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Paging: Riley - The Hamster Loving Weirdo

by John Taylor
131 replies
Riley is forever bugging me. He's like an itch
you can't reach. Forever taking cheap shots
about Scotland and Malt Whisky.

Well, I've had enough, it's time to call out the
hamster loving weirdo. How can anyone with
a face that looks like a furball that's just been
puked up by a cat be taken seriously?

He doesn't know enough about marketing to
cover the back of a tiny postage stamp.

So, Riley.. here's the challenge..

We get together.. head to head on live radio.
You can fire all the lameass insults at me that
you want. BUT, you'd better be prepared to
answer some tough questions.

And get those eyebrows combed off your chin!

You up for this rumble Riley? Name the day!

John
#bev can't spell #disturbing images #hamster #irish can't make whisky #loving #not suitable for humans #paging #riley #spelt #weirdo #whisky
  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    John isn't there a reason Riley's in Japan and he only drinks the water down version of whiskey.

    I found a book that might help him, it's called "How to care for your hamster" only $9,999 today for Kevin as a special offer. Tomorrow it's back to it's normal price of $0.99
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Oh yes! A lowly haggis-breath calling out a Riley. This should be good for a laugh. I hope your momma raised a boy who doesn't cry too easily.

      I pick up your sheep-doo infested gauntlet and accept your ridiculous challenge.
      Signature
      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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      • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
        Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

        I pick up your sheep-doo infested gauntlet and accept your ridiculous challenge.
        Don't bend down too low, one of your over-amorous
        rodents might get the right idea.

        VegasVince's show was a kindergarten compared with
        what you've got coming.

        John
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        • Profile picture of the author Glenn Grundberg
          Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

          Don't bend down too low, one of your over-amorous
          rodents might get the right idea.

          VegasVince's show was a kindergarten compared with
          what you've got coming.

          John
          John, there's a much bigger problem here...

          Kev's neighbor just sent me this shot of his laundry line in his back yard...



          Never mind the hamsters...

          He's "bothering" the wildlife!

          hehehe:p
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          I'm Baaaaaack...
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      • Profile picture of the author Elmer Hurlstone
        This may be interesting.

        Two, ostensible, gentlemen-both likely down in their cups-battling it out on BTR.

        One a PLR master and the other "Mr. Original".

        Are there lessons to be learned and, if so, what are they?

        Methinks they may wish to employ a moderator with "kill button" capabilities.

        Elmer
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  • Profile picture of the author Dana_W
    I am SOOOOO there.

    I'm just happy this isn't going to be on USTream TV, because Kevin Riley in his mankini, and John Taylor in his kilt with a good gust of wind...

    Oh God. I'm going to go wash my brain out with soap right now.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by Dana_W View Post

      John Taylor in his kilt with a good gust of wind...
      Oh puhlease. Did you have to fill my mind with images of shriveled chicken giblets?
      Signature
      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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      • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
        Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

        Oh puhlease. Did you have to fill my mind with images of shriveled chicken giblets?
        It needs to be filled with something.. that little
        'ole amoebic brain cell is lonely! :p
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      • Profile picture of the author Frank Murphy
        Btw Mr Kevin, have your guinea pigs given birth already? :p
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        • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
          Originally Posted by misako View Post

          Btw Mr Kevin, have your guinea pigs given birth already? :p
          Have you not heard of the hamster infestations of Osaka? We had a population explosion at the labs, and now the streets of Osaka are awash with hamsters. Cars are at a standstill and even trains are being slowed down.
          Signature
          Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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          • Profile picture of the author Frank Murphy
            OMG! Really, i think i should book the next flight back to Japan to see if i can help stop the invasion!!!!
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            • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
              Originally Posted by misako View Post

              OMG! Really, i think i should book the next flight back to Japan to see if i can help stop the invasion!!!!
              It's too late. A pack of them was last seen streaming onto a Tokyo-bound Shinkansen.
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              Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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    • Profile picture of the author R Hagel
      Originally Posted by Dana_W View Post

      I am SOOOOO there.

      I'm just happy this isn't going to be on USTream TV, because Kevin Riley in his mankini, and John Taylor in his kilt with a good gust of wind...

      Oh God. I'm going to go wash my brain out with soap right now.
      Too bad you thought about it in permanent marker, eh?

      Cheers,
      Becky


      P.S. whiskEy
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  • Profile picture of the author Alexandre Valois
    Just so you all know, I predict the rebirth of mankinis for spring 2009.

    You read it here first!
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  • Profile picture of the author Dana_W
    http://www.maniacworld.com/hamster-dance.jpg

    Misako, I think you are already too late. Shortly after this secret photo of Kevin and his radioactive-waste-mutated hamster was snapped, the hamsters escaped and are raging through downtown Osaka as we speak.

    The carnage is devastating. THANKS, Kevin! You and your labs are more dangerous than Jimmy Neutron, and HE sent the world into a second ice age.
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    • Profile picture of the author Glenn Grundberg
      Originally Posted by Dana_W View Post

      http://www.maniacworld.com/hamster-dance.jpg

      Misako, I think you are already too late. Shortly after this secret photo of Kevin and his radioactive-waste-mutated hamster was snapped, the hamsters escaped and are raging through downtown Osaka as we speak.

      The carnage is devastating. THANKS, Kevin! You and your labs are more dangerous than Jimmy Neutron, and HE sent the world into a second ice age.
      That's...disturbing.

      Hey Riley- can I run the chat console for you guys? :p

      I promise not to editorialize too much...
      Signature

      I'm Baaaaaack...
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    • Profile picture of the author blogonator
      Originally Posted by Dana_W View Post

      http://www.maniacworld.com/hamster-dance.jpg

      Misako, I think you are already too late. Shortly after this secret photo of Kevin and his radioactive-waste-mutated hamster was snapped, the hamsters escaped and are raging through downtown Osaka as we speak.

