How to Ask Someone to Be Your Mentor?

There is no limitation of learning. Anyone can be your mentor. Only you can decide that who will be better for you and who can give you a better suggestion.

Careful not to overthink.

The route to success IM was a much different walk when I began. I found an affiliate program, first, and it had a forum, not unlike this one. The good people on that forum were my early IM educators.

Little later on, not much later, I fell in with the right crowd on another forum, that grew from many of the members present in the first forum, and it was there that I began to come into my own.

At that stage quite a lot of luck intervened. I fell in with the right person, and having done so, it opened the flood gates (due to knowing him) to a great many other right people.

It was the association with that chap and the others that quickly elevated my abilities. And they chose me not because I asked, but because they simply liked my company.

Throughout it all, though? 23 years? Almost 24?

My greatest educator has been myself.

This is the score. When you decide to become an online marketer, when you properly take the plunge and leave Offline behind, the buck stops with you.

The money buck.

Otherwise known as the mortgage buck, the groceries buck, the pocket money for your daughter buck. And various other bucks. They stop with you.

And when the buck stops with you in IM? When you have no choice, in other words, but to earn? To make those bucks all nice and happy?

Trust me on this - you become one hell of an educator.

I grew up with money. And yet, when I entered IM, I was earning a big fat zero. And - like all of us - I still had bills to pay. The inheritance had been spent during my university days. I had no choice but to earn.

And that's my real point here.

Whether you work full-time in IM, or whether you hold down an offline career and work on IM in your spare time, you must understand something:

If you wish to stay living in IM Land, where each of us work for a living, then you must earn. There is no choice. There is no maybe you will, maybe you won't.

No choice.

The very best of us? We don't need motivating. We don't need to be cheerful about the working day. We don't need people to be nice to us. Because we know something: we won't ever return to Offline.

We make a hard decision to stay in IM, no matter what.

When you give yourself no choice?

You become the best educator you will ever know.

If you absolutely feel the need for a second educator - or a mentor and educator, because there's a difference between the two - then seek one out when you know your own direction.

Each of us travel different paths in IM.

The educator you choose? Make sure that he or she is on the same path.

And far down it.

- Tom

Why not?

I probably have 50 of those in my unread PMs. That's after I read the first 50 or so.

Brent

Just walk up to them, email them or however you can Contact them and simply ask for them to mentor you. Don't over think stuff you'll never know if you don't try.

Differentiate between coaches and mentors. Coaches are paid to guide you and often limit their network. Ah mentors are a delight - not only are they assisting you because they want to (often getting a thrill from your success - and yeah sometimes some upside).

But how to find a mentor... Look at your tribe, the folks that you interact with most often. Are these people that can help guide you? If not, change your tribe. You might have heard the saying that "you are most like the average of the 5 people around you that you spend the most time with". I observed this years ago. My friends were folks who had a 9-5 mid-level corporate job, house with mortgage, 401K and family. Not entrepreneurs. I changed the folks I connected with and now spend time with business owners and entrepreneurs. Not that I rejected my other friends - we still watch the Giants get destroyed every weekend, but we don't talk shop. From the new tribe, I have met a couple of fascinating folks and one in particular has been assisting me in one of my businesses that I wanted to grow. Not only has he pointed out my mistakes but also has introduced me to folks I would have never as easily connected with. And that connection is a tremendous value add.

That said, become a mentor yourself. I am assisting a firm in the CBD space and not only am I helping their business but I am again widening my tribe. Who knows - somewhere in that broader tribe will be another mentor for me.

I would start by talking to them and if possible show what value you can bring to them as well, it has to be a two way street...

tbh I would not feel too happy 'bout anywan prostratin' 'emselves at my feet.

Partly, this is cos I a Princess an' experience this grovelismo phenomenon by default jus' cos I breathe proto-sovreign air -- but mostly it is bcs I don't want no delooded zealots throwin' up over my best heels.

Gotta figure Tommo le Pipe has a cogent point to make here.

Gonna cut & paste cos I gowin' now an' it is effort to figure QUOTE without losin' what I got so far ...

"You become the best educator you will ever know."

Problem with bein' a desperado -- or an enthoosiast if'n you wanna play positive -- is how you gotta wish always to discriminate between available options.

You a desperado (or an enthoosiast), initial options (or viewpoint choices) may be singular ... an' so temptin' you mebbe could fire off ZEST EXPERIENCE HORMONES from offa your eyeballs at the kinda theme park watersplash ride level cos'n you so thrilled out.

But that don't make for no ideal match between persons.

Cos conflux is kinda necessary an' sweet, but always our worst case scenario is how we the last person alive on the planet.

