Do you have anything POSITIVE to report?

42 replies
I hope you will forgive me if I ramble for a minute.

In the middle of September we received a phone call telling us that the house that we had been leasing for 3 1/2 years was no longer going to available, and we were being forced to move.

After Scott had heart surgery in June the doctor had told me that it would be good for him to be in a less stressful environment. So when we had to move we moved to a nice small town in a new state.

We got completely moved in mid- October and I spent the rest of the month unpacking.

The first part of November Scott's maternal grandmother suffered a massive stroke and we made the 5 hour trip to be with her. She passed away on November 11th. Between the hospital stay and the funeral we were there almost 2 weeks.

30 days later on December 11th Scott's paternal grandmother passed away and we made the 5 hour trip again to be there for the funeral. We ended up getting iced in while we were there, and had to stay for almost a week.

The recession has been hitting us hard anyway so the past few months have been tough.

For the first time ever our kids have no presents under the tree, and for the first time ever we will not be going home to spend Christmas with my family.

I think if one more person tells me Merry Christmas I might have a meltdown! I am stressed and maybe a little depressed.

I see Jenn Dize trying to help someone save their house(I just saw this and will see what I have) and a few days ago I saw Dr.Mani trying to help someone save a business that had been running for 10 years. I see the same thing here. People are in bad shape!

Marketers like us who used to be able to make a living are losing everything they have.

Yesterday we received an email from a big name marketer who was trying to raise money to pay his tax bill. I had another pm today from a marketer that you would all know, who has lost his business and is now homeless.

Every time you turn on the news or read the paper, all you see is death and destruction, banks failing, people losing their houses, and screaming recession.

People come to the forum and say "I give up" nothing is working.

But with Scott being sick and kids counting on me, giving up is not an option for me.

So right now I could use a little bit of positive! We are all normal people living normal lives.

Tell me a positive story from your everyday life. I don't care if you found your lost dog, your cat had kittens, or you finally got your toddler potty trained!

Give us a smile!

Thanks

Sharlene
#positive #report
  • Profile picture of the author 4morereferrals
    Last year at about this time I had a major falling out with my father. We were "partners" in a relatively successful insurance brokerage. 23 yrs spent building that business with him and I was a minority shareholder ... brought up old school style at age 22 - from the mail room, thru the accounting office thru customer service dept - finally to the prestigious position of 100% commission only salesperson - with a title of VP. After countless 80-100 hr work weeks over those 20 or so years I mananged to earn 100% ownership of my clients, and 10% of the co stock.

    My Christmas last year sounded a lot like yours is shaping up to be. It was tough. The family rift and the transition to a new agency cost my family of 4 kids and wife, our wonderful home in Sunny So Cal - 3,300 sq ft - end of cul de sac in a very nice neighborhood. There was 20 some odd years of blood sweat and equity tied up in that asset - poof. Commission disputes, mortgage rate reset, kids with braces yada yada yada - the castle had to go, and so did the lifestyle. 2 residential moves in 1.5 years, a transition to a new firm - things have finally settled down a bit.

    My new agency is great. Things are looking up. I finally have the opportunity and time to be free of employee management, and focus on sales and referrals. Ive never had a Nov or Dec of sales to speak of - this year I am the busiest Ive ever been - prospect wise and closed sales. By focusing on Referral Relationships for a solid 8 months and finally making time to do the things I know to do ... Client and Referral Appreciation, I had over $100,000 in sales opportunities on my desk for December [we gross about 15% on the $100k] - Didnt close it all but have never been working on so much opportunity in December before ever.

    Things are looking up and like they will be getting back to the way they were before the big transition and fallout.

    Thru this forum I have discovered blogging. Monetization. Affiliate Networks and Commissions.

    I put up my own site just the other day. Reworked a replicated site I paid for but under my own domain. Secured my own Hostgator hosting [thx forum] Learned how to install wordpress and some cool plug ins.

    Got my first Autorsponder [jvlistpro] up and running. Put 32 weeks of the weekly Insurance Referral Marketing Newsletter in the system and hit PLAY :-)

    Ive identified a few niches I have some expertise in ... and can blog on ... Insurance related. Hobbies... etc ...

    Scored a great WSO from a nice Aus. Lady who seems to make a good living doing it ;-)

    Bought Viral Inviter to - tell some friends.

    Ive signed on as an affiliate for : ShareASale / Amazon / Clickbank and a few others

    Ive made 2 sales in the last 72 hrs. A Hostgator hosting referral to a friend of mine ... $50, and a license to my main internet focus "THANG" - The Ultimate Referral Marketing System $175. Firing up the old autosresponder and reviving a couple hundred people I had on an old list that hadnt heard from me in a while ... hehehe ... taking action kinda works ...

    It breaks my heart to be hearing all the bad news too, and about your bad news. Times are still tuff around here some months as well. I left out all the parts about the lawsuits, attorneys and our corrupt litigation system here in the US ... I KNOW how hard it can be and I know you and other fam's are really hurting. Ours took quite a humbling fall ... How we stuck together really amazes me still. But we did, so can you and you will.

    Strength, Percerverance, Some good Luck, Effort, Will ...

    My good friend of 20 some yrs who runs the shop where I now house my clients has a great license plate on his twin turbo Porsche ....

    --- REZILNT ---

    .... and he is, and we ALL need to be -especially now. I am learning that weekly.

    Keep pressing on, forward and Upward. I pray you and yours have the strength, peace and comfort you need over the holidays.

