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Why I Won't Send You A PM..

by John Taylor
19 replies
I received a PM today from someone who was,
and I quote "pissed off" because I not only
reported a rule breaking thread, but I also posted
a note in the thread that I had reported it
together with the reason why.

I was told that I could have "sent a gentle PM".

The reason I post in threads is very simple..
it's there for all to see, it's about educating
people about what's acceptable and what isn't.

It also encourages other people to report threads
which go against the rules and it gets them
deleted more quickly.



John
#send
  • Profile picture of the author tommygadget
    Oh, I see. I thought you weren't PM'ing me because you don't like me. Whew, that was a relief

    TomG. - I am UNAFRAID to use the report post button, BTW.
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    • Profile picture of the author Tom Church
      lol, PM's are a great way to establish relationships and find people with similar ways of thinking.

      Networking to the max.
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  • Profile picture of the author Glenn Grundberg
    Good GOD, John, what's next?

    Putting Them In Stocks? Public Lashings?? Anthill Stakings?!?

    LOL, Just Kidding.

    I agree with you 100% - If it's all kept behind the scenes, there's no real deterrent. At least under the old system the Mods had the opportunity to leave a wormy post up for a while with an acerbic comment attached for all to see...

    I seem to remember reading several of yours and more by Mike Tracey, and YES...

    They WERE deterrents!

    I know I never wanted to see my name "Up In Lights" like that

    Keep It Up, Pops! :p
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    I'm Baaaaaack...
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  • Profile picture of the author Mike McBride
    Well said, John.

    There is a related reason as well, at least for me. I have sent many "gentle PM's" to new members who have broken one or more forum rules (usually affiliate sigs or blatantly soliciting work in the main forum,) and have in quite a few cases have either been ignored or received a very nasty PM reply, or both.

    All too often, folks, all you see is what's on the public board, not what goes on behind the scenes.

    Is it really so onerous to read and respect the rules of the forum?
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  • Profile picture of the author mmurtha
    Lol John!

    Good going.

    I wish we had more people that did this kind of stuff.

    There are those that are faint hearted when it comes to dissing people in public. They don't mind spamming up the forum, but they mind when you name it in public. Makes you wonder doesn't it?
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    • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
      John, I always thought it was because you couldn't spell my name.

      J/K.

      Excellent post and valid reasons.

      Oh, and NOBODY can spell my name.
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      • Profile picture of the author Mike McBride
        Originally Posted by Steven Wagenheim View Post


        Oh, and NOBODY can spell my name.
        Steven, I'm a proud winner of numerous spelling bees in grade school - your name is a piece of cake!
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      • Profile picture of the author tomw
        Originally Posted by Steven Wagenheim View Post

        Oh, and NOBODY can spell my name.
        If that's the case, your marketing ain't working, buddy.



        Thomas
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        Help Us Rescue, Rehabilitate And Reunite Victims With Their Families
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        PROTECT the trafficked and PROSECUTE the traffickers.
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    Steven Wagenheim do you mean we have spelt it wrong all this time.
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    • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
      Originally Posted by Bev Clement View Post

      Steven Wagenheim do you mean we have spelt it wrong all this time.
      His real name is "Dumbass" (said in a jovial style of banter)

      Swagen, Waggers, Waggies, just dont measure up eh?

      John
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      John's Internet Marketing News, Views & Reviews: John Taylor Online
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      • Profile picture of the author Lance K
        Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

        His real name is "Dumbass" (said in a jovial style of banter)

        Swagen, Waggers, Waggies, just dont measure up eh?

        John

        Reminds me of the TV commercial where the guy is interviewing for a job. The interviewers name is Mr. Dumass and the interviewee calls him Mr. Dumbass.
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        "You can have everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want."
        ~ Zig Ziglar
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      • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
        Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

        His real name is "Dumbass" (said in a jovial style of banter)

        Swagen, Waggers, Waggies, just dont measure up eh?

        John
        Actually, Dumbass is my middle name taken from my mother's side of the
        family that came from Poland. (I'm part Polish, so I'm allowed)

        Bet you didn't know that did you?