      The carnage is devastating. THANKS, Kevin! You and your labs are more dangerous than Jimmy Neutron, and HE sent the world into a second ice age.
      Is that Kevin in a swinsuit? U gota kiddin me, dana? I think i m gona be sick
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      Hasta la WinVista, Baby!

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      • Profile picture of the author Dana_W
        Originally Posted by hidman View Post

        Is that Kevin in a swinsuit? U gota kiddin me, dana? I think i m gona be sick
        You've never seen the Kevin Riley Mankini photo?

        Now I can't find the link. Help me out here, people.
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        • Profile picture of the author Barbara Eyre
          Got my reminder set.

          Gonna have to pop down to the local ABC down the street and get some WHISKEY - Irish WHISKEY (I have more Irish blood in me than Scottish blood).

          Hmmmm, but I do have BOTH in me ... I won't know who to root for! :confused: hehe
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        • Profile picture of the author Peter Bestel
          Originally Posted by Dana_W View Post

          You've never seen the Kevin Riley Mankini photo?

          Now I can't find the link. Help me out here, people.
          Unfortunately I think all copies of that photo have been destroyed.

          As it happens, Kevin's been eating too much of his own recipes and it wasn't a true reflection of his current state of 'fitness' and John's been getting into the 'spirit' of his adopted homeland.

          So...





          Are you ready?







          Should be a fair bout methinks
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          • Profile picture of the author Richard Tunnah
            Originally Posted by Peter Bestel View Post

            Unfortunately I think all copies of that photo have been destroyed.

            As it happens, Kevin's been eating too much of his own recipes and it wasn't a true reflection of his current state of 'fitness' and John's been getting into the 'spirit' of his adopted homeland.

            So...





            Are you ready?







            Should be a fair bout methinks
            Good god Peter...did you have too?? That's my tea gone for a burton now!
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          • Profile picture of the author Scott Million
            Originally Posted by Peter Bestel View Post

            Unfortunately I think all copies of that photo have been destroyed.

            As it happens, Kevin's been eating too much of his own recipes and it wasn't a true reflection of his current state of 'fitness' and John's been getting into the 'spirit' of his adopted homeland.

            So...





            Are you ready?







            Should be a fair bout methinks
            ...lol.

            Will this be a blog talk radio showdown?
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          • Profile picture of the author Alex Sol
            Originally Posted by Peter Bestel View Post


            Are you ready?




            Should be a fair bout methinks
            Props for some mad PS skillz! :p:p
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          • Profile picture of the author Tom B
            Banned
            Originally Posted by Peter Bestel View Post








            Should be a fair bout methinks

            I keep waiting for something to drop from Taylor's kilt.
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            • Profile picture of the author Jared Alberghini
              Originally Posted by Thomas Belknap View Post

              I keep waiting for something to drop from Taylor's kilt.
              Ok Ok... I couldn't resist it Thomas... Sorry in advance JT :

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    • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
      Dana, Dana, Dana...
      radioactive-waste-mutated hamster
      Sheesh. Some people's kids...

      It's "Adolescent Radioactive Black Belt Hamsters." You're looking for the spin-off edition, "Adolescent Radioactive Black Belt Hamsters Massacre the Japanese Invasion."

      Really. Look it up. Kevin's probably got the whole run. In the same pile as his "New Kids on the Block" magazines.


      Paul
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      Stop by Paul's Pub - my little hangout on Facebook.

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      • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
        By the way, my money's on JT. For one thing, us iBOSS members have to stick together.

        Leaving aside such petty loyalties, Riley is an obvious fraud. Anyone who's ever run a real lab knows you use guinea pigs in them, not hamsters. Kevin probably couldn't tell a "standard" hamster from a Peruvian if you spotted him the rosettes.


        Paul

        PS: For the benefit of the heathen among us, that's "International Brotherhood of Old Scotch Swillers."
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        Stop by Paul's Pub - my little hangout on Facebook.

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        • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
          Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

          Riley is an obvious fraud. Anyone who's ever run a real lab knows you use guinea pigs in them, not hamsters. Kevin probably couldn't tell a "standard" hamster from a Peruvian if you spotted him the rosettes.
          Paul, you missed out an important fact, I have trademarked the term guinea pigs here on the Warrior Forum. :rolleyes:

          My money is also on John, I mean he's British do I need any other reason

          Bev
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        • Profile picture of the author David_Thompson
          Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

          Leaving aside such petty loyalties, Riley is an obvious fraud. Anyone who's ever run a real lab knows you use guinea pigs in them, not hamsters. Kevin probably couldn't tell a "standard" hamster from a Peruvian if you spotted him the rosettes.

          Paul
          Paul, maybe the hamster-man have bad eyesight or something
          and just couldn't tell the difference between guinea pigs and
          hamsters...or it could be one rodent is just like any other...lol

          --David
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        • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
          Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

          By the way, my money's on JT. For one thing, us iBOSS members have to stick together.

          Leaving aside such petty loyalties, Riley is an obvious fraud. Anyone who's ever run a real lab knows you use guinea pigs in them, not hamsters. Kevin probably couldn't tell a "standard" hamster from a Peruvian if you spotted him the rosettes.


          Paul

          PS: For the benefit of the heathen among us, that's "International Brotherhood of Old Scotch Swillers."
          Must be a Scot thing, this rampant lack of brain cells. I do feel sorry for you lot, not having been blessed with the brains and dashing good looks that Irish genetics bring to the table.

