Do you thank people for their time?

50 replies
Hey Warriors,

I just went to an amazing conference this weekend and one thing I noticed in all the small conversations I was in is that a lot of people get a lot of cool info from people when they ask a question of someone who has experience in the area they are struggling in...and yet don't say thanks for the "solution" they were looking for?

Do you notice this or is it just me?

Cheers,

Brad
#people #time
  • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
    Some do and some don't. I was brought up to always say Thank You and that has stuck with me. It's just good manners. However, I do appreciate the fact that some get overloaded by the answer and wander off in a daze - thus not even realizing the never said Thank You.
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  • I think they should be thankful. Just put yourself in that position. Obviously I would also expect a thank.
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  • Profile picture of the author imagene
    Originally Posted by Brad Spencer View Post

    Hey Warriors,

    I just went to an amazing conference this weekend and one thing I noticed in all the small conversations I was in is that a lot of people get a lot of cool info from people when they ask a question of someone who has experience in the area they are struggling in...and yet don't say thanks for the "solution" they were looking for?

    Do you notice this or is it just me?

    Cheers,

    Brad
    Rude, rude, rude!! Bad karma for them I say.. but maybe as Kevin said, they might have an overwhelming sense of info overload and in their moment of daze forget to say thank you.. even still...RUDE!
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  • Profile picture of the author Colin Palfrey
    I think this is because some people just don't understand the basic concept that information has value.

    I always thank people when they tell me something new, or they at least try to help.

    This isn't necessarily because I'm a nice guy, though, just that I realize I am being given something of value, and the other guy may not.
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  • Profile picture of the author Gary King
    Agreed with Kevin, some are just lost in absorbing the info.

    Many, sadly are just not very grateful or are at least terrible at expressing it.

    Say an extra thank you to make up for them!

    Here, I'll start...

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

    Have a great day.

    Gary
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    • Profile picture of the author polrbearz
      I think I may be sensing a nice convergence in thinking --among more aware people at least---that may be leading toward a resurgence in good manners in the online world. A lot of posts I've been reading talk about what STANDS OUT in an environment where information overload and endless cloning and "repurposing" rules the day. What STANDS OUT may more and more be a sense of personal connection. A ready example woud be fellow WF'er Darla Valentine's recent work on how to be a welcome guest blogger. Taking the time to really get to know the blog and its owner--and giving acknowledgment---underlies her strategy. You probably know plenty of other examples of how the personal touch is really working for people who are willing and able to apply it.

      Good manners can't be faked. I find this "Darwinian" environment -- where the survivors may flourish because of their consideration and warmth--an encouraging scenario. And like other posters on this thread---I feel ready because I, too, was raised with these values.
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      • Profile picture of the author AnitaCross
        Yes, I do.

        I know I'm busy, with more to do than time to do it in. So I always appreciate the time others give me. And I tell them as much.

        Besides being the good manners my mom drilled into me when I was a kid, showing your appreciation leads others to share more information next time. And you never know when that tidbit of information will turn out to be pure gold.

        So keep sharing, and keep thanking.

        Thank you,
        -Anita
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Mayo
    I never say thanks!

    OK, I may have a few times. But only when someone was helpful, funny, witty, spot on, critical, compassionet, caring, loving, thoughtful...

    OK, I'm a little weird that way.

    Thanks,
    Have a Great Day!
    Michael
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  • Profile picture of the author grannywriteswell
    I was bought up to say "thank you" and like Anita I do believe my time is valuable so I take the time to thank people for sharing their thoughts with me. But I notice I still have to remind my adult children to say "thank you" for anything at all, so is saying thanks just an old fashioned manners thing that doesn't have any value anymore?

    BTW I always love it when people remember to thank me for something - it really makes my day, so even if people don't do it very often around me, I would still say it because I know it makes me feel good

    So yes, thanks for giving me something to think about
    Ellen
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  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Santos
    I always thank somebody for their time, particularly if I've personally sought them out for anything. If the situation is substantial enough, I'll whip out the calligraphy pens and write out a thank-you note for delivery.
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Mayo
    Brad Spencer, Kevin Riley, FreshDomains, jugroo, imagene,
    Colin Palfrey, Gary King, polrbearz, AnitaCross Grannywriteswell
    and Daniel Santos, Thank you all for being grateful and thanking others
    when you feel it is deserved!

    John Taylor always says, Test, Test, Test.
    Thought I would test and see for myself.

    Have a Great Day!
    Michael

    PS, Nearly forgot, Thanks John!
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  • Profile picture of the author Giftys
    I too was brought up to be considerate and thankful but I also got it from hanging around mature, classy people.

