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New Parent - How Do You Balance It All?

by ryanjohn23
31 replies
I'm a new first time parent as of 6 weeks ago . I run an IM business, a residential real estate investing company, and love to spend time with my family and volunteer in the community. And I primarily work from home.

I thought I had it all under control... until Jr came along and now he's the boss. LOL

So my question is, does anyone have advice for new parents that are making that adjustment trying to balance it all (run IM business from home and be a good and attentive parent)?

Thanks!
#balance #parent #real estate
  • Profile picture of the author E. Brian Rose
    Congratulations on the new boss! My suggestion is to step it up and get a hold of her...

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  • Profile picture of the author TheArticlePros
    I have no kids at all, but I have heard that a roll of duct tape can hold a kid for at least 2-3 hours. (Once he grows teeth, that estimate drops to under an hour.) Just fashion a comfortable harness and stick the kid to the wall near your desk so that you can keep an eye on him and you should be good.

    -- j
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  • Profile picture of the author gentryliving
    I also have no kids at this time but praying to have. My wife and I just celebrated our first year anniversary.
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  • Profile picture of the author James Foster
    Daycare.

    That's been the best help I've got with my little one.... even if it's just half days.

    It's nearly impossible to get any work done with a kid needing attention every 2 minutes.
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  • Profile picture of the author ohohdon
    I made it a practice to get up and get going earlier in the morning. When everyone else is sleeping, I can get more done.
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    • Profile picture of the author scottlaf518
      I always laugh when I see people that have no kids talk about how exhausted they are. Once you have children, exhaustion kicks up to a whole new level. As was said above, one of the keys I've found is to get work done while the little ones are sleeping. Time management is essential. Daycare even two days a week would give you a chance to get some stuff accomplished. Good luck, and congrats!
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  • Profile picture of the author bigslamgyrl
    Congratulations, a new baby is amazing.

    I have to agree with James, I would really consider putting your new little one in daycare, even if it is only for a few hours. I know it's hard, especially when he's brand new, but you want to be as focused as you can on work and that way you can be entirely focused on him when he is home.

    I am a mom and my son goes to a school program and an after school activity before I pick him up. So my day usually runs like this:
    - 7:45 - drop him off
    - 8:00 - errands (bank, groceries, etc.)
    - 8:30-9:00 - start my day online

    And I pick him up by 4:30 every day. So in reality, I don't even work a full 8 hour day. But the time that I am working is very focused on everything that I need to do so that I can spend all of my non-working time with him.

    Sure, I do answer emails and do little things occasionally while he is home, but they are all simple tasks that I can easily walk away from and pick back up later.

    Good luck
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  • Profile picture of the author purpletree
    I have 3 kids so please trust me when I tell you this. Your child is not the boss..YOU ARE...and I know you probably meant this light heartedly but if you do any work from home while your child is not at day care then, EVEN AS A BABY, you have let your baby cry sometimes. I'm not talking about "Meet the Fockers" extreme "self soothing" tactics. You know your baby best and when it is ok for him or her to be in a safe place with out you having to hold him or her. It's obvious how excited you are to be a new father and I wish you the best!
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  • Profile picture of the author johnbro
    I have a daughter and there times when I had to be like a night owl. I could work only after she's gone to sleep. Now she's 3.5 years old and I just tell her that I am working for her, for mom so that we can have the good things in life, and she doesn't disturb me! I consider myself so fortunate to have her, makes me want to work more sincerely.
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  • Profile picture of the author mikelukjaniec
    You're talking about basic 'time management' which is a skill you can learn. Tim Sales the MLM multi-millionaire was a bomb disposal expert in the US army when he started his MLM business and had very little time in the evenings. However, with discipline and perserverance, he gradually built his business up! I think the secret is to do a little bit at a time, consistently! It's still a tough call though but don't let that put you off!
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  • Profile picture of the author ryanjohn23
    I appreciate all the advice from everyone. I don't want it to seem like I'm complaining at all, because I've never been happier in my life than I am when I see my son. It's funny because the second I see his eyes closed I've had to turn it into a game to see how much I can get done while he's sleep. LOL!

