Instant Failure --A Step-By-Step Guide

...I know...amazing, right?

But I'm not the only one who's perfected this 100% failure-
guaranteed method. I AM, though, the first person to put
his cojones on the line, and GIVE this information to you
FOR FREE (+opt-in)

The execution is simple -- Just follow this single step:

1. Do Nothing

But...

What if you're not prepared? What if you're a serial
go-getter? Or a prolific writer?

Help is at hand. I've mapped out a foolproof path for you.

It's easy to fail once you follow these simple steps (I've
never revealed them in public before, so don't dilute this
wisdom by uploading to warez or torrent sites...please!)

1. MENTALITY

I constantly hear the "gurus" banging on about mentality...
abundance mentality, scarcity mentality, entitlement mentaliy...
as if they're BAD things. They're rich, you're not. Right? Screw 'em
and their self-serving mentality smugness.

2. PLANNING/RESEAECH

Pass.

3. TAKING ACTION

Now...this gets my gander up. Why would I write a bunch of
non-sensical articles when I could sit here bitching instead? I mean, duh?

"Action" is failure's nemesis. It could literally and inadvertantly lead
to success (uuuggh). We DON'T want that.

4. CONCLUSION

Don't believe the hype. This stuff needs careful planning, research
and hard work. 4/10...but if you buy the "professional failure teleseminar"
through my hoplink, I'll send you something to which I attribute a huge value,
but in all reality is worthless.

And they said sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.

..oh, and did someone call me "lame"?