    I've noticed over the last number of years how some people never take the time to say thank you or please. It's really disappointing. I see them in the stores. They'll be at the register. Won't say one word to the guy (Ok, maybe they're having a bad day) but when the cashier goes to give them a receipt, no thank you at all. Very inconsiderate and just down right rude.
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  • Profile picture of the author pethanks
    I always thank people of their lives. That is the only thing I can give to them. You can do it also.
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    • Profile picture of the author Alan Ashwood
      Originally Posted by Brad Spencer View Post

      Hey Warriors,

      I just went to an amazing conference this weekend and one thing I noticed in all the small conversations I was in is that a lot of people get a lot of cool info from people when they ask a question of someone who has experience in the area they are struggling in...and yet don't say thanks for the "solution" they were looking for?
      Do you notice this or is it just me?
      Cheers, Brad
      As a father of three children it's one of my jobs to teach them to appreciate things, and people. If they don't say thanks, for even small kndnesses, they get picked up on it. (and dropped from a great height :p)

      Originally Posted by pethanks View Post

      I always thank people of their lives. That is the only thing I can give to them. You can do it also.
      I noticed you have 702 posts to your credit, BUT NOT ONE THANKS. Does it hurt to hit the Thanks button, or have you never learned anything useful in the Forum? This totally contracdicts what youhave written above.

      A good starting place is here in the Forum. I see many Warriors (like pethanks above),who have huge post counts, but very low, or non existent Thanks counts. I feel that, if they can't be bothered to simply click the Thanks button for others, then they're not participating in the spirit of the Forum. very often, I don't respond to requests for help from these character.

      There was another thread recently, specifically about this subject in relation to the Warrior Forum, this is the link http://www.warriorforum.com/main-int...-love-you.html if you're interested.

      Cheers

      Alan

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      Time for a cuppa.
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  • Profile picture of the author hanandaner
    yes,, definetly... the effort they take to solve our question and give away their valuable suggestions definetly deserve a thanks... i would surely do that
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  • Profile picture of the author Chri5123
    Interesting post Brad,

    I have been brought up to say please and Thank you and if someone helps me out will always be grateful and let them know.

    Maybe sometimes I am TOO polite!

    However I think some people have a problem with saying Thank you - how many people have you held a door open for and they just walk through without a word, or flashed someone at a junction in your car to let them out when it is busy and not even a wave?

    I wish these kinds of people the best of luck in life as they will need it!

    Chris
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  • Profile picture of the author Sheila Dunfrey
    I noticed that too Brad. As if it is hard for them to say "thank you" after they get what they want. It is just a way of returning back what we get. Me, i see to it that i say thank you to someone who did nice to me.
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  • Profile picture of the author SamirRastogi
    Sometimes, even a friendly smile can convey thanks
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  • Profile picture of the author rrm
    What I especially cannot stand is when someone expresses no thanks when you buy something. This is especially so on ebay. Maybe it's an antiquated idea, but I sorta kinda thought that when you buy something from somebody, that somebody was supposed to at least fake some kind of appreciation for you parting with your hard earned money, a la "Thanks for buying my stuff."

    Today, it's different. Sellers, many of them, will leave you no feedback until you leave them positive feedback first. I'm thinking... well, ok, I just bought YOUR product. SO... what am I supposed to be thanking you for? Being there to have the product I needed? It's all bass ackwards now.

    Seems to me that if I am a seller, I just might make it a little harder for a buyer to want to leave bad feedback if I first express a big "Thanks!" for buying my stuff. :confused:

    Ron
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    • Profile picture of the author cashtree
      Originally Posted by rrm View Post

      What I especially cannot stand is when someone expresses no thanks when you buy something. This is especially so on ebay. Maybe it's an antiquated idea, but I sorta kinda thought that when you buy something from somebody, that somebody was supposed to at least fake some kind of appreciation for you parting with your hard earned money, a la "Thanks for buying my stuff."

      Today, it's different. Sellers, many of them, will leave you no feedback until you leave them positive feedback first. I'm thinking... well, ok, I just bought YOUR product. SO... what am I supposed to be thanking you for? Being there to have the product I needed? It's all bass ackwards now.

      Seems to me that if I am a seller, I just might make it a little harder for a buyer to want to leave bad feedback if I first express a big "Thanks!" for buying my stuff. :confused:

      Ron
      I think it's a fair trade off, goods for $$, no thank you is required, although personally I try and always be kind to people/companies and thank them. This is how positive relations are built, not only does it increase the chances you'll get discounts or similar(or give them) but the positivity can trickle down in the future into more positivity. I had a BNC host who I had to cancel my account with because I couldn't afford it give me over a year of free hosting, in an upgraded account, all because I sent them an email from the heart telling them I appreciated their service, and because they were kind people. Unfortunately they went out of business recently, at least that part of their business but i'm sure their success will continue in the future.