    Remain REZILNT,

    Steve
    Signature
    Rank Ascend Network - High PR Links / Guaranteed Rankings Increase
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354661].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Joanne Greco
      Sharlene...

      My heart goes out to you. I know it must seem like the world is caving in around you.

      Take a nice deep cleansing breath and repeat these words:
      "This too shall pass". That was my mothers favorite quote and one that has helped me though some rough times. Try not to pile all the negative things you've been going through in one lump. Separate them, so it's not so overwhelming. Work on the ones you have control over, and let go of the ones you don't.

      Tell me a positive story from your everyday life.
      My ten year old daughter made me a Christmas card in Girl Scouts. This is what it said:

      Dear Mommy,
      I hope you have a great Christmas because you deserve it a lot. You help us when we're sad and you're fun. You make everyday like Christmas.
      Love, Jacqueline

      My 13 year old daughter wrote me a note today. Here's what it said:

      Hey Mom,
      Thanks for helping me today with you know what. I made you a cup of tea, it's on top of this note. I went out with Dad to get a Christmas gift for someone that I can't say who. Because I won't be home when you wake up I won't be able to give you a kiss good morning but I will give you one when I come home (even if it's not the morning anymore).
      Love, Shawna

      These notes are like a million dollars to me. My husband & I adopted these two girls (and their brother) five years ago from foster care and I can't imagine my life without them.

      Life Is Good.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354717].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author kazironie
      Dear Sharlene,
      Its good that you came forward to share your pain with us. I remember a saying that, happiness increases with sharing, sorrow decreases when you share. I believe, while in a great pain like you, we should remember that all the negative things are part of the same life where happiness, joy and victory relies. You should remember your own happiest moments alone. I am sure you must have had some great Christmases with your nice kids before. You can think of those. You may also think of some family tours that gave you enormous pleasure. And then put the recent sadness beside them in the same canvas. I believe it will give you some relieve.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355492].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author ExRat
        Hi Mike,
        This morning I woke up in bed with four kids babbling about Christmas tomorrow, two puppies licking my face and my beautiful wife smiling and happy that today starts two weeks of holidays for us together as a family. Everyone is healthy, happy (especially the puppies) and we're content to simply be there together in that moment.
        That conjures up a really happy image. Is there anything more a man could want (except Amstel)? Nice work fella.
        Signature


        Roger Davis

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355506].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author BIG Mike
          Banned
          [DELETED]
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355574].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author ExRat
            Hi Mike,


            I think the only thing more a man could want is for the kids and puppies to disappear for about an hour
            You can't say that about puppies!

            Oh! I get it.

            There might be more prezzies to buy next year though...
            Signature


            Roger Davis

            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355598].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Hey Steve

    That is a great story. Even when things fail they can be turned around! This
    is what I like to hear. Sometimes a little bit of positive can go a long way!

    Blessings

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354687].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Losing loved ones during the holidays puts a damper on a lot of things. I think that is why the rest is getting to me so bad.

    I loved the stories about your children though. :-) My kids are great and they make everything better. I can't imagine how I would feel without them. Good for you and your husband for adopting. There are a lot of kids out there who need someone to love them.

    Blessings

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354730].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Joanne Greco
      Losing loved ones during the holidays puts a damper on a lot of things.
      Yes, it does. It's hard because everyone else is celebrating and you're grieving.

      Every time I hear about losing loved ones near a holiday, I think about my cousin. My mother's cousin lost her son 30 years ago after he got hit by a car on Easter Sunday. For years afterwards, she couldn't celebrate Easter. One year, about 10 years ago, she and her husband were traveling on Easter Sunday to visit their daughter. Her husband had a heart attack in the car and passed away. I can't even imagine what she must have felt. Needless to say, Easter is not a good time for her.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354750].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author CurtisN
    Hi Sharlene,

    I never give gifts to anybody, not my parents, not my friends, not anybody. My parents give me cash in appropriate situations (i.e. birthday, christmas), but they haven't given me a present in awhile. Some may say that's being cheap, or being a Scrooge, but I beg to differ. My parents understand that Christmas (as well as life in general) isn't about presents or material, but about family and happiness. We don't even put up a tree anymore...I honestly can't remember the last time we did...and I'm not even that old
    I don't give gifts to my friends because my greatest gift would be respect and my friendship.

    I haven't been in the IM arena long...just about a year now. I'm proud to say that I've learned more in that year than I have in all the school I've ever attended and will attend. I've gone from naive newbie (if I buy everything, I'll have MORE money) to realist (get your ass moving, or stay poor). I'm now completely focused on one particular money-making method and plan on making a killing in the coming months.

    Ok, so this is kind of lame, but still sound advice:
    "It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."
    -Confucius
    Signature
    Curtis Ng (blog) - Product Launch Manager
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354738].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Buildingfutures
    Well, earlier this year, I found out my girlfriend of two years had been cheating on me, with nearly a dozen men while we were together.

    The day before valentines day I was fired from my radio DJ job.

    I had to move back in with my parents, hit an amazing depression without a job.

    Then, I found a job, and started working as a landscaper. I had several near death experiences where a tree fell on me, I almost got pulled into a woodchipper, and I fell off a house while doing some maintenance.

    Somewhere, along the way I found my way out of my depression.

    I met a beautiful woman on the night I got my first tattoo, I was hyper as all hell and she is the shyest girl I have ever met. She was so nice to me the night I met her, and she gave me her number and every day for the next four months I called her every day and left a nice message, or left a nice text message.

    For four months, and she rarely if ever called me or texted me back. But i liked her that much. Even when I moved away I kept it up.

