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$25 prize for the best headline

by Kim Standerline
35 replies
Hi guys

I'm updating this site, (It's in a state of flux at the mo so I know its a mess and images etc are missing) www.membership-secrets.com

What I'm looking for is a headline, (the one there sucks) I want something catchy (obviously) to catch what I'm trying to say about my book)

I need to get this page rewritten within the next couple of days, and at the moment my brain is pea soup consistancy.

$25 to the one I like the best.

BTW scroll down and check out the really cool graphics, plus header etc. (that's graphicsgenie for ya)

Cheers
Kim
#$25 #headline #prize
  • Profile picture of the author JayXtreme
    How To Show Your People, Client's, and Subscribers That Membership Has It's Benefits!

    LOL.. that's probably too close to one of the major CC companies

    Jay
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    Bare Murkage.........

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    • Profile picture of the author Roy Carter
      "Discover How I've Now Made It Ridiculously Simple For You To Start Your Own Membership Site
      That Will Bring You In Mega Monthly Recurring Profits Direct To Your Bank Account!"

      Roy
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      "How To Hang Out On Various Exotic Islands Whilst Still Making Shed Loads Of Money...and stuff!" - Get your FREE ISSUE entitled...'A Quick, Easy $2,000 In Your Pocket By This Weekend!'
      >> ---> http://LettersFromASmallIsland.com/sq1.html <--- < <
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      • Profile picture of the author Marian Berghes
        Overload your bank account with money by having your own Membership Site ! A system made easy that will make you loads of cash !
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        • Profile picture of the author John Taylor
          "Would You Like The Security Of A Regular Monthly Income From A Bunch Of Raving Enthusiasts Desperate To Pay You Each And Every Month?"
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          John's Internet Marketing News, Views & Reviews: John Taylor Online
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          • Profile picture of the author MoaddinFM
            "5-6 figures / month secrets exposed! Learn what the Gurus don´t want to you to know and kept secret from the rest of the world! And the best thing is, you can do this too without nearly any effort!"

            Frank had the very same idea Build curiosity, it´s a secret (ppl like it), tell them it´s easy and they don´t have to work for it.
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            Martin Fehrenbach
            Dominate FB groups in less than a day - And make $$$$

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            • Profile picture of the author Andrew Wilkes
              Banned
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              • Profile picture of the author Aegon
                Maybe its because I'm an experience internet-explorer-guy...But...I wouldn't open a message with any of those headlines...To me it would be obvious spam
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          • Profile picture of the author HeySal
            I think you should just keep " Prediction for 2008 is Membership Sites Are Set To Soar"
            (change 2008 to 2009) and cut the rest.

            Then change the second line to:

            How will the huge earning potential (up to 100,000 a month!) and ease of running a membership site reap major wealth for membership site owners in 2009?

            then go into your pitch with a tad about the social site craze mixed in for logical support of the prediction.
            Signature

            Sal
            When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
            Beyond the Path

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        • Profile picture of the author ErinJoi
          How about something refreshing... simplicity and honesty!

          "How to Make Recurring Income With A Membership Site" (Title)
          "A simple manual to make your site work for YOU" (Sub-title)

          And with a price point of only $37, you can gear yourself towards the "Book" crowd, not the people out there expecting to pay $67 or higher for some guru's opinion.

          I know, for at least myself, I am tired of everybody claiming to have the Newest and Greatest thing on earth for me to buy. Sure, I want a membership site, but what can you offer me that nobody else can? Why should I buy your product over other people's product? - That is what I am thinking anyway.

          Make your headline honest. Make me see your sincerity. Make me feel like I am getting information from somebody who has been there, done that, and is actually making money. We see those paypal screens everywhere... sure they are nice to see, but that is what YOU make. And YOU are the professional, right? What about the average person - what will we make? How long did it take you to get to that point? How much advertising did you have to do? Would the average person know how, or have the time to do the advertising you did?

          Why not make your ebook free, and offer a paid membership forum for updated information? Prove to them that what you are doing is actually working!

          Sorry - I don't mean to be Debbie Downer! I have just gotten to the point where I click off of normal sales letters. Everybody has one, and I just can't tell them apart anymore!

