Feeling like my squeeze page is too simple.

18 replies
Normally, I would've outsourced squeeze page creation but this time around I'm starting from the ground up.

My plan is to build a list in the dog market and advertise products to this list through email marketing. This is the first squeeze page I've created for this market, can you guys give me any critiques? Can't help but feel like it's too simple because it didn't take too long to put together. Just want to know if any last minute changes might boost conversion rate before I start putting money into testing.

I thought about adding an e-cover to the page, but I feel like it would take up too much space for what it's worth.

Squeeze Page: http://www.thenotoriousdog.com/insta...-11-03-202253/
#feeling #page #simple #squeeze
  • Profile picture of the author VidasVegas
    If you have a feeling that your page is too simple - change it to get results.
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  • Profile picture of the author boblyle
    Personally I would somehow try to make my bullet points above the fold.Just my opinion.
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  • Profile picture of the author ReachOneMedia
    keep it simple...

    Concentrate on copy instead of graphics.

    Bullet point should go even deeper in the problems and pains of barking dog owners

    What will happen to them if the dogs bark too much?

    Police... animal rescue team... kids/grandkids who fear to visits... neighbor hate you... dog fight

    I think you got the point
    J
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    • Profile picture of the author iRunThis
      Originally Posted by ReachOneMedia View Post

      keep it simple...

      Concentrate on copy instead of graphics.

      Bullet point should go even deeper in the problems and pains of barking dog owners

      What will happen to them if the dogs bark too much?

      Police... animal rescue team... kids/grandkids who fear to visits... neighbor hate you... dog fight

      I think you got the point
      J
      This helped a lot, going to rewrite the copy when I leave the day job.

      What do you think about the headline? Does it grab your attention? Does it pique enough curiosity to make you want to check out the bullet points?

      I'm not the best with copywriting. Just know the basics

      EDIT: Actually, I should probably be asking around in the copywriting forum at this point. But I'm also interested to hear your opinion.
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      • Profile picture of the author ReachOneMedia
        Originally Posted by iRunThis View Post

        This helped a lot, going to rewrite the copy when I leave the day job.

        What do you think about the headline? Does it grab your attention? Does it pique enough curiosity to make you want to check out the bullet points?

        I'm not the best with copywriting. Just know the basics

        EDIT: Actually, I should probably be asking around in the copywriting forum at this point. But I'm also interested to hear your opinion.
        I would work the headline as well...
        asking the copywriting forum is a great idea

        Have a look at your competitor on clickbank or elsewhere and see what they are doing... study the "real problems"
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  • Profile picture of the author Steve B
    I agree with BobLyle, try to keep the entire page above the fold so the viewer can see everything without scrolling.

    In addition, I would try to make the squeeze page responsive so that mobile viewers can easily view the page and respond.

    Good luck with this project.

    Steve
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  • Profile picture of the author AMarketingKing
    I would re-do the video. It's off topic to the point you're making
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  • Profile picture of the author tristatemedia
    by the way do not forget to give something away and man.................man..............collect the leads. and market to them other dog products. you will be shocked how will it works
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  • Profile picture of the author shaunybb
    When doing squeeze pages you need to keep things flowing


    your video has nothing to do with the headline of dogs barking loud


    it totally threw me off, I expected a clever little video of some really loud dogs


    and then just before it ends you can start leading into the "secret command" but only show a little bit...
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  • Profile picture of the author Edwin Torres
    My first impression: Ugly and unprofessional. If I was your target prospect I wouldn't enter my email in.

    1. Get a cleaner, slicker squeeze page design

    2. Remove the video at the top... detracts from your message

    3. Make sure copy smoother... Put more benefits... Put more curiosity.
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  • Profile picture of the author Junaid khawaja
    Why are you not expanding on your bullet points?

    For example "Learn one very powerful word in order to command silence" ...

    can be rewritten as " Learn one very powerful word that literally puts your dog in mouth-shut silence...and rescues your guests from being Dog-bullied.

    Notice how I have used high-arousal words.
    Also, notice how I have linked a feature with a benefit.

    Thanks
    Junaid

    P.S placing video at the very top is demanding more work from your prospect.
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  • Profile picture of the author markGustaff
    Why have you put there video? It's strange. Remove it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Randy McLean
    The less options you give your visitor the better. Some might be reluctant to give you their name for example.

    Simple is good. Look at Google and see how simple their page is. No distractions at all.

    The headline is the most important thing of all. If I am marketing an affiliate program I will actually tweak the headline of the product I am selling.

    They have done all the testing and know what works. In the end it matters more what you say than how your page looks.

    You have to figure out what keeps your prospect up at night.
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  • Profile picture of the author kuki15
    Hey iRunThis,

    I agree with all Warriors that submitted their comment on your post. Yes, keeping it simple and clean is the way to go.
    A. Headline at the top of the video instead of the bottom (it just makes sense).
    B. Keep everything above the fold.
    C. If your video can tell the story then you won't need the point's you have jotted below the fold (this will surely keep your main squeeze page area above the fold).
    D) An attention grabbing CTA right at the top of your squeeze page will really help as well (eg "To All Dog Owners, Dog Lovers and Like Minders!")

    I have a squeeze page if you like to check it out for pointers. I'm in the MMO niche but the same principals still apply, even if your in the Dog Niche. That squeeze page converts at 54% and I'm still working on it. It doesn't have a video but I'm working on a similar page but with video, so that I can split test. Let me know what you think and I hope this helps: EJP LP2
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  • Profile picture of the author RefuseToLose
    After looking over your page, you might want to go back to outsourcing if you don't think you'll have time to learn copywriting.

    It's not bad for your first try so I'm not trying to make you feel bad...

    But this page is a perfect example of what every new person does when they attempt marketing on their own for the first time.

    Let me give you some feedback:

    1. The video. It has to go. The only relevance it has to your product is there is a dog in it. Totally useless in your overall goal of getting someone to sign up.

    I see this a lot with new marketers. They think empty space is bad or that they need something like a video to make the website 'look better'. The problem is you should never have any elements in your landing page that doesn't move someone towards the overall goal. This video is pointless in that regard.


    2. The headline and introduction aren't that bad for someone new to this, but you need to work on crafting a better worded and more powerful benefit driven headline.


    3. The bullet points are weak. You need to emphasize the benefits here with the headline...

    here's a quick example: "Discover the powerful command that will silence even the most aggressive barking dog instantly with one word..."

    and the bullets reinforce that headline benefit you promised

    "On page 11 you'll discover the one word command that will silence any dog barking instantly so you're friends and family aren't annoyed by loud barking every time they come over to visit you."

    or whatever your ideal customers major problems are you are trying to solve. List the feature + benefit together.


    4. The actual form section just has basic template copy. you need to change that and make it more enticing with relevant sales copy.


    This is just a basic outline. There is a lot more to this than just putting a headline and bullet points on a page and expecting someone to just hand over their information. I suggest you go to the copywriting section and read up on some recommended material.

    In fact start with one of my favorite books. It's called Ca$hvertising.
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  • Profile picture of the author johnben1444
    Most of the top money making sites are simple and straight to the point.

    Aside the things mentioned here, I think the squeeze page is pretty okay except you need more compelling content.
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  • Profile picture of the author aizaku
    i'd say it's too complicated...


    make it simpler and keep it all above the fold...


    that being said. maybe im wrong, you gotta test to see converts.


    -Ike Paz
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  • Profile picture of the author Djwillster123
    Sometimes simple squeeze pages are the highest converting
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