Can you critique my squeeze page?

by Justin Toner

Posted: 12 years ago 16 replies

INTERNET MARKETING

Hi warriors,

I have a squeeze page up and running for about 3 weeks now and it is getting people to sign up and has generated some sales.

I would love to hear some 'constructive criticism' to the page itself with respect to all aspects of it - text, layout, image, colour etc...

I'd greatly appreciate all experienced opinions of changes that you feel I should make that potentially would increase sign ups.

I am aware that the best thing to do is split test, and split test ... so this is why I am asking for your advice.

Here's the page:
www.MindAndBodyWeightLoss.com

Thanks...

justin

#critique #page #squeeze

harrydog

12 years ago

Hi Justin
the link in your post doesn't work. the one in your signature works, better check it out
cheers
Mark

Thanks
1 reply

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harrydog

12 years ago

Hi Justin
having looked at the page (through your sig link) here is some honest feedback
Please note I am no expert in this just giving my honest opinion

Firstly you are in a very competitive niche and if you look at some of the squeeze pages for this type of product they are very well designed and put together.
1) The page looks slightly amateurish - you can get pretty good squeeze page templates for free or very cheap
2) There is no consistency with the colours used in all the header and text
3) Your headline may do with re doing to grab more attention. There is no highlighting on your keywords
4) Why are you only asking for the e mail address - this means you cant personalise the follow up e mails
5) I would look at having some form of Video on there (Short though)
6) there is no call to action on your opt in box with some form of arrow graphics something like "Grab your Free report on the 7 Secrets before its taken down"

If you look at the squeeze page I am developing (see my sig) I am trying to incorporate some of the elements I have mentioned - NB this is not finished yet work in progress.
Hope this helps
mark

[ 1 ] Thanks
2 replies

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Justin Toner 12 years ago

Hey Mark,

Thanks for your reply - I really appreciate it.
I know for sure it can be improved upon, but wasn't sure about what improvements to do.
The fog is now lifting - nice one!!
- Thanks
Signature

FREE Weight Loss eBook
www.MindAndBodyWeightLoss.com
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Shaun OReilly

12 years ago

Here's some feedback on your squeeze page...

1. Banner

The banner is the first thing that my eye was drawn
to, instead of your headline.

In addition, the banner doesn't really communicate
the benefits of what you're offering.

I'd test removing the banner completely.

2. Headline

The current headline isn't particularly strong.

You need to have a headline that stops people in their
tracks and gets them to read the rest of the page.

Your banner is taking away attention from your headline.

3. Benefits

To get people to sign-up to your list you need to provide
people with benefits, benefits and more benefits.

There are NO bullets on your opt-in page to provide
people with an idea of what compelling things they'll
get by signing-up to join your list.

4. Colors

There are too many colors on your page and they're
not well co-ordinated either. So far you've got red,
blue, teal, black and a lighter teal background.

It's a good design practice to use two or three dominant
colors on your site that co-ordinate well together.

I'd definitely test having a plain white background as the
light teal looks out of place (IMO) and detracts from the
rest of the elements on the page.

5. Sign-up Box

I see that you're using the javascript code from AWeber
rather than the raw HTML version.

Note: If your visitor has javascript turned off on their
browser - then your sign-up form won't show up at all.

Use the raw HTML code from AWeber instead so you
have more control over your form and it'll show on all
browser settings.

Also, remove the visible hyperlinks to AWeber in the
web form itself.

I like simple, focused squeeze pages rather than going
too fancy on graphics and colors etc.

Dedicated to mutual success,

Shaun

[ 1 ] Thanks
2 replies

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Derek Soto

12 years ago

Originally Posted by Shaun OReilly

Here's some feedback on your squeeze page...

1. Banner

The banner is the first thing that my eye was drawn
to, instead of your headline.

In addition, the banner doesn't really communicate
the benefits of what you're offering.

I'd test removing the banner completely.

2. Headline

The current headline isn't particularly strong.

