Why in tarnation is everythang dead???

20 replies
PRODUCT LAUNCHES IS DEAD! FACEBOOK IS DEAD! ARTICLE MARKETING IS DEAD! DEAD DEAD DEAD...

Evertime I come into the WF I have found that somethin else has died! What in thunderation is causin all this? Is there a dadgum online flue goin round? Is this caused by sexually translated diseases? Has the interneet been spreadin gentle warts? Has ever dadburn person online done caught gonetokorea?

Lookie here now, not everthang is dead. In interneet marketeering there IS some thangs you should not be doin, just like in life there is some thangs you should not be doin!

In life...

you should NOT let yore 12 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids!

you should NOT load yore dishwasher by gettin yore wife drunk!

you should NOT marry yore sweetheart if there is a law against it where you live!

you should NOT light a match in yore bathroom after doin yore business unless you want to blow yore house right off it's wheels!

you should NOT go Googlin the word "Volvo" cause you thank it is part of a woman's anatomy!

you should NOT make an officer of the law angry when he asks you to be showin him yore ID by showin him yore belt buckle!

you should NOT take yore sweetheart flowers you done stole from the cemetary!

you should NOT buy deodorant if you live alone cause it is a good waste of money!

you should NOT bring a date to the weddin if you is the groom!

you should NOT drive one a them U-Hauls to the funeral home even if you DO know yore included in the will


Now then, in interneet marketeering...

you SHOULD be usin original content instead of spun articles an rehashed PLR!

you SHOULD be writin yore content for yore visitors and not for the dadgum search engines

you SHOULD be providin a quality product at a reasonable price

you SHOULD be focusin on gettin ONE thang done instead of tryin to do fifty thangs

you SHOULD stick with ONE thang instead of jumpin all over the place when somethin brand spankin new comes down the pike!

you SHOULD stop follerin all them other folks round like little lemmins runnin for the cliff cause they ain't makin no money either!

you SHOULD stop thankin that ever brand new WSO that comes round is gonna make you rich!

you SHOULD start doin a little less readin and a lot more doin!

you SHOULD stop tryin to make $50,000 ever month and start tryin to make $500 ever month

you SHOULD start workin with other folks if you cain't seem to get nothin done by yoreself!

you SHOULD start lookin at what you can do RIGHT NOW instead of the big picture!

Do you be knowin how you eat an elephant? Well, the answer is that YOU DON'T! If you is hungry, start with a dadburn squirrel and then work up to the rest!

I shore do hope this helps you out some! Just remember that tain't nothin dead until it starts to stinkin to high heaven... well, even then, it may just need a bath!!!
#dead #everythang #tarnation
  • Profile picture of the author Robert M Gouge
    LOL. Thank you... I needed that today.
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  • Profile picture of the author Willie Crawford
    Dang it!

    I hope I can get the coffee you done made me spill outta
    my keybored.

    I really don't want to git use to a new computer. I'm jest
    now git'n comfy with Window 3.x. I know it's a gov'ment
    conspiracy to make us by new computers by changing things
    every 10 years...

    That was funny though.... struck a little close to home.

    Willie
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    • Profile picture of the author kencalhn
      lol thanks for the chuckle, well written. Hey Willie, good to see you on the wf, I've been absent a few years... keep up the good work.
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      • Profile picture of the author Willie Crawford
        Originally Posted by kencalhn View Post

        lol thanks for the chuckle, well written. Hey Willie, good to see you on the wf, I've been absent a few years... keep up the good work.

        Hi Ken, I don't spend as much time here as I use to. Keep pretty
        busy brokering JVs lately.


        I think that Denver was the last time that we saw each other.

        You still in day trading?

        Willie
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  • Profile picture of the author Buildingfutures
    Damn rednecks and their redneck wisdom. For your information my daughter is 11 and she is still pregnant, so she can smoke all she wants at the table.

    -Sean
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  • Profile picture of the author ArticlePrince
    I'm glad that drives someone else crazy, the only thing that I know of that's dead is Lycos
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  • Profile picture of the author SuiteJ
    Thanks for the great LOLs. Some excellent advice as well.

    Part of the reason everything is "dead" is because it's the latest trend for introducing a new product.

    The worst I've seen lately?

    "Selling digital info products doesn't work anymore! If you want to survive, by my new digital info product to find out how to profit in this new era where everything is dead"... :|
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  • Profile picture of the author askloz
    too funny. needed a laugh.. awesome stuff
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  • Profile picture of the author Jason Anderson
    That's pretty dag nab funny...

    Shuks.....maybe I can make enuf money to fix my truck, get momma outta prison, and get a head stone for my dog with this advise.

    This bit of advise can get just bout any cousin outta the river:

    "you SHOULD start lookin at what you can do RIGHT NOW instead of the big picture!"

    Keep plugin
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    Jason Anderson
    Promotional Video Production - Learn how to get a FREE Custom Video with Professional Voice Over Every Month

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    • Profile picture of the author Tina Golden
      Geesh, Thad, I keep telling everybody why everything keeps dying.

      It's the steroids and the crack.
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      • It's the steroids and the crack.
        Dagnabit Tina, I thank you done went and missed the point!What in tarnation does a plumber with hemorrhoids have to do with anythin?
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        Thaddaeus T. Hogg, The Hillbilly Marketeer
        http://www.hillbillymarketer.com
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  • Profile picture of the author DPM70
    Even with the humor it's a huge YAWN!
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  • Profile picture of the author Stuart Stirling
    haha.. nice bit of writin and advice there.. thanks!

    maybe the marketing methods aren't dead.. but the marketers themselves are.

    Stuart
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  • Profile picture of the author Gregg
    Helll… I thought you were serious….-
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    • Originally Posted by Gregg View Post

      Helll... I thought you were serious....-
      DANG, you mean I wasn't? You know, I gots to start postin more serious thangs cause I AM a very serious Thadder!

      That's pretty dag nab funny...

      Shuks.....maybe I can make enuf money to fix my truck, get momma outta prison, and get a head stone for my dog with this advise.
      What language speakin there son? I could barely understand ya! You might be wantin to get a little bit more edumacation cause yore spellin ain't the bestest!
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      Thaddaeus T. Hogg, The Hillbilly Marketeer
      http://www.hillbillymarketer.com
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  • Profile picture of the author tpw
    Re: Why in tarnation is everythang dead???

    If it is in decay, it must be dead, right?

    Good to see you in these parts, you old sheep herder...
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    Bill Platt, Oklahoma USA, PlattPublishing.com
    Publish Coloring Books for Profit (WSOTD 7-30-2015)
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    • Originally Posted by tpw View Post

      Re: Why in tarnation is everythang dead???

      If it is in decay, it must be dead, right?

      Good to see you in these parts, you old sheep herder...
      Bill, I done told ya to leave my sheeps alone! I had to get several a them critters into counseling since the lastest time ya visited!
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      Thaddaeus T. Hogg, The Hillbilly Marketeer
      http://www.hillbillymarketer.com
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