          One thing... you might have this on your "to-do" list since you are updating your site, but this sentence:

          If like myself you're in the business of making money from the Internet, then you may be wondering why the income stream you have been promised by all those "guru's" hasn't actually manifested yet.

          Is worded funny. How about this instead:

          "If you are like myself and in the business of making money from the Internet, then you may be wondering why the income stream you have been promised by all those "gurus" hasn't manifested yet."

          I know what it is like when you write, write, and write some more - it is easy to overlook those things.

          Good luck!
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      • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
        I'm a sucker for competitions...

        How about:

        SSSHHH...Don't Tell Everyone, But You're About To Discover The NUMBER ONE Best-Kept Secret In Internet Marketing..

        ..And Why There's Never Been A Better Time Than NOW For YOU To Start Your Own HIGHLY PROFITABLE Membership Site


        (tried to tie in with the graphics - which are GREAT btw)


        All the best with the book.

        Frank
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        • Profile picture of the author Stanley Tang
          "Discover The Insider Secrets To Running Your Own Membership Sites"

          Discover The Insider Secrets To Getting Paid Month After Month... On Complete Autopilot!"
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          eMillions: Behind-The-Scenes Stories of 14 Successful Internet Millionaires
          Get Your Copy of The #1 Best-Seller Now At Amazon For $13.57

          http://www.emillionsbook.com
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        • Profile picture of the author Kim Standerline
          Originally Posted by Frank Donovan View Post

          I'm a sucker for competitions...

          How about:

          SSSHHH...Don't Tell Everyone, But You're About To Discover The NUMBER ONE Best-Kept Secret In Internet Marketing..

          ..And Why There's Never Been A Better Time Than NOW For YOU To Start Your Own HIGHLY PROFITABLE Membership Site


          (tried to tie in with the graphics - which are GREAT btw)


          All the best with the book.

          Frank
          I like this one, I can really work with it.

          Thanks everyone for your help, it was much appreciated.

          Frank I'm going to pm you to ask you for your paypal addy. (doncha just miss buy me a beer lol)

          Cheers
          Kim
          Signature
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          • Profile picture of the author David Raybould
            Hi Kim,

            I'm always a big fan of headlines with some specifics in - something like:

            "How To Make $67,243 From A Single Membership Site That Takes Less Than 5 Hours To Set Up"

            Obviously you'd need to edit it so the details are correct, but I think it would work okay...

            David
            Signature
            Killer Emails. Cash-spewing VSLs. Turbocharged Landing Pages.

            Whatever you need, my high converting copy puts more money in your pocket. PM for details. 10 years experience and 9 figure revenues.
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          • Profile picture of the author MaskedMarketer
            Originally Posted by Kim Standerline View Post

            I like this one, I can really work with it.

            Thanks everyone for your help, it was much appreciated.

            Frank I'm going to pm you to ask you for your paypal addy. (doncha just miss buy me a beer lol)

            Cheers
            Kim

            That headline still needs to be tweaked. Needs to be more clear and specific of the benefit and of the ROI- Your entire offer should be in your headline and this would need to be expanded...
            Signature

            "One Man's Ceiling is Another Man's Floor            "

            "I Pay Less Attention to What Men Say. I Just Watch What They Do."
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Lee
    "Here's the Easiest Way to Earn Massive Recurring Income On Autopilot... Guaranteed To Work Even If You're Lazy Or Clueless On What To Do!"
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    (Free) How To SLEEP Your Way To Unstoppable Riches & Success | (Free) 1 Weird Trick To Create Miracles | 100+ Free Self-Help Books | "I was shocked when your site converted at 5.1%!" - 20DayPersuasion Affiliate
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    • Profile picture of the author MarketingMommy
      What about something like, "Welcome to the Inner Circle, prepare to soar above the average earner."

      I dunno I'm new.. just had to put in my two cents.
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      • Profile picture of the author glchandler
        "What You Do Not Know About Membership Sites Is Costing You A Fortune"

        ....... Look Over My Shoulder As I Reveal The Steps To Membership Site Success.......



