How do you handle failure?

Fail is a part of life. When you dont have fail in your life you don't know the real feeling of success.
When I fail then I motivate myself and keep doing hard.

Depending how important the 'failure' is...I usually just pick it up, dust it off, and start over.

If it's more than 'business' - if it affects me personally - I may go off in a corner and cuss and cry for a bit....and THEN I pick it up, dust it off and start over.

The objective is to move away from the failure as quickly as i can....there is no point in talking to others about failures endlessly or wallowing in defeat. Put it behind you or learn to live with it - and keep going.

You move ahead, you fall behind, or you are stagnant. Not a hard choice.

If we're talking about business, until and unless you fail, you're not an entrepreneur.

The secret to handling it is to reframe the terms of success. Failure is just a tag. It's up to us how much meaning and significance we attach to it.

Whether the failure is personal or business, I try to separate my thinking from the emotions (if any) to see what I learned or should've learned and what I may need to adjust for next time.

I don't believe in the "just keep going and you'll succeed" thinking because in many cases without adjustments, the keep going part is just wasted. For example, I can be working my tail off by digging holes in my back yard, sweating all day as I keep keeping on to reach my goal. But if my goal is to do something like put up a website or sell a book, the digging will never help me. (I realize this example may be seen as silly, but I've been guilty of similar behavior.) But by learning that something isn't working or didn't work and adjusting as needed, I might have a chance if I keep keeping on.

Mark

Failure is a temporary condition not a permanent attribute. Unless you agree to be a failure. And place the blame on you past or forces beyond your influence.

The roadmap to success most try to follow is a fairytale that no one ever succeeds with.

There are different failures in business.

Not getting that one deal? (very short term failure) To me, it's just part of the process. In fact, I deal with it the same way I deal with short term success. It's all part of the process.

I think about the daily failures, and not the successes. The successes just mean I didn't screw it up. The failures? I think about what I did wrong, or how I misread the intentions, or situation. But I'm talking about minutes, not weeks.

I've been like that all my adult life.

I've only had one business failure that cost me hundreds of thousands of dollars, and a year of my life. I bought into an idea that a fellow distributor had for a business model. My whole parent company bought into the idea. It seemed so certain of success.

Maybe 50 wealthy people changed their whole business structure. It took months before we really accepted that this thing was doomed to fail. We all lost substantial amounts of money.

It set back my retirement by a decade at least.

But I didn't blame the guy with the idea, or the company. The guy was intelligent, sincere, helpful. His intentions were honorable.

But this was about 30 years ago. I always knew it was my fault. My responsibility. But 30 years ago, I wasn't as knowledgeable as now. I didn't see that we were abandoning the very processes, systems, strategies that made us all wealthy in the first place.

I think today I would see these problems before they happened.

My business struggled and then crashed. The whole process took about a year. And then it took a year or more to build it back up.

But in the process of failing and then returning, I learned more about selling, human nature, employees, marketing...than I ever could have in a decade of study.

Half of fighting is knowing how to take a hard punch, and keep going.

Added later; The reason it took so long for us to abandon our failed business idea was that we had all dismantled our successful businesses, to built the infrastructure of a new business. It took months for us to complete that process. Then warning signs appeared, mostly no sales. But the guy with the idea (who had previously rebuilt his business the same way) assured us that we were just not implementing the right way, or we weren't advertising enough. In fact,, he had the most to lose, because he had the largest business, and we all went to see how his business worked. The location was great, the building looked great. The displays were great...and his business had customers all day. The problem (that we found out later) was that there was very little actual buying happening. And the buying that happened was small dollars.

But it was a new shiny object, and we were impressed.

I kept (like the others) our businesses going, even after we couldn't deny that we were all losing money. We were so invested already, we needed to make it pay...so we just kept at it.

It's been so long ago, I don't remember who said it first.....but at our annual company meeting, we found out that we were all losing money...quickly. The distributor who had the idea quit the company before then. No idea whatever happened to him.

One thing I learned that weekend with these other distributors (Most much wealthier than me). To a man (and woman) they took responsibility for their business. They didn't blame the company, or the guy with the idea. We spent the weekend discussing how we would rebuild our businesses, start over.