          Hamsters have been used in numerous lab experiments of late. All part of budget cuts, which I would expect a pair of skinflint Scots to hold dear to their cold hearts.
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          Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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          • Profile picture of the author David_Thompson
            Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

            Must be a Scot thing, this rampant lack of brain cells. I do feel sorry for you lot, not having been blessed with the brains and dashing good looks that Irish genetics bring to the table.

            Hamsters have been used in numerous lab experiments of late. All part of budget cuts, which I would expect a pair of skinflint Scots to hold dear to their cold hearts.
            I was just wondering when you would show up....

            Can't let the Scots give you sticks like that...LOL

            --David
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          • Profile picture of the author Jonathan Heusman
            Obviously the Scots have been drinking a wee bit too much Whiskey. No wonder you guys are always chasing small men dressed in green at the end of rainbows. Or wait, is that the Irish? Nevermind...
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  • Profile picture of the author Peter Bestel
    Now THIS is what this forum is all about!

    Let it be a fair fight, with no hair-pulling, biting, scratching, name-calling... awe, who am I kidding, go for it fellas and may the winner be whoever can spell whisky correctly.
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  • Profile picture of the author Ken Leatherman
    Oh Man! I can't wait for this battle to begin. It's going to be the best shootout since the O.K. Corral or better yet High Noon.

    John would be Cary Grant in High Noon and Riley the leader of the Clanton gang. err make that the hamster gang.

    Can't you just see what Dana described on the streets of Laredo make that Tokyo.

    Ken
    The Old Geezer
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    At least Peter they both speak proper English and say niche and not nitch. The only disagreement with spelling is whisky and whiskey.

    Give Riley some white wine and he is putty in your hands.

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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by Bev Clement View Post


      Give Riley some white wine and he is putty in your hands.
      Yuck. That's only good for invalids and wee children.
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      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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  • Profile picture of the author Mike McBride
    Riley is forever bugging me. He's like an itch
    you can't reach. Forever taking cheap shots
    about Scotland and Malt Whisky.
    OK, I'm confused - what's wrong with Malt Whisky?
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    • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
      Originally Posted by Mike McBride View Post

      OK, I'm confused - what's wrong with Malt Whisky?
      Absolutely nothing Mike. It's Riley who's
      confused, he takes shots at the spelling
      of Whisky... instead of taking shots OF
      Whisky.

      John
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    Mike, Riley always says Whiskey is better.

    Whisky = brewed in Scotland

    Whiskey = brewed anywhere but Scotland
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by Bev Clement View Post


      Whiskey = brewed anywhere but Scotland
      Not anywhere. It must be brewed in the only country that knows how to both create drops of pure nectar and enjoy them - Ireland.
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      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    OK, Riley has checked his diary and although
    it's full of flower arranging and knitting classes,
    he found a one hour slot:
    Free Online Radio - Internet Talk Radio | BlogTalkRadio

    John
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

      OK, Riley has checked his diary and although
      it's full of flower arranging and knitting classes,
      he found a one hour slot:
      Free Online Radio - Internet Talk Radio | BlogTalkRadio

      John
      Great. I'll bury my knitting needles in your thick skull, you porridge-swilling, chicken-squeezing, skirt-wearing, sheep molester.
      Signature
      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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      • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
        Is that the best you can do Riley?

        Snivelling about like a wee unwashed rodent, infesting
        the dark and dirty corners.

        Be a man.. venture outside and get to know your local
        flock.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kim Standerline
    Well I've set my reminder lol

    This should be fun (she says ordering popcorn and WHISKY)
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  • Profile picture of the author RobinSkeen
    I'm assuming that the 6:00 p.m. time is MY local time? I don't want to miss this. Stocking up the popcorn and Whiskey.
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  • Profile picture of the author ExRat
    Hi,



    SPLORF!

    Look at the state of the tags -
    hamster, loving, paging, riley, weirdo
    At last, a useful, sensible, on-topic thread.

    PMSL here.
    Signature


    Roger Davis
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  • Profile picture of the author R Hagel
    Ah, thanks for pointing that out, Roger. The tag list was incomplete, so I added one.

    Cheers,
    Becky
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    • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
      Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

      Have you not heard of the hamster infestations of Osaka? We had a population explosion at the labs, and now the streets of Osaka are awash with hamsters. Cars are at a standstill and even trains are being slowed down.
      I'm on my way to the rescue with a tanker of barbecue sauce in tow. I just hope the whiskey holds out until I get there...
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  • Profile picture of the author Mike McBride
    Hmm ... this thread reminds me of the old joke:

    An Irishman and a Scot walk out of a pub...
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    Becky you spelt it incorrectly, it's WHISKY
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    • Profile picture of the author R Hagel
      Originally Posted by Bev Clement View Post

      Becky you spelt it incorrectly, it's WHISKY[/SIZE]

      Like I'm going to take spelling lessons from the person who spelled two words wrong in one sentence.

      (And Bev -- check the tags on this post now. )


      cheers,
      Becky

      p.s. I second what Kim said -- I lose a little lunch every time someone quotes and reposts the pics. It's no longer a mankini to me, it's a IJustTossedMyCookinis.
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      • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
        Originally Posted by R Hagel View Post

        Like I'm going to take spelling lessons from the person who spelled two words wrong in one sentence.

        (And Bev -- check the tags on this post now. )


        cheers,
        Becky

        p.s. I second what Kim said -- I lose a little lunch every time someone quotes and reposts the pics. It's no longer a mankini to me, it's a IJustTossedMyCookinis.
        I know I added the correct spelling to the tags.

        BTW spelt is correct if you use British English
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        • Profile picture of the author Nightengale
          ROFL! My stomach hurts... Thanks for the entertainment!