      "IMer's are in the market of being nice to people" cashtree

      that's what we do, and any marketer who doesn't do that, I can't say strongly enough to you "you're doing it wrong."
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      • Profile picture of the author rrm
        Originally Posted by cashtree View Post

        I think it's a fair trade off, goods for $$, no thank you is required, although personally I try and always be kind to people/companies and thank them. This is how positive relations are built...
        Good point. I guess my gripe is that it gets to be more like a game of chicken. Who will blink first? The other party won't thank you unless you thank them first. If you are the buyer, you thank them first. If you are the seller, you thank them first. Good graces and manners sometimes seem to have gone the way of the handshake and the dodo bird.

        Not to give too much importance to who reacts how and when. If I sell, it is enough to offer the best I have with the best service I can. I don't expect anyone to thank me for selling it. The trust and faith in my product is reward enough. If I buy, I don't really expect to be thanked for doing business.

        I certainly would not expect the cashier at Walmart to bow down and shake my hand after I swipe my credit card. It's hard enough to get many of them to actually speak. On the other hand, if you pitch me and I buy, ignoring me or expecting me to act like you just did me a favor probably won't do much for relationship building.

        Ron
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  • Profile picture of the author moonzombie
    Absolutely, if somebody is providing me with valuable information I always try to acknowledge them, at the very least for their time. If nothing else, they will hopefully feel good about themselves, and likely be more open to provide assistance in the future as well.

    As rrm mentioned, a growing trend seems to be holding feedback hostage. As the buyer, once I have paid promptly for the item, I have more-or-less held up my end of the bargain, so shouldn't that be enough to leave positive feedback? Alas, there are a lot of very difficult buyers and I can understand why some sellers do this, they have to keep something in their back pocket in case they feel the buyer leaves them unfair feedback.
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  • Profile picture of the author pennington33
    Yes i thank people who help me in any kind of way. I think its the right thing to do.
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  • Profile picture of the author J Cohen
    I pointed this post out to my father who said there was a time when you wouldn't have needed to have this conversation as it was the natural thing to do.

    Thank you all for reading

    Jay
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  • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
    I probably say thank you (or thanks) more than any other single phrase. I even sign off my newsletters with a thank you:

    Thank you for your time today.
    Until we meet again...
    ...have a great now until then!

    On the other hand, I'm sure there have been many times where I should have said thanks and didn't because my mind was elsewhere, or I was in a hurry and focused inward instead of outward . . . whatever, so I can't get too upset most of the time if someone fails to say thank you.
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  • Profile picture of the author Clint Butler
    I have actually noticed this as well. In my business its all about promoting myself versus my business and I try to help a lot of people with things that I know a lot about.

    So I take the time to answer their questions, or provide them the resource they need to solve their problem. But I hardly receive a thank you from that particular person. I do however receive them from other people who are indirectly helped as a result of the interaction.

    So regardless of whether the original person is appreciative or not, there are others that are.

    Regards,
    Clint Butler
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  • Profile picture of the author ChrisAlta
    It's common courtesy to say please and thank you. Some people are just rude but I'm assuming this also depends on how you were raised.

    Again in business you do learn professional manners, and if these people are asking a lot of questions and asking for help then they may just be starting off and aren't really thinking about saying thank you but instead of focusing on the answer you're giving them.

    Know what I mean chile bean?!
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  • Profile picture of the author InfinetADs
    I always try to thank someone for their time, ESPECIALLY when the took time to thoroughly explain something to me, show me something or help me. It is rude to think one is entitled to someone helping them. Being very friendly and just saying thank you is enough though. One does not have to make a big deal of it.
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  • Profile picture of the author johndetlefs
    A quick thank you doesn't hurt... and doesn't cost much time. This may sound like crap but my fiancee reckons that's one of the reasons that she went out with me, because I treat waiters and shop attendants like they're real people.

    Doesn't occur to me to act any other way... It just seems right. If someone takes the time to give you some info (being dazed with information overload aside) why wouldn't you thank them? Seems a fantastic way to not only be rude, but also ensure you don't get any help from that person in the future!
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    • Profile picture of the author myob
      When people thank you for thanking them for their time, do you thank them again? Where does it stop? :confused:
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      • Profile picture of the author J Cohen
        Originally Posted by myob View Post

        When people thank you for thanking them for their time, do you thank them again? Where does it stop? :confused:
        I am not sure friend

        Thank You

        Jay
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        • Profile picture of the author myob
          Originally Posted by J Cohen View Post

          Thank You
          Thank you.
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  • Profile picture of the author Meharis
    Originally Posted by Brad Spencer View Post

    Hey Warriors,

    I just went to an amazing conference this weekend and one thing I noticed in all the small conversations I was in is that a lot of people get a lot of cool info from people when they ask a question of someone who has experience in the area they are struggling in...and yet don't say thanks for the "solution" they were looking for?