    Then, about two months later, we began talking on a daily basis.

    Then, two months after that, I asked her to be my girl, even though we weren't living near each other at the time.

    Then I went and visited her the week of halloween, and asked her to be my girl then.

    She said yes, and I'm the happiest boy in the world. I've been trying to raise a little money to spend on her when I see her for newyears, but its been a little difficult.

    ITs no matter though, I love her dearly and she supports me in everything I do and loves me for my crazy self.

    I could only be happier when I move her here to live with me.
    Signature

    Simple Mission Statement "Under the Radar and Over the Top!"
    Sean's Guide To The Forum
    Thoughts of a 22 Year Old Marketer

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354780].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Curtis

    I think that is really sad. I hope that when you have children you will see things a little different.

    Joanne

    That is just heart breaking. I can't imagine what that poor woman has dealt with. It just goes to show that no matter how bad you think things are for you, they are worse for someone else.

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354783].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author CurtisN
      Originally Posted by spraven View Post

      Curtis

      I think that is really sad. I hope that when you have children you will see things a little different.


      Sharlene
      I'm sorry, that was meant as a positive message. The main point I was trying to make is that material shouldn't be our main concern, but the people we keep close to us and what we have now.

      When I have kids, they will get presents, but I will also teach them what I think happiness means and hopefully they will interpret it in a positive way.
      Signature
      Curtis Ng (blog) - Product Launch Manager
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354847].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Buildingfutures

    I'm glad things are going better for you! I guess I shouldn't say I'm depressed, at least not in the clinical sense of the word. I should just say I am really sad right now, and needed something positive to make me smile. I normally love Christmas, but I am letting my kids down this year so it is a little harder.

    I hope you and your girlfriend live happily ever after! ;-)

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354798].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Buildingfutures
      Originally Posted by spraven View Post

      Buildingfutures

      I'm glad things are going better for you! I guess I shouldn't say I'm depressed, at least not in the clinical sense of the word. I should just say I am really sad right now, and needed something positive to make me smile. I normally love Christmas, but I am letting my kids down this year so it is a little harder.

      I hope you and your girlfriend live happily ever after! ;-)

      Sharlene
      Thanks Sharlene!

      I'm Sean by the way.

      I'm sorry you have to let your kids down, but I'm sure they understand, and they're sure mommy will make it up on their birthdays
      Signature

      Simple Mission Statement "Under the Radar and Over the Top!"
      Sean's Guide To The Forum
      Thoughts of a 22 Year Old Marketer

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354804].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Tim Whiston
      It's ALL Perspective...

      I really hope you can see a light at the end of the tunnel. I'm sorry you don't have presents for your kids this year, but you love them enough for that to bother you so I'd say they're in pretty good hands.

      Anything Positive to report?

      Well I'd say every person in this forum either at least has enough prosperity to have their own computer and Internet connection, or has the ingenuity to leverage someone else's computer and Internet connection.

      I don't want to belittle. I know about tough times and I know it's all relative.

      I've had my share of ruts and so forth, to the extent of being homeless and penniless at one point in my life. But you seriously have to switch perspective and use relativity to your advantage if you want to be happy and stay sane.

      Look at all the things that are going right in your life. And again I KNOW there are a few things on the bright side for everyone in this place.

      The people who are really in bad shape in this world don't have a roof or electricity, much less a connection to the Web and the luxury of complaining to people in a business forum.

      AGAIN: I am not being flippant here. There are some tough times right now for sure.

      But the very worst thing AND I DO MEAN THE VERY WORST THING POSSIBLE anyone can do right now is fuel the fire of this whole recession pitch.

      We may very well see more upheaval but it will only get as bad as we make it by complaining and screaming "the sky is falling". It's important for us to keep our heads, stay positive, and turn the damn news off because most of what they have to say is CRAP anyway.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354821].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author rosetrees
      Originally Posted by spraven View Post

      I normally love Christmas, but I am letting my kids down this year so it is a little harder.
      No way are you letting your kids down. You love them, you're there for them, you'll give them a fun day. You'll only let them down if you are miserable. Be happy and they will too.

      If this awful time teaches the world anything, I hope it is that there is more to life than "things". Yes we all want them and we all have them. In my family expensive presents were never given or expected and they still aren't.

      To think that we can only have a good time at Christmas if we give expensive presents or eat expensive food is sad. Go out and buy some apples, butter and sugar. Make toffee apples, tie some tinsel on them and hang them from the tree for the kids to find.

      My story for this year? A long story - so very briefly. I was living in a tied cottage and working part time for an estate. I have ME. I had a relapse 18 months ago. They didn't like it and in Feb this year told me to leave. I like the village and wanted to stay. Totally out of the blue a mutual friend put me in touch with some people I'd never met who had a converted barn that was coming empty. The rest is history and I've been here since May. This gave me the kick I needed to start looking seriously into IM. I still have a lot to learn and need to learn to focus. I've made lots of friends in the village and run the village website.

      The sting in the tail?? I went down with flu two days ago. I'm laid up in bed instead of travelling to my family. Yesterday was my birthday. The good side - I've had loads of visitors over the last few days that I would have missed if I'd gone away as planned. The bad side - could be beans on toast for Xmas lunch, but I feel too horrid to care! Roll on next year.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355736].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author ladyjane
        Sometimes you have to find happiness in the small joys. I, too, am having a difficult Christmas season. This time last year, my husband and I were very well off financially and had just moved into our dream house (we were renting it, but we could afford the high payment)...it had a pool, a hot tub, tile throughout.....we loved it! We even had enough money to bring my sister-in-law down from New York to stay with us for 11 days, and we showed our entire family a great time for the holidays. Things were going great.