    Thanks again guys
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  • Profile picture of the author Rose Anderson
    Some churches offer Mother's day out programs two or three days a week. They are often a lot cheaper than daycare. Even having two days to completely focus on work can be a big help.

    Rose
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  • Profile picture of the author michaeljcheney
    Very time appropriate, my wife and I just had our first - baby Holly around 7 weeks' ago so I'm living this very thing right this minute! :-)

    The best I can say is to:

    - Go with the flow for the first few weeks and don't have any major projects or deadlines due
    - Go easy on yourself at first, you won't get anywhere near as much done
    - Remember to spend time with your wife and baby, this time will go fast and you don't want to miss it by spending too much time working
    - Set one major goal / To Do item per day and get it done, anything else is a bonus
    - Be flexible if you can and work when you have energy (not when the clock tells you, you should)

    Enjoy!
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    • Profile picture of the author cashp0wer
      Congratulations on the little one. Just take it from me these little people grow up so fast. Before you know it they will be asking you for the car keys so enjoy them as much as you possibly can. Work around her schedule right now - she is the boss - work when she sleeps, etc.
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  • Profile picture of the author Chronic IM
    Hello!

    First of all, congratulations on the new stage of your life. Nae. You should try time management if your really wanna spend time on taking care of your baby but you can also try hiring a baby sitter. I hope that helped you in a way or so.

    Best of Luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author savvybizbuilder
    Congratulations! Since you work at home, it much easier for you to balance family and work. Its matters on how you manage your time.
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  • Profile picture of the author louie6925
    First off, congratulations on Jr!!!! I have a fulltime job, run a fire training business and have two young kids and my IM work is done as and when (thank god for smart phones). I have to be honest and say 6months - 3 years old it is hard to fit stuff in and you just have to go with the flow and do IM whenever possible! after that it starts becomming easier and you will have more and more time! Don't do what I did and burn the candles at both ends! I regularly would be up until 3 am working on IM, and my health suffered! Being awake and lively and there for Jr must take prioroty! enjoy it why you can and savour every minute as they grow up too bloody fast!!!

    Best wishes to you!
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    • Profile picture of the author joefizz
      Hey congratulations,

      As a proud father of 3 girls, running a real estate company, a finance company and a growing IM empire...I understand the demands of being spread thin...

      Just accept for the time being that junior is the no1 priority! This time will never come your way again...so, make the most of it!

      Pareto's rule comes to mind...the old 80/20 thing...

      1. Focus your time on the important jobs, not urgent ones...
      2. Work in blocks and make sure you are locked away for your business time!
      3. Work on good time management principles like the 4d's
      • Do (prioritise as above)
      • Delegate
      • Diarise
      • Dump

      4. An old wives tale, but it works...sleep when the baby sleeps...it keeps you sane.
      5. Finally, use help, wherever available!

      Hey, I wrote a book about raising children in a happy, confident and rounded way. Available in Amazon and Kindle...

      www.howtoraisechildrensuccessfully.com

      But as an aside, I offered it as an ebook WSO too, so search:

      http://www.warriorforum.com/warrior-...ully-book.html

      My biggest love of IM, is being more in control of my time. When my 3 were born, I worked for a big corporation... so was welded to my desk and I regret that immensely!

      So my advice is... to enjoy every moment!

      I wish you every happiness!

      Wayne
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  • Profile picture of the author Cabbey
    My advice is to take each day moment by moment. Try to put in quality time with your family and also your work. Staying focused is key. You will be amazed at how much you will accomplish when you concentrate on your tasks at hand; whether it be working on projects or spending time with the family.

    These days will flee quicker than you realize. Don't look back with regrets.
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  • Profile picture of the author bob ross
    congrats!

    I'm 31 and have four kids already. I own a remodeling company, design firm, and do IM & Offline as well. It's crazy but fortunately my wife can stay home with the kids even though it drives her absolutely nuts.

