Difficult time? What a JOKE!

by patfl
39 replies
Recently, I have seen so many posts blaming the economy or whatnot that I feel like I could share some of my past experiences to maybe help some people in this forum to put things in perspective...

If I hurt some people with this message, sorry, but I don't care much.

Not because I don't have compassion but because I have seen so many nasty things while I was traveling that I feel like a provocation when someone talks about deep depression when the only risk he has is to loose a bit of comfort.

The crisis we're experiencing in the US is not worse than in some other countries. We loose our homes?

In some countries, they're starving to death.

See Cuba, 100 miles from the floridian coast... No money, no food, nothing. Every month, I have to send food to my wife's family, at $20 USD per pounds sent because some politics thought it's a good idea to isolate communists countries...

There are millions of examples all over the world.

Our pain here is nothing to compare. We still eat. We don't STARVE.

Now a bit of personal history.

I came in the US 5 years ago, I was 31 at that time, with my wife and my older son. He was 9 months old when I touched ground in Miami, Florida. While I'm French, my wife is Cuban so the process to get the work permit is somewhat simpler... somewhat only.

All the money I had when I arrived was $3000 USD. No family, no friends and a 9 month old kid to feed. Oh, and I forgot the best, our English was so weak that it was of no help at all to find a job.

That's why we choose Miami actually, because of the Latin community and we thought it would be easier for my wife, for my wife only because I didn't speak Spanish either at that time.

After a week here, we already spent $1500 USD, half the money we had for a bed, some clothes, food and a tiny-infested-with-coakroches apartment(they call it efficiencies here) in Hialeah, for those who know that area.

Long story short, my wife managed to find a job in a cafeteria (paid on tips only) and we managed to not be thrown in the street. It took us 2 months before being able to buy simple furnitures like a table where to eat... 2 months during which we were eating on the floor. And I don't even complain, we were EATING and happy and proud of ourselves because our kid never missed a meal.

Tell me about crisis...

Being in a foreign country with a family, no money, no right to work legally (it took a year and half before we finally received our work permit)...

Crisis are in our heads, nowhere else.

And my story is a little joke when I talk to some other people... Like that guy, a friend of mine who was hostage in colombia. Some members of his family has been killed before his eyes. He finally managed to escape and came to the US. Illegal immigrant they called him... Fact is that guy will never complain about any crisis, for him, it's like a paradise here. And he made it, he has his own business, bought his home, pay his bills on time and if he doesn't feel good in the morning sometimes, he just carry on and thanks all his saints for his blood flooding in his veins and for the opportunity he had to reconstruct his whole life in the best country in the world, this country where, wherever you come from and whatever you did in the past, you can make your life better.

Crisis?

Forget the crisis, forget the economy, forget the news, forget your job even and stuck to that simple and animal truth, save your ass because nobody will do it for you.

Thanks for reading, and if I hurt some people, it's not the intention.

Patrice
#difficult #time
  • Profile picture of the author Buildingfutures
    Wow.

    That really puts things in perspective for me. Thank the Gods for the life I've had, even with the rough patches, its certainly better than most alternatives.
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    • Profile picture of the author ExRat
      Hi Patrice,

      save your ass because nobody will do it for you
      That is such good advice.

      I don't want to sound negative or over-dramatic, but the truth is that if you give many people a chance, they will also hand our asses to us on a plate.

      But some of the reasons why this isn't negative -

      a) it would be a pretty dull, meaningless existence if we never had to really try, and hence, grow. We would never be forced to learn the real lessons of life - our nature would lead us to 'not bother'

      b) it has always been this way - it's evolution's way of selecting and evolving - which means that the 'current' generation is the product of the finest of the finest humans ever to have lived

      c) many of the most joyous moments in life come from struggle - EG - the combination of more than one person to achieve a goal - even if that goal is just survival or successful reproduction

      It's sad that so many are conditioned to believe that wealth is the answer to life's important challenges, and the key to a fulfilling life - survival money is important, but going beyond that to wealth, is not much different.

