I'm Curious... What do YOU do when you get RUDE Replies to emails?

If your emails look like spam that is the response you will get. If you send an "offer" every 2 weeks to your list you are going to piss many of them off.

It's really challenging when people are rude to you, and so often you just want to let it out right back at them. I always try to ask myself the question "What benefit do I get out of ________ response" and to make a logical choice rather than an emotional one.

That said, my partner ends up being the one who hears all about it, hehehe.

I ignore them and remove them. Simple.

Kill them.....





...with kindness. LOL

Then wash your hands of it and move on.

Allen

I did not mean to come off too scathing but I unsubscribed to so many lists this last month alone because I was getting inundated with so many of the same "launches" it made me want to tell a few of them off. Instead I hit the unsubscribe button.

You just have to put it in perspective. If a Paying customer said that to your employee and the employee fired back, what would you do as the business owner - understanding that you may be able to sell this guy/gal in the future and they may tell friends who you can sell as well...

Ultimately, it is YOUR list and YOUR prospect (meaning YOUR money). If they give you heart ache get rid of them. If you want to fire back - go for it. But I wouldn't. I would smile, delete it - and keep trying to sell them...

js

I have to admit... today I sent one back - AFTER I unsubbed them. All I said was

"Thank you! You have been removed from my list."

Sign up for a few CPA offers using their email address, and place their email address on a few sites around the web to feed the spam bots. In a week or so, they'll get a taste of what real spam is.

Of course I'd never do these things, but I have heard stories.....

At first it got to me and a couple of times my email reply was all typed up and ready
to go but I always ended up deleting it... but it sure felt good to write it

Now, I just delete them from my list... and move on!

Cheers,
Pete

Human nature my friend. There will always be someone out there doing that.

If you are not spamming them then just hit the delete key and go on to something that helps your business rather than drains your energy.

It used to upset me but now I just yell "NEXT"!

Good luck

Sid

I believe its best to offer them something special and try to make a deal!

Hey Jenn you one sexy mama!

I usually just do a little "Goose Fraba"
and than reply with something like:

"you can unsubscribe by hitting the "unsubscribe" button"

Igor

I have one person that has an automated response as I get the same response every time I send a broadcast. The thing is I searched my subscriber list for her email but it says there is no such email in my subscriber base, so I can't delete her. I just delete it every time now, its a bit annoying but I can't work out how I'm sending her emails when her email isn't showing in my subscriber list.

1. Highlight the message in my Thunderbird inbox
2. Press the "Delete" key
3. Log into my autoresonder
4. Search for their e-mail address
5. Manually remove them from the list.

I find that when I get a f@%&* off! message from a subscriber it's usually because they've signed up to my list twice with two different e-mail addresses but only unsubscribed using one of them.

1 - Smile
2 - Delete them
3 - Eat another piece of cake

In my experience the bigger the list the more this will happen ... especially slightly older lists.

I just do what you do and unsubscribe ... fact is you can't please everyone all the time.

For every rare occasion I get a negative response I get a lot more positive responders ... just an IM fact of life

To a reply like that? No, I'd never write back. Back when I ran a mailing list, I'd simply remove them and forget about them.

If I got a rude reply that asked or invited a serious response (e.g. I've tried all these products, but you guys are all crooks, so why should I trust you?), I would reply, and discipline myself to do it this way...

• Give myself whatever time I needed to calm down
• Rationalise the rudeness: it might be my interpretation, or the person may lack social graces, or the person may have even been drunk!
• Deliberately take the question seriously, and ignore the rude replies
• Write a painstaking and thorough answer to the question. I would literally tell my story, and make my case
• I would then carefully scrutinise the reply, and make sure I hadn't succumbed to the temptation to be sarcastic, or rise to the rudeness in any way, shape or form. I wanted the respondent to understand that I'd taken their question seriously, and put a lot of thought into the reply (without me having to say so, of course - it had to be self-evident)

This isn't easy to do, especially if you're a gifted writer. It's oh-so-easy and very tempting to lapse into sarcasm and start attacking back. It's probably human nature.