          Michelle

          The photo of Riley IS awful though...
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          • Profile picture of the author Chris W. Sutton
            You have GOT to be kidding me! Kevin Riley and John Taylor together on one show? That will be like watching paint dry! Neither one of them have a brain the size of a piss ant!

            Let's up the ante a little bit and do something exciting. Make it like the olympics. Here are my predictions on who will win what...

            Best Judy Garland Soundalike - John Taylor hands down

            Best-Looking in a Mankini - Neither

            Best English Speaker - Kevin Riley (John doesn't)

            Best Pub Brawler - hmmmm... I have to give John the edge on that one

            Best Allen Says Brown Noser - Ooooooh, that is a really difficult one because they are both great at it but I will give the edge to Kevin

            Best Joke Teller - Definitely John

            Best Looking in a Kilt - Ummm, NEITHER

            One With the Best Saying About Wives - Oh, definitely John Taylor

            The Toughest - Draw... neither one of them could whoop Olive Oyl with one hand tied behind her back

            Who would win if they were having a fight, riding a donkey that jumped off a very high cliff? The rest of the Warrior Forum!
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  • Profile picture of the author CanuckMike
    This looks just fantastic. Are these recorded? I don't want to miss it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Kim Standerline
    OMG

    Do u mind, I just had my tea
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  • Profile picture of the author RobinSkeen
    That was utterly gross. Thanks for uploading THAT into my brain. I have to scald it with hot water now.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dana_W
      Originally Posted by RobinSkeen View Post

      That was utterly gross. Thanks for uploading THAT into my brain. I have to scald it with hot water now.
      Bleach might work. I plan to try.
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  • Profile picture of the author Richard Tunnah
    Does this come with free popcorn for listeners??
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    Now we know where Riley keeps his sweaty socks and
    it's not under the hat.
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    Do you think Riley's worked out that he's going to
    have to get his lazy ass out of bed at 7am on a
    Saturday morning?

    John
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    • Profile picture of the author Jim M
      Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

      Do you think Riley's worked out that he's going to
      have to get his lazy ass out of bed at 7am on a
      Saturday morning?

      John

      I hope you have fun...........

      I'm getting my lazy ass out of bed at 6am on Saturday morning..........

      and going to Florida for a week........YEEE HAAA
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      • Profile picture of the author KarlWarren
        I feel really bad...

        I didn't know what I'd started when I leaked the Riley Mankini pic that he insisted on sending me when I ordered one of his products. What disturbs me most is that there are MORE of them, and this time he's waxed all his body hair off?!?!?!

        Dana... I still have the pic, but I'm frightened now - I'm not sure where this will all end. Kevin seems to be taking these pics all over the place, I think he's grown quite partial to this particular garment.

        Anyways... as the evidence shows, Kevin has overindulged over Christmas - time to kick the hamsters off the treadmill and jump on there yourself Mr Riley

        Before Xmas:



        After Xmas:


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  • Profile picture of the author Dana_W
    I can't look. Tell me when it's safe to look again.

    Kevin Riley, for the love of all that's holy, do some sit ups.

    John - stop being so in touch with your inner Scott and put on some pants before a good strong wind sweeps by and the WF gets to know you WAAAAY better then we intended.
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  • Profile picture of the author Ken Leatherman
    My Wife just puked down my shirt collar and fell dead in a faint. I hope we have video of this event. Me I'm ROTFLMBO.

    I swear I'm not going to miss it like I did Vegas Vince. Give me the link so I can go listen to it please.

    Ken Leatherman
    The Old Geezer

    Now my picture should return you to sanity and you won't even have to use bleach.
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    • Profile picture of the author Rod Cortez
      <Grabs a bag of popcorn, picks up the phone and calls Dana White of the UFC to tell him to add Riley vs. Taylor to Saturday's MMA fight line up>

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      • Profile picture of the author kf
        What time zone is the 3:00 PM time that is listed?

        Being of Scottish Irish descent my wee self, I would like a fighting chance of listening in.
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        • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
          Originally Posted by kf View Post

          What time zone is the 3:00 PM time that is listed?

          Being of Scottish Irish descent my wee self, I would like a fighting chance of listening in.
          You're in Victoria I see. My old stomping grounds. Went to Camosun in the 80s.

          Obviously, you'll have to support the Irish-Canadian-Swiss-Japanese side on this.
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          Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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          • Profile picture of the author kf
            Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

            You're in Victoria I see. My old stomping grounds. Went to Camosun in the 80s.

            Obviously, you'll have to support the Irish-Canadian-Swiss-Japanese side on this.
            Kevin - I'll tell you Victoria is a great place to be while the rest of Canada is in a deep-freeze.

            And I'll be happy to be entirely global and schizophrenic with my support of sides (be it kilts, whiskey or hampsters) *if* I can figure out the time zone.

            Anyone know what time zone is the 3:00 pm listed for?
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            • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
              Originally Posted by kf View Post

              Kevin - I'll tell you Victoria is a great place to be while the rest of Canada is in a deep-freeze.
              Yup. Always enjoyed it when we tortured the Torontonians with the annual flower count.

              Anyone know what time zone is the 3:00 pm listed for?
              I believe that be PST. BTR goes by your computer clock.
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              • Profile picture of the author kf
                Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

                Y


                BTR goes by your computer clock.
                Thanks!

                Let the games begin ...

                Uh, Karl - these photographs are really disturbing. Ewwwww. (And I *didn't* mean 'ewe'!!!)
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  • Profile picture of the author Kim Standerline
    Mother of God

    Please will people stop quoting with that dreadful foto
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    • Profile picture of the author Scott Million
      Originally Posted by Kim Standerline View Post

      Mother of God
      Hahaha...priceless...you're just reading along and then BAM!