      But whether we are rich or poor, we are a lot more likely to find fulfillment and happiness by -

      1) seeing and understanding the world around us as clearly as possible - in particular, appreciating any gifts we have been given

      2) finding a productive, constructive and meaningful place within it

      I think that one of the healthiest things we can do is to regularly ground ourselves by examining the reality of the day to day existence, and battle for survival, of a large percentage of the world's population.

      If we don't appreciate what we have currently (whatever it is), we might be tempting 'life' to teach us a humbling lesson which forces us to become more grounded - for our own good, and continued survival. So I try to keep myself grounded by my own efforts, in order to avoid tempting 'fate'.

      I agree with your sentiments. And I also understand that it is the typical human condition to become accustomed to a certain level of circumstances, and to (at first) feel like the 'world has ended' when these circumstances suddenly drop down a peg or two.

      Perhaps our 'mission' in life is to find our own way to fight these type of natural tendencies, so that we become better humans. That way, we are not going against the forces of evolution, and are creating a worthwhile reason for our existence, and the continuation of it. No living thing has a guarantee of continuation. And every other living thing apart from humans, evolves to offer something positive and worthwhile to justify it's existence.

      As a whole, humans act as if we are exempt from this 'rule'.

      Good post Patrice. You are obviously well 'grounded'.
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      • Profile picture of the author Tom B
        Banned
        Patrice, my wife is from Ukraine and knows a few people that came here with very little and made some pretty damn good lives. One being a millionaire all from working as a taxi driver.


        I think a lot of Americans whom grown up here forget what can be accomplished in this country. I truly believe one of the things that makes America so great is that anyone can accomplish what they set out to do.

        They just need to work hard and be smart.

        I see a lot of people such as yourself doing just that while people that have been born here complain they don't have this or that.
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        • Profile picture of the author patfl
          Originally Posted by Thomas Belknap View Post

          Patrice, my wife is from Ukraine and knows a few people that came here with very little and made some pretty damn good lives. One being a millionaire all from working as a taxi driver.


          I think a lot of Americans whom grown up here forget what can be accomplished in this country. I truly believe one of the things that makes America so great is that anyone can accomplish what they set out to do.

          They just need to work hard and be smart.

          I see a lot of people such as yourself doing just that while people that have been born here complain they don't have this or that.
          Indeed Thomas, and it seems that more gifted they are, more they complain.

          Well, I guess it will last until it gets really nasty, after that they won't have no choice, it'll be fight or die.

          Patrice
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      • Profile picture of the author Michael Silvester
        Hi Mate,

        I really appreciate this post and congratulations
        on taking charge of your life! I take my hat off
        to you.

        Take Care,

        Michael Silvester
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      • Profile picture of the author patfl
        Originally Posted by ExRat View Post

        Hi Patrice,

        That is such good advice.

        I don't want to sound negative or over-dramatic, but the truth is that if you give many people a chance, they will also hand our asses to us on a plate.

        But some of the reasons why this isn't negative -

        a) it would be a pretty dull, meaningless existence if we never had to really try, and hence, grow. We would never be forced to learn the real lessons of life - our nature would lead us to 'not bother'

        b) it has always been this way - it's evolution's way of selecting and evolving - which means that the 'current' generation is the product of the finest of the finest humans ever to have lived

        c) many of the most joyous moments in life come from struggle - EG - the combination of more than one person to achieve a goal - even if that goal is just survival or successful reproduction

        It's sad that so many are conditioned to believe that wealth is the answer to life's important challenges, and the key to a fulfilling life - survival money is important, but going beyond that to wealth, is not much different.

        But whether we are rich or poor, we are a lot more likely to find fulfillment and happiness by -

        1) seeing and understanding the world around us as clearly as possible - in particular, appreciating any gifts we have been given

        2) finding a productive, constructive and meaningful place within it

        I think that one of the healthiest things we can do is to regularly ground ourselves by examining the reality of the day to day existence, and battle for survival, of a large percentage of the world's population.

        If we don't appreciate what we have currently (whatever it is), we might be tempting 'life' to teach us a humbling lesson which forces us to become more grounded - for our own good, and continued survival. So I try to keep myself grounded by my own efforts, in order to avoid tempting 'fate'.

