will begin incorporating them.

    I agree about the graphics, I am still waiting for them to be completed my graphic designer.

    I will have some different bullet points as well.

    The product is not yet launched yet but should be on the 23rd of March.

    Thanks again everyone!
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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
    Hi all!

    Ok I have taken a lot of your suggestions and have hopefully applied them all!

    If anyone wants to take a look and let me know any new thoughts that would be awesome!

    Thanks again for all the help!
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  • Profile picture of the author uconcept
    Oh yeah, the site looks much better now!
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  • Profile picture of the author gb4biz
    Really nice graphics and the new traffic graphics are much nicer ( cleaner and take up less space ) Hope you have Great Success!
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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
    Thanks to everyone for all their help. Best wishes to all!
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  • Profile picture of the author Husanto
    Hi Brookes,

    I think your site is to many overlapping word and images. you must to check it and
    the layout is also very perplexed. You must to put contact detail and privacy policy..

    Work From Home On Your Computer No Experience needed !!
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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS

    Which browser are you using. There is no overlapping on my version of firefox and ie.

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  • Profile picture of the author MaverickWil
    Hmm.. I'm no expert at copy writing but the "So How Much Should I Charge Part" seems to be overselling it. Personally I think the statement of "I should probably charge around $1500-2000" is not very congruent with the rest of the site.

    Maybe it's because of the lack in detailed product description to back up the price tag claim. There's a veeery long detailed part to justify your pricing but most of the actual product description is in short bullet points that doesn't really convey to me how your product is different from other products. It just doesn't seem to click somehow.

    I wish I could tell you how to go about it but I'm still not very proficient in this myself just yet. I'm still at the stage where I emulate the format of other successful product sales page. Maybe someone who is good at this can contribute?

    All the same though, the website looks good overall and is a great starting point. All the best.
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  • Profile picture of the author BrookeS
    Thanks for all the advice! I have made more changes to the site that everyone has suggested. If you would like to go and take a look please feel free too.

    Thanks again!
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  • Profile picture of the author Hackbridge
    I'm not sure how long you've been in IM but if anything I'd say that "Action speaks louder than words" and to get the site up and running is great.

    Here's something I don't like gmtreview

    I'm just trying to find your site on Google, so I'm wondering what search term you used to get on page one?

    Since I'm describing the approach AND providing you with the instructions which makes this book capable of providing thousands of dollars from massive amounts of traffic, I should probably charge around $1500-$2000.

    Is that really a realistic price to charge for an ebook? Even if it's true? Why not take up consulting and charge that much?

    I'm not knocking what you've done, I said "it's great" but given what you said about getting on page one, I'm not sure about how you did that and I think people might say that the site still needs some work. I wouldn't say it's the finished article, or it is and it doesn't have to look any more professional?

    Overall, well done on making this start. I hope it goes very well for you.

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  • Profile picture of the author richmannow
    very nice work for a new Im marketer. Very impressed
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  • Profile picture of the author Gary Pettit
    Yes, I would also like to suggest a different font and correct the overlapping
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  • Profile picture of the author Paul Walker
    Nice work. You just need to change the font color abit and adjust your spacing.

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  • Profile picture of the author jayrock15
    Probably a better footer..
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