      ...classic.
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    • Profile picture of the author Peter Bestel
      Originally Posted by Kim Standerline View Post

      Mother of God

      Please will people stop quoting with that dreadful foto
      Kim, I posted the thing and I agree.
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    • Profile picture of the author Ken Strong
      Originally Posted by Kim Standerline View Post

      Mother of God

      Please will people stop quoting with that dreadful foto
      LOL -- I was just about to say... once wasn't bad enough? Six or seven times...
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    • Profile picture of the author Thaddaeus T. Hogg
      Shewt Miz Bev, wudn't nobody want to be a referrin thut thar showdown cause yew jest wudn't be able to understand a dadgum thing they said. Taint neither one a them thar boys speak nary a word a English.

      Sides, I gots a feelin thut neither feller wears any underdrawers an I shore don't wanna be a seein any of thut thar stuff. An even iffin any folk wus a wantin to see Mr. Riley underdrawerless, yewd have to have one a thum thar tellie photo lenses jest to see anythin!

      Thut thar photo shore makes him look like he's the big boar in woods but, actually Miz Bev, thut thar is where he keeps his purse!
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    I've got some killer questions for the hamster
    lover, but if you've always wanted to ask
    Riley a question.. let me know and I'll try to
    slot a few of your questions into the show.

    Let's put the bearded lady on the spot.. he
    deserves to be flame grilled!


    John
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    Chris are you going to be the referee for this one? I mean you always understand proper English and John & Kevin speak the same language except for whisky/whiskey.

    That would make for an interesting programme with you moderating the chat there
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  • Profile picture of the author Adam Jackson
    OMG....sory I dont tyep so wel wihtout beign able too se tha keyobard. Teh picutres haev bunrt my eyse.

    Cat'n wait to hera thsi shwo.

    Adma
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  • Profile picture of the author Alice Seba
    LOL...now the tags are:

    bev can't spell, hamster, irish can't make whisky, loving, paging, riley, spelt, weirdo, whiskey, whisky
    By the way, hamsters smell funny. I'd need a lot of Canadian WHISKEY to hang out with those creatures.

    Alice
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    • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
      Bev,

      TM? Pfeh! Them's intellectual property issues. Don't you know they don't matter here?!

      And yes, you do need more of a reason than that... One that's correct would work, for starters. JT ain't a Brit, he's a Scot!


      David,

      Eyesight? The real problem is that Riley sees anything that has as much of its face covered with hair as his as a compatible life-form.

      We'll leave the definition of "compatible" to others to discuss. But, just as a friendly warning, I wouldn't turn my back on him if I were you...


      Paul
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      • Profile picture of the author David_Thompson
        Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

        Bev,

        TM? Pfeh! Them's intellectual property issues. Don't you know they don't matter here?!

        And yes, you do need more of a reason than that... One that's correct would work, for starters. JT ain't a Brit, he's a Scot!


        David,

        Eyesight? The real problem is that Riley sees anything that has as much of its face covered with hair as his as a compatible life-form.

        We'll leave the definition of "compatible" to others to discuss. But, just as a friendly warning, I wouldn't turn my back on him if I were you...


        Paul
        Paul so I guess it's keep your back to the walls at all times, eh...

        --David
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        • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
          David,
          I guess it's keep your back to the walls at all times, eh...
          Yup.

          Short hair, you have to worry about Riley. If you have dreads, JT might be the concern.

          Mid-length, maybe Mary Poppi... err... Bev is the ... ummm... Shutting up now.


          Paul
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          • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
            Kevin,

            Sorry, but I have no Scottish in my ancestry. My paternal grandmother was named Weller, though, which you should recognize as a good Irish name. Parents from County Kilkenny.

            It took a while, but she eventually forgave me for preferring Glenlivet to Jameson. I suspect she rolled over in her grave this weekend when I cracked open a bottle of Laphroaig.

            I have more family from David's part of the world than from Ireland, though. Half Swedish. Before he changed it, my great-(maybe twice)-grandfather's name was Frissiov Sigismund Johansson.

            You will be glad to hear that there's not a single hamster in my family tree.


            Paul
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            • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
              Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post


              It took a while, but she eventually forgave me for preferring Glenlivet to Jameson.
              OMG, you have no taste, you poor sad blighter. Although, I won't turn away a glass of Glenlivet.

              Actually, since I have drank Old Crow and Corn Whiskey with that James Allen character, I guess you could say I never turn down anything that even comes close to resembling Whiskey.
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              • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
                Bev,

                I'll leave it to John to argue (or not) about his servitude to Her Majesty, Prince Charles. He may not wish to, given Camilla's resemblance to a pure-blood Merino.

                BTW, that's a squirrel on the treadmill, not a hamster. You're clearly as near-sighted as Kevin...


                Paul
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                • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
                  Kevin,

                  That last paragraph of that last post would have been almost correct, had you finished just before "that even comes close to resembling Whiskey."


                  Paul
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                • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
                  Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                  Bev,

                  I'll leave it to John to argue (or not) about his servitude to Her Majesty, Prince Charles. He may not wish to, given Camilla's resemblance to a pure-blood Merino.

                  BTW, that's a squirrel on the treadmill, not a hamster. You're clearly as near-sighted as Kevin...


                  Paul
                  Her Majesty, Prince Charles. That has to be a first Camilla now that someone I haven't heard of since leaving the UK, or was that one of the reasons for leaving the UK :rolleyes:

                  I know it's a squirrel, someone didn't have the heart to let Kevin know, we thought it would confuse him to have to know what the difference was.

                  Back to the radio show, John will give Riley lots of aggro as only a Brit and can do. But, he might be a gentleman and say that Kevin is being "beastly."