However, I found a mature and sensible reply worked wonders. I have even received apologies from shame-faced marketing folk who had clearly lashed out and now felt guilty!

I always ignored both the initial rudeness, and any apology. But I always wrote back with a couple more ideas, tips, suggestions or whatever to acknowledge the reply. I also won a few clients this way. It's not impossible to believe somebody who writes a letter like "you guys are all crooks, why should I trust you?" is actually saying "I'm looking for somebody honest, who can help me with my marketing" (or whatever would apply in your case).

What ever you do just don't let it get you down, there are always going to be a few people on your list that act like this. Just ignore them.

Cheers

Hi winebuddy,

I know how that sort of response makes you feel. I do a lot of business on ebay and amazon and sell collectable CD's and DVD's. I also sell bog standard ones too and they are the ones that cause problems! I recently sold a CD single for £27.00 and the feedback from the customer was fantastic....I also sold an xbox game for 99p with 99p postage and the customer gave me bad feedback as they thought the postage was too expensive!!

My response...after peeling myself off the ceiling, taking a cold shower, walking for 10 miles...I then replied to the customer explaining that if they returned the item I would refund the postage!

I read a good way to deal with negativity the other day in a book called Psycho Cybernetics - imagine you have a calculator and when anything negative happens to you just hit the CLEAR button on the calculator and move on....works for me.

Just deal with the good customers and remember Pareto's rule 80% of your income will come from 20% of your customers - the positive happy ones!!

Cheers
Keith

I'm minded to just stay professional at all times and just ignore any rude emails. I see IM as important as my job (maybe more so!) and being rude back will reduce credibility etc.

Like others have said, there are people like this in all walks of life, and the problem is theirs, not yours. Just laugh at 'em!

Sending a offer every 2 weeks doesn't seem like a lot. But then again, I'm used to be bombarded everyday with offers from a couple well known IMers. What to do? Ignore those emails, don't give them what they want: your attention.

Tyrus

It's not personal. Just unsub them and move on. Easier said than done some days... but never ever reply in anger or say anything you wouldn't want on Youtube, the web or some other public site. A moments anger will haunt you for a lifetime online

They're retarded!

It's not their fault. Look them up, unsubscribe them, and move on with your life.

I don't have a list either but if I did...I would probably reply with something very kind like...I am sorry to have bothered you. I didn't realize you didn't know that the unsubscribe link was at the bottom of your email when you signed up to get emails from me. Turns it back on them politely.

I have had this problem too and you know what it doesn't actually bother me at all. In fact a few times I have managed to turn the situation around to my advantage.

Here's how I did it...

Reply to them and thank them for the feedback, and how you appreciate honesty from your subscribers. Do mention though that you felt the tone of their feedback was a bit offensive and possibly slightly unneccessary, although you do appreciate that sometimes people do have bad days. Explain how you don't mean to bug them but are genuinely interested in providing something that would add some value to them and at the same time hopefully offer a solution to their problem.

If they didn't unsubscribe then explain to them how to and that you are not a spammer, but also explain that you'd love to keep them as a subscriber (and add jocularly) as long as they stop sending you offensive emails.

Quite often I get an email back with an apology.

For example: one guy emailed me back the next day and told me he had just lost his job and was in a quandary what to do, money was tight and the last thing he wanted to do was spend money on the niche product that I was selling him. He also explained that he didn't even remember sending me the email as he had got royally drunk the night before and he apologised profusely for any harm he had caused. I replied emphasising my sympathy toward his plight, wishing him the best of luck in finding a new job and politely but jokingly asked him not to go any where near a computer next time he drinks alcohol.

A few weeks later he sent me an email to say that he'd got a new job, the rum was replenished and everything in the garden was rosy. He also said he would like to purchase my product once payday came around, which he did, $27 for the main product, $7 a month recurring income for the upsell.