    Do you notice this or is it just me?

    Cheers,

    Brad

    No. It's not just you. Here's couple aswers of what I do if I'm asked:
    Do you know the time?
    Do you know where such a such street is?

    My answer: Yes and I keep walking...
    "If I don't receive a thank you for the "solution they were looking for?"
    My answer: You're Welcome!
    Meharis
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  • Profile picture of the author addison.agnote
    I thank people whenever I get information from them because I believe that time is equal to money. The time they've spent for you is so valuable plus they also shared information that may contribute to your skills.
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  • Profile picture of the author ritchierich
    "Thank You". Base for all my marketing and its just good to be kind
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    • Profile picture of the author Alan Ashwood
      I already wrote a long, and I believe contributory post on this thread, but some useful person decided to report it as 'self advertising', which it wasn't, and regrettably a mod removed it.

      I'm so sorry to the rest of you.

      AND THANKS VERY MUCH TO THE NETHERLANDS (SENIOR) WARRIOR! :rolleyes:

      I didn't have an opportunity to state my case before it was removed either.

      Ticked off Warrior
      Alan

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      Time for a cuppa.
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  • Profile picture of the author vampire3x
    of course, i'm appreciating for their time
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  • Profile picture of the author Jeff Lenney
    Banned
    Personally, I go out of my way to let somebody know I appreciate what they have Done for me or even for a group. so yes. I definitely thank peoPle for their time and help
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  • Profile picture of the author gta18
    Saying thank you is always a good thing to do.
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  • Profile picture of the author magiclouie
    A million thanks for this thread.

    I normally don't state it as "thanks for this" or "thank you for this".., but I am used of saying, I can't thank you enough for this ...,,

    Cheers,
    Louie Tugas
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    • Profile picture of the author John Coutts
      I live in Spain where people don't tend to say "thanks" very much. It isn't so much that they are ungrateful; it's more a cultural thing, I think.

      I was in a local bar one time with two Spanish friends, and when the barman came with our drinks, I was the only one who said "thanks".

      The barman asked the other two why they couldn't say it as well, but they shrugged and said it wasn't something they did.

      A few moments later, when the other two were looking elsewhere, the barman nudged me. I turned around to the bar to see him pouring me another large drink. Then he said quietly, "that's for saying thanks!"

      It pays to say "thanks" sometimes.

      John.
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      • Profile picture of the author Christines Dream
        I'm with Kevin on this one. It's definitely how you were raised. And sometimes people get overwhelmed or they are just too busy.

        I like to think that way because thinking that people are rude just leaves me upset and angry. I think you really have to have the right mindset when you don't receive "thanks" -- and not let it bother you.

        ..Christine
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  • Profile picture of the author jascoken
    Well... I just thanked you for raising the issue!

    My parents always used to say "manners cost nothing". In a world gone slightly mad, a few more polite and caring comments wouldn't go amiss!
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    • Profile picture of the author marciayudkin
      I have been brought up to say please and Thank you and if someone helps me out will always be grateful and let them know.

      Maybe sometimes I am TOO polite!
      Please don't come to that conclusion!

      Politeness makes a difference in the world. I notice it particularly when I travel to the American South, where so many more people say "Yes, ma'am" and "Yes, sir." It relaxes you if you are not used to it where you come from.

      In my professional experience, I have noticed that perfect strangers who send me detailed email questions without a proper or personal salutation or even using my name are usually the ones who do not say "thank you" when I have answered their question. It's as if they feel entitled to answers and therefore do not feel any gratitude.

      It feels like they are treating me as an answer machine or a service they have the right to expect instead of as a person.

      Because of this observation, I now almost never answer strangers' questions by email (or PM) that come in that impersonal, peremptory tone. I just hit the delete button.

      Marcia Yudkin
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  • Profile picture of the author buckeyes09
    I tend to say "thank you" pretty liberally as I believe it's better to say it when not really warranted than forget to say it entirely and offend the person.
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  • Profile picture of the author marcuslim
    One way to say thank you is to buy their info product lol. Really what people are doing for you is taking the time to do the research for you, saving you time. Is $7 worth 5 hours of research about something you really want to know? I think so!
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  • Profile picture of the author PaulyC
    I was always raised to show appreciation... I don't buy that you're in an 'information daze'. If I give you a long-winded explanation and I don't get a measly 'thank you', you can bet that I won't go out of my way again...

    On the other hand, thank me sincerely once and I'll probably go to the end of the earth to make sure you get exactly what you're searching for.

    Just my strong opinion
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