                  Kevin will you stop talking a load of cobblers please.

                  Best of British to you John, don't let the side down.

                  As well as discussing whisky you both could talk about faggots and how you eat them for dinner.

                  Ok. I'm going now before you tell me to get lost.
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              • Profile picture of the author Jonathan Heusman
                One of my favorite all time movie quotes...

                "I'll have a scotch on the rocks, please. Any scotch will do... as long as it's not a blend, of course... Single malt, Glen Livet, Glen Galley, perhaps... any glen will do.

                Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

                OMG, you have no taste, you poor sad blighter. Although, I won't turn away a glass of Glenlivet.

                Actually, since I have drank Old Crow and Corn Whiskey with that James Allen character, I guess you could say I never turn down anything that even comes close to resembling Whiskey.
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                • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
                  Kevin,
                  I won't turn away a glass of Glenlivet.
                  Well, you may be a deviant and a fraud, but you're clearly not a fool...


                  Paul
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                  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
                    Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                    Kevin,

                    Well, you may be a deviant and a fraud, but you're clearly not a fool...

                    Paul
                    Mmm, the jury's still out on the last one.

                    John
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                    • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
                      John,
                      Mmm, the jury's still out on the last one.
                      He gets a trial? Since when?


                      Paul
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                      • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
                        Paul,

                        Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                        John,He gets a trial? Since when?

                        Paul
                        Well he was given the right to remain silent but that didn't work!

                        John
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                        • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
                          Well he was given the right to remain silent but that didn't work!
                          ...

                          ...

                          ...

                          [tap] [tap] [tap]

                          ...

                          [nod]

                          [click]
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                          Stop by Paul's Pub - my little hangout on Facebook.

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      • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
        Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

        Bev,

        And yes, you do need more of a reason than that... One that's correct would work, for starters. JT ain't a Brit, he's a Scot!

        Paul
        That means I was right. JT is a Brit as he's a Scot. Now I would have be wrong if I called him English. I would say I'm a Brit even though I'm Welsh. We don't mind being called Brits, just don't call us English :p
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  • Profile picture of the author David_Thompson
    That's one scary looking picture man, this will scar the kids
    on the forum for life...lol

    --David
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    It's not my fault, Vegas Vince made me do it :p













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    • Profile picture of the author Richard Tunnah
      Originally Posted by Bev Clement View Post

      It's not my fault, Vegas Vince made me do it :p
      I thought the top one was me Bev...but realised the hats were the wrong way round!
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  • Profile picture of the author Maria Gudelis
    ROFL!!! What a mankini! Couldn't resist - the karate kid hamster invaded Riley's body:

    YouTube - SMACKDOWN of the Century - Rumble of Kevin Riley vs John Taylor...Who Will Win?
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by Maria Gudelis View Post

      ROFL!!! What a mankini! Couldn't resist - the karate kid hamster invaded Riley's body:

      YouTube - SMACKDOWN of the Century - Rumble of Kevin Riley vs John Taylor...Who Will Win?
      Phew. I'm glad I don't suffer from epilepsy. As it is, I think my eyeballs went into seizure.

      Medic! I need a Whiskey, pronto!
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      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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      • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
        Originally Posted by David_Thompson View Post

        Paul, maybe the hamster-man have bad eyesight or something
        and just couldn't tell the difference between guinea pigs and
        hamsters...or it could be one rodent is just like any other...lol

        --David
        Guinea pigs have a lot more meat on them, but hamsters tend to be more tender...

        Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

        Must be a Scot thing, this rampant lack of brain cells. I do feel sorry for you lot, not having been blessed with the brains and dashing good looks that Irish genetics bring to the table.

        Hamsters have been used in numerous lab experiments of late. All part of budget cuts, which I would expect a pair of skinflint Scots to hold dear to their cold hearts.
        Kevin, I'll root for you in the Smackdown, with a wee glass of Wild Turkey and an iced spring water back... It's too bad the rest of the world can only be Irish one day a year.

        And as a McCabe born on St. Pat's own day, I won't even turn down a cold green beer on that day...
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  • Profile picture of the author Diego Hernando
    This is what we do around here with the hamster cousin:

    http://educasitios.educ.ar/grupo1063...b5446197fb.jpg
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    This time tomorrow night Riley will be skulking
    in a corner licking his wounds.

    John
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

      This time tomorrow night Riley will be skulking
      in a corner licking his wounds.

      John
      More likely, I'll be sitting here drinking to your demise.
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      • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
        Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

        More likely, I'll be sitting here drinking
        ..through a straw. :p
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        • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
          Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

          ..through a straw. :p
          At least I don't have to eat my meals through a straw, you toothless old dog.
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          Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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          • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
            Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

            At least I don't have to eat my meals through a straw, you toothless old dog.
            I already told you I have a full set of teeth...

            ..they're in the glass on the table next to my bed

            Bring it on Riley!
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  • Profile picture of the author KathyK
    Well, well, a battle between the Scots and the Irish.

    Being a bit of both, I'll just have to pull out a bottle of whisky and a bottle of whiskey and drink to the best points each of you make.

    May the best man win.
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    Kathy

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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by KathyK View Post


      May the best man win.
      Thank you. Since we're not even sure if Taylor is a man, I take it you mean moi.
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      • Profile picture of the author Ken Strong
        Originally Posted by Kevin Riley View Post

        Thank you. Since we're not even sure if Taylor is a man, I take it you mean moi.
        Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh! He speaks French!
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        • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
          Originally Posted by KenStrong View Post

          Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh! He speaks French!
          Just one of the many talents. Wait until I bamboozle that old fogey with my Italian, Korean, Papau New Guinean, and a little known dialect used in one small village in Lower Rawalpindi.
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          Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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          • Profile picture of the author Michael Mayo
            Well I was going to stay out of this because I sporfed my beer on the
            screen/keyboard but, I'm of Irish decent so I'll place my bet on whom
            ever can drink the most Moonshine. Yes, here in Kentucky we've perfected it.