Almost no time was spent blaming others. Nobody said "Why me?" or "I don't deserve this". I was kind of proud of that group. Real entrepreneurs.

Fail forward.

Learn from the mistakes you made and keep pushing at it or move on to something new if it's time.

If it's something that you really want to do and you feel like it can still be done, don't let minor setbacks stop you. Keep pushing at it.

Failure is inevitable, it all depends on how you react to it. Gotta roll with the punches.

Some people like to fail at something every week. I'd like to be one of those people.

Even when you're working out, failure will eventually happen if you stay consistent.

It's just a way of life. Don't let it stop you because it can be a beautiful teacher.

Your response is dependent on what you do going forward.

I don't really look at certain situations as a failure.
Things don't always work out like I planned but
that's not necessarily a failure that I'm going to
blame myself about.

In business, if you are a serial entrepreneur that
is always coming up with new ideas, trying out
various strategies, new ways of making money
you read in a book, or some guru is doing it, or it
came to you in a dream, that's a chance you take
when you try something new. Sometimes things
work out and sometimes they do not, it's a part
of life.

I have developed several proprietary things that
work swimmingly, but then every once in awhile
a method that I thought would be fantastic is a
dud. Most times nobody even knows about it
but me so it makes no difference.

For example, I developed an online ad system
that is killer. And the beauty of it is that it's so
darn simple, it's like falling off a log. But as far
as I can tell, I'm the only one doing it. I've been
using that system for twenty years and it's
still working.

Anyway, whenever I have any type of setback,
I just drive on and try it a different way or do
something else until it works.

Just wondering.
What do you do if what you are doing isn't working?

What do you do when you try something and it fails?

How do you know if your attempt at something isn't working?

What are your parameters for calling what you did, a failure?

As we see from the post already, fail means something different to each of us.

Today, a participation trophy is given to everyone (at some events, schools, organizations) so failure was reframed and maybe a generation or so, doesn't even know what it means?

As for business, I found great relief and satisfaction when I worked for SCI (Ben Suarez) who had a billion dollars of PROOF, that only 1 in 7 attempts, even by the pros, would work. Which meant they failed 6 times or more before getting a winner.

But it only takes one winner, to make up for all the failed attempts.

GordonJ

P.S. Claude, your WF participation trophy is being assembled, and for only 19.95 you can have it custom engraved, OK? HA!

I don't cry over split milk when I fail. I realize I did something wrong. So, I re-strategize or try another thing.
I hope you bounce back.

So ... we sayin' spilt milk is a blessin'?


I guess it is a question of matchin' vessel to flooid.


Which kinda what gets whatevah where it's needed?

Failure is apart of life and i know that I am not immune to it .Yes failure is tought to embrace sometimes but what I learn from it is more important.

To me Failure is so important. It helps you grow and take a personal inventory of who you are and where you're at and where you need to be.

If everything was a Success in Life I honestly do not think people would be as Successful as they are.

Personally, failures have strengthened me and made me that much tougher and better.

It all goes back to the principle of no pain no gain, imho

We had an investment colomist in a well known paper, who loved those things, or he always said, "buy a index fund, throw it in your sock drawl, and when you retire you will be rich".

He also knocked individuals who made a lot on the Stockmarket, so naturally l only read his articles for a laugh.


But how do l handle failure, let's see, l tend to get over scammers but not liars, i see the irony in punishment for breaking rules that become all the rage, and know that the Stockmarket, especially the US one, is capitalism in its truest form, and it will tear your persona off of you, in no time at all.

Individuals who master it, become wealthy and individuals who don't lose everything.

The key thing about it, is you have to learn to manage your feelings, as, when you make a lot and lose a lot, you make it personal, but it is not emotional, or the Stockmarket doesn't give a s...t, whether you are investing your last cent or are rich, it only cares about, investors emotions, earning reports, P/E ratios, volume and such.

So when l lose, l have to try again, and learn from that, and when l lose often, it sucks, but l am learning more, so in the future l should lose less and earn more.

There is also failure in losses, especially big ones, but you get used to big investments over time, and tend to build on the gains you have made and keep, during the learning phase.

"It is not personal, it is business".

Wow ― some amazing advice and information in this thread. : ) A special "Thank You" to Mr. Whitacre for sharing his experience. My 2C would be something I said some time ago:

"The more you fail, the more you learn. And, the more you learn,
the more you succeed."