        Then, in September, the company I'd been doing regular copywriting for for 2 years went out of business, taking along with it half my income. Then, in October, I had to go out on short-term disability from my other job as an investigator, due to the rheumatoid arthritis in my wrists and knees acting up. Then, a few weeks after that, our landlord told us he was losing the house and we'd have to move. We hadn't even been there a year yet, and we had a two year lease! Without the money from my copywriting job, and the reduced disability income, we had to put ourselves a couple of thousand dollars into debt to move into a new place. Then, almost as soon as we moved into the new place in November, our 12 year old cat was diagnosed with diabetes, only now we ddn't have the money to get her proper treatment (we're trying to treat her through diet changes now).

        My scheduled disability check didn't come at the beginning of December, since my doctor didn't get the paperwork in to the insurance company in a timely manner, which left us without money for December rent on the new place, so now we're looking at having to move AGAIN within a month of moving in! And finally, my husband, who suffers from clinical depression so badly he's been on disability for it for the past 4 years, is suicidal, so there's that to cope with on top of everything else (coordinating things with his therapist and psychiatrist to make sure he stays safe, etc.). And is there any money for presents? No! We're making cookies for everyone, instead.

        However, despite the tough time we're having, there ARE some happy things, and that's what I hold onto. I've made quite a few sales through my blogs the past few weeks, which always makes me happy. I've picked up a few small copywriting gigs here and there that I didn't even solicit (people came to me through word of mouth, and a few previous customers appeared again needing work). I sold a few domain names on eBay. I sold a few things on Craigslist from around the house that I didn't use anymore. I've made enough money to keep us fed and the utilities turned on through these things, in spite of not having rent money. Plus, my husband is expecting two new grandchildren soon, so we've got new additions to the family coming, and my family is all healthy and happy. We get to go see them for the holidays, since they only live 45 minutes away.

        So, there are good things. Times are tough for everyone, and I realize that. I keep telling my husband it's not just us that's struggling right now. And I hold onto the good things, because no matter how bad things get, when you really think about it, you'll almost always realize it's not ALL bad. And I have every hope that things will be great again soon. Life is full of ups and downs, and we've been up before as well as down before, so I know we'll be up again. I have no doubt.
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355830].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author Bruce Wedding
          Exactly 20 Christmases ago, our 3rd Christmas as a family, things were bleak. The economy in Houston was totally ravaged by the oil bust. Unemployment was high and I couldn't find a job doing anything. We'd been existing on my wife's minimum wage income for 3 months but were 2 months behind on the rent. We were literally waiting for the notice on the door that Christmas. All my wife's income was used for food and gas.

          We drove out to the country to cut a Christmas tree. We bought a few gifts on the only credit card we had, Montgomery Wards. We ate Christmas dinner at my parents and the gas to drive there was almost all we had left.

          That was the low point for our family. By January, I'd found a good job and things started picking up. We've never looked back. Since that year, with one small exception, I've made more money than the previous year.

          But here's the interesting part. When my wife and I think back on the Christmases we've spent together, she thinks that one was the best. There was more focus on family, she LOVED the tree and it just stands out in her mind as a great Christmas.

          Now, I'm not going to say I agree completely, but I see where she is coming from. I was just under so much stress at the time that it was hard to enjoy it. But in the big scheme of things, it all worked out in the end.

          The good thing about hitting bottom is, there's only one direction to go.
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[356022].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author 4morereferrals
            The good thing about hitting bottom is, there's only one direction to go.
            So True sir.

            Another lesson I learned about hitting bottom ... you choose where it is, and what you're going to do change it. Now matter how low you think you've hit, it can get worse - try and find thanks in all things.

            Every year at this time - we as a family - All 6 of us - sit and watch a movie. Gets me everytime to - you might watch it some time.

            Jimmy Stewart in - Its a Wonderful Life.
            Signature
            Rank Ascend Network - High PR Links / Guaranteed Rankings Increase
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[356051].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Sylvia Meier
    Sharlene,
    I am on your list and read your updates as they happened and my heart goes out to you.

    You asked for a positive story and here is my christmas story for this year. On Saturday, my youngest daughters cat got out somehow. It has been in the -30 range for weeks now so it is way too cold for cats to be out, not to mention the 2 feet of snow we are covered in.

    We called for her, went out in the blizzard everything and there was no sign of her. Today after I posted her as lost with the local SPCA, I heard a scratch at the door and there she was. For only being gone a few days she seems very thin, it looks like she may lose a portion of her tail and part of one ear, but my little girl was so excited to see her cat (she's only 2) and sat petting her in front of a heat vent for well over an hour.

    Also this christmas for the first time in years we were able to put toys beneath the tree. We've always had christmas, but for a few years things have been really hard and this year we made christmas happen ourselves. All the bills are finally caught up and for the first time I see a light at the end of the tunnel. I have also donated more to charities this year, then I ever spent on christmas any years prior.

    So that is my happy story.

    Things will get better. The way I looked at it when I was where you are now is that they only way to go from there is up and the fact that you are not a quitter either will ensure that. Best of luck and if I can do anything to help please let me know.

    Sylvia
    Signature
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354809].message }}
    • After putting a lot of money into development on my new software company, maintaining my current operations, and paying my ridiculous bills (I found out a shiny new car isn't good for you the hard way), I was at the point where I couldn't afford to see my family for christmas.

