Give FIRST. Receive SECOND.

by Zak L.
27 replies
I don't normally do posts like this - but I just had a little feeling in me to write something up.

So here I am.

A few months ago I finished reading a book by Stephen Covey - called the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

And one of the habits inside the book was 'Seek first to understand, then to be understood'.

And I believe this concept is so, so, so POWERFUL in business.

You always want to seek to understand your prospects problems first, how you can be of service to them, how you can GIVE value to them FIRST.

Then the money (or whatever it is that you need) - will come second. It is the bi-product of giving.

This is the law of reciprocity.

But what a lot of people are doing these days - is they're in it for a 'quick fix' - to make as much money as possible, in as little time as possible WITHOUT giving any real value to the marketplace.

I used to be like this. I was so excited about this whole 'internet thing' that I jumped straight on to eBay and started selling anything I could to make money.

It's great - but if you want to be in this long term - you HAVE TO provide value in everything that you do.

Your products, your customer service, your business relationships, everything.

Because at the end of the day, we're all human - we all have goals, aspirations, dreams and ideals for ourselves that we work for every single day.

Put yourself in your prospects shoes, put yourself in your business partners minds - how would you like to be treated if you were them?

Treat them like a friend, assume familiarity, and talk to them as if you've known them for years.

And you'll build rapport instantly with them.

Be genuine. Be you.

Give FIRST. Receive SECOND.
#give #receive
  • Profile picture of the author Gijsbertus
    Nice read and I totaly agree.
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by Gijsbertus View Post

      Nice read and I totaly agree.
      Thanks bro! So important to provide value in anything that you do.
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  • Profile picture of the author Adrianhenry
    7 habits is a great book! I recommend it to anyone who hasnt read it
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    • Profile picture of the author ElGuapo
      I don't mean to rock the boat, but couldn't this just be summarised as 'Do good work and probably get rewarded for it'?
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by Adrianhenry View Post

      7 habits is a great book! I recommend it to anyone who hasnt read it
      Yeah, awesome book! I think the next book I'm going to read from Stephen is the 8th Habit :-)
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      • Profile picture of the author Adrianhenry
        Originally Posted by BrokeringSchool View Post

        Yeah, awesome book! I think the next book I'm going to read from Stephen is the 8th Habit :-)
        Yeh my flat mate has the 8th habit book but I haven't got round to borrowing it yet.
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        • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
          Originally Posted by Adrianhenry View Post

          Yeh my flat mate has the 8th habit book but I haven't got round to borrowing it yet.
          Ahh, let me know what it's like man - I really want to give that a read after I've finished the Tony Robbins book I'm reading :-)
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    • Profile picture of the author Altered State
      Originally Posted by Adrianhenry View Post

      7 habits is a great book! I recommend it to anyone who hasnt read it
      What are those 7 habits that the book talks about, just for curiosity?


      Edit:

      Found them on wikipedia, I'll post them here just in case someone else is interested. It happens to be a book from 1989

      Independence[edit]
      The First Three Habits surround moving from dependence to independence (i.e., self-mastery):
      1 - Be Proactive
      Take initiative in life by realizing that your decisions (and how they align with life's principles) are the primary determining factor for effectiveness in your life. Take responsibility for your choices and the consequences that follow.
      2 - Begin with the End in Mind
      Self-discover and clarify your deeply important character values and life goals. Envision the ideal characteristics for each of your various roles and relationships in life.
      3 - Put First Things First
      A manager must manage his own person. Personally. And managers should implement activities that aim to reach the second habit. Covey says that rule two is the mental creation; rule three is the physical creation.
      Interdependence[edit]
      The next three habits talk about Interdependence (e.g. working with others):
      4 - Think Win-Win
      Genuine feelings for mutually beneficial solutions or agreements in your relationships. Value and respect people by understanding a "win" for all is ultimately a better long-term resolution than if only one person in the situation had gotten his way.
      5 - Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood
      Use empathic listening to be genuinely influenced by a person, which compels them to reciprocate the listening and take an open mind to being influenced by you. This creates an atmosphere of caring, and positive problem solving.
      6 - Synergize
      Combine the strengths of people through positive teamwork, so as to achieve goals no one person could have done alone.
      Continuous Improvements[edit]
      The final habit is that of continuous improvement in both the personal and interpersonal spheres of influence.
      7 - Sharpen the Saw
      Balance and renew your resources, energy, and health to create a sustainable, long-term, effective lifestyle. It primarily emphasizes exercise for physical renewal, prayer (meditation, yoga, etc.) and good reading for mental renewal. It also mentions service to society for spiritual renewal.
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  • Profile picture of the author .X.
    I think the most important thing you wrote is:

    "Be genuine. Be you."

    "Giving" need not mean anything other than giving
    people something they won't find elsewhere.

    More and more effective marketing is based on
    being authentic and open. Is there anything more
    giving than risking your own emotional comfort
    zone?

    Too many people want cookie cutter formulas
    while failing to embrace they are the best thing
    their business has to offer.

    X
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  • Profile picture of the author jayden1981
    yes i totally agree with this 100%
    give value first then reap the rewards later
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    http://www.memoryrameka.com

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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by jayden1981 View Post

      yes i totally agree with this 100%
      give value first then reap the rewards later
      Exactly! People really underestimate the power of good customer service these days - to build a genuine relationship with your clients.
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  • Profile picture of the author skyro
    Nice post and also another good book to check out is Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion which talks a bit about reciprocity and a few other methods of being a good marketer as well.
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by skyro View Post

      Nice post and also another good book to check out is Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion which talks a bit about reciprocity and a few other methods of being a good marketer as well.
      Awesome stuff! I'll definitely give it a read :-)
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  • Profile picture of the author Corey Taylor
    When we think about the client's quality first then money comes to you easily. Fantastic post, thanked!
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by Corey Taylor View Post

      When we think about the client's quality first then money comes to you easily. Fantastic post, thanked!
      Thanks Corey - no problem bro!
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  • Profile picture of the author IvoryPearl
    I love your post...couldn't have said it better myself...thanks!
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    • Profile picture of the author Jason Jacoby
      Thanks for the thread, I totally agree. If you offer something of value, people will naturally come back to you and want to give you money for other valuable content/items/services.
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      • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
        Originally Posted by Jason Jacoby View Post

        Thanks for the thread, I totally agree. If you offer something of value, people will naturally come back to you and want to give you money for other valuable content/items/services.
        Exactly Jason! The Law of Reciprocity :-)

        Always focus on how you can provide more value, and the money is just a bi-product.
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by IvoryPearl View Post

      I love your post...couldn't have said it better myself...thanks!
      Thanks Ivory! People really underestimate the power of giving first, not just from a business stand point - but in life in general.
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  • Profile picture of the author ptcrefko
    Dig first, money later.

    - The Count of Monte Cristo Movie
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  • Profile picture of the author ninosem
    it's all about providing value, branding, and building the Know, Like, Trust factor.
    You've got to distinguish yourself from all of the "noise" out there and show that you're a real person providing real value...
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by discrat View Post

      Thanks Brokering.

      ~You should Post more



      - Robert Andrew
      Thanks Robert!

      Yeah I'll try and get more posts out there - I just like to throw my thoughts out there and if it helps someone... awesome!

      Originally Posted by ninosem View Post

      it's all about providing value, branding, and building the Know, Like, Trust factor.
      You've got to distinguish yourself from all of the "noise" out there and show that you're a real person providing real value...
      Exactly. You've got to set yourself aside from the rest of the competition and the BEST way to do that (I've found from personal experience and studying successful marketers) - is to provide value first and be YOU - don't try and be someone you're not - BE YOU. BE GENUINE.
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  • Profile picture of the author H.Miller
    Totally agree with everything you just said. Its all about providing massive value to your market. When you do you will never have a problem making money.
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    • Profile picture of the author Zak L.
      Originally Posted by H.Miller View Post

      Totally agree with everything you just said. Its all about providing massive value to your market. When you do you will never have a problem making money.
      So true.

      You immediately set yourself aside from the rest of the competition when you do this.
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