Thoughts?

Failure is such a strong word... or should I say many many people give it such a strong meaning.

If you look up the definition of the term... It kinda goes from failing to do X to say structural "Failure"

I think the connotation that most people associate to "Failure" is in line with Structural Failure. A collapse.. the end of, etc

You simply cant have "Success" without failure. Anyone that A/B tests uses failure to find success... An average test I run might have 20 30 test Failures before we fall into something that meets our expectations. But the question is are all of those steps failures.. or stepping stones to success?

Failure in my book, is quitting. and even with that I dont mean you did everything you could and it didnt work out, I mean you did something once and throw up your arms and say I will never get this to work, and quit.

An extreme example... you are at the store and some guy collapses and is having a heart attack. You try to revive the guy with mouth to mouth, but in the end he doesnt pull through ( A true life story on my part ) Is this a failure? is it my fault the guy didnt make it? I dont think so in the least, I did my part, and did the best to my ability. Im not going to say this experience haunts me, but I still to this day want to think I may have done something wrong.- or could have done something more. ( for the record I did keep him resuscitated til the Paramedics got there and he made it to the hospital but passed hours later )

So if that is not a failure what is? missing an appointment and not contacting the person you are meeting - I would say that is a fail.

Testing something and getting worse results? I dont call this a fail... a negative result is part of the process. BUT if you stop after that result and dont move forward... That is failure.

Ive had business dealings that fell apart, and even with this wouldnt consider it a failure. There are some instances where there might have been a variable that was missed or under calculated, and I guess those would be "Failures", but you cant succeed if you dont try... its the not trying part ( for me ) that is the failure, and NOT the it didnt work out part..

I could have been a millionaire if I.... is a failure. I spent 10K to make X work and tried everything I could but in the end the economics of the project didnt work out... wouldnt call this a failure.

If "Failure" is not doing something, then the opposite of failure would be persistently going through the motions towards success.. even tho in many cases those motions appear to be failures - but how could they be failures if the end result is success? stepping stones to a gaol, be it they are positive or negitive are still getting you towards the success at the end.

It's all learning, people don't talk about them much but the vast majority have had plenty of failures. What do they say, "You aren't truly great at something until you spend 2 years or 5,000 hours doing it"

No matter what it is, you just keep learning new ways to do it.

My key to forget failures is to always be working on 5 different projects. They may be just brewing in the background but they are written down to use in the future. You just jump on the next one. Nobody else cares, they got there own problems.

Scammers steal your money, liars make promises, they don't live up to.


(edit)

I see a lot of those sort of examples lately.

Unfortunately, they trip over their lies, with bigger lies, to the point of insanity, but not being self aware, they don't see any contradictions.

Not sure who said, "Fail early, fail often, fail forward". If you aren't failing you aren't challenging yourself, but its important not to repeat the same mistakes.

Has anyone here bought into bitcoin? Im in my 30s and dollar cost average into it every month, the rest is in an index fund thats mostly in stocks so I can ride out the peaks and valleys until retirement. Stocks will make a gradual reversal in my opinion since they're overvalued. but that's just cuz I read too much Zero Hedge

I count my losses, budget for next week/month, and try again.

if I don't have any broken bones, I take a cold shower and move on

Success stories cure me every time. It they did it I can too.
Then you deep dive into the how.

For example I saw a course that was a spectacular 50% off so that made it only a $1500 investment!

But I went to Google and searched his name plus "Interviews" and found at least 7 very in depth interviews of him explaining his strategies

Failures make me even more determined to find a way no matter what.

I am a stubborn Taurus it is blessing and a curse like most things.

Changing the direction a little. What happens and how people respond when failures or massive changes outside of their control or influence. Cause thing to break down and lead to failure or setback or complete ruin.

A lot of successful people go through such an event and it triggers something I am not exactly sure of .

For me, it divides into 2 sessions. At first, my mood goes down and I'm upset because of my failure. But then, I realize that it's just a part of my journey, and I go to sum up why I fail, what I learn from that failure and continue to learn to fix my mistake and improve myself.

Whatever the failure may be, I always tend to stew on it a little. Obsess about where it went wrong, how I could have saved it, how I could have avoided it.

