Your favourite fake testimonial

14 years ago

My favorite fake testimonial is the one accompanied by a stock photo that other people recognize. Very, very stupid, and some big-name companies have been caught doing this.

Marcia Yudkin

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greenovni

14 years ago

I got a ton of favorites that I've seen around:

Diane says:
Oct 15, 2009 at 7:55 pm

I saw this on the news. How lucky is she to have found this opportunity!?!?!

Mikey says:
Oct 13, 2009 at 9:12 pm

Thanks for the info, just started this 3 weeks ago. I've gotten 2 checks for a total of $1900, pretty cooll.

Mary says:
Oct 09, 2009 at 1:33 pm

I think this is great and will come in really handy right now. I'm not the best computer user but I think I can post links!!!

Davis says:
Oct 08, 2009 at 9:16 pm

Just a quick notice about this thing. It does work but you have to be able to use a computer at least somewhat. If you can use email, etc. then you'll be fine.

Wanda says:
Sept 31, 2009 at 9:47 am

I just got my first check for $2800.00 from Google! How cool is that it took about 2 weeks for me to get the first check.

Then on the disclaimer at the bottom of the website:

Some individuals purchasing the program make little or NO MONEY AT ALL.

All from the "Google is hiring to work from home"

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Don Schenk

14 years ago

I remember a website in which the site owner was selling an IM couse that "would make you rich" if you followed it.

English was not his first language. The entire sales page was filled with incorrect sentence structure and wrong past/present tense in the verbs.

On his site were a half dozen or so testimonials from Americans, and each had a photo (stock photo) and a name that seemed to be from the US.

But each of the testimonials was written in the same poorly constucted English that was used to write the sales page.

:-Don

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CDarklock

14 years ago

Originally Posted by troy23

I've noticed testimonials from internet marketers all follow a similar pattern

It's code, just like in the real estate market. You know, the way "handyman special" means "nothing works" and "fixer-upper" means "in danger of condemnation" and that sort of thing?

See, people ask you to post a review, and they're your friends. You don't want to make them mad. So you use code words. You can't very well say "This product is such crap, I can't even bring myself to say anything good about the copy I got for free."

"You've really outdone yourself this time"

The product is of low quality. I mean, I thought your LAST product was bad, but sweet mother of crap in a hat this is garbage.

"I urge you to raise the price"

The product is overpriced. But hey, if you're going to overcharge, milk it for all you can!

"Once again you've over delivered"

The product is full of fluff. I've been shoveling through it all day and still haven't found anything meaningful.

You can say the same thing with slightly different words, and you actually mean it... but there's a certain quality to the turn of phrase that can throw up a big flashing neon sign to those who are paying attention, without alarming the demographic of "stupid people who will buy damn near anything."

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greenovni 14 years ago

Originally Posted by CDarklock

The product is of low quality. I mean, I thought your LAST product was bad, but sweet mother of crap in a hat this is garbage.

Thank you for a real Laughing out loud moment !!!!!!!
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Matt Fulger

14 years ago

Originally Posted by CDarklock

It's code, just like in the real estate market. You know, the way "handyman special" means "nothing works" and "fixer-upper" means "in danger of condemnation" and that sort of thing?

Ain't that the truth? I bought into one of those myself and 10 years later it's still a "handyman special" & a "fixer-upper". The value has consistently went down each year. Good for taxes anyway.

See, people ask you to post a review, and they're your friends. You don't want to make them mad. So you use code words. You can't very well say "This product is such crap, I can't even bring myself to say anything good about the copy I got for free."

I could bring myself to say that and actually have before.

The product is of low quality. I mean, I thought your LAST product was bad, but sweet mother of crap in a hat this is garbage.

ROFLMAO - man that's like most "new" products these days.

The product is overpriced. But hey, if you're going to overcharge, milk it for all you can!

HAHAHA - and many of them do.

The product is full of fluff. I've been shoveling through it all day and still haven't found anything meaningful.

That would be the vast majority of IM eBooks I've read.

You can say the same thing with slightly different words, and you actually mean it... but there's a certain quality to the turn of phrase that can throw up a big flashing neon sign to those who are paying attention, without alarming the demographic of "stupid people who will buy damn near anything."

Also, don't forget about the JV software that spews this type of **** for your JV partners to simply put their name on and call it good.

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CDarklock 14 years ago

Originally Posted by Matt Fulger

Also, don't forget about the JV software that spews this type of **** for your JV partners to simply put their name on and call it good.

Or, as I call it, "affidiot marketing."
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"The Golden Town is the Golden Town no longer. They have sold their pillars for brass and their temples for money, they have made coins out of their golden doors. It is become a dark town full of trouble, there is no ease in its streets, beauty has left it and the old songs are gone." - Lord Dunsany, The Messengers
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- Matt Fulger 14 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by CDarklock
  
  Or, as I call it, "affidiot marketing."
  