        I agree with your sentiments. And I also understand that it is the typical human condition to become accustomed to a certain level of circumstances, and to (at first) feel like the 'world has ended' when these circumstances suddenly drop down a peg or two.

        Perhaps our 'mission' in life is to find our own way to fight these type of natural tendencies, so that we become better humans. That way, we are not going against the forces of evolution, and are creating a worthwhile reason for our existence, and the continuation of it. No living thing has a guarantee of continuation. And every other living thing apart from humans, evolves to offer something positive and worthwhile to justify it's existence.

        As a whole, humans act as if we are exempt from this 'rule'.

        Good post Patrice. You are obviously well 'grounded'.
        Your post talks a lot to me, through your words, I guess some pretty good battles here too

        That is our health!

        Patrice
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  • Profile picture of the author gcjmarkets
    Thank you for your post and I can relate although I was born in America and my problems were of my own making. I know how it feels to hit rock bottom, and then pull yourself out.

    Thanks Merry christmas
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  • Profile picture of the author Raydal
    Although I could identify with your situation because mine was worst as an immigrant with four children and couldn't work for 7 years, evicted from
    apartment 5 times during those years ... BUT crisis by American standards
    is different to a crisis by third world standards.

    A crisis for my kids is if they cannot eat cornflakes for breakfast and I have
    to make some oatmeal porridge; when I was their age oatmeal was a welcomed change from dry bread and tea.

    So it is an "American crisis" but not an immigrant or third world kind of crisis.

    And to be poor in America is as challenging, if not more, than a lot of other
    places. If I had no money in my country of birth I could find fruits to eat
    and could sleep outside during the night. My first eviction was in New York
    city and during winter with two young babies and two college degrees!

    -Ray L.,
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    • Profile picture of the author patfl
      Originally Posted by Raydal View Post

      Although I could identify with your situation because mine was worst as an immigrant with four children and couldn't work for 7 years, evicted from
      apartment 5 times during those years ... BUT crisis by American standards
      is different to a crisis by third world standards.

      A crisis for my kids is if they cannot eat cornflakes for breakfast and I have
      to make some oatmeal porridge; when I was their age oatmeal was a welcomed change from dry bread and tea.

      So it is an "American crisis" but not an immigrant or third world kind of crisis.

      And to be poor in America is as challenging, if not more, than a lot of other
      places. If I had no money in my country of birth I could find fruits to eat
      and could sleep outside during the night. My first eviction was in New York
      city and during winter with two young babies and two college degrees!

      -Ray L.,
      You're absolutely right, I have seen some neighborhood here in the US where poverty could be compared to some of the poorest third world countries... and cold weather kills faster than starvation, I totally agree.

      Now on the other hand, there are so many things to do before asking for charity in this country that I don't understand why people who have been raised here, speaking the language, having families here, sometimes prefer to complain and ask for gifts before than fight for themselves.

      Life is real tough for some of us here, immigrant or not, but our duty should be to fight for our survival first and then go ask for help as a last resort.

      Thanks for sharing your experience Ray, I'm always fascinated by story of people who at some points felt "the breath of the dragon" and who managed to escape alive and kicking.

      Patrice
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      • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
        Originally Posted by techymarketer View Post

        You're absolutely right, I have seen some neighborhood here in the US where poverty could be compared to some of the poorest third world countries... and cold weather kills faster than starvation, I totally agree.

        Now on the other hand, there are so many things to do before asking for charity in this country that I don't understand why people who have been raised here, speaking the language, having families here, sometimes prefer to complain and ask for gifts before than fight for themselves.

        Life is real tough for some of us here, immigrant or not, but our duty should be to fight for our survival first and then go ask for help as a last resort.

        Thanks for sharing your experience Ray, I'm always fascinated by story of people who at some points felt "the breath of the dragon" and who managed to escape alive and kicking.

        Patrice
        Patrice, first off, thanks for sharing your story.

        A lot of people raised here are taught to complain and ask for gifts because they have something very valuable to a set of Americans - the right to vote.

        Every American citizen has the right to vote on reaching the ripe old age of 18, unless barred by a court (convicted felons, mostly). Those votes have value to the politicos who will do anything to keep their jobs. So they pander to the lowest common denominator.