            I've learned that only wimps drink whiskey or whisky....Peu.
            (It's like having a watered down beer!)

            Yes, we produce it here but, it's only for the wimps that can't handle the
            real stuff.(ie, MoonShine)

            I'll watch this brawl as long as I don't have to pay a dollar only to find
            you two nuts charge me a recurring 47 dollars after the fight is over.

            Sorry, some one pissed in my Wheaties today!...lol

            Have a Great Day and Good luck to you both!
            Should be Interestring!
            -Michael
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            • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
              Originally Posted by Michael Mayo View Post


              Yes, we produce it here but, it's only for the wimps that can't handle the
              real stuff.(ie, MoonShine)
              I had some horrid corn whiskey with that low-bred James Allen. He tries to outdo himself for bringing the worst possible rotgut every time he comes to visit.

              All I can say is, I may not be a wimp as I drank the swill, but I wouldn't go out of my way to prove it by drinking that bilgewater too often.
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              Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    Riley,

    Shouldn't you be getting into shape ready for the show, you
    flabby, hairy dipstick?

    It's a good job it isn't being shown on uStream you don't have
    time to get all that makeup applied. :p
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    • Profile picture of the author VegasVince
      This fight is a tough pick for Vinnie. Hard to handicap. Hard to pick a clear winner.

      It's experience vs. youth.

      The odds in Las Vegas for Taylor vs. Riley.... are still "even money." I haven't figured out where the wise guy money is going yet.....so the fix definitely aint in.

      John Taylor....is the wiley, cagey, grizzled veteran who has managed to out live 48 American Presidents....and never seems to get "old."

      Tough to bet against an old ******* that never dies...especially if he has a couple of shots in him before the fight. But have years of drinking and hanging with young party chicks taken there toll on this once great champion? Or does he have on final last hurah in him?

      Then there's the younger, faster, quicker.....Kevin Riley. Inexperienced...but hungry.

      Riley...is a dude who has trained with the Yakuza....and some Geisha Girls who have more "kung fu moves" then the Karate Kid times ten.

      They can kick ass and strip a dude of his rolex watch faster then the speed of light....and Riley has been learning the tricks of the trade from them.

      Riley has been training hard in the bath houses...so he's definitely ready to take the title from Taylor.

      It's experience vs. youth.

      Tough call for Vinny here....but I'm droppin' 5 grand on John Taylor.....assuming he shows up sober.

      I think he can out hustle the younger man and beat him...just like he's beaten Father Friggin' Time for like the past 217 years.

      My pick: John Taylor by 7 round tko.


      xxx Vegas Vince
      Legend.
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    Secret sources have revealed that Riley travelled
    to the UK by Jumbo Jet (He can't get in anything
    smaller) recently to attempt to sabotage Taylor's
    internet access.

    This half hearted and ill conceived attempt came
    to our attention when it was discovered that Riley
    had been on a hamster raiding frenzy as reported
    in the Daily Mail:
    And the big breaking news story on the BBC is... a stolen hamster | Mail Online

    Just how low will this mankini wearing weirdo go?

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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Only 8 1/2 more hours until I put Taylor on a spit and roast him. I'd sell slices of him on a bun, but nobody wants tough old cuts like that.

      Come join me for the weenie roast (well, there's something under that kilt I think) at:

      Free Online Radio - Internet Talk Radio | BlogTalkRadio

      PS: Just how dense is Taylor? He told me he's getting beauty sleep before our radio show. As if that would help him anyway.
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    Beauty sleep?

    I think you've been overdoing the ugly sleep! :p
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  • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
    Show starts in 15 minutes:
    http://www.blogtalkradio.com/John-Ta...r-Radio-Rumble

    John
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    • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
      Originally Posted by John Taylor View Post

      I'm there John, but I ain't puttin any money on this thing because somethin
      tells me that somebody's gonna take a dive.
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      • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
        Round 1

        Was kind of slow. John got a few good shots at Kevin and he got a couple
        back, but it was a slow round.

        John takes the round 3 to 2

        Round 2

        The fighters really came out swinging with sheep and all kinds of weird
        animals with Kevin taking on the whole world with his dinner plans for 6
        marketers.

        Kevin takes the round 8 to 6

        Round 3

        Kevin continued with the quick jabs at John's solar plexus and face. John
        made a comment about Kevin's mags. Kevin shot back about John's
        drinking. The round actually ended rather slow with the fighters trying
        to show their smarts. John got in a plug for the WF.

        Kevin takes round 2 to 1

        Round 4

        The fighters starting talking about marketing models. Now we're getting
        somewhere. The fighters seemed to be feeling each other out at this
        point in the bout. Kevin did most of the talking with John carefully waiting
        for an opening. No punches were thrown. The fans started to get
        restless waiting for the brawl to begin.

        Draw at 0 to 0

        Round 5

        John began the round talking about what he likes to do with his business.
        He came up with some good tips on how to change over from an Adsense
        model to either CPA or building your list depending on how well the
        Adsense was going. Kevin got another shot on John being cheap. First
        punch thrown in a while. And then the punches started, but quickly died
        down. It was obvious the fighters were getting tired.

