Need Some Constructive Criticism

39 replies
Ok, so i'm making a site for a client and want some constructive criticism of everything I've accomplished so far.

What should I change and what do I need to work on in your oppinions.

Will give Thanks to everyone who helps Thanks guys!

- Law Offices of John Doe
#constructive #criticism
  • Profile picture of the author modernians
    My personal opinion is that is looks ok, but theres a lot of text!! If I was interested in this service, I would soon move on to another better laid out site. Try and write brief descriptions of each service with a nice picture for each. Then have a more button so they can read more information on each. My opinion is that the front page needs to be like a shops front window, and at the moment your shop looks rather boring!!
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    That is true.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    What do you think about lessening the text on the first page and adding a slider?
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  • Profile picture of the author hicksdelight
    It might just be my computer but the site loaded quite slow, and errors came up in the bar at the bottom to do with the button widget.

    The word 'DUI' is mentioned FAR too often, some of the text just didn't read well.

    As said also, the layout I don't like at all, as soon as I went on the site it just looked like a spammy site and didn't gain my trust at all.

    Try and write brief descriptions of each service with a nice picture for each. Then have a more button so they can read more information on each. My opinion is that the front page needs to be like a shops front window, and at the moment your shop looks rather boring!!
    This^
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Loads in about 2 seconds on my comp and phone so idk.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    So what do you all think about a slider on home page followed by like blog posts. Each post being a different service. Itll have a brief description and a more button leading to the original pages I have set up.

    I will be redoing some of the text and making it easier to read, like bullet points and so on. I have only put a few hours into the site and just need to fixate on an attack route.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Something similar to this Herbal Remedies relating to the picture - brief description of services - more button.
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  • Profile picture of the author makingiants
    Looks nie. Good colors, but let people know right away
    what it's about: DUI. Have a headline that gives them
    their desired outcome: beating the dui.

    Then they an read further. I suggest a nice video of
    about 1-3 minutes max that shos how effective the attorney
    is with duis, his track record, what he can do for you, etc-a
    commercial.

    Then inlude an optin form and contact information in bold
    fonts. A business website is a ommercial, so give those
    who first visit it that first impression: they have short attention
    spans of less than 20 seconds. Grab them or lose them.

    HTH
    Vince aka makingiants
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Very true Giants, yes when i meet with the business owner soon I will be implementing all of those aspects. I'm justing waiting on him so I can get the materials.
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    • Profile picture of the author Christopher Fox
      I got this far

      Certain serious traffic offenses can be a serious problem for Phoenix residents, in particular those that carry steep fines, put your license in jeopardy, increase your insurance rates or are criminal offenses such as DUI. When facing any such traffic offense such as speeding or reckless driving, it is strongly advised that you contact a defense lawyer who will assist you fighting the traffic or DUI charges. The consequences of driving under the influence are nothing to be taken lightly and should be fought both proactively and aggressively.
      Go through your text. Doesn't sound right when you use serious back to back like that. Nothing is not the right word to use.

      Words are important. Outsource if you need. If you do not have cash to outsource, look for a competent writer that may be in your same startup boat as well and wouldn't mind reviewing/editing/rewriting your site for networking purposes, receiving some cash on the back end after you get paid and for future work. (read: when you land your next paying gig you funnel the writing work to them for reasonable financial compensation or will trade their writing for your designing a webpage for them).
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  • Profile picture of the author BozakAxel
    tighten up the copy, or spread it across multiple pages. right now it is too text heavy.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Ok everyone thanks for the help. My main goal will be to lessen text and edit it to read much better. Along with editing the header/footer.
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  • Profile picture of the author travlinguy
    The site is clean with an overall professional appearance. I agree that you need to really trim down the content. If you're like me you don't like editing good work but I'd say the the material on the home and a few other pages needs to be cut in half. Otherwise, nice work. I think your client will be pleased.
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    • I don't think you get what people are telling you, probably because they're not stating it correctly.

      There isn't "too much text." There's too much information.

      This is a landing page. You don't go into detail on a landing page because you've got about 30 seconds to convince your visitor to stay. The content you have there now reads like it was written by someone trying to fill a word quota.

      Get a professional editor. The text on your landing page shouldn't be more than 100 words. You have three or four major points you're trying to make. A professional can do this for you.

      fLufF
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  • Profile picture of the author SeanSupplee
    Id swap the contact us up to the top and put the other practices down under it. The contact you want in clear sight because they want more clients. But to be honest it really does not look like a legitimate website it looks more like a sub blog that should be attached to a authority website just to get traffic going their way. Not sure what the clients looking for so hard to give you any pointers on what direction to go with it.
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  • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
    Banned
    Not sure why everyone thinks it needs less content. It's a website for a law office, not a sales page. Most law office websites have attorney profiles, case histories, law information on their specialties, etc.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    @fluffy - I didn't write it and im definitely going to be working on that

    @Sean - What direction would you go in.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    @sbu - that is true, the content just needs to be modified to read better and look more professional. Perhaps ill pay a copywriter to do the first page as fluffy suggested.
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    • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
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      Originally Posted by Mav91890 View Post

      @sbu - that is true, the content just needs to be modified to read better and look more professional. Perhaps ill pay a copywriter to do the first page as fluffy suggested.
      Lawyer sites are typically boring, both in looks and content, unless you happen to need a lawyer at the time. I can honestly say I've never seen an interesting looking law site. Lawyers are a pretty conservative bunch when it comes to "creativity."