Don't wanna figure no Apocalypse narratives here (though as a Millennial, reelin' from max THEM OR US stress in a Cosmos carin' not for Moi, prolly I would still wanna look in on home-cook noodles), but our individyool interactions ultimately commit us to steps forward we choose for our stoopid selves.

Gotta love anywan helped me figure direction on my wanna, but ultimately I gotta play benevolent vamp on the deal.

So I would wanna figure the HOW in the original Mentor Ask question takes a cool second shot to the WHOM?

Ain't it so troo how our gravitational an' orbital exotica kinda dictates the spaces we inhabit an' open up before us?

Max infodump counsel can say no more than ...

"over to you" --

an' it is from the subsequent crucible of uncertainty that the next buncha crapola happens.

Hi C: easiest is: Hire Them.

As a guy who gets asked to be a blogging mentor, the easiest way to get me to help you is to hire for my services. I am incredibly busy building my blogging business. Plus I have helped people for free 10,000 plus time over the past year: they are called: free blog posts, free videos, free podcasts, free Warrior Forum responses. If you want someone to mentor you, just send 'em money buddy and they will do it. Easy.

Be sure to understand the difference between a mentor and a coach. A mentor would never ask for money as they provide the training as a way to 'give back.' This is something you will here people claim to do, but something they don't actually do.

A coach generally charges for their services. Basically, they are a business instructor.

Never, ever deal with someone who doesn't have a basic understanding of the difference of the two models. They're not qualified to teach you anything of value.

You don't need a mentor or coach. You have all the information at your fingertips. You need to learn how to research and make decisions. There's so many ways to monetize online. Learn and develop your skills so that you don't ever have to depend on anybody.

For example, I learned linux cloud hosting. Received $300 in free hosting. Learned how to get a free SSL. Learned the gist of html, css, php, jquery, javascript, nodejs, python, sql, amp pages, adwords, social media marketing etc.......

I have a boat load of degrees and certifications but all that doesn't matter in online marketing. It's your skills and content.

Why? To be in full control of online marketing irrespective of gurus, consultants, and coaches.

And it feels amazing...

Some people do influencer marketing but there's a whole world of digital marketers who make much more staying under the radar.

Make a vow to yourself to learn and make it through. And to never return to an offline job.

Good luck!

To Ryan's point, do something FOR the person you want to mentor you...could be paying them, could be connecting them, could be performing some sort of service that is of value to them, etc...

I can't tell you how many people approach me out of the blue and ask for something...not only is this NOT how relationships work in "Real life", it indicates to me this is not the type of person I want to work with (self-starter, person of action, someone who knows how to get results)

Here are 3 reasons that doing something for your prospective mentor works best:

- It sets you above 99% of others who simply want something for nothing...it gets you to the top of the list and *may* get you the attention of someone very busy
- It proves to your mentor that you understand relationships, that you are willing to WORK and not just ask for handouts and that you care enough about yourself and your mentor to offer something of value back
- It tells him or her a lot about your character -- when you achieve a certain level of success you become very selective about the people you choose to spend your time with. You want them to be equally as positive, action-oriented, aligned with where you want to go in business and life, to be fun and to be teachable/coachable as well as trustworthy and credible.

I can tell you there are very few people that approach seeking mentors this way...yet if you do your chances of success will go up exponentially

Jeff

I think there are many ways to approach them. Connect with them on Linkedin, you can email them and also attend various events where you can get to know them in person. Good luck!

If you're intent on getting a good mentor?

1. Become their friend.

2. Offer them money.

3. Offer them something else of value.

No matter which route you take, however, the one proviso is that you convince them of your potential to succeed.

A serious mentor?

He will only help those who can be helped.

To give you a little more insight into how to get a mentor . . .

I tutor people, primarily, for pleasure.

Just like most good ideas? It came from my wife.

A few years back now, I had arrived at a place in my career where I felt that I had no further mountains to climb.

I knew how to earn money.

I knew how to do everything I was interested in doing.

For the first time in my career?

(And this lasted for months.)

The work had become a grind.

I was - nutshell - pretty bloody bored.

And then my wife suggested that I teach IM.

An idea that I immediately shot down.

I forgot all about the good people who had helped me at the start of my career.

Who had, really, shaped me as much as they had taught me.

I thought only of the road.

The road?

At the time - back a few years now - I had walked a career road for almost two decades.

I had worked long hours.

I had often given up weekends.

I had spent a lot of money.

I had walked a road, to become a professional marketer, that had not been an easy road to walk.

That said?

And totally forgetting nice people who had helped me at the start of my career?

I thought: "Why should I give up the goods? It wouldn't be fair. If someone wants to succeed? They should walk the same road I have walked."