I obsess and talk about it my husband (poor him). When I get tired of thinking about it, maybe in a couple of days, I tell myself that it was meant to happen.

Then I keep going.

This is a smart question.
I want to start saying that everyone fails, consequently it's fundamental to accept every personal failure to start dealing with it. Secondly, I think it's important to analyze the failure and the main reasons why you fail. And finally, consider what you learn from this failure and try to keep this lesson learned in mind.

so far 90% of my projects were failures, I have a special file on my PC where I keep them safe for later. When I have no new ideas I get back to them 1 by 1 and try again with different method. Everything is possible, we just need to find the right way. 10% of projects I managed to make it happen, came from the same folder

Claude
I guess in my experience the psychic vampires I have dealt. Have been people who felt they where just better than me . And enjoyed making themselves feel better. Dragging me back down any time I climes past them.

So I see it as some type of envy but I don't know the exact phrase for not wanting you to have better than they do or being angry others have what you can't get

Claude

I agree with the leaving part . It's also figuring out how to identify and drive of new ones that try and get close.

In my experience with successful people. When they in caritible mode they will halo how they can with daily need. But when you do start working to improve your situation. They will help how they can.

But then if I leave I am leaving to go somewhere I can eventually achieve much better in some way. And people notice. I'm not where I am because of where I have been. I am moving around to get a much better idea of where I want to go next.

Added later there are many people thoug who may not look successful. But the are not in the psychic vampire category. They just have many vampires orbiting them and are themselves naive to the drain on their potential.

Personally I think some are redeemable but they have to learn put the work in to building a productive skill or some skill that improves their lot in life

Great question -really. My mantra in life has been to ATTEMPT everything I think is worthy of my time and with this attitude comes an inherent risk for failure. I have failed at a couple of my projects - the first one hit me hard and it took a while for me to ACCEPT and move on from it. With age and experience, it got easier to embrace failure.

I have a habit of documenting everything I do - I have a Master Excel Workbook of EVERYTHING I do and did - including the details of my investment portfolio, the homes I buy, businesses I own. I have a tab in the workbook that says "Wrong Moves"- where I have documented at great length what I could have done differently.

For me, failure is an indication that I TRIED - but I also like to remember the learnings I got from the attempt. Hence, the documentation helps.

Starts with the view or the meaning we put behind it!

Did I fail or is this telling something else?

Ways to Manage Failure

• Recognise and accept your emotions. Failure hurts, at least in the first instance, and you need to accept that. ...
• Don't make it personal. ...
• Don't worry what anyone else will think. ...
• Take the right amount of responsibility. ...

Use failure as a way to improve.
My Uncle Alexander Zingman advice me about this topic.

Claude
This is horribly elitist and judgmental of me . But tell people who want something done about income inequality they should only get paid the same as the person who bags groceries at a grocery store.

And they become experts on why what they do means they get paid more money. But can not mentally process how people can be paid many times the rate they earn an hour

The only real group in the last 30 years seeingg there incomes increase have been the top ten percent of earners for partly because they have used technology to increase their value. Where technology has reduced the value of what many hourly workers labor. But that is my highly biased explanation

I will disagree with society determine the value of your labor. The people who pay you determin the value of what you do with complete disregard for what society would agree is the value.

Well, when I fail and if the failure is substantial, I take a few days off - watch movies, maybe go out with family or just sleep. I use a lot of music, it somehow heals me. Usually takes a week, and then I spend another week thinking what went wrong. Take up the next idea I had.


The thing is no matter what we do, there is always a risk we would fail and recognizing that right at the start helps.


I fail a lot though, many times and it happens again and again, until I eventually succeed.

Very difficult. Everything is shattered at failure, Hope, strengths, determination. At times you feel like quitting but you need to move on

Failure is a key of success. Failure is a temporary situation not a permanent attribute. Unless you agree to be a failure. And place the blame on you past or forces beyond your influence.

The roadmap to success most try to follow is a fairytale that no one ever succeeds with.

Of course there are lessons and reflection in fails.

I quit drinking lots of times.

But the heaviest moment was once I hit one of those milestone Birthdays and you evaluate where you actually are and where you had planned to be at that point.