This is also not an isolated incident, I have actually had similar success by politely, empathetically and assertively replying to abusive emails from my subscribers, it's just that this one sticks in my mind because the guy in question emails me about once a month with how he is getting on with my products.

Yeah, admittedly some people have taken even more offence because I prefer and enjoy replying to their abusive rants, but a lot haven't, and have sent me a written apology and continued to be my subscriber.

I suppose the moral of this is don't take things so personally and be nice to your subscribers, it doesn't cost anything does it? Accept the fact that some people have bad days, and that some people are not particularly polite or considerate in how they articulate their frustrations and pains, nor do they care who they vent to or what medium they choose to do it with.

How often have you received a call from a telephone sales operative trying to sell you double glazing at the most inappropriate and intrusive time? How often have you felt tempted to tell them where they can shove their double glazing? Maybe your email landed in your subscribers inbox at a similar moment in time.

Why should they unsubscribe, for whatever reason they have sent a message. They have won because you are upset by that message and it unsettles you. The fact that it does means that you are carrying negative energy around with you for a period of time afterwards and you get less work done. Or it upsets your digestion, to it makes you write and ask a question here in the forum.

I am in no way criticising you for asking how others deal with it, but I am making the point that their actions have been far more effective than simply unsubbing.

What do I do about it, unsub them and ignore them, but try not to get emotioanlly attached to their decision.
La dominatrix

I usually send a reply saying "thank you. Your email address has been removed from my subscriber list."

Theresa

I get emails like that every few weeks. I think that everyone once in a while get these kinds of emails too.

You have 2 options:

Option #1: Respond to that person and ask them why they would say such a thing. Ask them what they disliked about your newsletter. You may get a response back or you may not.

Option #2: Take a look at that email. Laugh at it and DELETE IT. Then move on and forget about it.

Me personally, I would take option #2. I don't want to waste my precious time with people who tell me to #$RQ#$# myself. I just delete it and move on.

Tal

Well - a few years ago I had a 3,000 + business school graduate coaching list - double opt in etc etc. Anyhow, I got a couple or really offensive, rude emails suggesting that I had spammed this guy.

It so happened that I could find out exactly where he lived, and his mobile number ( advantages of a professionals list - pre social networks).

I phoned him up. Said I had unsubscribed him but that I'd been surprised by his rudeness.

Collapse at the other end. Embarrassment. Apologetic etc etc.

I haven't ever done it since but it did make me realise that there's a human being behind the garbage they send!

Just ignore it, and focus on building your business.. dont let bottom feeders waste your time or ruin your mood.

I have an autoresponder set up for my email broadcasts... if someone replies to me it says go to my support desk for customer/products issues.. or I also list an email address to get in touch with me personally... almost nobody sends me rude replies there.

Send them this -

"Darling Unsubscriber,

Thank you so much for your wonderful, uplifting, and beautiful email. You can scarcely imagine what a difference such poignant prose makes to the life of a lonely marketer, chained as we are to our desks, fondly trying to remember the last time we had any contact with human beings.

Your eloquence, wit, and sense of joy and love are a true inspiration. Are you, by any chance, descended from Shakespeare? Oh, how I wish I owned a proper publishing house instead of this silly Internet thing. I could bring your literary genius to the world, and we could make our fortunes as we danced off into the sunset together, hands held and fingers entwined. I cannot find the words to express the gratitude I feel at the deep insight, profundity and depth of meaning you have brought to my life. Byron, Keats and Wordsworth no longer hold any meaning for me.

I have to humbly confess that, even as a writer, my vocabulary can in no way compare with yours. I must ask you as a grovelling favor if you could please explain to me what *&^&%^* and &%^&+%^$ mean, as I am quite unfamiliar with the terms. I presume as you have included them in your love letter that they must be phrases of endearment, but they are quite unknown to me. That is what comes from having such a sheltered upbringing.