        They tell these people that they are victims, that they, too, deserve whatever the evil wealthy have. And if elected, they'll make sure "The People" get their fair share. It's evolved to the point that, in some communities, getting your own welfare check is a rite of passage.

        While there are certainly heartbreaking pockets of poverty in the US, most of what passes for 'poor' is a joke. Families with multiple cars, TV sets, cell phones, video games. My wife is a cashier at Walmart, and every day she sees people paying cash for hamburger and using food stamps for lobster and prime rib.

        Even fairly well-off communities are teaching their kids to beg for what they want, rather than working for it. Back in the day, if we wanted uniforms for a sports team or money for a group trip, we washed cars, painted fences, gathered newspapers, mowed lawns, whatever. Now Soccer Mom parks her behind in a lawn chair with the latest bodice-ripper while Little Darling stands at the entrance to the grocery store with a tip jar begging for donations.

        I wish more people had your grit and determination. Hell, I wish I had more of it. But it's been a long time since I've been backed into that kind of corner, and I truly hope it never happens again...

        Thanks again for sharing your story...
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  • Profile picture of the author ExRat
    Hi Patrice,

    Your post talks a lot to me, through your words, I guess some pretty good battles here too

    That is our health!
    Yes. And our strength.

    Once - I feared and avoided challenges and tests, now I seek them. A most healthy addiction. But the key (for me) is to first understand which direction is required (and why) - second, to maintain that course. The mistake is to be led. Reason? What you said -

    save your ass because nobody will do it for you
    Decide where you're heading and why, learn to navigate, steer your ship and fight those who try to grab the wheel from you - they're after your 'ass'.

    Hi Raydal,

    BUT crisis by American standards is different to a crisis by third world standards.
    Agreed. And the third world is constantly in crisis.

    And to be poor in America is as challenging, if not more, than a lot of other places. If I had no money in my country of birth I could find fruits to eat and could sleep outside during the night.
    You make a great point. The concrete world is particularly unforgiving. We don't have the time as we're too busy saving our asses.
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  • Profile picture of the author tjk1058
    Patrice,

    Great for you and your family... I keep telling my wife and boy to stop complaining about the things they don't have and focus and the things they do have!

    Keep it in perspective and you can see that most of us here have a way better life then a lot of people who are suffering around the world.

    TedK
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  • Profile picture of the author Alex Sol
    Interesting post...

    Thinking how my father was a teacher at the aviation University in Ukraine, paid $50/month - and our rent for a one bedroom apartment and a family of 4 was $100 per month... Or my uncle, a general doctor being paid a similar salary... and people do not complain.

    People here (North America) complain so much because they have seen the "good life".

    I heard some of my American friends talk about being so poor, they had to eat "Brad with Butter" for 2 days!!! Dude, you know how Ukrainians would be happy to be able to afford butter??? Do you know how in many other countries people will kill for a slice of bread?

    ... I think the problem is human mentality. People need problems, they can't live without them. My neighbor complains because he's got this small 42" TV while his brother has a 60" TV - OMG What a Drama! The more people have - the more problems they will create/imagine so they could complain about something... and I understand it. That's just the way the society raises its people.

    This is one of the reason we moved to Montreal, Canada. No French, No English, No Friends, No Money... and we did not complain. Because this is the best we have ever seen and we are grateful for this opportunity that only a few people get.

    Just my $0.02
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  • Profile picture of the author MeysterR
    Patrice,

    Thank you so much for that heart wrenching story. My prayers are with you and your family, whether you need them or not; (although from the sound of it you're pretty much well on your way.)

    I'm having a little trouble with this concept though:

    Quote:
    save your ass because nobody will do it for you

    How exactly do you apply that?

    You see, I was laid off about a month ago, and I'm fairly financially secure for another 5-6 months or so (being a grad student helps), and I've been dividing my time lately 60% job search/ 40% online ventures.

    What does "save your own ass" mean exactly? Nobody is hiring in my city; and I'm cemented to this town until I finish my MBA (I have to finish it, too far in now to just stop)

    Does it mean, "Don't work for other people because you're supposed to look out for yourself?" Companies can, after all, just reorganize and send you packing, all because you entrusted your fate to someone else, hoping they would "save your ass".