        Now I am off to practice special effects as color/font/size on posts!!
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        There is never a BAD time to help those living with lousy kidneys!
        http://funds.gofundme.com/1oh40


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        • Profile picture of the author Alex Lin
          (Headline)
          If You Are Banging Your Head To The Wall... Looking For Something Simple to Make Recurring Income, Then This is Exactly What You have Been Looking For.

          (Subtitle)
          Here's a manual show you on how to run a
          membership site easy and fast ...
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          • Profile picture of the author ecoverartist
            (Headline)
            Make Easy Money Every Month - Automatically! It's Possible When You Know How to Run a Membership Site the RIGHT Way...

            (Subheadline)
            Here's Your Chance to Learn from the Membership Masters! I Guarantee You'll Be Up and Running in Hours - Not Days - or You Pay Nothing!
            Signature
            Sherice Jacob - Conversion Expert & Copywriter
            Learn Copywriting from a Pro. Build your Portfolio. Start Reaching Clients
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          • Profile picture of the author Don Alm
            Banned
            [DELETED]
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            • Profile picture of the author Kim Standerline
              Hi guys

              I jut wanted to say thanks for all the suggestions (including the pm's).

              I'm going to check them out later today and post which one I like the best

              Cheers
              Kim
              Signature
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              • Profile picture of the author Adeel_Chowdhry
                "Who Else Would Like To Discover The TRUE Insider SECRETS To Recurring Income By Setting Up Your Own ARMY Of Money Sucking MEMBERSHIP Sites Running On 99% Automation?"


                - Yours Truly


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                • Profile picture of the author Kim Standerline
                  Originally Posted by Adeel_Chowdhry View Post

                  "Who Else Would Like To Discover The TRUE Insider SECRETS To Recurring Income By Setting Up Your Own ARMY Of Money Sucking MEMBERSHIP Sites Running On 99% Automation?"




                  - Yours Truly
                  OMG Adeel what did u do to your avatar lol
                  Signature
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                  • Profile picture of the author Graham Maddison
                    It's No Secret! Membership Sites Work. FACT!
                    If you want to earn a substantial recurring income, then read on.


                    Graham
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                    Trade without Boundaries.
                    Start with $30 Trading Bonus.
                    No Deposit Required
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                  • Profile picture of the author lakshaybehl
                    "Discover How To Make Monthly "Flames Of Cash" With Membership Sites That Make You Rich Month After Month While You Spend Your Time On Basking In The Glory Of the Green"
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                    WARNING EXPLICIT: This is ugly... and this is the distilled truth


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                  • Profile picture of the author Adeel_Chowdhry
                    Originally Posted by Kim Standerline View Post

                    OMG Adeel what did u do to your avatar lol
                    People call me an attention seeker...I don't quite know why...

                    --

                    It was for the 'avatar' thread that's on the main forum

                    Adeel
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                  • Profile picture of the author MaskedMarketer
                    What about something like this...

                    ------------------------------


                    STOP!                    How Would You Like To Learn The Proven Insider Secrets To Creating Income Producing Websites That Deposit A Guaranteed Monthly Check Directly Into Your Bank Account...

                    "Because This Low Investment, Highly Guarded, Information Packed E-Course, Shows You The Exact Strategies The 'Top Guns ' Use To Start A Website That Generates A Guaranteed Recurring Monthly Profit Of $9,000 - $140,000+ A Month And Runs On 98% Automation!"

                    BEWARE : " Our Iron Clad , Money Back Guarantee , Protects You With Your Investment...You Have Nothing To Lose!"

                    Read On To Discover Why The Predication Of Our "Guaranteed Members Method" Is Set To Explode In 2008 And How You Can Reap The Rewards Of These Proven Techniques That Only The "Inner Circle" Marketers Know Exist...
                    Signature

                    "One Man's Ceiling is Another Man's Floor                    "

                    "I Pay Less Attention to What Men Say. I Just Watch What They Do."
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  • Profile picture of the author Steven Fullman
    ...half done, I've got 3 of the main elements in there (quick, easy, money), I just need the 4th...
    Membership Site Secrets...

    "It's So EASY. Simply Spend A Few Short MINUTES With Your Visitors, Whilst They Happily Throw Wads Of CASH At You...
    ...Over And Over Again, Like Clockwork!"
    Signature

    Not promoting right now

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