  ROFLMAO @ Affidiot Marketing. That's a good one!
  
  BTW, CDarklock anyone ever tell you that you look just like James Hetfield of Metallica? I swear whenever I see your pic, it takes me back to the 80s heavy metal days. Metallica rocked back then, not so much now though.
  
  Ok, I just had to get that off my chest. The resemblance is amazing.
  
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  CDarklock 14 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Matt Fulger
  
  BTW, CDarklock anyone ever tell you that you look just like James Hetfield of Metallica?
  
  I've been compared, at various times in my life, to:
  
  - Charles Manson
  - Mick Jagger
  - Steven Tyler
  - James Hetfield
  - Zakk Wylde
  
  Well, at least they're all musicians, even if one of them's better known for something else entirely.
  
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  "The Golden Town is the Golden Town no longer. They have sold their pillars for brass and their temples for money, they have made coins out of their golden doors. It is become a dark town full of trouble, there is no ease in its streets, beauty has left it and the old songs are gone." - Lord Dunsany, The Messengers
  
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troy23

14 years ago

CDarklock - excellent post that......hilarious

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Creative Thinker

14 years ago

As more people are getting used to such fake marketing, the only thing that will work well in the near future is video testimonials.

Oh damn, but he is not an "average" user according to FTC. In fact no one is!

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Allen Graves

14 years ago

"Who knew that natural breast enlargement could be so easy?!"
- Steven

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Every day I check the obituaries. If I don't see my name there, then I know it's going to be a good day!

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ktmurf 14 years ago

Originally Posted by Allen Graves

"Who knew that natural breast enlargement could be so easy?!"
- Steven

That one has me crackin' up!

I'm not one to make fun of someone from another ethnicity, but the people who it's obvious that english isn't their first language who mangle the heck out of stuff repeatedly and have no idea that they're doing it. Well....those people crack me up too. As wrong as it is, I know.

I use to work with a guy at a dept. store and he had apparently spent his earlier years in America with some pretty vulgar people because he would let fly some pretty good zingers in situations you don't generally sling a zinger. I.E. A customer would ask where to find a particular item. "make a left at the bikes, okay mf'r?!" Shew, good times.
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greenovni

14 years ago

Here is a good one, not a testimonial but a website that claims:

http://www.1internetuniversity.com/

"Easily Create Credibility & Expert Status In Any Market By Running Your Own Internet University!"

Then by the payment button for the course it says

Link the above image button to your payment link and then delete this pink text. Be sure you send your customers to the "thanksIU.html" page for their download after their sale is completed

Our super internet guru forgot to remove the above statement from his $7 template

right under that are the testimonials that state:

Shawn Pleen of Ocala, Florida says:
I really can't believe how easy you've made it to create fame and credibility in any market. I used your techniques to setup 3 Internet Universities in markets I had no experience in and now I'm the "go to" expert in each market! Thanks for this great opportunity!

and

Billy Henderson of Santa Monica, CA, says:
I figured I would give your Internet University idea a shot and setup a site in a market I've been interested in for years which was actually very easy to do. The results? I'm banking $4300 in recurring, monthly income from my new venture!

The funny thing is that they buy buttons don't work and he already got testimonials!!!

LMAO @ it's twin sister site http://www.internetuniversity.topzed.com/ which is signed at the bottom with

Sincerely,
Your Name Here

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greenovni

14 years ago

Place Your Customers Testimonial Here-

Customers Name - Sherwood, Oregon

Courtesy of our friends at Membership Site Mngr

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greenovni

14 years ago

Here is another beauty!

Whose testimonials include this line in bright pink:

"This testimonial is for example purposes only please add your own customers testimonial and remove this line."

From our friends at Blog Link Generator!

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psresearch 14 years ago

My favorite is:

""I am making $500-$600 a day and I don't even get out of bed till noon! Data Money Online, I want to marry you!" which uses a nice photo from iStockPhoto for the testimonial giver. :-)
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chimpanzee

Banned 14 years ago

[DELETED]

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bravo75 14 years ago

my favorite

Originally Posted by chimpanzee

I saw a testimonial recently that had one guy requesting a refund... LOL
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bravo75

14 years ago

CDarklock: funniest person on this forum

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mywebwork

14 years ago

Well if a picture is worth 1000 words (but if you order in the next 10 minutes I'll throw in another 1000 words for free - just pay separate shipping & handling) then Jeff Paul's entire "Shortcut to Internet Millions" infomercial is 30 minutes of fake testimonials, complete with cheerleaders!

My favorite part is after Jeff explains that these millions will be deposited directly into your bank account he shows as "proof" a member who testifies he earned over 80k on 3 separate occasions. As his "proof" he shows 3 checks (what happened to direct-deposit?), each for over 80k and all hand written! Amazing how in the Internet age big corporations still write those $100,000.00 checks by hand!

Bill