    Does it mean, "work only, solely on your own business ventures"? A warrior here advised me to only look for a job now, and said something to the effect of, "running a successful business under these circumstances is slim and zero, and slim just left town."

    I'd love to save my own ass, if I knew exactly what that meant...

    I'd greatly appreciate any clarification you could provide.

    -Rob
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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      Patrice may have a better answer - but to me "save your ass" means you do WHATEVER you have to do to survive. You go wherever you must, you stop school if you absolutely have to - you do what must be done to take care you and yours.

      People here (North America) complain so much because they have seen the "good life".
      That's a good point and you'll find it in other parts of the world, too. If you have a good life or easy life - you begin to believe that's what you "deserve". Once you buy into that fiction, any small thing that challenges your easy life is seen as unfair and/or undeserved.
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      • Profile picture of the author patfl
        Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

        Patrice may have a better answer - but to me "save your ass" means you do WHATEVER you have to do to survive. You go wherever you must, you stop school if you absolutely have to - you do what must be done to take care you and yours.



        That's a good point and you'll find it in other parts of the world, too. If you have a good life or easy life - you begin to believe that's what you "deserve". Once you buy into that fiction, any small thing that challenges your easy life is seen as unfair and/or undeserved.
        That's very true, and I even have seen this happening to some people who had a pretty tough life... It seems that comfort will always get the best of us at the end.
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  • Profile picture of the author patfl
    Hi Rob,

    By "save your ass", I mean do whatever it takes to change that bad situation. Like an animal would do if it was trapped and in danger for example, it would fight.

    In order to do that, just stop to think too much and just act, with your instinct, your will and your "weapons", your strengths.

    While you will feel secure, you'll continue to think while what you need is to fight.

    Feel the danger and nothing will stop you
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  • Profile picture of the author Flyingpig7
    Hi Patrice,

    Thankyou for sharing this with us it puts the current world credit crunch crisis into perspective, I could'nt agree more. I am lead to believe that some Americans think they are the only ones suffering that is not so. I am not anti US lots of great things come out of America. (Warrior Forum!! great idea love it).

    Cheers
    Keren
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  • Profile picture of the author Sagar Mehta
    Thanks for this inspiring, and might I add myth-busting, post.

    I've always felt that it's important to realize that wherever you are, there are OTHERS less fortunate, less lucky, less 'provided-for', less comforted and less many other things than we are.

    Things we take for granted are 'big dreams' for a major part of the world's population.

    Every time I see a child begging in the streets here, with torn clothes and no shoes on his feet, I find it almost impossible to turn them away. My friends 'shoo' them away like anything - I for one can't get myself to do it.

    Just the thought that what you think is the worse situation for yourself is 'such a great time' for someone else is eye-opening. Yes, our sympathy for the poor doesn't help the poor BUT it at least let's you see the world in a way where you can be thankful for whatever you have - no matter how deprived you think you are.

    Sagar
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  • Profile picture of the author tommygadget
    So many things in life are a matter of perspective. My father-in-law came to the US over 55 years ago with a dime in his pocket. He made a success of himself with blood sweat and raw determination. I look at myself and my kids and know that we don't have the same raw grit that he had. Hardships either make you strong or destroy you.

    TomG.
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    • Profile picture of the author absbica
      Originally Posted by tommygadget View Post

      So many things in life are a matter of perspective. My father-in-law came to the US over 55 years ago with a dime in his pocket. He made a success of himself with blood sweat and raw determination. I look at myself and my kids and know that we don't have the same raw grit that he had. Hardships either make you strong or destroy you.

      TomG.
      On the flip side...your father didn't have the technology and such we have today.

      Our parents worked hard in their time to provide their children the best. The idea was "I want to work hard so my kids don't have to".