        Sure does explain a lot

        PS - Before all you politically correct folks start attacking me, it's a joke.
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  • Profile picture of the author Steve Peters Benn
    Darn right John. I read that thread and reported it as well. You do the right thing to state the error where everyone can see. That was blatant violation.
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  • Profile picture of the author Steve Peters Benn
    Steven. I am shocked and appalled.

    You have Americanised your middle name - how can you drop the accents!
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    • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
      Originally Posted by Steve Peters View Post

      Steven. I am shocked and appalled.

      You have Americanised your middle name - how can you drop the accents!
      Because I didn't know how to spell it with the accents.

      Heck, I still have to look up my last name whenever I sign it to my articles.
      That's 5 seconds of my life each day, per article, that I'll never get back.

      Sincerely,

      Steven "Dumbass" Wagenheim

      There goes another 5 seconds shot to hell.
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  • Profile picture of the author KathyK
    Spelling I can handle - the pronounciation might be a different matter!
    Signature

    Cheers,
    Kathy

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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Ambrose
    Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

    I received a PM today from someone who was,
    and I quote "pissed off" because I not only
    reported a rule breaking thread, but I also posted
    a note in the thread that I had reported it
    together with the reason why.

    I was told that I could have "sent a gentle PM".

    The reason I post in threads is very simple..
    it's there for all to see, it's about educating
    people about what's acceptable and what isn't.

    It also encourages other people to report threads
    which go against the rules and it gets them
    deleted more quickly.



    John
    To be honest, I have to agree and disagree with you here John.

    I feel it's courteous to contct the poster first as it could be an honest mistake. I know the rules are there to be read, however it just avoids any ill feeling towards people.

    If they dont get the thread removed.. then you could make a post on the thread.

    But each to their own I suppose.
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    • Profile picture of the author Mike McBride
      Originally Posted by mm365 View Post

      To be honest, I have to agree and disagree with you here John.

      I feel it's courteous to contct the poster first as it could be an honest mistake. I know the rules are there to be read, however it just avoids any ill feeling towards people.

      If they dont get the thread removed.. then you could make a post on the thread.

      But each to their own I suppose.
      There is a softball field in my neighborhood; my nieces play in the league there.

      On the left side of the gate to the field is a sign, "No Smoking."

      On the right side of the gate is a sign, "No Dogs Allowed."

      Do you know how many times people come wandering in with a dog, or light up a smoke? Plenty.

      And can you imagine the (rude, ignorant, combative) reactions from said people when someone mentions the rule (and in these cases, laws - they are city ordinances) they are breaking?

      I just don't understand the mindset of people who come to this or any forum and don't bother to read the rules, especially when there is a thread labeled " Warrior Forum Rules - Please Read First!"

      As I posted earlier, I've tried the "courteous" route, and been met with some pretty crude responses. And for goodness sake, infractions expire and deleted threads aren't fatal.

      If someone is so thin-skinned that getting an infraction or having a thread deleted for an "honest" mistake, then they don't belong in a public forum, and probably don't belong in business either.

      It's common courtesy at the very least, and in many cases just plain good business to do so.
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    • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
      Originally Posted by mm365 View Post

      If they dont get the thread removed.. then you could make a post on the thread.
      The vBulletin forum platform as it is currently configured
      does not permit the thread starter to delete the thread.

      Threads are deleted when enough people use the report
      function or by an Administrator.

      As Mike says, it's not unusual to get an abusive response
      to a PM. In my opinion, the benefits of keeping it open
      and transparent far outweigh any minor disadvantages.

      John
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      John's Internet Marketing News, Views & Reviews: John Taylor Online
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      • Profile picture of the author Martin Luxton
        As John said, it's all about education and establishing boundaries.

        If somebody blatantly breaks a rule and the thread doesn't get reported, it stays there until Allen or a Super Mod finds it.

        This means that some people would get the impression that what they are seeing is permissable and do the same thing themselves.

        Yes, you can send a PM, but how much backing and forthing would there be before a resolution is reached? Meanwhile the thread is still there giving people the wrong impression.

        On top of that, why should John spend a couple of hours of HIS day PMing errant posters just to keep them sweet?

        He has a business to run and it's not his job to mollycoddle oversensitive people.


        Martin
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        • Profile picture of the author Tom B
          Banned
          I laugh every time I see a THREAD REPORTED. lol

          Seriously John, those have been some of your best posts.
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