      So I figured it was time to dust off the old contacts and do a bit of freelancing to raise some extra cash. Before I could even start talking to them I got not one, but three jobs dumped right on my lap I raised way more than I was aiming for and am now typing this message from my mother's house in Florida. So that worked out well, I'm even thinking of doing a very limited WSO for warriors at a crazy 50% off my current rates to thank this great community (and get a bit of extra capital of course!)

      The most positive thing I can say about a recession is that it weeds out the people who aren't in it for the long haul, and I always welcome less competition. If you need cash fast I would recommend using your expertise to land some direct business / clients.
      Signature
      www.HumanRewriter.com - The Web's Only Source For 100% People Powered Content Solutions.
      My WSO: I'll Give You $5.00 Plus $43.50 In Bonuses To Try Human Rewriter Today
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354841].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Sylvia

    That is a happy story! I love cats and have 2 of my own. My kids would be heart broken if something happened to them, and I would be crying right along with them.

    Things are worse this year than they have since Scott first got sick, but I do know that things will get better. We don't have anything under the tree, but the kids know I will make it up to them when I can.

    We are going to spend the day playing board games though, and they will enjoy that. I really suck at board games and the kids get a kick out of beating me.

    Blessings

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354824].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author mmurtha
    Hi Sharlene,

    Sorry for your loss, and trouble you guys have been going thru, but as you said, it's not just you. Many people are struggling at this point unfortunately.

    If a story will help cheer you up, and possibly someone else, I'm game.

    This is a true story about what's happening in eastern Ohio - towns, cities, names, and face have been changed to protect the innocent ...


    I live in a very small town of about 100 people. In fact, this entire area is made up of small towns or villages if you like. Most of the young people moved to the bigger cities to raise their kids, and get good paying jobs since most of the mills and plants closed. Of course this isn't anything new. It's been going on for years.

    For the past 3-4 months though, we've been seeing the foreclosure notice listings in the paper get longer and longer because people lost their jobs they've held for most of their lives. It's gotten so bad here that people are knocking on people's doors asking if they can stay overnight and get fed.

    The good news is that this recession pulled our communities together, strengthened us, gave us a new purpose, and showed us how to love the unlovable!

    Some members of our community and 3 others decided to have a joint meeting in one of the schools so we could pull our resources together and help people in need.

    So far, we've been able to stop 18 foreclosures. open 7 very small temperary shelters (sleeps about 7-10) where homeless people can stay for a couple of days, help find about 36 people jobs, and managed to feed over 150 people a day with hot meals in 2 locations.

    We know this isn't a large contribution, but for us, every little bit helps.

    And to be quite frank about it, most of us are sacrificing out traditional Christmas, to gift those in need. This is something even the kids got involved with.

    Lol I heard one little girl that is about 8 years old telling us that she'd rather give up her Christmas gifts if it would help put someone else in a home.

    Yes, we cry over here too, but these are tears of joy in the midst of chaos during a Christmas season we'll never forget.

    Btw, we've gotten out of ourselves by helping others, and God is blessing us all with his love and mercy.

    I know he's blessing you and Scott too. Sometimes it's hard to see the blessings thru the fog. Hang in there, the fog will clear.


    Mary
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354826].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Tim

    I get what you are saying. But let me tell you something...

    I started this day off in a total funk. We do love our kids more than anything in the world, and that is one of the reasons that this Christmas is so hard.

    However, throughout the day I have read stories about new babies, kids saying the cutest things, people making things right with one another, and jokes that had me rolling!

    I am going to bed with a smile on my face, and I didn't have one when I got up!

    Every day people, with every day goodness to report. It has been a wonderful thing.

    I had one man tell me a story about his 5 year old son who likes a girl in his class. The girl is a tomboy who hates dresses and the color pink.

    The little boy asked his dad if he thought the girl would wear a dress to their wedding when they grew up.

    How cute is that!

    I know it may sound strange to you, but you wouldn't believe the little things that have had an impact on my mood today.

    Blessings to you!

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354848].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Tim Whiston
      Originally Posted by spraven View Post

      Tim

      I get what you are saying. But let me tell you something...

      I started this day off in a total funk. We do love our kids more than anything in the world, and that is one of the reasons that this Christmas is so hard.

      However, throughout the day I have read stories about new babies, kids saying the cutest things, people making things right with one another, and jokes that had me rolling!

      I am going to bed with a smile on my face, and I didn't have one when I got up!

      Sharlene
      That's great. I'm glad you've received a lift.

      And I just want to emphasize that my post was intended to help you feel better... it's not always easy to get a message across in a forum where others can't see your face and hand movements, etc. but I hope you didn't perceive my comments as negative or condescending because that's not what I intended.

      ALSO... another poster said something about cats. Wow I missed this the first time and let me just say as a feline parent myself I am deeply sorry to anyone who has lost one of their kitties.

      I too would be crushed in that event. Every time I lose an animal friend it's a very serious matter for me and it truly takes another animal lover to understand that.

      I know you'll pull through what you're going through right now. I didn't recognize you at first but now I remember in 2007 you guys helped a partner and I with a product launch, sold some good numbers for us even during a time when there were some health issues at home.

      If there's anything I can do to help you at this time please drop me a note.I'll gladly do what I can, and again I know you'll find a way because that's what real entrepreneurs do, and you clearly have earned that title.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355603].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author ExRat
        Hi Tim,

        If it makes any difference, I understood your original message.
        Signature


        Roger Davis

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355612].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Wow I can't even keep up! ;-)

    Mary, God Bless You and all the others who are doing such good work. Isn't it wonderful to see people to pull together. Things are crazy right now, and if people pull together we will all pull out of it!