      I think for MANY people who come from Baby Boomers...this seems to be the case. I consider myself an extremely hard worker so maybe I am the exception...but my father worked extremely hard and does well for himself...but I see some peers of mine whose parents worked extremely hard...and they are lazier then hell. Sad really.
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      • Profile picture of the author Charles E. White
        Forget the crisis, forget the economy, forget the news, forget your job even and stuck to that simple and animal truth, save your ass because nobody will do it for you.
        Somebody did it for you...an American Vet!

        Actually, it was a very good post and true. People who have never been out of this country don't realize how good we have it here even in the times we have now. Good Post!
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        • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
          @jimrpips: Dude, quit candy coating things and tell us what you really think...:p

          Originally Posted by absbica View Post

          On the flip side...your father didn't have the technology and such we have today.

          Our parents worked hard in their time to provide their children the best. The idea was "I want to work hard so my kids don't have to".

          I think for MANY people who come from Baby Boomers...this seems to be the case. I consider myself an extremely hard worker so maybe I am the exception...but my father worked extremely hard and does well for himself...but I see some peers of mine whose parents worked extremely hard...and they are lazier then hell. Sad really.
          One of the biggest success lessons I ever got was from my father's father. He told me, "if you take someone's dollar for something, always make sure he gets more than a dollar's worth of work. Do that, and you'll always come out fine..."
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      • Profile picture of the author ptone
        Originally Posted by absbica View Post

        I think for MANY people who come from Baby Boomers...this seems to be the case. I consider myself an extremely hard worker so maybe I am the exception...but my father worked extremely hard and does well for himself...but I see some peers of mine whose parents worked extremely hard...and they are lazier then hell. Sad really.
        The reason this is so is because many of the baby boomers you refer to did no want their children to have to go through the same hardships they endured. So, they created an easy life for their children and this is the result. Rightly or wrongly, this is the case.

        To the bigger picture of this discussion, it pains me to read the comments regarding the "first-world" country citizens, but I cannot disagree. At the risk of getting in trouble for this comment, this is how we have been conditioned by our government (I'm speaking for the U.S. specifically) for over 50 years. Just look at the recent election, can you count the number of things we have been promised that the government will provide for us? How many times have you heard over the past year how bad of a condition our country is in? Its all OK...the government will save our asses so we won't have to - right?

        The following video speaks volumes:
        http://www.youtube.com/v/P36x8rTb3jI&hl=en&fs=1
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  • Profile picture of the author david-forer
    sometimes we all need a slap across the head so that we realize how good of a life we have. Thanks for making me reflect on the things in my life that I take for granted and now appreciate a little more.
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  • Profile picture of the author KatieWilliams
    Thanks for having the guts to post this. You are so right.

    Funny actually, I was having a conversation yesterday about how prevalent depression is over here (England, although I guess the statistics are similar for the US) when the majority of people really have no idea what struggle is. I can't help wondering, in third world countries, how many people have the luxury of being 'depressed' and how many are too busy trying to survive each day?

    The idea of a crisis in England is worlds away from what a crisis is to someone in a third world country. Having a black and white TV would be the end of the world to a lot of people over here... we have no idea how blessed we are!

    This is why I ALWAYS operate in gratitude. It's fine to plan what extra things or experiences you want, but don't ever take for granted what you already have.

    Katie
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    • Profile picture of the author digimix
      That is exactly why I still live here in Jamaica. Even though the econ is bad and crime is rising, I can never go hungry here. I mean there is always a way to eat, in some areas people will pick fruits from their trees and offer it to you if you are in a bad state. The people here are really generous. It never gets cold. As last resort there is always fishing, or even hustling (go down town and sell things on the street). I know one guy who sells grilled fish on the roadside and sells over US$500 worth nightly in only a few short hours. It is all how you look at life.
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  • Profile picture of the author Charles Butler
    Originally Posted by techymarketer View Post


    Thanks for reading, and if I hurt some people, it's not the intention.

    Patrice
    You should never apologize or sugarcoat how you feel. For the people who got offended by your amazing story; in my experiences, those are the ones that are in, and rationalize their situation. The truth hurts. Period. Excellent post btw!
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    “First, say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.” -Epictetus

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  • Profile picture of the author Matt Bard
    I don't believe you can measure a person's pain or suffering.