Now, what I'm about to say?

I never said it.

THIS: My wife is rarely wrong about anything.

And never wrong about anything truly important.

On this occasion?

Well - it was no different.

You need a new mountain to climb, she told me.

You love online marketing.

You enjoy being sociable.

I think you'd get a kick, she finished, by teaching in your spare time.

I disagreed. For months. But, as I always do with Mrs. A, I eventually caved.

And I'm glad I did.

Going back to a point I made earlier now.

This one:

A good mentor? He or she has no trouble making money.

If you pay for his or her time, what you may well be paying for are his or her fees to outsource the work they would be doing if not engaged in teaching you.

You are - in short - freeing up their time to engage in their passion: teaching, mentoring, whatever you wish to call it.

So, money aside?

What makes a mentor say yes?

Speaking for myself:

- I need to like the person.

- I need to know they have potential.

- I need to feel they deserve help.

It is a great pleasure hanging out with someone you like. IM can be a solitary profession, after all.

It is an even greater pleasure helping them succeed.

- Tom

Now a days, there are a lot of mentors providing mentorship service for high price. But the person who is availing it should try his best to get the best from the mentor. Otherwise, there will be nothing but wasting money and time.

Most if not all of the IM mentors, have there websites that you can visit! However you will have to pay for the mentor-ship. There is nothing called a "free Lunch"

Sure you can. Or something of the sort.
Just ask. I've had people do so over the years and often helped them. Entire orgs exist just for this purpose on the local level (SBA and innovation mentor groups, etc.).

I'm having similar troubles posting questions on stackexchange websites.

Hmm... If someone asked me that I would not feel I am qualified. But if someone asked me can I buy you a coffee/beer I would like that more than someone asking Can I access your consulting services without pay?

Simply go up to them, email them or anyway you can Contact them and just request them to guide you. Don't over think stuff you'll never know whether you don't attempt.

All of my mentors came through YouTube and books. That is the beauty of the information age. I have different mentors for different things: one for MLM, one for writing, one for blogging, etc.

If there is someone you really admire, you can ask them to be your mentor. Just don't expect them to do it for free. Pay them! Time is money. Most successful people get bombarded with free mentoring request.

You also have to put yourself in their shoes and be able to answer what's in it for them.

There are additional ideas and posts in this WF thread ...



How to get any successful business owner to mentor you!


To your business success,


Steve

Direct communication, no fuss. This works well for me. Just be sincere and explain everything to him/her. I am sure that a well-written request can get anyone's attention

There are various ways to approach it. One of it would be contacting a coaching institute and ask them for the available teachers and professors who are taking students for mentorship. You can find several such coaching institutes and programs at Kiindly that also offers coupon deals and cash back rewards when you register through it. Cheers!

The only thing i can advice you regarding getting a mentor is to be sure he/she is just a couple of steps ahead of you. Someone that have been recently on your shoes and someone that in theory will have a lot more interest and time to give you a hand.
Most "gurus" that offer mentoring either have no clue what they´re talking about or don´t have the time to invested in you and if they do it won´t come cheap.

Best way is to connect on social media sites like FB , twitter. MAke a spread sheet , note all events that they are going through , see if they are facing any challenges etc and then later on ask if they are doing good? that will give you a great edge as gradually they will start remembering you , thats where you can hit a home run. Good luck..

If you do cpa marketing. You can find some cpa webboards ex. CPAhero, cpaelite,...


Someone will be your mentor but you need to be his/her referral.

Lots of people act as a mentor without needing anything in return. I'm doing that right now for a Croatian web designer. It's satisfying to see him do the work.

Which is really what matters in that relationship. I've had many people ask for help over the years, and most of them do nothing. Let that sink in. Only a few (this Croat included) have done the thing and come back with questions that they could only know to ask from having done the thing.

When they come back with questions and demonstrate they've done the work, then I'm super pleased to give them the next step.

You can indeed "just ask." I probably wouldn't phrase it as "will you be my mentor?" More like "Can you give me some guidance on solving this first problem?" and then GOING AND DOING WHAT THEY SAY. Even if you run into stumbling blocks you'll have feedback for them that shows you've done some work.

I talk with other people who act as mentors and that's the #1 frustration we all have: the person asking for help not acting on the help we give them. So...you want a good relationship and ongoing goodies dispensed...do the work.

you have to be willing to give something in return

Walking up to someone and asking them to mentor you is a terrible idea - you got that right.

You can try the method Charlie Hoehn used to work for Tim Ferriss: https://tim.blog/2011/03/10/12-lesso...e-4-hour-body/

As far as I'm concerned, it's a tried and true format.
You want to learn from someone more accomplished than you - you have to be willing to do a few things:

- Work for little or less (they get your talent, you get their knowledge - and to later on leverage their name)
- Offer them something they need (e.g., something that saves them money, makes them money, or saves them time)

Something to think about.