There were times when I may have been forced to ask for help but to me it was like a Startup Round or Crowd Funding for something big and with lot's of profit potential.

But the people I asked may not have viewed it that way.

Always try to lead with what you can do for the other person even in crisis.

I see things a bit differently at different times. During and in retrospect.

These days there are just too many wins to count including just being alive to dwell on fails but most definitely focus on how to avoid them as best we can.

Failures make you more experienced. You should use them as stepping stones for Success.

Take it & learn from it!

Great question.

Until recently, I always tried to find the rhyme or reason, causation and effects of failure, humility, and what generally constitutes embarrassment.

Nearly a decade ago, I had wrote in one of my earlier journals; "humility is a wise teacher, once the embarrassment wears off!" - but even having scripted that statement myself, I don't think to have given much value to what it truly means.

Strange how failure or humility has a way of relighting itself or reigniting those fires later in life to take on more significant meaning. I find that true with good literature, music, and even in some of my own musings and writings over the years, whereas, I still struggle to see the value or benefit it may have on another or others.

With failure, I tread with causation, as most see your failures as a loss. Until people learn something from their failures and face whatever fears, insecurities, or humility that they themselves associate to those temporary losses or setbacks, they cannot help the fact; the universal inheritance often revisits us in our worst or darkest times.

I've started embracing my failures and my humilities to start overcoming my own insecurities and prior failures as milestones of sort. I ripped some epic level comedy for like 10 hours straight a few days ago, I consider satire a vent for knowledge that needs a means to be exhausted.

The only problem today is my JOKER is so embedded with allegory and embellishments of raw TRUTHS that the easily offended have me getting kicked off nearly all socialist media channels including having a 3 minute video flagged on TikTok for what they labeled "hate speech".

I wasn't ripping on confused genders, picking on any one culture, or intending to be anything more than comedic in nature, but if you mention sweat shops, Venezuela, or the owner of Nike in a joke, you can bet your ass... that video was a total train wreck failure, which in-turn has me perplexed as to "what can I say today without offending myself/ or another?"

So the 10's of hours of raw comedy video I did sit idle, as does my idea to get people's attention through comedy, satire, or attempts to mask the TRUTH as so many before me; George Carlin, John Belushi, Chevy Chase, et cetera were so wildly rewarded for their ability to just "let it go" and "let it rip".

Thus, if people think scars are the "end all" of the pain associated to those visible and deeper cutting life experiences, we are all failing to preserve the integral means to teach others that not everything that offends us is all bad... sometimes the offended need to recognize that failure is what set people in motion to provide solutions to those before they fail, as did we all... or in the least, teach them how to manage their failures rather than mask, hide, and run from what can only be defined as "Universal Truth" or the immutable facts; people will always be offended, the question is; what are they doing about it outside bitching about how offended they've become.

I find failure fascinating, most have closets full of failure and piles of it under their carpets, because nobody can truly handle the truth.

The truth can indeed set you free - but it can also get you killed, so rather than tap dance on landmines, we may need to revisit history, shore up the innocent, women, children, and elderly and let the WARRIORS take the frigging helm for once!

All the same, failure sucks initially, nobody likes failing, but cannot run from the truth, only you can determine the why, what, how, when, and where your next challenge will be met. If you carry too much of the dead weight, your journey will be a slow crawl through hell as I; myself have been known to do at times.

Now, I see that very influence in my beloved children who run from prior failures, rather than face the TRUTH as to why they failed!

Some things cannot be taught they need to be experienced!

Carpe diem!

Post enlightenment

I don't have an answer and where we live in a less smooth world with supply lines issues worker shortages. And things being crazy.

So much of what we do that worked but no longer work either go without or find alternatives. Failure much of the time is an event that happens between the right ear and the left ear. And steams from a false expectation of how things should work.

Zuckerberg is still upset the space x rocket carrying Facebooks satellite failed. Spaced reimbursed Facebook and went on building rockets and designed new one that fail an cost millions of dollars.


It more where are you willing to do things that don't work out and may fail and where do you play it safe

If you are out of shape and decide to do 100 push ups is the fact that you may be only able to do 5 at this point a failure. Or a starting point.

Accept the mistake that you made and keep a note of it to not to repeat it again.