      I built a lawyer site for a lawyer that I was working full time for. Without saying so, their directives were make it look as dull as mud, but it had all the same type of info that you are going to include.
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  • Profile picture of the author Tadresources
    Decent site, but I've seen very similar layouts in a ton of other lawyer sites. Obviously these sites are going to be somewhat similar because they're about the exact same subject, but the similarities are so close it almost looks like a clone.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    It is probably because of the theme I chose. After I get paid I'm going to invest in a designers professional theme license.
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  • Profile picture of the author Webgeniuz1
    Hello Mav,

    Here is my 2 cents if it's worth anything.

    When developing websites:

    1. I specifically stay away from really bold colors like dark consistent "Red's" I feel that this will overwhelm user.

    2. As stated above over and over, too much text. Maybe display some of this text in "DropDowns" from the right hand margin.

    3. Replace the "Favicon" (rss Feed) with possibly their logo.

    4. There are some styling issues with "Like Me On Facebook"

    5. Not a big fan of the "Yellow Text" in the contact form, maybe try keeping it a standard font color throughout the site (white)??

    6. Possibly add A Site Map good for SEO.

    7. When search is clicked, and no text has been implemented. Show all queries or results from your blog so it looks "Full" with content.

    Just my two cents Mav, good start however!
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    @web - Thanks for your reply. This is just the prototype so far so I have something to build off of.

    My client will be giving me some of his content to use like his attorney profile and logo for the favicon. Also, I will be building strong internal linking which has ranked my sites before without offpage seo for keywords like - "how to eat healthy" & "detox diets".
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    • Profile picture of the author Webgeniuz1
      Brilliant! you've got it on lock then!!!

      Remember to integrate Google Analytics! A very useful tool and one that your client will greatly appreciate!

      Make sure you remember aswell to submit your site in to search engines, however I am sure that you don't need that tip! You seem like you got a good head on your shoulders! Haha. But I thought i'd throw it out there anyhow.

      All the best and good luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Definitely Usmile, that is my objective tonight.
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  • Profile picture of the author James Hessler
    Thanks for putting your site up for 'examination '.

    My 2c...

    As some have mentioned Less text on first page, and broken down into bullet points, with lead ins on part of the content.

    I would put up a video, shot in suitable office, and on a player like evp2 or similar, where you can show relevant buttons shown( within the video) at timed points which direct to certain pages or 'offers'

    I realize it's a lawyers site, and not in the money making niche, but eloquent designed accordingly links within the video may bring about more calls to action from prospective clients.

    Hope this helps.

    As a work in progress? It's a great start.

    Thanks again for putting it out there to invite constructive criticism.

    Regards

    James
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    After I sell this site Im going to buy licenses to Templatic Themes Demo

    I think this looks great and my clients would love it.
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  • Profile picture of the author JeremiahSay
    I like your template, it's simple and easy.. but maybe you might wanna consider adding some videos, pics to enhance the look..

    Another thing is that, you should shift you contact form up, I think this way it will convert better ..

    Just my personal opinion,

    Hope it help,
    Jeremiah
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  • Profile picture of the author RnGWriter
    I suggest that you put in some pictures of the actual lawyers. It is a very good technique of you are trying to sell a service on the internet. That way, your visitors will have someone to trust.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Yes that is a good idea and will be done, thank you.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mav91890
    Basic is great.
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  • Profile picture of the author HD
    Two comments stood out for me, and feels as though they may have hit the nail on the head with a sledgehammer: #17 and #31.

    If/When I get that DUI in Arizona and reach this website of Mr. John Doe, I'll be reading, swallowing, and digesting each and every word to see if this gentleman is right for my case and...

    They say a picture is worth a thousand words. First, I would like to see a picture of this crook to represent me in court and secondly, are you aware of the size of Lawyers egos? Into the stratosphere if not further. A pic of the Lawyer/Law firm should satisfy the client (me) as well as the Lawyers incredibly massive ego. :rolleyes:

    Good Luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author Les Blythe
    Pretty much agree with what has been said so far but my initial reactions were:

    1) Take out red background looks a little too much for me. Replace with something rather more neutral to make reading easier.
    2) Move opt in form to top right of page so it is always "above the fold"
    3) Break up text - a video at the top would be good and put "dividers" in between sections - could be smaller images of the gavel for example.
    4) As this is a business website - I personally would not use a blog style page that allows comments - in fact attorney's may not like this as they sell info - not give it away

    Overall looks quite nice but needs to function more like a landing/ squeeze page - a strong call to action never hurts.

    Just my initial thoughts.
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  • Profile picture of the author SergeLight
    Place find a nice template on themeforest. There are way better themesout there for a fraction of what you can ask for a website. The site is very basic and ok. But I don't think that it is a good representation for a lawyer. For a lawyer, i think it looks cheap. It's a good site for adsense or selling something
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  • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
    Banned
    I've been looking around at other DUI lawyer sites. Finally found one that I thought had a nice layout and was interesting.

    Utah DUI Attorney : Salt Lake City DUI Lawyer & Attorney : Glen Neeley : Serving Davis County, Ogden, Brigham City, Logan

    It's a moveabletype blog.
    MovableType.org - Home of the MT Community

    Looked at many others and most of them were just boring.
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  • Profile picture of the author jamesrich1
    It doesn't make me want to read the page. Video works better with me. The famous Frank Kern process.
    1. Here's what we have.
    2. Here's what it will do for you.
    3. Here is what you do next.

    A short video that caught my attention letting me know the three steps would make me take action and call you if I was interested.
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