You need to have a headline that stops people in their
tracks and gets them to read the rest of the page.

Your banner is taking away attention from your headline.

3. Benefits

To get people to sign-up to your list you need to provide
people with benefits, benefits and more benefits.

There are NO bullets on your opt-in page to provide
people with an idea of the compelling benefits they'll
get by signing-up to join your list.

4. Colors

There are too many colors on your page and they're
not well co-ordinated either. So far you've got red,
blue, teal, black and a lighter teal background.

It's a good design practice to use two or three dominant
colors on your site that co-ordinate well together.

I'd definitely test having a plain white background as the
light teal looks out of place (IMO) and detracts from the
rest of the elements on the page.

5. Sign-up Box

I see that you're using the javascript code from AWeber
rather than the raw HTML version.

Note: If you're visitor has javascript turned off on their
browser - then your sign-up form won't show up at all.

Use the raw HTML code from AWeber instead so you
have more control over your form and it'll show on all
browser settings.

Also, remove the visible hyperlinks to AWeber in the
web form itself.

I like simple, focused squeeze pages rather than going
too fancy on graphics and colors etc.

Dedicated to mutual success,

Shaun

I have to say, this response Shaun just gave you was worth actual money...

Thanks

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Justin Toner 12 years ago

Thanks for all the feedback guys.

@Shaun - Cheers Shaun, you gave me some very detailed changes that should (and will) be made to the page itself.
This is all pretty new to me, so it's a 'Learn as You Go' strategy!
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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FREE Weight Loss eBook
www.MindAndBodyWeightLoss.com
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- Global Warrior 12 years ago
  
  You have had some great advice here. Just a quickie from me:
  
  You should probably mention that the book is available as a download. You have come to an IM forum, so everyone here knows that, the people that might opt in to your form may not and therefore might not if they get it in their head that they have to wait 7 days.
  
  All the best
  
  GW
  
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  Justin Toner 12 years ago
  
  Thanks GW - another good pointer
  
  Thanks
  
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  FREE Weight Loss eBook
  www.MindAndBodyWeightLoss.com
  
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Derek Soto 12 years ago

I just opted in to you list Justin, the first thing I would test is the graphic of the ebook, if you could make it smoothly blend in with the white background instead of the "cut off" shadow that may add some professionalism, but pretty dag good page brother!
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Paramjakhar Banned 12 years ago

[DELETED]

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- Derek Soto 12 years ago
  
  You could use a free service called "google website optimizer" and you can make several versions of your landing page and google will split the traffic you send to your url to the different variations and you can see which ones convert better and create new controls. I've done this and it's very interesting that sometimes just the "color" of your headline can make a difference!
  
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Karan Goel 12 years ago

Copyright © 2010 - 2011 - MindAndBodyWeightLoss.com

It's 2012!

What The Experts Won't Tell You!

I expected to see 3-5 solid points here!

Karan
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- 1 reply
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- Joseph G Spiteri 12 years ago
  
  At first glance header is difficult to read dos not pop out I would put in a few bulet points to emphasize the plus's.
  
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asepkomara 12 years ago

I think your graphics is really simple. I'm afraid you should hire a professional graphic designer.
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MaryKathan 12 years ago

Just to add.... I noticed the word "beginning" is not capitalized when all the other words are capitalized (in the red colored section)
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hustlinsmoke 12 years ago

Maybe a call to action that puts a time frame on the information you need. Sort of like a dime sale, only 57 left or whatever.

I actually like squeeze pages to the point, but research has been done to show the long squeeze pages work better.
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KevinW 12 years ago

What about video?

In almost every case a video can increase optin rates. Just a short video will do. I just did one last week for my SEO squeeze pages. Just a few points and direct to optin form. It helps.

I did this video for a promotion on a "Good Example of Squeeze Page Video"

YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.

With your page...I don't like the background color. I would probably go all white with a different header.

I also like a wider text area but that just me....

I hope this helps.

Kevin
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Can you critique my squeeze page?

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