    My kids know the true meaning of Christmas and they are always happy to give to others. We always want more for them than they want for themsleves. They are very giving children. The local childrens shelter and the Salvation Army are their favorite places to donate to.

    This Christmas hurts me For them more than it hurts them.

    YellowDot--I hope you make enough to see your family soon. My family makes me crazy, but I wouldn't trade them for anything....Not even my brothers or my mother-in-law! lol

    Blessings

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354868].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author mmurtha
    Hi Sharlene,

    Yes it is. It's a heck of a good experience just to wacth the wonder if you know what I mean.

    Sometimes the kids do better than any adult will because their hearts aren't corrupted yet lol. I probably learn more from kids this way then what I could possibly drum up myself. If you listen to them, they will let you know.

    If it'll help, every time you may feel a little guilty about not giving them a Christmas like normal, think about the heart of your kids, and their readiness to view things as they are.

    Btw, it sounds like you are ready to here this in the spirit it was meant so ...


    Merry Christmas, and may you have a
    prosperous and blessed New Year!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354901].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    Mary

    Merry Christmas to you too! You really would not believe the change in my mood today.

    About a week ago we built a wedding site to flip to make the extra money for Christmas. When it didn't sell my mood continued to get worse to the point that I was just in a total funk.

    When I got up this morning I knew that something had to change. I was signing my email "Bah Humbug"...How horrible is that!

    I made this post here and in another forum that I belong to and you would not believe the stories that I have heard!

    Every day people, Every Day Stories, Every Day Miracles! It has been so wonderful.

    My mood has really improved through the day. When I talked to my mother-in-law this afternoon, she remarked that I sounded happier than I have in several days.

    The Power of the Positive!

    Blessings to you

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[354921].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ExRat
      Hi Sharlene,

      The majority of kids in our countries will get many presents this year. And due to human nature being as it is, they really won't appreciate them that much. They will be 'just more' presents.

      But your kids will never forget that they had one (or some) Christmasses that were different. Naturally, to you, this is a bad thing.

      But I'm sure that they are aware of the reasons why. If you hadn't made the effort to visit family, help out and pay your respects, but the kids had presents instead, would that be a better situation? I think you know the answer.

      They have learnt about priorities and sacrifice.

      This Christmas may be a difficult lesson for them. But the way that life works is that from that difficult lesson will spring much future happiness. Your kids will not go through their lives failing to appreciate the little, but important things.

      They may encounter friends who's parents (for a variety of reasons) ALWAYS made sure that their kids got a present. But did little else - the world is full of these situations. And they will then compare it to a few difficult Christmasses where they had no presents, but had the love of a family.

      ...............

      True example - from the age of 6, my father lived 15 minutes walk away from my house. I saw him a little for four years but at age 10 things changed and I saw him only twice a year for 5 minutes as he 'did his duty' and dropped off a meaningless present for Christmas or my birthday. He had nothing meaningful to say to me and he didn't want to be there. But he always paid my mother the maintenance money for me and my sister.

      He had four step children and my sister also went to stay with him on occasion, but once my half brother was born (when I was 10), it was decided that I should be ejected from that side of the family and a suitable reason was invented and presented to me - I was accused of being a thief and banned from his house by his wife. I become the 'black sheep.'

      This went on for 20 years. I desperately needed a father figure in my life when I was young. It would have made the world of difference if he had appeared to have liked me or been proud of me and done nothing else different.

      But as time has passed, I have become aware of the fact that what I foolishly considered to be the worst situation that could happen to anyone, is far from it. There are so many things I am grateful for and the world is brimming with tragedy and people who would swap their lives for mine and their difficulties for mine in a heartbeat. I only really became a man when I realised this and vowed to remember it every day.

      After 20 years, things changed for my father (due to a bereavement) and I had become a man. I was presented with a choice. I could unleash 20 years of anger on him that I had allowed to make a mess of my life. Instead, I made a decision to try and understand the reasons and to forgive him. By then I had made a mess of my own family and had a son who I didn't live with anymore. There was nothing I could do to avoid it. I learnt from this. That negative created a positive.

      I now get on with and respect my father, understand and accept the situation, and we don't let the past ruin the present. I have the most amazing son in the world and we are as like as two peas, and have a strong bond. I'll be spending Christmas alone, but that holds absolutely no fear or problem for me whatsoever. The future looks good, and I will have my son to stay on the 27th.

      ...........

      Many people will do their children a dis-service by spoiling them this year. You will be doing the opposite. It may not feel that way, but that's the way life is.

      Fast forward to the future and try to envisage your own children providing a memorable Christmas for their own children. None of it will be meaningless to them. The right things will be important to them. They will benefit in the future (and so will their children) because of this hardship now.

      There really are many positives inside the negatives. This is how the lessons in life unfold. You just have to learn to see them - and I don't mean to condescend - I'm sure you know this already, but I'm just providing a friendly nudge. You are feeling bad because you DO care about them so much.

      Get over it quick and remember that what will stick in their minds forever is the example that you set during difficult times. These are the things that make them proud in the future when they look back at where there roots are and see where their own strengths come from.

      I can do this too. I am proud of my roots - regardless of the difficult situations that were bestowed upon my family, and how that made me feel while I was young.