I like the learning curve and even better if it is steep.

My 3-step system is very simple:

1) I intensely study the topic.

2) I attempt the task... but often fail.

3) I repeat the above process until I don't fail.

John

Failure is part of success. How to handle it? Sometimes it depends on your personality type. Some people are too emotional and give up easily, some just shrug it off and try again. Find your personality type and build on your strength in order to easily overcome failure. Those with high Fe (extroverted feeling) are going to appear the most emotional. Those with Fe in spot #1 are ENFJ and ESFJ. Those with Fe in spot #2 are INFJ and ISFJ. These four types will generally appear the most emotional.

Those with high Fi (introverted feeling) will not necessarily appear emotional, but will experience high emotion internally. Those with Fi in spot #1 are INFP and ISFP. Those with Fi in spot #2 are ENFP and ESFP. These four types will generally experience high emotion internally.

Least emotional:

Those with Fe in 3rd or 4th place in their functions will generally not appear emotional, but may on occasion. These include ISTP, ESTP, INTP, and ENTP.

Finally, those with Fi in 3rd or 4th place will keep their emotions more internal than any other types. These include INTJ, ENTJ, ISTJ, and ESTJ.

Failure has to be accepted and handled with grace , like the old cliche saying goes what can't kill you can only make you stronger dust it off and use it as the fuel to propel you to the next level !! 2022 is our year let's give it our all and don't look back .

Well be ambitious and this people never give up .Weak people give up soon and they complain with their sad life working all life in a 9to5 job .Ask yourself you want to live all your life like that ? If not stop complaining and get up and start again .Champions never give up

It's like a knockdown or KO.

You have to string the missing pieces back together.

Just don't blink and blast full steam ahead.

Failure is a great teacher and it's not cut for the glass jaw.

Swing like there's no tomorrow and live for the moment.

Each failure gets you closer to your goal.

It all boils down, how *teachable* you are - if you absorb information like a sponge and the whole enchilada.

I just don't EVER give up and try more!

Marian

I don't see it as failure, I see it as success.
Success in that I learnt not to do something.
For example, I recall experimenting with Safelist marketing and mailers.
It was something I knew would not work and I was right.
I lost a bit of time and a small bit of money, but it has taught me never to waste my time on all that again.
I never saw it as failure and was pleased I can rule it out now.

• I usually try to take the responsibility and not make excuses for the failure.
• What I learned from the experience.
• Talk about how I can use the experience to become better at your job and to avoid similar mistakes.

Fail as fast as you can... there is deep learning curve in there yet knowledge is power

He who possesses and applies the knowledge will have their desires met.

Failure is a part of every human life. No one can achieve without failure. The fact is people only seen him who successful but never seen his past which full of failure.

If you have ever had to face a painful failure, you probably know that it is not an easy experience to deal with. There are many reasons why you might feel that way. You may have failed in a job interview or a project. However, the reality is that every failure has a reason, and it is not personal. By learning how to handle it, you can take the necessary steps to avoid experiencing it in the future.

One of the ways to deal with failure is to understand that it is a natural part of life, but you have to make sure that you learn to deal with it. We will all face some types of failure in our lives, and we must learn how to cope with these different forms of challenges.

Failure can be a helpful tool in helping you grow. It is an opportunity to assess how well you are working and improve.

A failure can make you evaluate your professional skills and habits. It is a good lesson that will help you in the future. Taking advice from a therapist is a good idea since they can give you practical advice and suggestions on dealing with failure in the future. If you cannot handle a challenge, consider hiring a therapist. A therapist can help you handle failure constructively.

The key to handling failure is to make it an opportunity to improve your skills. Unlike when you're successful, you'll never know when a failure will happen. Instead, you should see it as an opportunity to improve. Your therapist will be able to offer helpful advice and suggestions on how to deal with failure in your career. If you have failed before, you can learn from the experience and avoid it in the future.

As we know that fail is the part of our life without fail we don't get success. Any one said he never get fail in any stage of life. he / she told wrong because human-being never get success without fail.
According to my view point we never foretaste in any stage of life and do your work with full potential toward your success. Because we only do hard work never made result of success so do hard work .

I always remember that Rome was not built in a day and that making mistakes = gaining experience = getting better.