Some months into my job, I asked my boss to be my mentor. Of course, I had to prove my worth first before I asked hence the waiting time but was the best decision ever. Just straight up asked him.

You can also do the same and even if your aspiring mentor says no, then at least you tried.

If someone have capability to be your mentor than it is not so difficult to ask him/her. Your goal and ambitions will help you to choose your mentor. But you have to accept it now matter how bad is he/she.

Yes, I have a great mentor

It is very simple. Of you thing you can learn something from someone. He/she can help you to improve your skill. Just ask them to be your mentor and tell them you want to learn from them.

Simply stroll up to them, email them or anyway you can Contact them and just request them to coach you. Don't over think stuff you'll never know whether you don't attempt.

My mentor was my brother) you can find another mentor on forums, chats.

Search better for reviews

Whats wrong with that? Obviously you wouldn't phrase it in that way but whats wrong with being direct? Either they say no and you move on to another or they say yes.

Best of Luck

What about finding your mentor in YouTube? I mean, there are a lot professionals sharing their experience with tutorials and courses for free. You can drop comments in their videos and some even share their email for more direct contact.

Hello,

Mentors and mentorees have to build a relationship based upon "trust and mutual respect".

Firstly you [Mentoree] - have to clearly "state expectations" i.e. what you expect of mentoring relationship, what help you need, your goals , time etc. List these out. Mentors and Mentorees should discuss this and come to mutual agreement.

You could approach the mentor by talking to him in person or calling him when he is free, or you could write an email /text explaining what help you need and request if you could mutually discuss this.

Note - There are paid and free mentoring services but it depends on what you are looking at.

Most people are happy to Mentor, as is possible. However to answer your questions as-

If he [Mentor] asks - "Why should I?" - then You need to refer to your goals and state what exact help you need and why. Also state why he is someone you have approached [i.e why him] and how he can help.

If he [Mentor] asks - "What's in it for me?" - Most mentors are happy to share information and help (though may not have the time). So if this question asked - then here you may need identify and evaluate if there is something you can offer him in return for his time? (eg Money, or your time to help him in something, or something that will be beneficial to him?).

If mentor agrees its very important to identify exact goals, time , expectations, methods that you will build this relationship on.

If the person does not agree you can look at other people you admire who you already know, as friends, family members, business associates etc. Or get introduced to people who you don't personally but you look up to in your industry or anyone who could help you. Approach them as mentioned [call, email etc].

Experienced mentors can also be found through job boards, sites as linked in, quora and others.

All the best !

Hmm, Op disappearing right after posting this thread. Weird.


I've seen similar practices when someone posts from a dummy account to just answer the question and point to his service. Not saying it's the case here (hopefully) but the pattern looks very identical.

In my opinion finding and asking a mentor, who is going to be valuable for your progress, is almost one and the same - much more interrelated than you would imagine. Asking a mentor has to be preceded by finding someone, and that is a challenge.

Most often you're going to be paying for valuable advice in some way. But in order to assess if it's worth paying for, you need to find reviews, do your research and then take the plunge and hope this is going to be worth the time and dedication. At that point, you have no real idea if this mentor is really going to work for you. No mentor is going to do anything for you unless you're dedicated to following their advice. In my experience, they build on you as you build on them. They need to see action, interaction and progress. So asking a mentor is probably going to need you showing dedication first as you have studies them and feel confident you will follow their advice. Asking them to help you progress then becomes easier.

It is funny in life. Sometimes we just get caught in a Catch 22 Situation.

The person that could really have the biggest impact on our business we can not get past the gate keeper or afford.

But sometimes you can take the side entrance. As opposed to no entry at all.

If I am on a Webinar and the person has me all excited to pay $2000 for the Latest Greatest Must Have Product/Service that is a lesson in itself.

I realize I need to begin learning all I can on how to promote Webinars.

But some people really do need to be taken by the hand because it's a hell of alot more to it than "The Money is in the List" and " Just take Action".

You will be going in circles for months and years.

But you have to be creative. Become an affiliate and cheerleader for that person whom you respect. If you dedicate yourself to helping him or her make money how do you think they will respond if you ask for specific strategies and tactics that will benefit them as well?

Art

Once you've thought through your choice, you're ready to ask someone to mentor you. Here's how to do it.

1. Schedule an initial conversation
2. Clearly describe the guidance you're seeking
3. Confirm your willingness to do the necessary work and follow-through
4. Acknowledge and respect the individual's time