        John takes round 2 to 1

        Round 6

        Kevin began talking about tools for his business such as Snagit and stuff
        that he couldn't live without. He, of course, had to give Google a plug. He
        must be on the payroll. Oh and a plug for Amazon too. Me thinks I smell
        payola here. Then there was the plug for Camtasia, which is one heck of
        a piece of software. I agree. In the meantime, John is nowhere to be
        seen here as Kevin dominates the round just with his presence.

        Kevin takes round 1 to 0

        Round 7

        While I waited forJohn to get back into this fight, I was starting to think
        that he was about to lay down. But then he comes out swinging on Kevin's
        looks. Kevin fires back a few shots. John fires back dragging Elmer
        Hurlstone into the fight. Elmer escaped with only minor bruises. The judges
        had trouble scoring this round with all the misdirection going on. But
        Kevin's great shot about Scots being miserable took the round.

        Kevin takes round 3 to 2

        Round 8

        Kevin came out swinging but John fired right back. Kevin seemed stunned
        as he couldn't even follow the next question. John was back in the fight.
        Would he move in for the kill or would he let Kevin wiggle his way back in?
        John came out with some great philosophy on getting as many buy now
        buttons as you can out there.

        John takes round 2 to 1

        Round 9

        Kevin comes out swinging attacking the sheep again. He then gets another
        subtle shot on fish. John never saw it coming. Kevin then did his rope a
        dope ala Ali talking about lakes and something else that nobody could
        follow, including John who was probably quite inebriated by this point in
        time. Yet, he came out with some more great tips on sales before he
        went off on a tangent that escaped even the judges. :confused:

        Round was a draw at 2 to 2

        Round 10

        John comes out with two brutal right jabs sensing he was behind in the
        fight. He confused Kevin with his list building question since Kevin's
        grocery list was most on his mind sensing he was out of sushi for him and
        hamster food for his rodents. Kevin started to stutter. John was ready to
        move in for the kill as we moved into the last few minutes of the fight.

        John takes round 2 to 0

        Round 11

        It's anybody's fight with only 5 minutes to go. The fighters were tired but
        John was getting his second wind. Kevin was running out of stuff to say.
        That was John's game plan all along. Let Kevin talk himself into oblivion.
        It was working. The fans were waiting for just one of the fighters to land
        one last blow to win this fight. But nobody could seem to get an edge
        here. Would it end in a draw?

        And then Kevin took the dive revealing the deep dark hidden secret about
        the fish store. OH KEVIN WHY????

        All John had to do now was just hold on for 2 minutes. Kevin was grasping
        for a way to pull this one out. So he went back to talking about turning
        around your marketing once you've screwed up. He seemed to be making
        some progress. John let him talk. With a minute left, John took the final
        shot calling Kevin a complete weirdo.

        John Takes round 2 to 0

        Final fight tally


        John Taylor 22
        Kevin Riley 20

        The old man river wins it!!!!

        Kevin, your hamsters are crying in their feed.
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        • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
          Originally Posted by Steven Wagenheim View Post


          The old man river wins it!!!!

          Kevin, your hamsters are crying in their feed.
          It was a tough decision for me to let that toothless old dog win, but his off-air threat to send a truckload of haggis to my house - delivered by his gruesome family members who would be waving their kilts at us - led to me taking a dive.
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          Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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          • Profile picture of the author Elmer Hurlstone
            Having listened to Messrs. Taylor and Riley in real time as they attempted to, briefly, out insult each other I would be forced to call the match a draw.

            They accused each other of an inability to spell the word "whiskey"/"whisky" properly and traded the odd barb regarding clothing style and preference.

            There were also a couple comments relative to animal husbandry.

            I've known both John Taylor and Kevin Riley for quite some time and have, on occasion, done a bit of editing/proofreading for each. When it comes to proper spelling neither has a leg to stand on.

            As to their personal dress style, let's face it; both of these guys are home bound marketers. In all likelihood they rarely wear anything more formal than raggedy bath robes, well worn jeans or beyond-their-time weird-print boxers.

            Once they got past the obligatory nonsense they, seriously, talked marketing.

            And that is where the value lies. Riley and Taylor each bring a great deal to the table.

            It's a good table to sit to when they're talking.

            Grab the link from one of the preceding posts and take a listen.

            You'll find it's time well spent.

            Elmer Hurlstone
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            • Profile picture of the author RobinSkeen
              I missed it!!!!

              Listening to the recording. Not the same. LOL
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              • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
                Steven,
                The old man river wins it!!!!
                But of course. I picked JT before the line.

                Old age and treachery (especially when fueled by a good single malt) will beat youth and enthusiasm every time.


                Paul
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                Stop by Paul's Pub - my little hangout on Facebook.

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                • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
                  Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                  Steven,But of course. I picked JT before the line.

                  Old age and treachery (especially when fueled by a good single malt) will beat youth and enthusiasm every time.


                  Paul
                  We shall see. I have backup. Once these guys get up his kilt, the old bugger'll be singing a different tune.

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                  Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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                  • Profile picture of the author Chris W. Sutton
                    I knew all along that the Doctor would win because he delivers a wicked rendition of "Over the Rainbow" that even Judy Garland couldn't top!
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  • Profile picture of the author Johnsoncm
    Banned
    [DELETED]
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    • Profile picture of the author Kevin Riley
      Originally Posted by Johnsoncm View Post

      Wow, I saw those photos about ten minutes ago, and my brain just started remembering how to form coherent thoughts again. Scary.
      I once saw a photo of Taylor where a sudden gust had blown his skirt up (Think ugly Marilyn Monroe) and I still have a hard time form coherent thoughts.
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      Kevin Riley, long-time Warrior living in Osaka, Japan

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  • Profile picture of the author warner444


    I came across this Hamster picture today on a news blog, it was all written in Japanese, except for the words Kevin Riley. I'm a little concerned.
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