    To say that the poor and hungry children in the Appalachian Mountains are not as deserving of our sympathy because they happen to be in one of the wealthiest countries in the world is absurd.

    I think the real question should be are you a fighter or a victim.

    The world is not going to change for you but you can change your world.
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    • Profile picture of the author jimrpips
      Banned
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      • Profile picture of the author Bryan Toder
        In my hypnosis business, it started to "slow down" for a bit in November (around election time). But, I decided to take action and instead of looking for a reason... I changed some things in my marketing and attitude...

        and now...

        ... business is booming.

        Attract success and it will come.
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        ~ Bryan

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      • Profile picture of the author Matt Bard
        Originally Posted by jimrpips View Post

        Plus, hungry kids in Appalachia don't have people shooting at them, they are not being sold into sexual slavery by their parents for the price of a bowl of rice, and they don't have to worry about catching any number of disgusting fatal diseases running rampant through their starving villages.
        Because a kid is hungry in America scr*w em huh. This is why Madonna and other celebrities travel to Africa to find orphans.

        The orphans here are not suffering enough.
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    • Profile picture of the author absbica
      Originally Posted by Matthew Maiden View Post

      I don't believe you can measure a person's pain or suffering.

      To say that the poor and hungry children in the Appalachian Mountains are not as deserving of our sympathy because they happen to be in one of the wealthiest countries in the world is absurd.

      I think the real question should be are you a fighter or a victim.

      The world is not going to change for you but you can change your world.
      At the same time...you have morons like Paris Hilton who's only fame is her last name, yet people throw money at her for what...being an bimbo?

      People like her are what help make our country so laughable, because you can be a bumbling idiot in our country and have the life of your dreams, or you can get shot at in another country, eat food off the floor...and you get a chance to hug your parent after being separated for years...and that makes you have the life of your dreams.

      Our "gauge" of success in America is what differentiates us from others in the world. Maybe that is what makes us the most powerful country on the planet...or maybe it makes us a giant joke with the typical old timer, pot belly millionaire who drives a porche and boinks hookers. I am generalizing here...but you get my point.

      A good day for some in America is whether they get their Filet cooked properly or whether their fur coat in Orange County fits good. For other people, a good day is not dying.

      I really wish there were lot more humble people on this planet.
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  • Profile picture of the author absbica
    Great post and yes it puts it all into perspective.

    The problem with people in general though is everything is a comparison. My situation is worse then this persons, who is worse off then that person, etc...

    There is ALWAYS someone who has it better or worse. That is life, deal with it. Save your own ass..like you said. Nobody is going to hand you money. If someone does something for you out of the goodness of their heart...that is great...but don't take advantage. Pay it forward.

    On a side note..for someone who has been in the country for 5 years with no english skills...you have come a long way bud. I would have never suspected the way your post was written. We have people who have lived here for 40 years who can't write half as well as you just did.
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  • Profile picture of the author T.R. McCarroll
    See your story is no different from my family when they came to the US in the 1870's ... in fact they invented the world of "slums" in New York .. when the signs said "NO IRISH " ... no money and with a 3rd grade education at best ... worked their ass off and through the generation instilled in the next how important it is to work hard and give back some ... the US gives more f'n money to the world population than all others combined ... period ... thanks for the post and welcome to America
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    • Profile picture of the author absbica
      Originally Posted by WestCoastSandMan View Post

      See your story is no different from my family when they came to the US in the 1870's ... in fact they invented the world of "slums" in New York .. when the signs said "NO IRISH " ... no money and with a 3rd grade education at best ... worked their ass off and through the generation instilled in the next how important it is to work hard and give back some ... the US gives more f'n money to the world population than all others combined ... period ... thanks for the post and welcome to America
      Not sure if that last sentence was sincere or sarcastic.

      However, just because we give more money to the world then other countries combined does not mean the OP's post isn't on the mark.

      With that logic..it is all fine and dandy the bank CEO's, Fannie and Freddie, etc... made out like bandits with a crap ton of money and others were left jobless...because they gave "more" to charity then anyone else combined. Yea, that logic makes perfect sense.
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  • Profile picture of the author Bean77
    Amen- we all need to sit back and smell the roses!! Good post!!
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