      I chose to feel sorry for myself when I was young because I had a selfish, loser's attitude. The difficulties that I endured tempered me like metal, to become the strong person I am today - likewise for anyone else experiencing difficulties. Don't focus on the current difficulty, focus on what your response to that difficulty can do for you in the future, and for the people who are observing you dealing with it. It's an exponential thing.
      Signature


      Roger Davis

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355238].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author kennethtang
    Sharlene,

    Here are some tweets I made at Twitter.

    If they not be the brightness of the sun, may they yet be the candle that lights the room.

    ================================================== =

    "Cherry blossoms, falling onto winter snow, dancing in the wind,
    A Warrior kneels, prays, and embraces emptiness;
    Listen to the wind, it calls your name,
    Look into a mirror, and see your soul,
    Look into a mirror, and see...Greatness.

    When I die, scatter me to the winds, the waters,
    the fires, the four corners of the earth. But now I live,
    and life is beautiful"

    ================================================== =======

    Oh spectre of despair, buffet me if you will; throw me to the wolves of darkness, if you please, but I will not yield,

    Dark sky of starless night, blanket my head with showers of fear, if you please, but I will NOT yield!;

    KIll me, dismember me, scorch my soul and kill me spirit, if you will, but I will NOT yield!

    Oh, wretched fear, creature of darkness that prey upon men's hearts...up yours!

    ================================================== =======

    "Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light" - Dylan Thomas

    ================================================== =======

    Finally, a poem I wrote years ago, on a lonely Christmas eve, after I came close to ending it all in one fell swoop:

    The Gift Of Life
    ---------------
    Through life, I've wandered, I was alone.
    Lost in a wilderness where Light never shone.
    Looking for love in all the wrong places,
    Looking for love in too many faces.

    Hoping in things that always pass,
    Hoping in things that never last.

    Then came You to me, You said "Come home.
    Come with Me, I'll set you free, I'll give you Life,
    and lead you Home"

    Now, though the nights be long, yet a Light shall shine,
    A Light that shines as flames of fire, and it changes
    water into wine.

    Now like an eagle am I, in flight,
    winging through the greatest height,
    For you, O Lord, You gave I,
    The Gift Of Life"

    ----------------------------------

    Have a blessed Xmas and God bless

    Kenneth

    Ps. If you're interested...
    - Twitter Search
    - Twitter Search
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355264].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author raydp
    I've had lot's of ups and downs in my life including health and financial. Finances are always up and down but I'm not alone in that. My health is not as it should be, but stable.

    Am I happy? You bet I am! 25 years ago I met and later married the most amazing woman. We are "superglued" together and love every minute of it.

    Also, following the break up of my first marriage 28 years ago, I lost contact with my two sons. Four years ago, against the wishes of their mother we were re-united and now enjoy a great relationship. What you might call the icing on the cake!

    Happy Christmas and a happy new year to you all.

    Special best wishes to the "Raven's Nest".

    Ray
    Signature

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355283].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author jayden.fellze
    We need to understand that change is the only constant thing. It is really important to believe that things will change for good. Never let negative thoughts bring you down. Looking forward to a positive change will help one get through troubles. Tackle one problem at a time. Things will eventually change.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[355721].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author spraven
    I'm glad you all have happy times to report, and hope you had a good Christmas.

    Sharlene
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[358645].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ExRat
      Hi Sharlene,

      I'm glad you all have happy times to report, and hope you had a good Christmas.
      :confused:
      Signature


      Roger Davis

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[359078].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author spraven
        Originally Posted by ExRat View Post

        Hi Sharlene,



        :confused:
        I'm sorry Roger! I'm having a very difficult time and I didn't mean for it to come through in my tone.

        There are so many posts here that I wasn't able to keep up with them. I have had a severe stress headache for a couple of days, so I wasn't here as much.

        I really am glad that there is still so many good things to be said, and there is always a bright side to dark days.

        You all lifted my spirits, and I feel blessed to be able to come here and vent sometimes where there are still people who will pick you up and brush you off when you fall so to speak!

        I have had to be the strong one in the family in the years since Scott got sick. All my family and friends expect me to be strong and buck up, so I am not allowed to have a down day in their opinion.

        It felt good to let off steam here and not be judged too harshly.

        I do hope that you all did have a very Merry Christmas, and that in the coming year you will be greatly Blessed.

        Blessings

        Sharlene
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[359086].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author ExRat
          Hi Sharlene,

          there is always a bright side
          Signature


          Roger Davis

          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[359137].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author dndoseller
    Sure, I made 20 dollars as an affiliate while opening gifts with my family yesterday - my highest day yet. That is $600 a month if it keeps up - and it has only increased over time - the economy has had no effect on that trend. Until I discovered IM I thought would be working for someone else for the rest of my life - now I think semi-retirement within the next 10 years is a real possibility.
    Signature
    DanoSongs.com - Royalty Free Music for Marketing Videos

    No sign up required to try my music in your video.

    Just click to listen and download. No cost to try, only pay when you publish.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[359785].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author absolutelee
    Here are a couple of things that might help.

    1) This is going to sound really hokey, but go to the library and get a copy of Dr. Normal Vincent Peale's book The Power of Positive Thinking. Following through with the suggestions in that book literally changed my life!

    2) I don't mean this next suggestion to be cruel or unfeeling. It's really hard to express subtle thoughts via writing on the Internet. So, give me some leeway. Here goes...

    Quit thinking about yourself and your problems so much. Get out of yourself. Look around you and start figuring out what you can do that can help others. It doesn't have to be money. You can...

    Write great posts here that will help others make money.

    Find a neighbor who needs help and help them.

    Volunteer.

    Just go out of your way to make yourself available to others without any notion of getting anything back.

    Give!