    I suggest learning to work on very little sleep and getting most of your IM stuff done at night when they're asleep.
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  • Profile picture of the author iamlindasue
    I think if you can rearrange your schedule at home to fit around your babies needs everything will work out just fine. As important it is to provide a good living it is also very important to have quality time with your baby. As long as you are able to work at home I would think you could possibly be able to juggle both according to when your baby is sleeping etc.
    Also, have you considered hiring help just part time to come to your home to help out while you work? That way your baby would still be with you but you could concentrate on work. Good luck with you precious baby!
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  • Profile picture of the author Halcyon
    Congratulations on your new son! As a fellow parent I went through many sleepless nights trying to run a business and take care of my kids. Trust me, if you want to maintain some of your sanity you'll have to hone your time management skills and consider hiring a little help.

    Daycare is fine for toddlers and older kids but babies, IMHO need one on one attention. If you happen to find a daycare that offers that level of care, the price is usually astronomical.

    Consider hiring someone to come to you. This is much less expensive than daycare, plus you don't have to get the baby ready, drive to the daycare, drive back, try to get some work done, drive to the daycare and drive back. A real time saver. I don't know about your area but in OH, I found someone to come in for $10 per hour a few days per week.

    Let me tell you, those few hours per day were golden.
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  • Profile picture of the author Jessica Lynn
    I have 4 kids ages 2-7. I know it's HARD to get things done with them around. I'm only able to work productively during their naps, favorite TV shows and after they fall asleep at night.

    I may look into hiring a "mother's helper" over the summer, which I think will help a great deal. I also got a new phone (Samsung Galaxy Note) which I'm thinking will allow me to get more work done while sitting next to the kids on the couch because of it's large screen size and office suites that work perfectly with Dropbox.

    The best tip I can think of is to get your to-do list done and organized while the little one is still awake. That way, as soon as you have a free moment you know exactly what you need to do and don't waste any of your very limited time thinking about the next step.
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    • Profile picture of the author Matthew Iannotti
      Originally Posted by Jessica Lynn View Post

      I have 4 kids ages 2-7. I know it's HARD to get things done with them around. I'm only able to work productively during their naps, favorite TV shows and after they fall asleep at night.

      I may look into hiring a "mother's helper" over the summer, which I think will help a great deal. I also got a new phone (Samsung Galaxy Note) which I'm thinking will allow me to get more work done while sitting next to the kids on the couch because of it's large screen size and office suites that work perfectly with Dropbox.

      The best tip I can think of is to get your to-do list done and organized while the little one is still awake. That way, as soon as you have a free moment you know exactly what you need to do and don't waste any of your very limited time thinking about the next step.

      Woman are def much stronger than men... God bless ya for being able to do all that!
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  • Profile picture of the author datingworld
    Congratulations, the baby needs parents attention more than of nanny. Don't bring nanny in until it is extremely necessary. Good Luck
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  • Profile picture of the author Maui Mike
    Congratulations on your new addition my friend! As a father of two toddlers I can tell you that getting up early in the morning, during nap time and after you put them to bed will be potentially some of your most productive work hours.

    Trying to get some yoga and healthy relaxation practices in there as well
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  • Profile picture of the author steve995
    Congrats, albeit belatedly...

    Balance? That's something I think you leave at the door as a new parent, IMer, someone with a 'real job' and so on. 'Getting through' is maybe more like it, but no less fun for that!

    The key is, enjoy because as someone whose kids are just on the verge of teenhood, these 'newbie parent' times don't come around again!

    Good luck,

    Steve
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  • Profile picture of the author imgeek2727
    Just make sure you don't sleep in and treat it like any other job. Get up, get dressed, follow a routine and allocate yourself some time for work each day. What's more, actually stick to the time you have allocated for work and don't let yourself get distracted.
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  • Profile picture of the author mollymarkiewicz
    I have two kids and two grandkids! Their lil smiles and laughter make it all worth while. My biggest advise to you, GET YOUR SLEEP! You are no good to anyone without your rest. Sleep when they sleep, most things can wait.
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  • Profile picture of the author jonmay
    Congrats!!! I am glad you posted this and I am going to be checking back regularly for all the great advice! Because I just found out that I have my first little one on the way due in December! I'm nervously excited! lol And currently, I am a musician, server, and IMer so I know it will be a juggling act!
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