I have to confess, though, that I did detect a slight note of terseness in your communication, as though your love may be waning slightly. I fully realise that my humble emails are quite unworthy of comparison with your masterly prose, but they were meant with sincerity and a kind heart. Electronic communication does not permit me to do as I would wish, and send a letter to you on pink scented notepaper, in an envelope sealed with wax, and accompanied with a bouquet of roses adorned with ribbons of all colors of the rainbow.

As I find myself so totally unworthy and undeserving of your attention, I regret this will be my last communication. As a token of the special times we have shared, I have made it my mission to find you a love who is more on your own elevated level. I have placed your email address on a great many public forums in the hope that the Internet dating Cupid spambots can find you some suitable companions. As a lover of passion, you will doubtless love the Viagra offers which will soon flood to you, and I know the porno emails will excite and thrill you. You need to be punctual to keep dates, so I'm sure you will appreciate the fake watch emails as well.

I aim only to serve you. I am heartbroken, but, as you can see, ever helpful.

Goodbye darling."

I will personally reply the email at least once.

If the person still reply back with a rude reply, I will just delete them from my list.

It will be better to use the time wisely on subscribers who are genuinely interested in the services that you are providing

Zack

Don't lower yourself to their level, they'll drag you down and beat you with their experience

I once received one saying F*** off i hate spam and i was in a bad mood at the time as i had been working all day and couldnt be bothered with someone like this that had double opted in so i sent back:

thanks for your email i hate spam too it can be a real pain thats why i bet your so glad that i dont spam you.

she sent back F***ing unsubscribe me now or i will call the police

there was no way i was going to respond to that so i ignored it and never heard from her again until i noticed about two months later that she had unsubscribed. But in between this she bought three of my subscriber offers. so this behaviour was from one of my customers!!!!

I dont see why they need to act like this they subscribed, they confirmed and if their not happy they can very easily unsubscribe.

I only email my list once every four days so imagine what she would have said on one of these lists were you get emailed twice a day!!!

kind regards


sam
X

I usually reply to them very nicely and let them know the reason they received the email is because they subscribed to it, but that they will not be receiving any further emails, and wish them a good day. No need to let them get into your head.

Yeah, nothing to see here, move on type attitude for me. I unsub them and move on with my life. I try to give 0 energy to people like that.

Garret

this reminds me of a story,

which i cant remember lol

Personally I always sned them an email back that says "dear suscriber, you may be right!"

regards Mark

then I have a cup of tea lol

Frankly, I just ignore them and delete them from my list if needed. These are people whom you shouldn't be wasting your time on. Even sending a reply, just shows you are giving them attention which is probably what they are seeking.

I've only ever had one 'rude' reply and that was one guy telling me I was wrong to be honest.

I just thanked him in a reply and left it at that.

It's not worth getting worked up over one or two from a list of hundreds or thousands.

There's all sorts in the world, why not online.

I'd add them to an new list (seemingly the same) which sends out reminders every day on how they can unsubscribe...until they do, I'd keep messaging them.<-- that's if I was feeling rebellious.

Thinking professionally, I would simply delete the message and move on. They can unsubscribe when they learn how.

Thinking constructively, I'd realize that these are the most resistant people on my list and so would be useful to gain some insight into why they are so negative towards me or my emails. With that in mind, I'd reply saying I was sorry and will remove them from the list but also ask them why they signed up and what they didn't like..

ignore ignore ignore is all you must do. That's the best and wise solution...

Here's my life mantra (that I always keep posted on my white board) which gets me though almost any situation where there's always that frustration factor at play - whether it be making a sale, responding to e-mails, or even finding a good outsourcer:

SWSWSW

Some
Will
Some
Won't
So
What

I just delete them and use my time to be productive and make more money

I've never had overtly rude emails but there's been a couple that have been rather terse. I deal with them professionally and try to answer any questions to the best of my ability.

Youtube is where I've received the ruder comments, although again there's not been too many thankfully. I just delete those since they don't add to the conversation. I'm all for constructive critism but "this is gay!" doesn't help anyone.