    I kid you not! It's completely amazing how fast this will change the direction of your life and put you back on the right course.

    God Bless, and I hope this helps!

    (PS, quit reading the newspaper, looking at the news, reading the news on your Yahoo reader. The news is for losers. You're a winner! If you want to know what the weather is doing, go outside!)
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[359810].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Brad Spencer
    Originally Posted by spraven View Post

    I hope you will forgive me if I ramble for a minute.

    In the middle of September we received a phone call telling us that the house that we had been leasing for 3 1/2 years was no longer going to available, and we were being forced to move.

    After Scott had heart surgery in June the doctor had told me that it would be good for him to be in a less stressful environment. So when we had to move we moved to a nice small town in a new state.

    We got completely moved in mid- October and I spent the rest of the month unpacking.

    The first part of November Scott's maternal grandmother suffered a massive stroke and we made the 5 hour trip to be with her. She passed away on November 11th. Between the hospital stay and the funeral we were there almost 2 weeks.

    30 days later on December 11th Scott's paternal grandmother passed away and we made the 5 hour trip again to be there for the funeral. We ended up getting iced in while we were there, and had to stay for almost a week.

    The recession has been hitting us hard anyway so the past few months have been tough.

    For the first time ever our kids have no presents under the tree, and for the first time ever we will not be going home to spend Christmas with my family.

    I think if one more person tells me Merry Christmas I might have a meltdown! I am stressed and maybe a little depressed.

    I see Jenn Dize trying to help someone save their house(I just saw this and will see what I have) and a few days ago I saw Dr.Mani trying to help someone save a business that had been running for 10 years. I see the same thing here. People are in bad shape!

    Marketers like us who used to be able to make a living are losing everything they have.

    Yesterday we received an email from a big name marketer who was trying to raise money to pay his tax bill. I had another pm today from a marketer that you would all know, who has lost his business and is now homeless.

    Every time you turn on the news or read the paper, all you see is death and destruction, banks failing, people losing their houses, and screaming recession.

    People come to the forum and say "I give up" nothing is working.

    But with Scott being sick and kids counting on me, giving up is not an option for me.

    So right now I could use a little bit of positive! We are all normal people living normal lives.

    Tell me a positive story from your everyday life. I don't care if you found your lost dog, your cat had kittens, or you finally got your toddler potty trained!

    Give us a smile!

    Thanks

    Sharlene
    Sharlene,

    A year ago I had no business, no job prospects, and no plan after I graduated college.

    Fast forward a year...I work at Disney World (magic is addicting here), a business, and I'm going on a cruise January 4th.

    Why did this happen? Mix a little fate and hard work. Yes times are hard and I'm very blessed that nothing major has happened to me.

    However, you have your family and you love them. Whenever I'm down (which happens more than I like), I always think about those less fortunate. There are places where people don't even eat...literally! 2 Billion people don't have clean water (how often do you turn on the tap and not think twice about this one).

    Maybe this isn't as "positive" but a little perspective always helps me out.

    Best wishes and Merry Christmas (please don't melt down..you're blessed to be alive

    Brad Spencer
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[359890].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Sharlene,

    Losing loved ones is hard. We all cross over, though, and the late autumn and early winter is a beautiful time of year to make the crossing - when all the world itself is returning to a peaceful slumber. I hope that when my time comes I can say goodbye while nature is settling back into repose.

    We don't have much time before we follow those who go ahead, so remember it is only a short parting and you will see them again -- but not just yet.

    I just returned to the Great Northwest from the East. It was pretty there and had it's own charms, but it never felt like home to me. I stayed in one town out here for a month while I searched around and then landed myself about one hundred miles north of where I stopped to search the perfect place - and now on Christmas week I found what I have been searching for.

    It is beautiful beyond belief here, the air is dry and crisp, the mountains begin just blocks from my home, which is cozy and warm. The people here have that priceless laid back ethos I missed out East. There are both colleges and ski resorts, it is a geological wonderland and the rockhounding is incredible. There are gemstones in every direction just scattering the hillsides and plains. There are millions of acres open for Munchie and I to roam and explore. I knew it was home the minute I got here, it holds all of the wonder and excitement that I believe we are meant to find on this planet.

    And Munchie has stayed with me and healthy past his lifespan to enjoy this perfect place with me for awhile before he moves on.

    I have done worse financially in my life - I have done better. But very few places have I found the inner peace that I feel here. Very few places offer the style of adventure that keep me whole and sane.

    I hope you find peace and wonder on your journey through this life, too. It isn't always pleasant. Sometimes we have to say "see you later" to those whose company we cherish - but we can make it what it is meant to be so that when our time comes to move on to the next world we can look back and smile at what we found on our journey.
    Signature

    Sal
    When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
    Beyond the Path

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[360074].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sevenish
    I have something positive to report:

    You and your family are together, and not only for the holiday.

    Scott had you and the kids to help him through the loss of his grandparents. Your kids have you and Scott. You have your family.

    I don't see how a lack of perfunctory gifts is going to move the needle much on the remembered hardship meter. In fact, I doubt your kids will remember it as anything but part of a warm and positive continuum of your lives together. They'll remember the good times and that you were together to get through the tougher times, such as the bereavements.

    I think that's all pretty positive. I know it's tough to see past the financial issues sometimes, but you've got a great deal for which to be thankful, so stay positive!

    Best wishes and happy holidays.
    Signature

    100% atrocity-free! No annihilations, assasinations, explosions, killers, crushers, massacres, bombs, skyrockets or nukes.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[360145].message }}

Trending Topics